words in movies
Monica: Whatever Ross! Just replace the bulbs in the brake lights after youre done.
Ross: Look Rach if-if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche Ill be glad to take you for a quick spin around the block.
Rachel: Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader.
Ross: Did you see the look that girl just gave me? Huh? She mustve seen me cruising in the bad boy.
Chandler: I dont even know the man. Okay? Were not the close. I havent seen him in years.
Chandler: Well he doesnt have to know! Its not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
[Scene: A Street, Rachel is throwing her coat into the Porsche and getting in.]
Rachel: Ahhh! (Gets in.) Ooh, nice!
{Transcribers Note: She puts the key into the ignition, which is on the left side of the steering wheel. Does anyone know why that is? Its a tradition left over from Porsches racing history. The worlds greatest endurance race is the 24 Hours of LeMans. Which is in France and runs for 24 hours straight from noon on Saturday through the dark of night and finishes at noon on Sunday. In the 60s LeMans had a unique start where the drivers would actually start the race outside of the car and across the track. At the start of the race, the drivers would run across the track, get in the car, buckle up, start the car, and drive off. Porsche wanted to reduce the amount of time that took. Since all cars to that point had the ignition switches on the right side of the steering wheel, that required the drivers to use their right hand to grab the seat-belts, put the car in gear and start it. The drivers left hand did nothing. Porsche in order to save a few seconds in a 24-hour race; moved the ignition switches to the left side of the steering wheel so that the driver could start the car with his left hand while grabbing the seat-belts with his right hand. Thats why every Porsche car built since then has the ignition on the left side of the steering wheel.}
Rachel: Look Ross, if youre so freaked out, just get in the car!
Ross: (grabbing the car) Okay! Okay! Okay! (He gets in, but into the back seat.)
Rachel: What are you doing?! Get in the front!
Ross: In the death seat?!!
Phoebe: What? (He leans in to kiss her.) Oh. (They kiss and Phoebe pauses.) Ooh. (Pause) Whoa! That one kept going. (Exits.)
Monica: Here! (She sets a bag down in front of him.)
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
Joey: Oh yeah, he looked like a real lumberjack in those pink laceys.
Phoebe: Im just saying that only a man completely secure with his masculinity could walk around in womens underwear! I dont think you could ever do that.
Ross: Okay, stay calm. Nothing is going to happen to you, you are not in that much trouble.
A Waiter in Drag: (to Chandler and Monica) Has someone taken your order yet?
Waiter in Drag: (To Chandler) Hm-mmm?
Waiter in Drag: Youre straight. I get it. (Walks away.)
Chandler: I dont know if Ive told you this, but hes kinda tried to get in contact with me a lot over the last few years
Chandler: Yeah, hes made phone calls, written letters, he even came to New York, but I always said I was too busy to see him. Yknow its all very Cats in the CradleI dont want to get into it. (The show starts.) Here we go.
Policeman: And in the meantime you better let him drive. Does he have a license?
Helena: (singing) For Im loved by a pretty wonderful boy! (Applause.) Hello! And welcome to the show. I see some of our regulars in the audience. And a couple of irregulars. (He starts going into the audience.)
Helena: (to Chandlers back) Oh look, a standing ovation already! So early in the show. Oh turn around honey; let me see your pretty face. (He slowly turns around. Helena recognizes him.)
Monica: (looks at Chandler) In in two weeks.
Helena: Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groom how lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall. Fortunately, in my life (Four guys wearing rubber boots, shorts, hats, and nothing else carrying umbrellas run onto the stage.) (Singing) Its raining men!
Pete: Y'know I have a torn rotator cuff, a hairline fracture in my right forearm, and a severely bruised Adams Apple, but that really hurt.
Phoebe: Umm, well I sorta have some bad news, can I come in?
(He goes to pull up his pants, but can't seem to get them past his knees. He frantically tries to pull them up to no avail. Panic sets in.)
Ross: I know where Joey would be. He would be down in the foxhole protecting all of us.
Phoebe: Nope. (Chandler nods in agreement.)
Parker: That sounds great. (Sits down) My God this is the most comfortable couch Ive ever sat on in my entire life. (Bounces on couch)
Matt: It tastes like (mimicking him in a high-pitched voice) feet!
Joey: All right! Westminster Abbey! Hands down, best Abbey Ive ever seen. Hey! (Pushes Chandler in front of the camera.) Okay. What do you think of the Abbey, Chandler?
Chandler: Hey ladies! What are you in here for? (Laughs at his joke.)
