words in movies
Monica: Whatever Ross! Just replace the bulbs in the brake lights after youre done.
Ross: Look Rach if-if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche Ill be glad to take you for a quick spin around the block.
Rachel: Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader.
Ross: Did you see the look that girl just gave me? Huh? She mustve seen me cruising in the bad boy.
Chandler: I dont even know the man. Okay? Were not the close. I havent seen him in years.
Chandler: Well he doesnt have to know! Its not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
[Scene: A Street, Rachel is throwing her coat into the Porsche and getting in.]
Rachel: Ahhh! (Gets in.) Ooh, nice!
{Transcribers Note: She puts the key into the ignition, which is on the left side of the steering wheel. Does anyone know why that is? Its a tradition left over from Porsches racing history. The worlds greatest endurance race is the 24 Hours of LeMans. Which is in France and runs for 24 hours straight from noon on Saturday through the dark of night and finishes at noon on Sunday. In the 60s LeMans had a unique start where the drivers would actually start the race outside of the car and across the track. At the start of the race, the drivers would run across the track, get in the car, buckle up, start the car, and drive off. Porsche wanted to reduce the amount of time that took. Since all cars to that point had the ignition switches on the right side of the steering wheel, that required the drivers to use their right hand to grab the seat-belts, put the car in gear and start it. The drivers left hand did nothing. Porsche in order to save a few seconds in a 24-hour race; moved the ignition switches to the left side of the steering wheel so that the driver could start the car with his left hand while grabbing the seat-belts with his right hand. Thats why every Porsche car built since then has the ignition on the left side of the steering wheel.}
Rachel: Look Ross, if youre so freaked out, just get in the car!
Ross: (grabbing the car) Okay! Okay! Okay! (He gets in, but into the back seat.)
Rachel: What are you doing?! Get in the front!
Ross: In the death seat?!!
Phoebe: What? (He leans in to kiss her.) Oh. (They kiss and Phoebe pauses.) Ooh. (Pause) Whoa! That one kept going. (Exits.)
Monica: Here! (She sets a bag down in front of him.)
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet. Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearing speedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into the stands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
Joey: Oh yeah, he looked like a real lumberjack in those pink laceys.
Phoebe: Im just saying that only a man completely secure with his masculinity could walk around in womens underwear! I dont think you could ever do that.
Ross: Okay, stay calm. Nothing is going to happen to you, you are not in that much trouble.
A Waiter in Drag: (to Chandler and Monica) Has someone taken your order yet?
Waiter in Drag: (To Chandler) Hm-mmm?
Waiter in Drag: Youre straight. I get it. (Walks away.)
Chandler: I dont know if Ive told you this, but hes kinda tried to get in contact with me a lot over the last few years
Chandler: Yeah, hes made phone calls, written letters, he even came to New York, but I always said I was too busy to see him. Yknow its all very Cats in the CradleI dont want to get into it. (The show starts.) Here we go.
Policeman: And in the meantime you better let him drive. Does he have a license?
Helena: (singing) For Im loved by a pretty wonderful boy! (Applause.) Hello! And welcome to the show. I see some of our regulars in the audience. And a couple of irregulars. (He starts going into the audience.)
Helena: (to Chandlers back) Oh look, a standing ovation already! So early in the show. Oh turn around honey; let me see your pretty face. (He slowly turns around. Helena recognizes him.)
Monica: (looks at Chandler) In in two weeks.
Helena: Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groom how lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall. Fortunately, in my life (Four guys wearing rubber boots, shorts, hats, and nothing else carrying umbrellas run onto the stage.) (Singing) Its raining men!
Joey: I wish. No. After dinner, me, her, and Pepper all fell asleep in front of the fire. Well I woke up in the middle of the night and I saw that the fire was dying out. So, I picked up a log and threw it on. Or, at least what I thought was a log.
Courtney: This particular time when he continued to fall or yknow, try not to fall, I was in the room with Matthew and Matthew was like, "Should I do it?"
Ross: I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got in my face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!
Richard: Shes not here and please come in.
Phoebe: (sets the cup down) Oh! (Grabs her stomach in pain.)
Ross: Nono, me neither. Although, uh, y'know, back in college, Susan Sallidor did.
Guy: Gotcha. (he and his helper walk in carrying the racecar bed.)
(They all leave and Joey comes back in quickly.)
Phoebe: (in a sexy voice to Chandler) Ill be waiting.
Phoebe: Its not in the apartment? (Monica gives a Come on look) Oh no. I cant believe this is happening again.
