words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone is there as Joey enters happily.]
Phoebe: Shes made it pretty clear, it is not going to happen.
Rachel: Monica look! Look-look-look! Here is that table that I ordered. (Shows her the picture.)
Rachel: Yeah! Its an apothecary table. Does anyone even know what an apothecary is?
[Scene: The Hallway between the apartments, Joey, Janine, Chandler, and Monica are returning from a double date. Chandler is telling a joke.]
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Rachel is placing CDs into her antique apothecary table as Phoebe returns home.]
Phoebe: Wow! Oh you can just imagine that this is where (Shes opening and closing the drawers) they kept all the stuff to make their potions.
Phoebe: Well, what period is it from?
Rachel: Yes! That I know, this is from White Plains.
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Rachel is entering as Ross comes out of the kitchen carrying popcorn.]
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
[Scene: Joey and Janines, Joey is pacing around as Chandler and Monica enter.]
Monica: The dinner will be ready in twenty minutes. This is so exciting.
Chandler: And here is the bottle of wine for you to bring over tonight. (Hands it to him.) You were also going to buy Monica flowers but you couldnt afford it, because you paid dinner last night.
Joey: No-no, she really is sick!
Chandler: Then why-why is she going to a play?!
Monica: Joey! Why is Janine not coming over for dinner?!
Monica: Ugh, I can not believe this! I mean, who is she to judge us? We could not have been nicer to her!
Joey: I know, but dont you think the sick thing is way better than the play thing?
Monica: We didnt give you any money! (Chandler is motioning, "No!")
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Rachel is showing Ross around the newly decorated living room.]
Phoebe: (sees Ross) Oh Ross no. Be careful, that is very old! Okay? Early Colonial bird merchants used to bring their birds to market in that.
Rachel: Oh it does, it does! It is a room separating apparatus from Colonial times.
Ross: Hmm, a lot of this stuff is from Colonial times. Hey, what are some other time periods Rachel? (She glares at him.)
Rachel: Yeah, yknow what? Dont look at it. (Realizes the display is their living room) Seriously, dont look at it. (Tries to pull Phoebe away.)
Phoebe: That fan kinda looks like ours. And the birdcage and the wait a sec! This is our exact living room!
Rachel: No! No! No! No its not! No its not! Come on! Phoebe, ours is totally different! I mean we dont have the (Looks desperately for something different.) We dont have the that lamp! And-and that screen is yknow, on the other side.
Phoebe: Oh my God. This is where you got all our stuff, Pottery Barn! Oh my God!
Phoebe: No-no-no, but I am mad! I am mad! Because this stuff is everything that is wrong with the world! And its all sitting up in my living room and all I can think about is how I dont have that lamp!
Phoebe: But at least the apothecary table is real.
Chandler: And Im blah? Listen, the only thing more boring than watching modern dance is having to listen to you talk about it, (Imitating her) "Oh Chandler, I just lost myself in the moment."
Janine: Yknow, I know youre talking, but all I hear is, "Blah. Blah. Blah-blah-blah."
[Cut to the hallway, Janine is entering as Monica is taking out the garbage.]
Phoebe: And so engaged. (Points to the ring that Rachel is wearing.)
Phoebe: So whose ring is it?
Rachel: Oh Im sorry. I I-I dont meanI didnt mean to stifle you. I This is all just a little overwhelming.
Phoebe: Is it an engagement ring?
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Oh my God!! That is like the third most prestigious soap opera award there is!
Janice: Okay, you know, one of two things is happening here. Either you're seeing somebody behind my back, which would make you the biggest jerk on the planet. Or, else you're pretending that you're seeing somebody, which just makes you so pathetic that I could start crying right here in the cereal aisle. So like which of these two guys do you want to be? (another guy walks by)
[Scene: Chandlers Office Building, Chandler is walking by the elevators and sees Bob standing there.]
Mr. Geller: Youre right, youre right. This is about your positions. Now, what I saw in the closet is not the optimum position for conceiving a child, although it might feel good.
[Scene: Rachels Room, Monica is entering.]
Monica: Is he crazy?! You just had Rosss baby!
[Scene: An Office Building, Chandler is on his interview.]
Monica: Honey, the question is do you really want to marry Joey?
[Scene: Rachels Room, Ross is entering.]
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
Joey: Well, this is awkward. {See? I told you so.}
RACHEL: Huh-huh, no act--no, uhh, that, that is basil.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
(Joey is now looking at Rachel, and since Rachels standing and hes sitting down and hes not looking at her face You get the picture.)
(The unvoiced hissing continues. In alarm, Ross and Chandler look at the monkey, who is now in some distress.)
The Director: Stop!! Stop it! You must stop! You are bad actors! This is a terrible play! Ill see you in the morning. (exits)
[Scene: Rachels Hospital Room, Ross is sitting next to Rachel.]
[Time lapse, Rachel is entering her apartment after breaking up with Tag.]
Phoebe: Its fine. I mean, this is something that youve been thinking about since you were what, 14? (Shes referring to the Halloween picture.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is setting the table for dinner as Chandler enters.]
Monica: Really! (They hug and kiss) All right? Let's forget about this going home stuff and celebrate our anniversary. (She picks up his suitcase.) Okay, this is empty.
Joey: Is he still mad at us?
[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joeys hobbies. The first one is from Episode 703: The One With Phoebes Cookies, Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]
Phoebe: Oh my God! I had the best time with Tim last night. He is so sweet! Oh, I cant wait to get sous-neath him.
Joey: Me too! Hey Rach, can I just say I think this is the best date I ever had!
Ross: Blueberry it is.
Monica: Wow, hes really not letting this go, is he?
