words in movies
Phoebe: Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya, its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funk on your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from a cup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
Phoebe: Its not kicking me, its kicking one of the other babies. Oh (looks down her dress)! Dont make me come in there!
Phoebe: Hey!! Get your ass back here, Tribbiani!! (Joey walks back in, scared.)
Joey: Okay, now uh, in terms of the invite list, Ive got you, me, and Chandler and Im gonna invite Gunther cause, well, weve been talking about this pretty loud.
Ross: Yeah, see, I dont think its gonna that difficult considering this one wont be taking place in the basement of a Pizza Hut.
Monica: I know! Phoebe is gonna love dressing them in these!
[Scene: Joeys bedroom, its the middle of the night, hes waking up and discovers hes alone in bed.]
Ross: Oh absolutely! It has been in my family for generations, and every bride who has worn it has had a long and happy life.
Joey: Dude, I screwed up, you dont have to turn me in!
Phoebe: (sets the cup down) Oh! (Grabs her stomach in pain.)
Joey: All right, okay, this is great, uh, Chandler, you get behind the desk. And-and when she comes in hopefully, she wont recognise you because, well, why would she? Uh, okay, and then you buzz Ross and I. (to Ross) You be Mr. Gonzalez, and Ill be uh, Mr. Wong.
Chandler: (to Ross) You be cool. (He opens the door and lets her in as they all turn there backs on her.)
Joey: There was a ring, in a box, on my nightstand, after you left, it was gone!
Joey: I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnt take it, and I didnt take it; and you (Chandler) didnt take it, then who did? (The duck quacks.) Shh! Were trying to think! (Ross and Chandler realise it at the same moment and stare at Joey, who doesnt get it. After a short pause, with the duck still quacking, Joey figures it out and starts pointing at the duck.)
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
Phoebe: Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myself into, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like I know them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these little babies have to go away.
[Scene: The Animal Hospital, the guys have taken the duck in to remove the ring. Joey is pacing around like an expectant father.]
(With that we go into a little flashback about the guys memories of the duck. The first one is Joey playing with him in the bathtub and drying him off. Then its Chandler sitting on his couch after they moved into the girls apartment, and Chandler reading to him in bed, and him watching Baywatch when all they had was the canoe and the duck was in a bucket of water. Then we see Ross eating some cereal and the duck watching him. He takes a lamp and moves the duck off of the table. Then its Chandler shooing them out of the bathroom in the girls apartment, Joey revealing their disco cubby hole in the entertainment-center, then Chandler playing Hide-and-Go-Seek with them, and its concluded with various scenes with the duck flapping its wings. And the guys staring into the distance in remembrance of the duck.)
The Doctor: (coming in from surgery) Somebody lose a ring?
The Doctor: Hes doing just fine, hes resting now, but you can see him in a little bit.
Monica: No, I cant afford this either. No. I-I-Im, Im just to figure out which one I want then Im gonna get it at Kleinmans, this discount place in Brooklyn, day after tomorrow they are having a huge sale.
Ross: It doesnt matter. You dont dip your pen in the company ink.
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Jill Goodacre is on the cellular phone. Chandler's thoughts are in italics.]
Rachel: Oh God! This is silly, Im gonna see you in a couple of hours! (They hug again.)
(Ursula turns in surprise.)
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
Chandler: Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang out with all the guys in my office.
MINISTER: You know, nothing makes God happier than when two people, any two people, come together in love. Friends, family, we're gathered here today to join Carol and Susan in holy matrimony.
Joey: (in disbelief) Vulva?
Aurora: ...All of a sudden we realised we were in Yammon.
Joey: Ok, I may not have treated your friends well in the past, but I have grown up a lot, really. Honest, Rach?
[Scene: Chandler's Office, later that day, Nina is in his office.]
[The next one is from Episode 224: The One With Barry And Mindys Wedding, Joey has to kiss a guy in an audition and has been trying to find one to practice with.]
Chandler: (The room is filled with flowers and a floral print sheet on the bed.) Oh my God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve got to be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. (Looking around the living room.) Its spreading already.
Phoebe: Mike knows I'm coming, and if I don't show up he'll think it's because of him! And I don't want to lose face! That's a very serious thing in my culture.
Chandler: It just keeps getting worse and worse! Y'know? I mean its bad enough that Im in love with my roommates girlfriendwhich by the way, I think she knows. Because every time were in the room together theres this weird like energy between us. And call me crazy, but I think she likes me too. And now I have seen her naked. I mean at least when Ive seen her with clothes on, I could imagine her body was like covered in boles or something. But there are no boles, shes smooth! Smooth! (leaves)
Rachel: Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. I'm with you. Um, but I, but I'm trying really hard. And I think I'm doing better. I really do. Does anybody need coffee? (everyone in the place raises their hand) Oh, look at that.
Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there but Chandler. Phoebe runs in, excitedly.]
Chandler: Oh! Thanks, I'm crazy about our place. Hey! speaking of crazy... do you have a history of mental illness in the family?
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
Chandler: No-no, hes not back yet, but hell be here any minute. So uh, come on in. Have a seat. Bow or stern?
Rachel: How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rolling massage, and speakers in the head rest?
Ross: You are not putting that on again! Marcel, OKif you press that button, you are in very, very big trouble.
CHANDLER: Hey, look, Phoebe I wanted to meet her in person too, okay, but she's married, she has a husband.
(Joey lets himself in, carrying a large paper shopping bag.)
JOEY: Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. [pause] You know, after having slept with her.
Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. She and David are still kissing each other in the living room.]