Chandler: If I'd known you guys were coming over, I would have brought more pizza. (they all burst out in a thundering laugh)
Rachel: (Grabs the phone and stars dialing) (On phone) (In a high pitch voice) Wiener, Wiener (In a low pitch voice) Wiener, Wiener!!!
Chandler: Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. You know, you have goals. You have dreams. I don't have a dream.
Monica: Yeah. The great thing about the jam plan was, I was taking control of my life. So I asked myself, what is the most important thing to me in the world and that's when I came up with the baby plan.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the living room and Phoebe is in her room.]
Joey: Okay. (he gets in the unit and closes the door) See?! I told ya!
Ross: Hey, I just realized we kinda let some stuff up in the air
(Rachel slams the door and locks it. She sits down, visibly upset. She puts her head in her hands and begins to cry. Ross comes back and is standing outside the window. When Rachel regroups and gets back up to finish closing, she sees him.)
Monica: I also, did a little something in fur. But umm, thats really just for me. (Rubs it against her cheek.) Okay. So, why dont you go into your room and try these on and well seeget a better idea of whats gonna work.
Chandler: What in Gods name is that?!
Phoebe: Yeah! And look, (Grabs the pants) see how they expand as the baby grows? (Theres a stretchy part in front.) And then after the babys born, theyre great for shoplifting melons.
Monica: So Rach! Youre the first guest at Hotel Monica! Umm, youll just have to tell me how you like your eggs in the morning. And I thought I would bring them to you, yknow, in bed. Oh, you have been through so much.
The Director: (answering the phone) Hello. Oh! Its you. Just ah, just one-one sec. (to Joey and Kate) I am going to take this call. When I continue, I hope that there will appear on stage this magical thing that in the theatre we call, committing to the moment! (He goes to take the call.)
Ross: (talking to himself) My God! These pants are burning up! (He's still wearing the leather pants.) (She snuggles closer.) Oh come on, she wants to snuggle now! What is she trying to kill me? It's like a volcano in here! (Out loud.) Are you hot?
MONICA: Wow, for a guy who's recently lost his job, you're in an awfully good mood.
Rachel: Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing in the background) (to Joey) What?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is going through her purse as Rachel rushes in.]
(Rachel blasts an air horn in his ear.)
[Scene: The Girls apartment. Phoebe is dialing the phone and Rachel runs in the door.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler comes running in. Everyone else is already there.]
Rachel: Ah thats great. No actually thats (In a sexy voice) Thats great! Thats really great! Yknow, I gotta tell ya writing, I mean writing, gets me uh, gets me kinda hot.
[Cut to Phoebe in another part of the store.]
Joey: And, a brownie! (Hands her a bag with the brownie in it.) Well, half a brownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop and I was startin to feel faint so
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
Ross: Yeah I know. (Pause) On the other hand in um, in about seven months youre gonna have something that youre gonna love more than any guy youve ever gone out with. Just wait. Wait until uh, wait until the first time your baby grabs your finger. You have no idea.
Ross: Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is once again being dragged in by Ross so he that he can try to manipulate the situation so that its best for Ross, not necessarily whats best for Monica and Chandler.]
Joey: Why would I do that? It took three guys to get the thing in there!
Chandler: Look, we're not just messing around! I love her. Okay, I'm in love with her.
Phoebe: Some guy bought it. Im sorry. I tired to stop it but they (points to the jeweler) put me in jail!
Phoebe: You'd better get back in that kitchen Monica, the garlic is not gonna overuse itself.
Joey: (recoils in horror) Women are mean!!! (Storms out.)
Chandler: Why do they put so much steam in there?!
Ross: Stupid balls are in the way. (holds up two balls)
Monica: It's in the kitchen, I'll go get it.
Rachel: (to the flight attendant who appears in record time. It was only seconds after Rachel pushed the call button was she there. Once again, more proof that TV isn't real, IRL she would've been waiting for the rest of the flight and by then Ross's pants would be dry.) Hi!
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
Monica: Okay. Man, I have not made this many cookies since I was in the ninth grade.
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
RYAN: Why aren't you at home in bed?
[Scene: Lamaze class, Ross is again on the floor, cradled in Susans lap, but now Carol is cradled in his lap, and she has a pretend baby, on her lap. The teacher is showing her class a video, which is about to end.]
Ross: Yeah, but we-we have to be at the Four Seasons for drinks in 15 minutes and then yknow, then The Plaza for dinner.
Phoebe: Oh yeahNo, she was really nice to me, but shes in hell for sure.
JOEY: Yeah, we set up a court in your room. Uh, you didn't really like that grey lamp, did you?
