words in movies
Chandler: Yeah, I think that's wrong, but there's a Connect the Dots in here for you later. (To Monica) Hey, how about maroon?
Joey: All right, I'll see you in the morning.
[Scene: Joey's bedroom, time lapse. He's asleep and dreaming. In his dream he's doing the crossword puzzle with wait for it Monica!]
[Cut back to Joey in bed, he's smiling, enjoying the dream as he wakes up. Suddenly, he realized what he was dreaming about and bolts upright in bed.]
Phoebe: All right. Hold on. (She starts digging in the chair.) I got it. Nickel! (Donates it.) How much more do we need?
Chandler: Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don't serve donuts. (No one laughs.) Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? I think I can come up with something better than that.
Phoebe: Yeah, I should probably take it back. Ooh, but you know what? While I'm at the police station, I could check their Ten Most Wanted lists because my friend Fritzy has been like number 11 forever, so this could be her year! (She crosses her fingers in hope.)
[Scene: A couch store, Ross is trying to decide on a new couch for his place. He has dragged Rachel along for the trip, and she's not too happy about it. Ross is sitting on it in different ways to see how it feels. He tries to just sit on it normally, and then he tries flopping on it. One thing about this couch, it's huge. It's like twice the size of a normal full size couch. Whoever designed this thing, needs help and fast.]
Ross: (To Rachel) Yeah, I still don't know. (To the salesman who is hovering nearby) I'm sorry I just wanna make sure that I bought the right couch. I need a couch that says, "Kids welcome here." But that also says, (In a sexy voice) "Come here to me!"
The Salesman: Ohh, okay. (Laughs.) Something didn't quite add up there. (Ross stops, walks back to talk to the salesman, and in the process pushes Rachel up against a wall.)
Phoebe: Yeah that's right you are so busted. (To no one in particular.) Book 'em.
Phoebe: Save it Red! Unless you wanna spend the night in the slammer, you apologize to the tree.
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
Rachel: Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is telling Chandler and Monica how she fought crime in her own way with the badge she found.]
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
Joey: Don't worry, there wasn't any sex in it or anything. I haven't dreamt about her like that since I found out about you two--ish.
Joey: Well, okay. You were my girlfriend and we were doing the crossword puzzle. Y'know like you guys were doing last night. So, that's it. I'm in love with Monica and I'll be moving out.
Monica: Wait, Joey! Joey! That doesnt mean that-that you're in love with me!
Joey: In the dream I did enjoy the closeness.
Monica: Well sure! I'm just wearing sweats! (Looking at Chandler and slowly realizing what his point is.) But that's good that you're not in love with me, because you just want a girlfriend!
Joey: No, I don't think it's just about just getting a girlfriend. Y'know? I mean, yeah, I can get a girlfriend! Yeah, we could sit in the chair and do crosswords, but y'know are we ever going to have y'know the closeness like-like you guys have?
Chandler: Oh yeah, it's actually in my bedroom.
(They realize the implication of their behavior, stop instantly and head for his bedroom. In the meanwhile, Joey is starring at Rachel in a seductive way.)
Joey: (in a sexy voice) How you doin'?
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Phoebe is walking up and notices a car that is parked half on the curb and right in front of the door, making it difficult for people to enter Central Perk.]
Cop: Oh, I know a guy in homicide up there.
Phoebe: I'm in vice. Yeah, in fact I'm undercover right now. I'm a whore.
Cop: Who-who else is in vice up there?
Joey: Oh, I'd love too, but I got acting class. But y'know what? I guess I can blow that off, (In a sexy voice) for you.
Rachel: (laughs and pushes the chair back in) Yeah, well, y'know umm No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
Joey: Uhh, well, she's really good in bed.
(He throws his piece back in the box, runs into the living room, looks for a place to hide the pizza, finds one, slides the box under the couch, sits down on the table, and tries to quickly chew the food in his mouth.)
Gary: Okay. (He starts to leave.) So I'll come by in a couple hours and pick you up?
[The camera cuts to show the couch, which has been cut in half.]
The Saleswoman: You wanna return this couch? (Ross nods yes.) It's cut in half!
The Saleswoman: Did you cut this couch in half?
