words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, 3:02 A.M., Chandler is up. There's a knock on the door and Chandler answers it.]
Joey: Monica? What time is it?
Monica: Well that's because you always sleep to noon, silly! This is what 9 looks like.
Chandler: I'm not in charge of where the conference is held. Do you want people to think it's a fake conference? It's a real conference.
Ross: Is Rachel here? I gotta talk to her.
Monica: Wow, so you guys are, you're never gonna be in the same room together? How is that even gonna work?
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, Chandler is trying to listen through the door.]
(Joey is bent over at the waist and is looking for something under Monica's bed.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is trying to tell Rachel about Emily's ultimatum again.]
Ross: You're nose is bleeding!
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's weekend, a hotel clerk is showing them their new room.]
Monica: This is a garden view room, and we paid for an ocean view room.
Chandler: (watching TV, in fact, ER is on.) Nothing! It's over! Dammit! This is regularly scheduled programming!
Monica: We're supposed to uh, be spending a romantic weekend together, it-it, what is the matter with you?
Chandler: I just want to watch a little television. What is the big deal? Geez, relax mom.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is reading a magazine and has two tissues stuck up her nose in an attempt to stop the bleeding and as she hears Ross enter, she quickly hides her face behind the magazine and removes the tissues.]
Ross: is for me not to see you anymore.
Ross: It's awful I know, I mean, I feel terrible but I have to do this if I want my marriage to work. And I do, I have to make this marriage work. I have too. But the good thing is we can still see each other until she gets here.
Rachel: Ohh! Lucky me! Oh my God! That is good news, Ross! I think that's the best news I've heard since Le Poo died!
Ross: You have no idea what a nightmare this has been. This is so hard.
Rachel: Oh yeah, really? Is it Ross? Yeah? Okay, well let me make this a just a little bit easier for you.
Ross: Rachel, this is your apartment.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is returning from his disastrous weekend. He throws his bag down and sits down on one of the leather chairs, but he sits on something and picks it up and throws it away.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is drinking some Alka-Seltzer. The rest of the gang, minus Rachel is there as well.]
Joey: I-I-I don't know if this falls under this category, but uh, Ross is right back there. (Points over his shoulder.)
Chandler: Okay, Ross is in the bathroom.
Rachel: (To Joey) Do you even know who Kip is?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching TV.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on couch and Rachel is getting some coffee. Phoebe keeps turning her head from to keep from looking at Rachel.]
Ross: No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see their sisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joey at Burger King. So is, is that better?
Ross: I can't believe this is happening.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is doing a crossword puzzle.]
Chandler: So, I guess this is over.
Joey: But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone!
Joey: All right! Man, this is unbelievable! I mean, it's great, but
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, minus Ross are playing Madlibs. Phoebe is reading hers.]
Phoebe: The most popular Phoebe in tennis is called the overhand Phoebe. And if you win, you must slap your opponent on the Phoebe and say, "Hi, Phoebe!"
Rachel: Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle and thoughtful he is. (Rubbing his shoulder.)
Monica: Yes... What is the end of that sentence?
Phoebe: Yes, they are expected presently. Yeah, yeah um, their arrival is in the offing.
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
[Scene: Professor Sherman's office, Ross is relating to Professor Sherman]
(Turns to look at Professor Sherman, only to discover that he is sleeping)
Ross: Come on sweetie! Youve had to work late every night for the past two weeks, what is it this time?
JULIE: So is there like a story or do they just stard doing it right. . . oh, never mind.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is scrapping gum off the table as there is a knock on the door. He goes over and opens it.]
Rachel: I know, I know, so it is just not a big deal.
Chandler: Hey! Look I brought a friend for dinner, this is Zack, from work!
[Scene: Ross and Carol's, Carol is working on something at the table and Ross is reading a newspaper on the couch.]
Monica: Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
(Monica hears that and is suddenly very interested in Zack)
Ross: Joey! Hey, I need to talk to Charlie. Is she there?
Stranger: And it is annoying when parents put their baby on the phone...
RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is sitting on his bed and the phone rings]
Monica: I think he is fine! It's just that we don't know anything real about him... we should get more information.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler is looking at the screen of his laptop, shaking his head.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is sitting on the sofa, eating a cookie.]
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Dr. Green: Ill never understand you lesbians. (To Rachel) So baby, tell me what is new with you.