Chandler: Yeah, I think I do! Y'know what? You move in with her! You move in with her right now! Maybe I should in with Monica!
Ross: Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine. (A woman emerges from the toilet behind him and he tries to pretend he was in the other one)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross is lamenting to Chandler and Rachel about his troubles in his new building.]
Joey: Yeah, we haven't dropped it in (Looks to Ross.)
Phoebe: Well, if you don't... if you don't hold it in, you don't get all the nutrients.
(Rachel runs over and answers the phone with the blender in hand.)
Chandler: Rachel got Ross the tuxedo that Val Kilmer wore in Batman. Okay Batman is so much cooler than James Bond!
Gary: I want you to move in with me.
Phoebe: We're moving in together! Isn't it great! Yay!
Monica: So you're moving in with him. What happened?
[Scene: Joeys in the front entrance watching for Rachel. The bridesmaid he met at the rehearsal dinner come in.)
[Sequence 1: Monica throws the ball over Chandlers head to Joey who catches it for a touchdown, and starts to dance in celebration. Chandler then tackles him, and he starts to dance in celebration.]
Phoebe: No, I really wanna live with you! I wanna move in with you!
Colleen: Everything is broken down into categories, and then cross-referenced, and then colour-coded to correspond with the forms in the back.
Rachel: Phoebe! It's 6 o'clock in the morning! Why aren't you at Gary's?
Chandler: (trying on the jacket) Okay. Holy double-vented comfort Batman! (Finds something in the pocket) Whats this?
Joey: Yeah? Well look Ross, you don't have to. Okay? It's not your fault I suck. I mean what kind of an actor can't even say, "Hmm, noodle soup." (Nods his head in disgust.)
Chandler: Well, I heard that you thinking about asking Phoebe to move in with you and I thought maybe, we should have a talk. Man to uh, me.
Ross: This is a girl that I really like and had too swoop in there!
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
Ross: Hello! I'm in the front seat, okay? I'm Gary's partner!
Cop: Oh, I know a guy in homicide up there.
(The guys hotel room. Joeys there. Chandler comes out of the bathroom in a robe.)
Gary: So you uh, you checked the paper for listings in Brooklyn Heights, right? You-you checked the Post?
Monica: They're still in my coat.
Chandler: Hey, yknow what? Why dont we think about changes we can make in the living room?
Rachel: Y'know, I know it's totally superficial and we have absolutely nothing in common, and we don't even speak the same language but Goooooooddddddd....
Chandler: I see, but once you get your first paycheck you'll be springing a big hotel suite, right? I mean, lead in a movie, they must be paying you a lot?
Ross: But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guess who's in charge of the dig.
[Scene: Silvercup studios, Joey is taking a shower in Charlton Hestons dressing room. Heston enters the room, Joey panics, and walks over to the shower and confronts Joey about the use of his shower.]
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we said we dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
Phoebe: (to Rachel, whos staying in the cab.) Arent you gonna go?
Phoebe: No, as soon as something opens up we'll move right in. Unless it doesn't have a pool, I need a pool. (Turns away from him.)
Phoebe: What's in the bag?
JOEY: [as they're walking out, Dr. Greene questioningly gestures at the Happy Birthday sign over the door] This is clearly in the wrong apartment. [they all walk across the hall]
Monica: Rachel! What is your cat doing in one of my bowls!
Rachel: Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?
Chandler: Well, as long as the pilgrims didn't eat it, I'm in.
Gary: Let me tell you what I think might be going on. (Phoebe looks down in shame.) No-no-no, don't look at the table. Look at me. (Points to his eyes and she does so) Okay, I think somebody asked someone to move in with them. And I think someone said, "Yes" but now she's having doubts because things are moving to fast for someone. Does that sound at all possible to you?
Rachel: Oh, oh, and hey-hey-hey, those little spelling tips will come in handy when youre at home on Saturday nights playing Scrabble with Monica!!
Chandler: Well, Ive got a girl in here.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is sitting in the living room and Phoebe is standing in the kitchen as the phone rings.]
Monica: Okay, well, why don't we all meet upstairs in an hour?
Ross: (on the phone) Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room? (pause) Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already? (pause) Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
Chandler: Umm maam, do you have a minute? (She points for him to come in) I kind of have some bad news. I dont think I can move to Tulsa.
Joey: Do you believe in ghosts, yes or no?
Joey: (entering, limping, and holding his arm) I dont like this anymore. (He sits down with them in pain.)
