words in movies
Chandler: (excited) Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what Joey: Uh, ah, Monica's pregnant?! Monica: (shocked) Really? (She looks around, suddenly embarrassed) Let's get past the moment. Phoebe: What's your news? Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising. (Everybody cheers) Monica: (hugging Chandler) Oh, honey, that's incredible! Phoebe: (inquisitive) Gosh, what's the pay like? (Everybody stares at her indignantly) Oh, come on people (defending) come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most! (She looks at Joey) Hey Joey! (Joey winks at her) Chandler: Actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship. Joey: Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'. Chandler: Right. So, it'll be the same except less sex with you. (Joey nods) Ross: So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there? Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like. Phoebe: (enthusiastic) That's great. Chandler: Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some ground work which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating (At the same time, Gunther puts down a cup of coffee in front of Chandler) Chandler: (grinning awkwardly) Humiliating and noble! (Gunther shoots a nasty look at him while leaving) Ross: You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising. Monica: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?" Ross: Yes, I did, I did! (He turns to Joey, disappointed) I should have written it down!
Monica: (to Rachel) Hey! Joey said no autographs! But if she's gettting one, then I want one too: To Monica. And none of this "best wishes" crap. I want "love".
Phoebe: Mike knows I'm coming, and if I don't show up he'll think it's because of him! And I don't want to lose face! That's a very serious thing in my culture.
Monica: Yeah, you were, but you decided to make salmon because you had some left over at the restaurant. And then you realised if you (Points at Rachel) bitched about it, then you (Points to herself) would stop cooking, and you (Points at Rachel) would have to make your famous baked potato and Diet Coke.
Ross: Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!
Rachel: Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that Im looking for him and that this I am not gonna throw up!
Chandler: Im full, and yet I know if I stop eating this, Ill regret it.
Joey: If you get a second, find out where she got that cheeseburger.
Joey: What, are you crazy? You havent beaten me once since my injury plagued 97 season. It would be easier if you just give me your money.
Rachel: Y'know, I figure if I can make coffee, there isn't anything I can't do.
Chandler: What rule? There's no rule, if anything, you owe me a table!
Ross: It's awful I know, I mean, I feel terrible but I have to do this if I want my marriage to work. And I do, I have to make this marriage work. I have too. But the good thing is we can still see each other until she gets here.
ROSS: You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday, this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, who cares.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, okay. Uh, look buddy, I came with that girl, and I had this plan to kiss her at the new years countdown Im trying to win her over, so I was wondering if..
Monica: And it has to go perfectly, because if she doesn't like something about us she can keep us off every adoption list in the state.
Barry: Well, if you want, I'll justI'll just break it off with her.
Chandler: If it helps, I could slide over.
Chandler: Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to see her tonight. (phone stops ringing) Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
Ross: I have to say you are a much bigger person than I am. I mean after all weve been through, I justyknow I wish I had a brother to reciprocate. Hey, if you ever want to go out with Monica, you have my blessing.
Young Ethan: Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then, yes I am. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.
Chandler: Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary... Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am *so* bad at this.
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Joey: Well, not so good. She definitely thinks tonight is the night we're gonna... complete the transaction, if you know what I...
Emily: If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them. (Looking through the envelopes.) Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
Rachel: Yeah, well, it's a Mercedes if I move back home. Oh, it was horrible. He called me young lady.
Joey: All right. But if you werent my best friend.
Joey: Yeah. I'm thinking, if we put our heads together, between the two of us, we can break them up.
Rachel: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth!
Chandler: Because if I go home, were gonna become the Bings! I cant be the Bings!
Joey: He's right, cause if you're just gonna, like, break his heart, that's the kind of thing that can wait.
Ross: You're just jealous because you couldn't pull this off. Yeah, now if you'll excuse me (getting up and taking his coat) I have a date. (As he is walking out, everyone turns and stares at him) See? (To Joey) ALL eyes on ME!
Tom: Oh, actually I barely knew him. Yeah, I came because I heard Chandler's news. D'you know if he's seeing anyone?
Rachel: If we broke up, and I lost you...
Joey: Thats it?! Even if nobody helps me I can eat that no problem. At least give me a challenge!
Phoebe: Well, I mean, then what happens if it doesn't work out?
Emily: (on answering machine) Are you thinking about me? Of course you're not, but if you are, call me tonight. Okay, bye.
Ross: Well, yeah. I cant-I cant stay here all night, and if I go in there shes-shes gonna wanna... do stuff.
Joey: I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about it myself. Chandler is my best friend, it would be wrong. Good...(He winks)...But wrong.
Phoebe: Oh, ok. How, it's been so long since you've had sex, you're wondering if they've changed it?
Chandler: Yeah, I can be a hero, I could do that. I could, I could do... I, w-w-what if, what if it attacks me?
Phoebe: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?
Lydia: Look, look at your man, Ewing. Nice shot. You know what, he couldn't hit water if he was standing on a boat.
SUSAN: You can watch our tape if you want.
Rachel: See, there's always one guy. (Mocking) "If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes." (Joey enters.)
Rachel: Please. If she said to you, "Ross, I want you on this couch, right here, right now," what would you say?