Ross: This couch, is cut in half! I would like to exchange it for one that is not cut in half!
The Saleswoman: I'll give you store credit in the amount of four dollars.
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie peeks in around the corner)
Ross: Thats okay. Shes still in there enjoying her fake party and uh, its too late to do any of the things I had planned, so
Chandler: (To Monica) Now all you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and dont talk to anyone.
Chandler: I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.
Chandler: Wow! Just like in the pros.
Mr. Treeger: What in the name of hell?
Phoebe: Oh my God, hes not even appreciated in his own time. I would give anything to not be appreciated in my own time!
Ross: The one that always stares at me when I come in?
Joey: No, an entertainment unit, with a mail cubby built right in. Its a one day job, max.
Monica: Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green! (She ignores Monica and Monica follows her out into the hall with Phoebe in tow.) It is rude to leave a party without saying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decent thing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But what youre during to me now is just plain spiteful!
Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?
Chandler: (entering, with Janice in tow) Hello!
PHOEBE: Now OK, I haven't seen it yet so, if you don't like it, well, so what, none of you ever made a video. [puts the tape in] OK.
Phoebe: No you cant quit college! No! Youre in college? Really?
Joey: Absolutely! I could be a vegetarian. Theres no meat in beer, right?
Rachel: Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
Ross: She already lives in London.
Dina: And youre my big brother! I mean, youre my favorite guy in the whole world. Im not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
Susan: So he's got a doll? So what? Unless you're afraid he's gonna grow up and be in show business.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is sitting in the living room as Monica enters.]
Joey: Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.
Joey: If the Homo Sapiens, were in fact Homo-sapien, is that why there extinct?
Ross: So I'm a pimp huh? It's okay! Look, I know that sometimes I can be a pain in the ass, but you just have to talk to me. Tell me if something is bothering you. Okay? And for my part I will do everything I can to keep my annoying habits just (Does the 'quiet down' maneuver).
Chandler: Dude, don't rub my face in your crazy single life!
Monica: Oh my God! Ross, are you in England? Was Emily surprised?
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Chandler: Are we in London?
Stevens: (coming back in) Oh, excuse me. I forgot my briefcase y'know, by accident.
The Interviewer: All right then, well have a definite answer for you on Monday, but I think I can say with some confidence, youll fit in well here.
Rachel: Um-hmm. (Joshua turns to look in the mirror and leaves Rachel staring at his ass.) There we go. There it is.
Phoebe: Oh, well, dont tell me you want to keep more of your stuff in my uterus.
Monica: So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesnt mean hes great in bed.
Mr. Waltham: In a moment, please, Im in the middle of a task. And you have a customer.
Rachel: No, youre not an idiot, Ross. Youre a guy very much in love.
(Phoebe grabs Gunther and kisses him. He then falls to the couch in shock.)
(In the meantime, Ross is trying to squeeze and push a rather large chair through the revolving doors of the Ralph Lauren building.)
Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. (He goes to put his hands in his pockets.)
Joanna: Oh great! Ill keep it in my butt with your nose. (She grabs the cookie and walks out.)
Elizabeth: Why dont you get in the hot tub and Ill meet you there.
Monica: Okay, all right, how's this? 27. Italian-American guy. He's an actor, born in Queens. Wow, big family, seven sisters, and he's the only....boy. (they all turn and look at Joey) Oh my God, under personal comments: 'New York Knicks, rule!'
CHANDLER: Hey, no, I've never been lower or wetter. I'll be fine. I'll just turn your, uh, bedroom into a game room or somethin', you know, put the foosball table in there.
Mrs. Burgin: Maybe in L.A?
Kim: Forget it Rachel! We're both so proud of how well you're doing. I'm not gonna let you blow it. In fact, if I catch you with a cigarette, you're fired. So go on, get out of here! Go on, I don't want you breathing this stuff! Go on!
Rachel: Yeah hon, it cant hurt to put your name down! I mean in if two years if youre not engaged you just dont use it.
Ross: In this life, Phoebe.
[Scene: The Medical Research office, Joey is there with Carl in the waiting room. Two identical twins come out and both wave by at the same time.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
[Chandler can't find his money in the pocket. In the meantime, another couple shows up, and Chandler turns away to look for his money]
Phoebe: (on intercom) Hey, do you need to get in? Here you go.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Rachel: Well, Joshuas coming in tomorrow and since I dont have the guts to ask him out, Im going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.
