words in movies
Ross: Hey, does anybody want to get some lunch? All those in favor say I? (Pokes his eye)
(Joey howls in pain and holds his eye.)
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Joey: (entering, depressed) Hey. I just got off the phone with Estelle and guess what. (Pause, then very excitedly) I GOT THE LEAD IN A MOVIE!!!!!!
Chandler: You got the lead in a movie? That's amazing! What's the movie about?!
Joey: It's called Shutter Speed, it's really cool! Yeah, umm, I meet this girl in the subway and we fall in love in like a day, right? And then, she disappears But I find out where she lives and when I get there this like old lady answers the door and I say, "Where's Betsy?" Right? And she says, "Betsy's been dead for 10 years."
Joey: And the best part is, we're filming in the desert outside Vegas! (To Chandler) And you know what that means buddy!
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) All right! Let's get this over with! Ugh! (She walks by the table and notices that no one is looking and accidentally on purpose knocks over the open cereal box.) Ohhh! No! Look what I did! (She starts walking through the mess. {Also, notice the continuity error in this scene. Note the position of the box and dispersal pattern of the cereal before and after the camera cut.}) Oh, I mean, look at this mess! I mean, we're probably gonna have to clean this up! Y'know? We're gonna have to reschedule!
Monica: No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! All right, let's go Blinky! (She ushers Rachel out the door, but before the door fully closes she sticks her head back in.) Chandler!!!! (Chandler agrees to clean up the mess.)
Phoebe: Ooh, if you take the northern route there's a man in Illinois with a beard of bees. {Okay, I must protest this, I've lived in Illinois all my life and know of no man with a beard of bees! Wisconsin, on the other hand, might be a different story.}
[Scene: Monica's eye doctor's office, Monica and Rachel are waiting in an exam room and looking at this big white thing used to check eyes. I have no idea what it is, and if an ophthalmologist happens to know what that is, let me know.]
Dr. Miller: But your chin here. (She does so.) Now, you'll feel a small puff of air in each eye.
Rachel: I'm sorry. All right, I'll just stay in here this time. (Puts her head back.) Okay.
Dr. Miller: Okay. You've got a small, minor infection in that left eye. I want you to take these drops three times a day and you'll be as good as new.
Rachel: Yeah, no, I don't-I don't put things in my eye.
Dr. Miller: Okay then, I guess we'll see you back here in three months.
Monica: They're still in my coat.
Chandler: Yeah, listen, how cold is it going to be there? Do I need a coat or will all these sweater vests be enough? (Holds up 3 of them in different colors.)
Chandler: Hey, so where are we staying? Is the movie putting us up in a big hotel suite?
Joey: Uh no, not really. It's an independent film y'know? So we don't have a real big budget. I figured I'd just stay in your room.
Chandler: I see, but once you get your first paycheck you'll be springing a big hotel suite, right? I mean, lead in a movie, they must be paying you a lot?
Joey: Oh yeah! For every dollar Shutter Speed makes, one penny of it goes right in Joey's pocket.
Joey: Do you believe in ghosts, yes or no?
Joey: What are you talking about?! I'm the lead in a movie!
Phoebe: What's in the bag?
Monica: I am going I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)
Rachel: Wow, y'know if Joey and Chandler walked in right now, we could make a fortune! (Monica is straddling Rachel and holding her arms down. In a rather risqu� pose, at least for primetime TV.)
Joey: Let's just say there's a well-dressed pack of dogs in Ohio. Hey Monica listen is-is Phoebe there? I gotta ask her something about the car.
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
Stanley: I don't know. A week? Maybe two? The money will turn up! People will always wanna invest in movies! Hey, you're not rich are ya?
(The rest of the crew start to drive away leaving Joey sad, alone, and holding his congratulatory balloons as the song comes up again. La-la-la. See, I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain! In the desert you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La-la-la, la, la, la )
[Cut to Joey hanging up the phone in Vegas. He's wearing a Roman gladiator's uniform and goes over to join a family to pose for a picture. You see, he's apparently taken a job at Caesar's Palace.]