Richard: Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make a toast. (Everyone raises their glasses) Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
Rachel: Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time. (She goes into Joey and Chandler's apartment, where Mr. Tribbiani is reading the paper) Hey, Mr. Trib.
David: Good, good, life is good...
Charlie: Hey, there's Phoebe! Is that Mike she's with?
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Monica: That is so sweet. I love you. (they kiss)
Monica: So this is it, we're really gonna adopt?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Phoebe: (entering with Rachel) and I-I can't take it! Y'know? I'm just, always afraid one of them is gonna catch me with the other one. It's making me crazy.
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica and Chandler are returning and Monica finds her basket is empty.]
Charlie: Wow! This place is beautiful!
Ross: Wow! This is very flattering, uh...
Joey: I would, but this is a nice place and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvin doing Hobbs.
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Monica: This is Rachel. I mean, what are you gonna do, never going to talk to her again? I mean I know its weird, its awkward, but you gotta at least try.
[Scene: The theater. Chandler is sitting in the otherwise empty front row, looking around nervously]
David: Mike is your ex... uh... boyfriend!
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe.
Chandler: David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
Rachel: Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
Monica: Do you really think marrying someone else is the right answer?
[Scene: Ross's hotel room. Ross and is reading his keynote speech to Charlie from his laptop]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is pouring wine for her boyfriend, Dr. Roger.]
Charlie: Actually the wet season is June to December.
Chandler: Well, it didn't say "This is a virus"!!
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Ross: I don't think that your monologue from Star Wars is gonna help me right now, Joe!
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Mike: Who is this?
Chandler: Phoebe is going to say "yes"? That's, that's great!
PHOEBE: Chandler, you gotta stop staring at the door. It's like a watched pot, you know if you keep looking at it then the door is to, never gonna boil. I think what you have to do is try not to...
Joey: Kate Miller it is. (he picks up the Kate Miller badge and sticks it on Rachel's breast)
PHOEBE: I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922?
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
[Scene: Ross's room. Charlie is sitting on the bed, while Ross is walking up and down nervously]
Chandler: Oh, listen. If this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. Really. Nothing at all. Really. (Chandler tries to hide a rubber chicken from the woman.) Nothing.
Charlie: Oh my God, this is so cool!
Joey: Tell me who it is.
Joey: (eagerly) Yeah, who is that?
Rachel: Oh! (pause) Ok. Ok, you really wanna know who it is?
Charlie: Oh, ah, isn't there another professor that is supposed to come with us?
Monica: The sun is out!
[Scene: Conference room. Ross is making his keynote speech]
Chandler: Ladies? Ross's speech is in 45 minutes.
Chandler: What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
Jay Leno: (on TV) ...Now what is this about you-you being arrested i-in London? What is that all about?
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
[Scene: At the Spa, Phoebe is at the half-opened door]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
Charlie: ... is it weird that it's not with each other?
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Rachel: (worried) What, is everything ok?
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. She is watching the Weather Channel on TV.]
Chandler: Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonna be somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? Its over.
Joey: (sitting up again) I'm telling you, Rach, Charlie is not right for me!
Monica: Well I guess there is no harm in telling you now, Rachel and Ross are gonna have a baby.
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Joey is standing at the door, facing Rachel]
Rachel: Yeah, he did! (smiling) Oh, see, this is what I'm talking about!
Ross: No!! Y'know-y'know dont do me any favours. In fact, where, wheres the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? Id like that back too. Yes, I do.
Joey: Me too. Yeah, this place is great. I'm so happy for you guys. Although, you know, I hope you like fungus.
Susan: Honey, relax. Ross is great with him. (Ross looks at her.) Don't look so surprised. I'm a lovely person.
David: Yeah, well, being a failed scientist doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's uhm... one seventieth of a karat. And the clarity is uhm... is quite poor.
Phoebe: Is that Ross?
(Phoebe starts to listen at the other wall, where Rachel's room is. There, Joey and Rachel are kissing.)
Phoebe: Yeah, you're right. This is none of our business.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the fridge. Joey isnt doing all that well.]
[Time Lapse: Rachel is returning from chasing down the boy in the cape.]
Charlie: uhm... Is everything okay?
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Ross: You know where Joey is?
Ross: Is everything okay?
Rachel: Yeah, sure... (looks outside into the corridor if Joey is there)
Phoebe: Shhh... This is the listening side of the wall.
Phoebe: Now, what is this?
Joey: Is he gone?