Joey: So what, like people are gonna come in and think, "Uh-oh, I'm outside again?" Of course!
Joey: Hey! You dont get a say in this!
Joey: (rushing in) Hey! Joey Tribbiani! Im here! Im here!
Ross: (laughs) Move in with me.
(Chandler crawls over to Monica and they move in to kiss, but they cant do it and back up. They move in to kiss again, and kiss very awkwardly for a second, until someone knocks on the door.)
Phoebe: Well, shes out of town so, theres gotta be something in her house that tells me where my Father is.
Charlton Heston: Who in the hell are you?
(Chandler, Ross, and Phoebe all stop dead in their tracks at the news.)
[Scene: The Animal Hospital, the guys have taken the duck in to remove the ring. Joey is pacing around like an expectant father.]
Liam: Ross! Ross! Come on! Get in here! (Ross gets pumped up.) Ross! Come on!
Bonnie: (getting up and leaving) (to Ross) Okay, Ill see you in our room.
[Scene: Kathys play, Ross and Chandler are waiting for her in the lobby after the play.]
Joey: (joining in, in his sleep) Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey! Joey!!
Monica: Hes in a different room! Hes really that loud?
[Scene: Chandler's Office, Chandler & Nina are locked in a passionate embrace. Someone knocks, so they hurriedly separate to stare out of the window. Chandlers boss opens the door.]
Rachel: Im sorry. I didntI dont come in here a lot.
Ross: Yeahoh! Hey listen umm, Emily found this wedding dress in London
CHANDLER: [looks in the fish bowl to see a fish cracker] Well that's not an, even a real fish. No, that's a goldfish cracker.
Monica: Two in a row! Youve got to use your tongues now! (They kiss again.)
Joey: Well then help me get it off! Plus, it smells really bad in here.
Joshua: (coming back in) Im sorry.
Phoebe: No-no, let me in!
Phoebe: No, you have to let me in right now!!
Rachel: In a month?
Dr. Rhodes: Wait a minute, hold it. (He goes to the door and opens it.) Johnson! Will you come in here a moment?
Ross: Great! Because Emily and I are getting married in a month!
Ross: Im just glad I brought that extra pair of socks, yknow? I used them as mittens, I didnt want to touch a thing in that last place.
Rachel: Wow, y'know if Joey and Chandler walked in right now, we could make a fortune! (Monica is straddling Rachel and holding her arms down. In a rather risqu� pose, at least for primetime TV.)
Chandler: So uh, what are you in for?
Marjorie: I talk in my sleep.
Phoebe: Okay! It's worth it, if it will get you moving. You haven't worked in months.
Monica: In like a half-hour?
RACHEL: Ooh, goooosh, ooh, these are cookies smashed in the sports section.
ROSS: No, um, see 'cause that, that is, that is the staging area. If you go in there, it'll ruin the whole illusion of the party. Yeah, I think you take your scotch back in there and I will get your cigarettes for you sir.
Chandler: What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont (shows them a brochure)!
Mr. Treeger: (coming in from the bathroom) Whoa, hey, that ladys all kinds of naked.
CHAN: All right, Pheebs, back me up here, ok? You believe in that karma crap, don't you?
Joshua: What?! (Gunther is listening in.)
Phoebe: Oh well, lost again. (She gets up and slowly moves away. The lurker scurries in and takes her spot, only this time Phoebe set a trap for her and catches her in the act.) That's it! You and me, outside!
(Ross limps over all covered in mud.)
Joey: Wow! Thats pretty nice. I thought he cut off his ear cause he sucked. What else you got in there?
Monica: Yknow what? He will forgive you. And I like to bring a pad with me when I go answer the phone just in case (Chandler gets that disgusted look back.) Okay
Ross: Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling, always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, he has a hobby.
(She goes over and lets Phoebe bounce in wearing her own wedding dress.)
MRS. GREENE: Oh, you kids [she caresses his face and chest] Well, this is the best party I've been to in years.
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
Ross: Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can't deal with it, that's your 'too bad.'