Gunther: What if you put them here. (sets the empty tray on another stack of empty trays on the back counter.)
Rachel: (upset) All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing incident... when I was little.
Ross: Joeys asking if youve just ruined the first book hes ever loved that didnt star Jack Nicholson?
Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.
CHANDLER: If I'm goin' down, I'm takin' everybody with me.
JOEY: If it's not you, this is a horrible story.
Ross: No, come on, he doesnt know this stuff. If he knew how you felt.
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
MONICA: My brother, the PhD would like to know if there's any way to treat this orally.
Ross: Look, if I can just do what Emily wants and get her to New York, I'm sure everything will be fine.
Rachel: Okay sir, um-mm, let see if I got this right. Ah, so this is a half-caf, double tall, easy hazel nut, non-fat, no foam, with whip, extra hot latte, right? (the guy nods) Okay, great. (she starts to walk away and under her breath) You freak.
MONICA: If it makes anybody feel better, then we can just forget the thing, and we'll just do the gift.
MNCA: Only if you say his full name.
MONICA: So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know if you ask him, he might take you on his Jag. [walks off]
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom) Okay. Heres a question you never have to ask. My dad just called and wanted to know if he could borrow one of your pearl necklaces.
Chandler: I know, me too. Hey! Y'know what if we went away for a whole weekend? Y'know we'd have no interruptions and we could be naked the entire time.
Janice: Well umm, I thought I was going to go back to my apartment but then I just felt I couldnt really be alone tonight. (Joey walks into view of the open door behind Janice, sees her, gets a terrified look on his face, and flees in horror.) I was wondering if I could maybe stay here with you, just I really feel that I need to be with family.
Ross: I can do that. Oh-oh, what if she gets upset?
Rachel: Oh, Monica, you think Skippy liked you? Honey, all those buys had a bet to see if he can knock you over.
Chandler: If can invade Poland, there isn't anything I can't do.
Paula: Well, you do realise the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy..
Chandler: She's really going to love this, you know? The bottom line is I want her to have it, even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her.
Melissa: Im sorry Ray-ray. I mean if I thought it happened I would say it. Maybe I passed out and you did stuff to me while I was sleeping.
JOEY: Oh we flipped for it. I got the cigar, he got the moustache. Figured if we both grew it, we'd look like dorks.
Ross: (to Isabella) Hi! Hi, Im Ross, you dont know me, but Im a big, big fan of yours. I mean, Blue Velvet, woo-oo hoo! Um, I was wondering if I could um, maybe buy you a cup of coffee? (Gunther hands her change) Or maybe reimburse you for that one?
Ross: Well, you can't know where I am all the time. Look, this marriage is never gonna work if you don't trust me.
JOEY: Yeah, if I'm willing to sleep with the casting lady.
FBOB: If... if you want to drink, it's OK with me, I've got to get used to it.
Monica: Look Rach, we have to move. I mean if they had lost, we wouldve made them get rid of the birds. Right?
Ross: Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
ROSS: If you wanna call that a reason.
Rachel: Can you not look at me when I say this? (He turns around) I thought that if I could get you here, I could seduce you.
MONICA: If you want.
ROB: Maybe if you just played some regular kiddie songs.
JOEY: [Monica walks back in the kitchen] Ok ok ok ok. Monica, we'll bring him, but only if he takes the Jaguar.
Phoebe: Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would you rather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
ROSS: Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing, ya know, giving him away.
Monica: Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise. I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls jump back up inside your body. (She shows this with her index finger, mimicking it pushing something up)
Joey: Alright now listen, you guys, we talked about it, and if you don't want to play, we completely understand.
Ross: You are not putting that on again! Marcel, OKif you press that button, you are in very, very big trouble.
CHANDLER: Well, if I was wearing your underwear then, uh, what would you be wearing?. . . You're swell.
SUSIE: Well I was thinking it would be um, kind of sexy if you wore mine tonight, at dinner.
PHOEBE: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
PHOEBE: Alright Monica, if there is something that you would like to share...
SUSIE: If you didn't have your shirt tucked into them.
Ross: Okay! Okay! But if she doesnt call, it is definitely over! No, wait. Wait. Unless, eventually, I call her, yknow just to she whats going on, and, and she says shell call me back, but then she doesnt. Then its over.
Rachel: Hello? (Listens) Um, yeah, uh, (snapping her fingers at Ross who takes the remote from Marcel, then turns off the TV) Okay ah, hold on a second, lemme lemme just check and see if see if she's here.
JOEY: What if we have to pee?
Chandler: That would be impossible to resist if you werent all drippy here. (Points to his nose.)
JOEY: If you hated the bracelet so much, Chandler, you should have just said so.
Chandler: So you understand, Id feel a lot more comfortable if you didnt tell people what happened. Yknow, Im a little Im a little embarrassed about it.
JOEY: Maybe he, uhh... drives his car on the other side of the road, if ya know what I mean.
Chandler: Because, if Santa and the Holiday Armadillo? (Ross nods) ...are ever in the same room for too long the universe will implode. Merry Christmas!
Monica: You know, I know that things could still go wrong but if they don't? If this works out, we're gonna have a baby Chandler, a baby!
CHANDLER: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. What is this for?