Monica: Okay! Okay! Okay! (She succeeds in getting the eye drops in and everyone climbs off of Rachel.) We'll see you in about 3 to 4 hours.
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie peeks in around the corner)
Ross: Thats okay. Shes still in there enjoying her fake party and uh, its too late to do any of the things I had planned, so
Chandler: (To Monica) Now all you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and dont talk to anyone.
Chandler: I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.
Chandler: Wow! Just like in the pros.
Mr. Treeger: What in the name of hell?
Phoebe: Oh my God, hes not even appreciated in his own time. I would give anything to not be appreciated in my own time!
Ross: The one that always stares at me when I come in?
Joey: No, an entertainment unit, with a mail cubby built right in. Its a one day job, max.
Monica: Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green! (She ignores Monica and Monica follows her out into the hall with Phoebe in tow.) It is rude to leave a party without saying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decent thing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But what youre during to me now is just plain spiteful!
Ross: Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?
Chandler: (entering, with Janice in tow) Hello!
PHOEBE: Now OK, I haven't seen it yet so, if you don't like it, well, so what, none of you ever made a video. [puts the tape in] OK.
Phoebe: No you cant quit college! No! Youre in college? Really?
Joey: Absolutely! I could be a vegetarian. Theres no meat in beer, right?
Rachel: Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
Ross: She already lives in London.
Dina: And youre my big brother! I mean, youre my favorite guy in the whole world. Im not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
Susan: So he's got a doll? So what? Unless you're afraid he's gonna grow up and be in show business.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is sitting in the living room as Monica enters.]
Joey: Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.
Joey: If the Homo Sapiens, were in fact Homo-sapien, is that why there extinct?
Ross: So I'm a pimp huh? It's okay! Look, I know that sometimes I can be a pain in the ass, but you just have to talk to me. Tell me if something is bothering you. Okay? And for my part I will do everything I can to keep my annoying habits just (Does the 'quiet down' maneuver).
Chandler: Dude, don't rub my face in your crazy single life!
Monica: Oh my God! Ross, are you in England? Was Emily surprised?
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Chandler: Are we in London?
Stevens: (coming back in) Oh, excuse me. I forgot my briefcase y'know, by accident.
The Interviewer: All right then, well have a definite answer for you on Monday, but I think I can say with some confidence, youll fit in well here.
Rachel: Um-hmm. (Joshua turns to look in the mirror and leaves Rachel staring at his ass.) There we go. There it is.
Phoebe: Oh, well, dont tell me you want to keep more of your stuff in my uterus.
Monica: So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesnt mean hes great in bed.
Mr. Waltham: In a moment, please, Im in the middle of a task. And you have a customer.
Rachel: No, youre not an idiot, Ross. Youre a guy very much in love.
(Phoebe grabs Gunther and kisses him. He then falls to the couch in shock.)
(In the meantime, Ross is trying to squeeze and push a rather large chair through the revolving doors of the Ralph Lauren building.)
Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. (He goes to put his hands in his pockets.)
Joanna: Oh great! Ill keep it in my butt with your nose. (She grabs the cookie and walks out.)
Elizabeth: Why dont you get in the hot tub and Ill meet you there.
Monica: Okay, all right, how's this? 27. Italian-American guy. He's an actor, born in Queens. Wow, big family, seven sisters, and he's the only....boy. (they all turn and look at Joey) Oh my God, under personal comments: 'New York Knicks, rule!'
CHANDLER: Hey, no, I've never been lower or wetter. I'll be fine. I'll just turn your, uh, bedroom into a game room or somethin', you know, put the foosball table in there.
Mrs. Burgin: Maybe in L.A?
Kim: Forget it Rachel! We're both so proud of how well you're doing. I'm not gonna let you blow it. In fact, if I catch you with a cigarette, you're fired. So go on, get out of here! Go on, I don't want you breathing this stuff! Go on!
Rachel: Yeah hon, it cant hurt to put your name down! I mean in if two years if youre not engaged you just dont use it.
Ross: In this life, Phoebe.
