words in movies
PHOEBE: I can see that. A plate of brownies once told me a limerick.
PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
JOEY: Uhhh, I don't think you're gonna like this.
JOEY: I can't believe it's Christmas already. Ya know, I mean, one day your eatin' turkey, the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin' and you geese are a-layin'.
ROSS: Hey Rach. I, uh, got you a little present. [Rachel is not impressed]. . I'll open it. It's a Slinky! Remember, huh. [sings] Walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, everyone knows it's. . . just a big spring. Alright, you still mad at me becuase of the whole. . .
ROSS: I got some, uh, hers and hers towels for Susan and Carol. And, uh, I got this blouse for mom.
MONICA: Look at these authentic fake medals. I tell ya, mom's gonna be voted best dressed at the make-believe military academy.
RACHEL: Phoebe, I thought your dad was in prison.
PHOEBE: No, that's my stepdad. My real dad's the one that ran out on us before I was born.
PHOEBE: It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. [turns to leave]
PHOEBE: Um, gram, um, can I see the pictures of my dad again?
PHOEBE: OK, I smell smoke. Maybe that's 'cause someone's pants are on fire.
GRANDMOTHER: Look, I. . .
GRANDMOTHER: It was your mother's idea. Ya know, she didn't want you to know your real father because it hurt her so much when he left, and, I didn't want to go along with it, but, well then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her. Not impossible, but harder.
PHOEBE: Alright, so, what, he's not a famous tree surgeon? And then, I guess, OK, he doesn't live in a hut in Burma where there's no phones?
GRANDMOTHER: Last I heard, he was a pharmacist somewhere upstate.
GRANDMOTHER: Anyway, that's all I know. That, and this. [pulls apart a frame and pulls a picture out] This is the real him.
CHANDLER: Ya know I remember my father, all dressed up in the red suit, the big black boots, and the patent leather belt, sneakin around downstairs. He didn't want anybody to see him but he'd be drunk so he'd stumble, crash into something and wake everybody up.
MONICA: I hope she's OK.
JOEY: Yeah, I know exactly what she's goin' through.
RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. [hands her a smashed box]
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
CHANDLER: Hey, don't worry. I figure it'll be 2 hours to Phoebe's dad's house, they'll meet, they'll chat, they'll swap life stories, we'll still have plenty of time.
MONICA: For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive.
ROSS: No, no, I was turnin' the knob and, and. . . here it is.
ROSS: Oh, oh that's right, I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.
MONICA: No, if he doesn't like our cookies, too bad, I am not gonna be blackmailed. Look if worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
PHOEBE: OK, here I go. I'm goin' in.
PHOEBE: OK, here I go. . . here I go. . . I'm goin'. [she just sits in the cab]
ROSS: [sitting at table talking to a girl] It's hard to tell because I'm sweating, but I use exactly what the gel bottle says, an amount about the size of a pea. How, how can that be too much?
MONICA: Really? I'm perfectly comfortable. [one of the guest opens the refrigerator] Hey, hey, hey, get in line buddy, I was next. [she opens the refrigerator and leans into it]
MR. TREEGER: Ahh, is it hot? My body always stays cool, probably 'cause I have so much skin. Hey, cheese!
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
MR. TREEGER: Oh wow, I didn't get you anything. Here's five back.
MR. TREEGER: No can do, like I told the girl, I can't get a new knob until Thursday.
MR. TREEGER: No, the place is not open 'till Tuesday. Am I not saying it right.
MR. TREEGER: Ahh, if it was mistletoe, I was gonna kiss ya.
PHOEBE: Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, what if, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
JOEY: Uh, listen Phoebs, I know you're not goin' in there but do you think it'd be alright if I went in and used his bathroom? Oh, that's fine, never mind. Cool, snow, kinda like a blank canvas.
JOEY: Really, hey, you mind if I turn the heat down?
PHOEBE: Oh, I couldn't go in.
PHOEBE: Yeah, yeah, no it's OK 'cause, I mean, I know he's there, so, that's enough for now.
JOEY: Hey, Monica, the knob was broken so I just turned it off from underneath, I hope that's alright.
RACHEL: Wiper blades. I don't even have a car.
PHOEBE: Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
ROSS: Well this, this is too much, I feel like I should get you another sweater.
Ross: No, Chandler, you have to find the line between stealing and taking what the hotel owes you. For example: hair drier, no, no, no, but shampoo and conditioners, yes, yes, yes. (pause) Now, the salt shaker is off-limits, but the salt (he opens the salt shaker and pours the salt into his hand) I wish I'd thought this through.
Chandler: Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
Phoebe: I know! I know, and Ive only been playing for like an hour!
Chandler: Well, then, I might as well offer to stay.
Chandler: Yeah, I guess it's a little better now.
Mike: I get the joke. Sophisticated as it was. Now the thing I wanna say is... maybe we should have talked about this before. Us living together, you're not expecting a proposal, right?
Woman: Im Marjorie.
Phoebe: It's fun, God I love how sexy I am. (Coughs really loudly.)
Ross: Oh, thats not true! Ive got her lots of stuff she never took back.
Marjorie: I talk in my sleep.
Chandler: You mind if I
Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman! (Starts for his room.) And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition! Okay, look, if I have to pretend I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretend there's nothing to know about.
Rachel: Yeah I know its really boring, but its like a big deal. Anyway, I was thinking about renting Cujo sometime.
Phoebe: Yeah, I think we are.
Phoebe: I still cannot believe youre engaged! (Ross looks at her) Just cause its happening so fast; not cause youre such a loser.
Phoebe: Im not gonna right to you! Thats not real!
Monica: Im changing out of this.
Monica: Im getting married next!!
Phoebe: I guess.
MRS. GELLER: I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
Chandler: Because Im cooler.