Monica: Yeah-yeah, yknow what? Yeah, thats it-thats it, everything will be mine! Nothing will be yours! Thats-thats what I said! Oh come on, Chandler! Im talking about the barca lounger! It just, it doesnt match! Where is it gonna go?!
Rachel: Monica is Ross' sister.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is getting Rachels muffin.]
Chandler: Come on! Gary's such a great guy! Whatever the problem is, you can work it out!
Ross: What is the matter with you?!?
Ross: What?! It is?! (He tries to quickly remove his gloves, but runs into trouble and finally throws them off of his hands like a hockey player in a fight and grabs Rachels belly.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma is still crying.]
Rachel: What? Its true, my right leg is two inches shorter.
Chandler: Okay, you know how that people say that Tulsa is the Paris of Oklahoma?
Doctor: And here it is! (The baby cries.)
Chandler: The Sooner State, whatever that is.
Chandler: (hears Emma crying) What is wrong with Emma?
Joey: Hey, so how is it?
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)
[Scene: The Hospital, Joey is sitting in the lobby as Ross enters.]
The Singing Man: Oh come on! Mornings here! (Starts singing) Mornings here! The morning is here! Sunshine is here!
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Ross: Ah I had a little thing with Joey, if you think this is bad you should see him.
Chandler: Not to shabby, I got this all off myself using my wifes tools. (He takes the door off the frame and we finally get to see whats behind the green door! It is stacked, floor to ceiling, with junk.) Oh my God!
Casting Director #1: Hold it. Im sorry, the surprise is a new swing set, if you could play it a little less intense?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is eating at the counter as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, continued from before the commercial break. Monica is walking into the apartment followed by Ross and Rachel.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are reading a magazine and Ross is chatting with Mona.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is showing everyone a poster as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Yes, of course there is! Okay? I'm not insane!
Ross: Please take your time, its an important decision. Not like, say, I know! deciding to marry someone, this is about a muffin.
ROSS: Newly appointed head lunch chef who is also in charge of purchasing--
(They both rejoice; Chandler is totally confused.)
Ross: Actually Im a palian Dinosaurs is fine the drawing is not.
Joey: Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to Mike.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Marcel is hanging from Celia's hair, and she is screaming, trying to get him off.]
[Cut to later in that episode. Chandler is in his bathroom with Monica, and hes panicking on how far Phoebe is pushing him.]
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
Receptionist: Dr. Gettleman is finishing up with a patient, he should be out shortly.
Mary Ellen Wait, is your mom okay?
(The chain breaks loose from the wall, and because Joey was pushing with all his might, he propells into the kitchen, towards the table with all the food. This table has wheels underneath it, and when Joey falls on this table, he rides into the living room, with all the food falling off, until finally Joey also falls off... Joey gets up quickly, a bit agitated, and acting as nothing happened. He is covered in food stains.)
[Scene: Ross is in Central Perk. Phoebe comes in.]
Rachel: Thanks. (Crying) God this is so stupid! (Pause) How could I be upset over something I never had? Its negative?
Joey: Alright, alright, hey yknow fair is fair, (he pretends to wash his hands) if youre right, youre right, what can I say, but hey oh no! (He throws water on the guys pants)
[Scene: Ross is at Phoebe's.]
Ross: now I feel terrible this is all my fault.
Mike: what's up is Phoebe ok?
Mike: hey wait wait wait wait wait! Is that true what you said Phoebe's never had a serious relationship?
Ross looks down: No, that that is not what we're saying.
Monica:: is everything all right?
Joey: Damnit! Is there no mystery left in romance anymore!?
Joey: and who's fault is that.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachels baby shower is underway. Monica and Phoebe are working in the kitchen.]
Rachel: You guys, Im doing the best I can, anyone else is welcome to try.
[The next flashback is from The One With Ross's New Girlfriend. Chandler is telling Ross and Joey that Joey's tailor took advantage of him.]
Man: Dr. Wells is a woman.
(Monica opens the door and Mike is standing at the doorway)
[Scene: Phoebe is sitting with Mike, explaining about Vicrum.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting Monica ready for her date. The guys are also there. The door buzzes.]
Bob: I just found out this is Chandlers office! Come on Toby, give me a hand!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is standing in the kitchen ready to leave for the rehearsal dinner.]
PHOEBE: [pauses the tape] Ok, Ben, this is the part where Ernie buries Bert in the sand and can't find him. Now, I've looked ahead on the tape and he does find him again. But, ok, before that happens, there's some pretty rough goin' for a while but I think we can handle it. And, there's just the alphabet but we know that ends well so. Ok, here we go. [starts the tape again]
Ross: Oh well thats great, so I guess this is ah, this is good bye then. Huh? (picks a pad up off Rachels desk and tosses it into his box) Good bye.
Ross: So, so, is Mike coming to dinner?
Phoebe: Okay, okay. Its James Brolin. James Brolin is the father of my baby.
[Scene: Joey is back at Hayleys apartment.]
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica, what're you doin'? This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. It's gotta be like chips, or dip, or pretz...(look of realization)
Ken: That�s right. Is it true, that the reason you are here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?
Phoebe: Ooh, and treat it is. (Monica�s breasts.)
Rachel: Well, let�s see. The first one is: I don�t want to. And, you know, I�m not going.
Rachel: She is?
Ross: Anyway, suddenly I'm down field, and I realise that I'm the one who's supposed to catch him, right? Only I know there is no way I'm gonna get there in time, so I am running, and running, and that, that is when I woke up. See I, I am so not ready to be a father.
Ross: Yeah and we'd want to make sure Emma has someone like Monica who is more uh. uh discliplinarin.. someone who can be firm and strict.