[Scene: The Medical Research office, Joey is there with Carl in the waiting room. Two identical twins come out and both wave by at the same time.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
[Chandler can't find his money in the pocket. In the meantime, another couple shows up, and Chandler turns away to look for his money]
Phoebe: (on intercom) Hey, do you need to get in? Here you go.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Rachel: Well, Joshuas coming in tomorrow and since I dont have the guts to ask him out, Im going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.
Joey: So what, like people are gonna come in and think, "Uh-oh, I'm outside again?" Of course!
Joey: Hey! You dont get a say in this!
Joey: (rushing in) Hey! Joey Tribbiani! Im here! Im here!
Ross: (laughs) Move in with me.
(Chandler crawls over to Monica and they move in to kiss, but they cant do it and back up. They move in to kiss again, and kiss very awkwardly for a second, until someone knocks on the door.)
Phoebe: Well, shes out of town so, theres gotta be something in her house that tells me where my Father is.
Charlton Heston: Who in the hell are you?
(Chandler, Ross, and Phoebe all stop dead in their tracks at the news.)
[Scene: The Animal Hospital, the guys have taken the duck in to remove the ring. Joey is pacing around like an expectant father.]
Liam: Ross! Ross! Come on! Get in here! (Ross gets pumped up.) Ross! Come on!
Bonnie: (getting up and leaving) (to Ross) Okay, Ill see you in our room.
[Scene: Kathys play, Ross and Chandler are waiting for her in the lobby after the play.]
Joey: (joining in, in his sleep) Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey! Joey!!
Monica: Hes in a different room! Hes really that loud?
[Scene: Chandler's Office, Chandler & Nina are locked in a passionate embrace. Someone knocks, so they hurriedly separate to stare out of the window. Chandlers boss opens the door.]
Rachel: Im sorry. I didntI dont come in here a lot.
Ross: Yeahoh! Hey listen umm, Emily found this wedding dress in London
CHANDLER: [looks in the fish bowl to see a fish cracker] Well that's not an, even a real fish. No, that's a goldfish cracker.
Monica: Two in a row! Youve got to use your tongues now! (They kiss again.)
Joey: Well then help me get it off! Plus, it smells really bad in here.
Joshua: (coming back in) Im sorry.
Phoebe: No-no, let me in!
Phoebe: No, you have to let me in right now!!
Rachel: In a month?
Dr. Rhodes: Wait a minute, hold it. (He goes to the door and opens it.) Johnson! Will you come in here a moment?
Ross: Great! Because Emily and I are getting married in a month!
Ross: Im just glad I brought that extra pair of socks, yknow? I used them as mittens, I didnt want to touch a thing in that last place.
Chandler: So uh, what are you in for?
Marjorie: I talk in my sleep.
Phoebe: Okay! It's worth it, if it will get you moving. You haven't worked in months.
Monica: In like a half-hour?
RACHEL: Ooh, goooosh, ooh, these are cookies smashed in the sports section.
ROSS: No, um, see 'cause that, that is, that is the staging area. If you go in there, it'll ruin the whole illusion of the party. Yeah, I think you take your scotch back in there and I will get your cigarettes for you sir.
Chandler: What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont (shows them a brochure)!
Mr. Treeger: (coming in from the bathroom) Whoa, hey, that ladys all kinds of naked.
CHAN: All right, Pheebs, back me up here, ok? You believe in that karma crap, don't you?
Joshua: What?! (Gunther is listening in.)
Phoebe: Oh well, lost again. (She gets up and slowly moves away. The lurker scurries in and takes her spot, only this time Phoebe set a trap for her and catches her in the act.) That's it! You and me, outside!
(Ross limps over all covered in mud.)
Joey: Wow! Thats pretty nice. I thought he cut off his ear cause he sucked. What else you got in there?
Monica: Yknow what? He will forgive you. And I like to bring a pad with me when I go answer the phone just in case (Chandler gets that disgusted look back.) Okay
Ross: Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Mrs. Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling, always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, he has a hobby.
(She goes over and lets Phoebe bounce in wearing her own wedding dress.)
MRS. GREENE: Oh, you kids [she caresses his face and chest] Well, this is the best party I've been to in years.
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
Ross: Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can't deal with it, that's your 'too bad.'
[cut to later in the same scene]