words in movies
CHAN: [slowly lifts coffee cup to his mouth] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. [slowly sets the cup back down] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. [Joey intercepts the cup and puts it down for him]. She's insane, the woman is insane. It's before work, it's after work, it's during work. She's got me doing butt clenches at my desk. And now, they won't bring me my mail anymore.
RACH: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.
PHOE: Why Scott doesn't want to sleep with me. It's 'cause I'm not sexy enough.
RACH: [obviously drunk] I mean, it's a cat, y'know, it's a cat. Why can't they get one of those bugs, y'know, one of those fruitflies, those things that live for like a day or something? [belligerently] What're they called, what're they called, what're they called?
MICH: Well, you know, there's no one way really, it's just, you know, whatever it takes so that you can finally say to him, "I'm over you."
RACHEL: [on phone] Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat who, by the way, I think you should name Michael. And, you know, ya see there I'm thinking of names so obviously, I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. [hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is answering the door in his robe.] CHAN: No, no, no, no, no, no [opens door to Monica] No. Monica, it's Sunday morning. I'm not running on a Sunday. MNCA: Why not? CHAN: Because it's Sunday. It's God's day. MNCA: OK, if you say stop, then we stop. CHAN: OK, stop. MNCA: No, c'mon, we can't stop, c'mon, we've got three more pounds to go. I am the energy train and you are on board. Woo-woo, woo-woo, woo-woo [Chandler walks out of the apartment, leaving Monica] Woo. [Scene: Rachel and Monica's apartment. Rachel is taking asprin. Ross enters.] ROSS: Hey Rach. RACH: Ahhhh. ROSS: Oh. And how was the date? RACH: Umm, I think there was a restaurant... I know there was wine. . . [Rachel looks at Ross as though she remembers something, but can't place what it is.]
PHOE: Yeah, so I said, "OK, relax please," y'know, I mean, sex can be just about two people right there in the moment, y'know, it's, if he wants to see me again he can call and if not, that's fine too. So after a looooot of talking. . . I convinced him.
ROSS: No, no it's not interesting. OK, it's very, very not interesting. In fact it's actually 100 percent completely opposite of interesting.
RACH: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?
ROSS: Not, not, not every night. You know, and... and it's not like I didn't try, Rachel, but things got in the way, y'know? Like, like Italian guys or ex-fiances or, or, or Italian guys.
ROSS: The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'm with somebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed.
RACH: And ya know what, now I've got closure. [Rachel slams the door and locks it. She sits down, visibly upset. She puts her head in her hands and begins to cry. Ross comes back and is standing outside the window. When Rachel regroups and gets back up to finish closing, she sees him. She smiles. She goes to open the door and can't get the lock undone.] ROSS: Try the bottom one. [She opens the door and they kiss.] [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler answers the door to find Monica.] CLOSING CREDITS CHAN: Monica, it's 6:30 in the morning. We're not working out, it's over. MNCA: No way, with one pound to go, c'mon. We're workin', we're movin', we're in the zone we're groovin'. CHAN: OK, I don't, I don't mind the last pound. OK, in fact I kind of like the last pound. OK, so don't make me do anything that I'll regret. MNCA: Ooh, what'cha gonna do, fat boy, huh? What? CHAN: Nothing, except tell you, uh, I think it's wonderful how much energy you have. MNCA: Well, thanks. CHAN: I mean, especially considering how tough it's been for you to find work. MNCA: Well, you know. CHAN: You know, I mean, you can't tell your parents you were fired because they'd be disappointed. MNCA: [sad] Uh-huh. CHAN: And it's not as if you have a boyfriend's shoulder to cry on. MNCA: Well no, but um. CHAN: I mean, if it were me, I think I'd have difficulty just getting out of bed at all. MNCA: Y'know, I try to stay positive. . . CHAN: So, you feel like goin' for a run? MNCA: Alright. CHAN: Because, you know, you don't have to. If you want, you could just take a nap right here. MNCA: OK. Just for a little while. CHAN: OK. [Puts an afghan over her and dances into his room]
Rachel: Oh my God, its happening. It's already started. I'm Kip.
Rachel: Yeah, it's in there. (Points to the bathroom.)
CHANDLER: Oh hey listen, don't be mad at him, it's our fault. I'm sorry we've been hoggin so much of his time.
Monica: I know, it's great!
Joey's Doctor: It's kidney stones.
Joey: I kinda feel like it's my fault.
Chandler: Well, I think it's very brave what you said.
