words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone except Ross is there watching Days of Our Lives.]
CHANDLER: God that is good TV.
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is at the foosball table trying to get Phoebe to play a game with him.]
PHOEBE: No. This game is grotesque. Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steel bar, forced to play soccer forever. Ahh, hello, human-rights violation.
EDDIE: That's good man, when everybody knows that the uh, the capital of Cambodia is uh...
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe is singing. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are listening.]
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is there. There's a knock at the door. He answers it to see a young woman holding a fishtank.]
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
PHOEBE: Hey is this true, that you write a lot of your own lines?
[Scene: At a writer's desk. The writer is working on a script for Days of Our Lives.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment. The next script is being delivered.]
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
MONICA: Two it is. Ok, time for bed, I'm gonna go brush my teeth. [goes in the bathroom]
MONICA: Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.
CHANDLER: This is nuts. This is crazy. She came over for like two minutes, dropped off a fish tank, and left, end of story.
EDDIE: Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?
MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
RACHEL: God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was...
RACHEL: But, what you and I have is so much better. Ok, we have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. Ya know, I swear, this is the best I have ever had.
[later in the bathroom Monica is looking in the drawer, Rachel runs up]
ROSS: Good, good, good. So, is uh, was your moustache, did, used to be different?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Everyone is outside knocking.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler is looking at the screen of his laptop, shaking his head.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is sitting on the sofa, eating a cookie.]
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Dr. Green: Ill never understand you lesbians. (To Rachel) So baby, tell me what is new with you.
Richard: Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make a toast. (Everyone raises their glasses) Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
Rachel: Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.
David: Good, good, life is good...
Charlie: Hey, there's Phoebe! Is that Mike she's with?
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Monica: That is so sweet. I love you. (they kiss)
Monica: So this is it, we're really gonna adopt?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Phoebe: (entering with Rachel) and I-I can't take it! Y'know? I'm just, always afraid one of them is gonna catch me with the other one. It's making me crazy.
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica and Chandler are returning and Monica finds her basket is empty.]
Charlie: Wow! This place is beautiful!
Ross: Wow! This is very flattering, uh...
Joey: I would, but this is a nice place and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvin doing Hobbs.
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Monica: This is Rachel. I mean, what are you gonna do, never going to talk to her again? I mean I know its weird, its awkward, but you gotta at least try.
[Scene: The theater. Chandler is sitting in the otherwise empty front row, looking around nervously]
David: Mike is your ex... uh... boyfriend!
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
Rachel: Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
Monica: Do you really think marrying someone else is the right answer?
[Scene: Ross's hotel room. Ross and is reading his keynote speech to Charlie from his laptop]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is pouring wine for her boyfriend, Dr. Roger.]
Charlie: Actually the wet season is June to December.
Chandler: Well, it didn't say "This is a virus"!!
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Ross: I don't think that your monologue from Star Wars is gonna help me right now, Joe!
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Mike: Who is this?
Chandler: Phoebe is going to say "yes"? That's, that's great!
PHOEBE: Chandler, you gotta stop staring at the door. It's like a watched pot, you know if you keep looking at it then the door is to, never gonna boil. I think what you have to do is try not to...
Joey: Kate Miller it is. (he picks up the Kate Miller badge and sticks it on Rachel's breast)
PHOEBE: I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922?
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
[Scene: Ross's room. Charlie is sitting on the bed, while Ross is walking up and down nervously]
Chandler: Oh, listen. If this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. Really. Nothing at all. Really. (Chandler tries to hide a rubber chicken from the woman.) Nothing.
Charlie: Oh my God, this is so cool!
Joey: Tell me who it is.
Joey: (eagerly) Yeah, who is that?
Rachel: Oh! (pause) Ok. Ok, you really wanna know who it is?
Charlie: Oh, ah, isn't there another professor that is supposed to come with us?
Monica: The sun is out!
[Scene: Conference room. Ross is making his keynote speech]
Chandler: Ladies? Ross's speech is in 45 minutes.
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Jay Leno: (on TV) ...Now what is this about you-you being arrested i-in London? What is that all about?
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
[Scene: At the Spa, Phoebe is at the half-opened door]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
Charlie: ... is it weird that it's not with each other?
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Rachel: (worried) What, is everything ok?
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. She is watching the Weather Channel on TV.]
Chandler: Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonna be somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? Its over.
Joey: (sitting up again) I'm telling you, Rach, Charlie is not right for me!
Monica: Well I guess there is no harm in telling you now, Rachel and Ross are gonna have a baby.
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Joey is standing at the door, facing Rachel]
Rachel: Yeah, he did! (smiling) Oh, see, this is what I'm talking about!
Ross: No!! Y'know-y'know dont do me any favours. In fact, where, wheres the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? Id like that back too. Yes, I do.
Joey: Me too. Yeah, this place is great. I'm so happy for you guys. Although, you know, I hope you like fungus.
Susan: Honey, relax. Ross is great with him. (Ross looks at her.) Don't look so surprised. I'm a lovely person.
David: Yeah, well, being a failed scientist doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's uhm... one seventieth of a karat. And the clarity is uhm... is quite poor.
Phoebe: Is that Ross?
(Phoebe starts to listen at the other wall, where Rachel's room is. There, Joey and Rachel are kissing.)
Phoebe: Yeah, you're right. This is none of our business.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the fridge. Joey isnt doing all that well.]
[Time Lapse: Rachel is returning from chasing down the boy in the cape.]
Charlie: uhm... Is everything okay?
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Ross: You know where Joey is?
Ross: Is everything okay?
Rachel: Yeah, sure... (looks outside into the corridor if Joey is there)
Phoebe: Shhh... This is the listening side of the wall.
Phoebe: Now, what is this?
Joey: Is he gone?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's. Emma is in her bed and Ross and Rachel are rapping and dancing for her.]
Joey's voice, but she sees Ross: Seriously... What is it?
Rachel: Plus, you know, he is with Charlie now.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, continued from earlier, everyone is now in the living room drinking champagne.]
Mr. Oberblau: (seeing her) Oh, you're back... (to Ross) this is my wife, Nancy.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler has a box of keys and is trying them on the secret closet when someone enters.]
Chandler: Well look, it's not easy to spend this much time apart, you know. She's entitled to be a little paranoid... or, in this case: right on money! ... You know, she's amazing, and beautiful, and smart, and if she were here right now, ...she'd kick your ass. Look, you're a really nice person... ham stealing and adultery aside. But, what I have with my wife is pretty great, so nothing is ever gonna happen between us.
Mike: Is it ok if I hug you now?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe and Rachel are in the kitchen as there is a knock on the door. Rachel answers it.]
(Ross walks to the back of the plane, where Rachel is.)
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
Joey: All right. Uhh, okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. Why dont you tell us a little something about you Ross?
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, Rachel is entering carrying two glasses of wine. She gives one to Phoebe, keeps one, and completely ignores Monica.]
Rachel: What? What is it?
RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the fattest man in the whole damn town?
Rachel: Wow! Well, clearly this is not a good time.
Precious: My name is Precious.
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Joey: Argh-argh!! (Catches the coat.) Ooh, soft. Is this mink?
Precious: He proposed to you? This is the worst birthday ever. (she starts to cry again)