Rachel: (regretful) I'm sorry, too! (they look at each other sadly, then she recollects, and puts her hands over her eyes) OH GOD! I shouldn't have said anything!
Monica: Well, are you asleep right now, Joe? Cause I dont think you have to wear it unless you are!
Joey: I can't! It-it's stuck!
Kim: Oh don't be sorry, that's part of your job here to give your opinions and then I take credit for them--I'm kidding.
Monica: Oh my God! Shes amazing. Oh, oh Im so glad you guys got drunk and had sex!
Monica: Again. Yknow what? I think we all did.
Ross: Well w-w-w-w-wait, w-wait, wait, wait a minute! I mean a couple of stupid boxes get wet and she gets a Porsche?!
Ross: Oh, Rachel, Im-Im sorry.
Rachel: Ohh, God, I just got so nervous that he would say no.
Rachel: Uh, well, I think, I think he broke up with me.
Rachel: Yeah! I got my girls.
Joey: Well, that's gonna be tough Mon. I mean it's hard for me to be around an attractive woman and not flirt.
Rachel: Im not gonna marry Chandler!
Joshua: I gotta go.
Joey: I know. Ross is getting married.
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
Chandler: Why not?! I mean its just, its just climbing! Its just, its just steep!
Phoebe: Ok. Oh good, I'm dating a Russian cab driver. (to the shop assistant). Seriously does anyone buy this? I smell like beets!
Phoebe: Are you kidding. He is so considerate of my feelings and... you know I think... you'd also like to know that he is a very gentle lover.
Joey: Ah, Gunther, I cant pay for this right now because Im not working, so Ive had to cut down on some luxuries like uh, payin for stuff.
Phoebe: Well, I am. (Moves over and takes his hand.)
Phoebe: What are you guys talking about, I loved it! It was soo moving. Oh, plus its just, its so different from the stuff you usually hear.
Rachel: I did.
Emily: I packed while you were gone. I left some knickers under your pillow.
Ross: Okay... okay, maybe I will...
Rachel: I knew.
Ross: I do.
Janice: Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get away this time.
Ross: See, I see.... big passion in your future.
Rachel: Yeah! Im gonna have a boyfriend, youre gonna have a girlfriend
Julio: I can write an epic poem about this lip. (grabs her lower lip)
Rachel: Assistant buyer. Oh! I would be shopping... for a living!
Monica: They baked it. I cant take this anymore. Im gonna call a meeting tonight, Im gonna fire you tonight.
Rachel: I could not have done this without you.
Phoebe: Yeah. I actually am, yeah. Y'know life-lifes gonna had you all kinds of stuff, y'know you learn your little lessons and hopefully you grow. Wanna hear a new song?
Ross: (stopping suddenly and getting up) Okay, I gotta go.
Monica: Oh, I wish there was a job where I could wear this all the time. (Pause) Maybe someday, there will be.
Monica: Oh God! Orange juice just came out of my nose, but it was totally worth it. Oh my God, I completely forgot about your sound.
Rachel: Well neither do I!
Ross: Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.
Ross: Oh Im, Im making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me to do.
CHANDLER: Oh, uh, he's not here right now, uh, I'm Chandler, can I take a message, or, or a fishtank?
Rachel: Well, actually, I meant for me. The hiring committee is meeting people all day and
Chandler: What a coincidence, I listen in my sleep.
Ross: No!! No!! I wanna stay. I wanna talk about this.
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
CHANDLER: Yeah, Karen. I'm thinking about having an affair with her. Oh, you know what? I just did.
Monica: You may be okay about getting hurt, but I am not okay with being the one who hurts you. Thats why I cant take this job.
Phoebe: Now if you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Ross: Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
RICHARD: Yeah, just, I feel like I'm about a hundred. I thought I was just one of the guys.
Chandler: I didnt know that.
Monica: I never knew that either.
Ross: The one with the cat. I gotta go, Ive got another date.
Monica: Im sorry honey.
Chandler: Well, yeah, but y'know, what-what if I was wrong?
Rachel: No, Ill think about it. Yeah.
Rachel: Oh, honey, I dont know. I
Ross: Listen, I got to tell you Ive-Ive never been to a guru before, so...
Ross: You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.
Chandler: Okay. Then I guess its just, wait here then. (Hands her the sign that says, Wait Here.") (To the ticket agent) Hi. I need one fake ticket to Yemen.
Joey: Oh. Maybe. But hey I know how I can find out. Were going to a New Years Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back, great! Yknow? But if she says Dude, what the hell are you doing? I can say It wasnt me, it was New Years!
Joey: (pointing) It worked! I scared ya, I knew it! Ha-ha!
Mr. Treeger: Yeah, it happened to me once. I was just flipping through the channels and bam! It was like finding money.
Ross: Rach, I got a message from you.
Ross: OK, I need to lie down.
Ross: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight.
Ross: No! No! I want to talk now! Okay? IIn fact, (picks up the phone) I am going to talk to the president of the condom company!
Ross: But come on! I mean living together will be great! I mean you guys have so much fun and you love Mike.
Joey: Oh, uh, again. Can I make a special request: Can you bring everything as soon as it�s ready? Appetizers, entrees, we don�t care.
Rachel: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight.
Mr. Geller: Now I'm depressed! ...(To everyone) Even more than I was.
Gunther: Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
Chandler: Well, I thought that would be the best thing to do.
Chandler: Nice going, imp. OK, it's OK. All I need to do is reach over and put it in my mouth. (Chandler slyly grabs the gum from the wall and slides it back in his mouth.)
Rachel: I just, I feel, I-I just...
Phoebe: Really?! I looked into that. Yeah, but, I mean it costs like $60,000 and yknow you can die. And, you would die!
Rachel: Noo! Maybe! I, I dont know.
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!