Phoebe: I know! You see it is stuff like this which is why (Looking down) youre burning in hell!!
[Cut too later, the moving process is progressing steadily. Monica is trying to lift a heavy box, as Rachel comes in from Chandlers bedroom.]
Chandler: So I guess we wear swimsuits in here!
Chandler: It doesn't matter. I just don't want to be one of those guys that's in his office until twelve o'clock at night worrying about the WENUS.
Ross: Oh great! That means Im stuck with, "So, we were watching you in there (Points to the TV) and you were sittin right here! Whoa!"
Rachel: Joey! Kinda in the middle of a story here!
Joey: (groans in disgust) Wow, its really long.
Ross: Yeah, which, which we have to leave for in exactly twelve minutes. All right, come on, I'll just pick something out for you.
Rachel: No. Yeah, and I know that. All right, well thank you so much for coming in it was nice to meet you.
Rachel: Ross, you know what? (looks over to the door and sees security staring at them) Okay, let's talk about it later, there comes security. (Takes her box and leaves. Ross follows her and then returns for the chair. He stands for a moment, then pushes it quickly in the general direction Rachel went into, and out of the camera's view, and then nonchalantly walks away)
Phoebe: Okay, well I think that they're in my purse. Why don't you go get dressed and I'll look for them.
Rachel: I know. (Starts to cry) Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I have so little time to do it in.
JOEY: Can we drop this? I am not interested in the guy's apartment.
Joey: Yeah, because it is slim pickings. I had this date last night: Yuck! But we should probably keep it down; she's still in the bedroom.
Joey: Oh, yknow, when we did that was when that bird was flying overhead with the fish in his mouth. Did you see it? It was gross!
Monica: (running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!
Ross: Yeah in fact, Im gonna go call her right now. And Ill make sure to tell her my friend Chandler says (He mimics the shy reaction Chandler did.)
Ross: No!! Y'know-y'know dont do me any favours. In fact, where, wheres the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? Id like that back too. Yes, I do.
Monica: Hes with Emily at a Bed and Breakfast in Vermont!
Chandler: Sure I do. In fact, I think the whole concept of marriage is unnatural. I mean look at pigs. Lets take a second here and look at pigs. Okay pigs dont mate for life. I mean a pig can have like a hundred sexual partners in a lifetime, and thats just an ordinary pig not even a pig thats good at sports!
Chandler: Yeah, Im not in that.
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
Joey: I got this pair marked excess, I gotta tell ya, there was no room for excess anything in there.
[Russ enters Central Perk. He looks like Ross, except for his chin and hair (it is David Schwimmer in a dual role).]
Phoebe: It's, I mean, it's nothing, I'm fine. It's my friends. They-they have a liking problem with you. In that, um, they don't.
Nurse #1: This poor guys been in a coma for five years. Its hopeless.
[Scene: Street in front of the London Marriott, Joey and Chandler exit. Joey is carrying a video camera and is shooting Chandler.]
Janine: Oh, sorry about that stuff hanging in there. It's just my thongs are too delicate for the dryer.
Joey: Oh uh, well I just came in for a cup of coffee to go.
Joey: Well check it out, I was with this really hot girl who just moved in right across the street!
Phoebe: Oh yeah it is! Im going to the movies and it starts in like five minutes.
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
Tag: (To her, in the Joey voice) How you doin?
Rachel: The beef? Yeah, that was weird to me, too. But then, yknow, I thought well, theres mincemeat pie, I mean thats an English dessert, these people just put very strange things in their food, yknow. [To Joey] Oh! by the way, can I borrow some Rum from your place?
PHOEBE: But, but this is my gig. This is where I play. My, my name is written out there in chalk. You know, you can't just erase chalk.
Rachel: No! No! It's just that all the people in the entire world that I want to talk to are right here.
Rachel: That-that is your make out buddy. Dont you recognize him? (Holding up the magazine in front of her face.) Oh wait. Ohh, Phoebe I love you. Kiss me please.
Ross: Phoebe, you cant massage people in my apartment!
Chandler: Ross came in forth and cried!
Chandler: (sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Rosss situation?
Rachel: Why? Is he? He is! Isnt he? Hes dating that slut in marketing!
Tag: And if that person is already in your life, you should do something about it right?
Monica: Say it louder, I dont think the guy all the way in the back heard you!
Ross: Oh come on. It's cold, it's dark, he doesn't know the Village. (Kicks a sign in frustration) And now I have a broken foot. I have no monkey, and a broken foot! Thank you very much.
Chandler: (Also very excited) That sounds more fun than the thing we were going to do in Vermont!