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Mrs. Green: Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school! If I didnt know better Id say you were a cheerleader in trouble. Come on, lets get some tea.
Ross: Oh-oh, okay, okay! (He quickly takes off his sweater in order to put on the T-shirt. Its an old Frankie says relax T-shirt, that barely fits him. Rachel nods her head in approval of the new look.) If you dont mind Im gonna the rest of my stuff, and relax, in my favourite shirt. (Starts to leave) You have a pleasant evening. (He exits and leaves the door open.)
Rachel: I'm in.
Phoebe: Yeah. Um... I'm out. (throws in cards)
Phoebe: Monica, in or out?
Ross: Oh, I am very in.
(Marcel puts a CD in the player.)
Monica: But, I put some honey in it.
Phoebe: I'm in.
Joey: Well I tell ya, I should probably buy a place in the city first. (Realizes.) And I just got what you meant againThat isI tell ya, that is a tricky one!
(Monica gets up, looks in Rachel's purse.)
Monica: Rachel, there's nothing in it.
Ross: I bet two dollars. (throws it in)
Ross: I'm in. (throws in chips)
Monica: Why do you guys have so many keys in there anyway?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Three pizza crusts, two bottle caps and the plastic tripod are left in the otherwise empty pizza box.� Mike is making hollow popping noises with his mouth.� He begins to speak, but stops and pops his lips a few more times and takes a drink.� Ross smiles as if he has thought of something to say, but then he stops and sinks back in a slump on the sofa.]
Ross: I see your twenty, raise you twenty-five. (throws it in)
Joey: I agree. I'm, like, in disbelief.
Joey: Just trying to get comfortable. I can't sleep in my underwear.
(Marcel makes a screeching noise in background.)
(Luisa nods, but then Monica and Phoebe run in)
Phoebe: Oh my God. You'd put that poor little creature in jail?
Chandler: So how's it going there in Financial Services?
Joey: Uh, aren't we kind of in the middle of something here?
Monica: Rach, that's great! It's so good that you had a good time in Greece!
Phoebe: Why would you leave your Belgian waffle in the hall?
Monica: Wow, so you guys are, you're never gonna be in the same room together? How is that even gonna work?
Monica: Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
Monica: That's because I'm in front of them.
(Barry bursts in)
Monica: This is me in The Sound of Music. See the von Trapp kids?
Ross: Uh.. uh.. Well, Joey and I had discussed getting in an early morning racquetball game. But, um, apparently, somebody overslept.
Chandler: I feel violated. And not in a good way.
Chandler: Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary... Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am *so* bad at this.
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Rachel: (in a low voice) We ended up having sex in his chair.
ROSS: I, I don't know, it's got all this stuff about wind and trees and there's some kind of sacred pool in it. I mean, I don't really get it but she's, she's pretty upset about it.
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
Joanne: Well, guess who my dad's making partner in his firm? (She points to herself and they all scream again.)
Joey: (answering the door.) Hey, how did you do that?! Come on in. (He brings them inside.)
Parker: Its a haven. A third-floor paradise. A modern-day Eden in the midst
Monica: It will not be fine. We'll get in trouble.
Phoebe: Sex in his chair.
Phoebe: Whoah, ooh, why is the air in here so negative?
Chandler: What are you still doing here? She just broke up with the guy, it's time for you to swoop in!
Ross: I just Bamboozled Chandler! (Flexes in victory while everyone stares at him.) Which is not uh sexual thing. That was a quick shower.
Phoebe: Tiger! (Joey moves his hand in an attempt to do the chord, in fact he does it with each name.) Dragon! Iceberg!! (He fails.) Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
RICHARD: Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...
Monica: Wait. He pooped in my shoe? Which one?
RACHEL: Oh, Ross, you had to, I mean, he was humping everything in sight. I mean, I have a Malibu Barbi that will no longer be wearing white to her wedding.
(Chandler enters from his bedroom, all depressed and wearing sweat pants, with the chick and duck in tow.)
Phoebe: Oh, Im sorry. Is that annoying? And speaking about being selfish in bed, hows Whitney?
Erin: I really dont think he does. And yknow what? Maybe you guys could help clue him in. Yknow, tell him Im-Im not interested in a serious relationship or something.
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
(As soon as Monica leaves the room, Chandler takes off his jacket and runs to the bathroom. Monica enters the bathroom to find Chandler in the bathtub.)
Chandler: Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.
Charlton Heston: Hello! Whos in there? (He opens to curtain to reveal a naked and wet Joey.)
Phoebe: Happy thirtieth birthday! Here! (Hands her the hippity-hop.) Its for the child in you, and the woman. Happy thirtieth!
Rachel: Oh no, not in my room! I'll get him.
Rachel: Youre right. Youre right. I mean Im about to have a baby, I can tell my mother that I dont want her to just be sleeping on my couch! Oh my God! Shes gonna want to sleep in my bed with me. This cannot happen!
Rachel: Yeah, we found them. There were in the guest room closet behind some coats.
Ross: Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age.
(They go in and sit down.)
Rachel: Honey, come on, I have to be at work in like ten minutes (Ross starts kissing her neck) Oh, all right, well it's not like I'm employee of the year or anything. (they fall onto the couch)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Young Ethan are sitting in the couch.]
(Rachel taps into view; she is in perfect sync with the rest of the class)
Rachel: OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. (throws it in)
Joey: Ahh, yes. (Pushes Rachel in front of himself so that she could do the talking.)
[In the bathroom Susie and Chandler are kissing. She backs into a stall.]