Chandler: Okay, I get it. So, I get nothing! Nothing here is mine! Everything here is yours! Ill get up in the morning put on your clothes, and head off to work!
Joey: Well, hey! Well... (he takes his mug to toast Phoebe) Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world! To Phoebe and... (a bit uncertain) I wanna say Mike? (pause) To Phoebe and Mike!
(Rachel throws the alcohol in the fire. A burst of flames shoots up from it.)
Phoebe: (no accent) Uhm... Okay, well, allright, uhm... Originally I'm from upstate, but uhm... then my mom killed herself and my stepdad went to prison, so... I just moved to the city where uhm... I actually lived in a burned out Buick LeSabre for a while... (frowns are received) which was okay, that was okay, until uhm... I got hepatitis, you know, 'cause this pimp spit in my mouth and... but I... I got over it and uhm... anyway, now I'm uhm... a freelance massage therapist, uhm... which, you know, isn't always steady money but at least I don't pay taxes, huh... (everyone in the room finds it a bit surreal, which Phoebe realises and starts to talk in the accent again) So... where does everyone summer?
Rachel: Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden my hair got tangled in the chain. And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut a big chunk of my hair! (crying) And it was uneven for weeks!
Ross: May I come in?
Joey: Oh yeah! For every dollar Shutter Speed makes, one penny of it goes right in Joey's pocket.
Phoebe: (sits down) Yeah, I feel great. 'Cause we're moving in together.
Phoebe: Joey stuffing 15 Oreos in his mouth. (Joey, with an obvious mouth full, nods yes.)
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Chandler: In the game room!
Stevens: Im telling you, I need some smacks. I got a kid starting Dartmouth in the fall.
Ross: This is crazy! I mean, yes-yes Rachel is my good friend and I-I have loved her in the past, but now, she is just my wife! Phoebe, will you-will you help me out here?
Ross: Oh! You are gonna love it! (The girl is looking in the other direction as Ross is taking off his own coat, revealing the pink and white ladies shirt) and I'm so glad, we're finally doing this.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is standing in the doorway, not wanting to participate in the festivities.]
Monica: Oh, hang on, hang on. Does Aunt Monica get a say in this?
Ross: I think the check in is that way. (Points)
Monica: (handing him a pad of paper and a pen) Lets just do it right now. Okay? It wont be hard. Just say whats in your heart. (She goes back, sits down, and starts feverishly writing.)
[Scene: Rehearsal dinner hall. Ross and Emily are standing in the reception area. Monica arrives with her parents.]
Ross: (to Rachel) So, hes just a nice guy. You really think this Mark doesnt want anything in exchange for helping him?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are dressing up Ben in the entire rain suit from Rainy Day Bear.]
Monica: Find some! Please! Anything that doesnt say I-I died tragically in France. (Joey leaves to find clothes.)
Phoebe: Fine, all right, mine had a dwarf that got broke in half, but y'know whatever.
(Rachel decides not to confront them and starts to walk out, knocking over a lamp in the process.)
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
Ross: I, uh, I'll go see. (He goes in)
Emily: I mean, I can't-I can't be in the same room as her! It drives me mad just thinking of you being in the same room as her!
Ross: (he puts it in his mouth) Nope! Something else. (Throws it back under the bed.)
(Tim leans in to kiss her. They stop, and when he tries to kiss her again, Monica pulls away.)
Phoebe: Im so jealous youre all going! I cant believe I never knew that you cant fly in your third trimester!
[Scene: A Union battlefield hospital, Phoebe, in a past life, is tending to a wounded Union soldier. (By the way, for historical perspective, 1862 was the second year of the American Civil War.)]
(Ross throws his hands out in a What are you doing? gesture)
Joey: The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limesHey, what was in that brown jar?
Ross: Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living in my building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want. (Rachel looks at him.) With your permission.
Phoebe: Yeah, if you get married in Vegas, youre only married in Vegas.
Rachel: Ohhh! (Looks in the mirror and sees that she still has her mustache and groans.)
Janice: No-no-no, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on our day in the sun.
Ross: Why are we in bed together?
[Scene: Rachel's new job, she's in her new boss's office (Kim's) and with the other assistant (Nancy). Together they're deciding what clothes to buy or something, who knows, let's all watch/read to find out.]
Monica: (in the kitchen with Chandler) Look at them, they're-they're panicked!
Paul: Okay. Ill give you one chance to change my mind. (Ross laughs in relief) You got one minute. (Ross suddenly gets worried.)
Chandler: Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love with Carol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Minister: As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, till death parts us.