Mrs. Geller: Yes, yes Monica is thin. It's wonderful. But what we really want to hear about is Ross's new girlfriend.
Josh: Well, it's getting late, I've got to get to the game, so I'm gonna... head.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Joey, it's okay. Settle down.
Chandler: Honey, it's us. Of course it's the shovel-killer.
Joey: I think it's going okay. Looks like he's smiling.
Phoebe: It's okay to laugh right?
Chandler: So, it's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers, and big Al calls me into his office and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor.
Ross: (on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)
Chandler: Monica, I want a baby too, but this woman is giving away her child. She deserves to know who it's going to. Monica: (realizes Chandler is right. She's almost crying) okay, right. (They hug)
Joey: Oh, it's perfect!
Doctor: I can't believe you didn't know it's twins! This has never happened before.
Chandler: Ross, it's just a sandwich!
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mush for thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey with his like teeny pizza! It's just...
Ross: I don't know. It's going to be weird not having a job for a while, but I, I definitely don't care about my sandwich.
Ross: Who needs a lease when it's family!
Joey: No! I am not a pervert! Okay? It's just I just Kinda
Monica: Yes it's true.
Monica: I just wanted to see how it's going.
Phoebe: Well, it's going okay.
Rachel: Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story.
Joey: It's not.
David: Well, just for a couple of days, uhm... I'm here to explain to the people who gave us our grant, why it's a positive thing that we spent all their money and uhm... accomplished uhm... nothing.
Chandler: Well, Joey, I wrote a little song today. It's called: Get Up.
Chandler: I know, it's beautiful. Amazing.
Big Nosed Rachel: Oh totally, totally. Y'know it's not that big of deal, we already kinda did it once y'know.
Joey: (Reading the scene set up.) Okay, it's a typical New York City apartment. Two girls are just hanging out.
JOEY: Great, well, I'm happy for ya. [picks up the orange juice carton and it's empty] Alright that's it. He just comes in here, Mr. Jonny Neweggs, with his, his, his movin' the mail and his, his 'see ya pals'. And now there's no juice. There's no juice f or the people who need the juice and want the juice. I need the juice.
JOEY: Wow, look at that. The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Max: Minsk. It's in Russia.
TERRY: Rachel, it's not that your friend is bad, it's that she's so bad, she makes me want to put my finger through my eye into my brain and swirl it around.
Monica: Look look! It's Rachel and Barry. No, don't everybody look at once!
Chandler: Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.
MONICA: Ok everybody, it's time for flan.
Steve: It's really fulfilling doing something you hate for no money. That's right. I have no money, I'm not funny, I live in a studio apartment with two other guys, and I'm pretty sure I'm infertile.
Joey: Y'know what? Make fun all you want. This is a great bag! Okay? And it's as handy as it is becoming. Now, just because you don't understand something, doesn't make it wrong. All right? So from now on you guys are gonna have to get used to the fact that Joey, (pats the bag) comes with a bag! (Exits.)
JADE: Hello, I'm looking for Bob. This is Jane. I don't know if you're still at this number, but I was just thinking about us, and how great it was, and, well, I know it's been three years, but, I was kinda hoping we could hook up again. I barely had t he nerve to make this call, so you know what I did?
Monica: No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking about running out on her wedding day. (Rachel slowly turns and glares at her.) (Realizing what she just said.) Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What's he gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! I mean, who would do that?! (Rachel again turns and glares at her in disgust.) Okay, fine, all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the same people.
Joey: Oh well, Chandler and Monica are over there and it's kinda hard to concentrate.
Monica: It's so good, isn't it?
Rachel: It's not a purse! It's a shoulder bag.
Phoebe: It's Phoebe.
Ross: It's from Ross, it's a love bug.
Rachel: Hey, don't listen to them. I think it's sexy.
Ross: I was up all night writing this really nasty letter to Emily! It was perfect and now it's all covered in-in (The duck quacks.) Actually, thanks!
Joey: Whoa, dude, look out! You almost crushed my hat! (He picks a hat up from the floor. It's one of those magician stovepipe hats.)
Joey: Well, first it's not a purse.
Chandler: It's okay, you don't have to be the best at everything.
Frank Sr.: Oh. Huh. It's huh, well it's (opens it) oh it'sew used. Umm, cool.
Phoebe: It's so obvious, why doesn't he just ask?
Monica: Y'know, Joey, I think it's time to give up the bag.
Rachel: Phoebe!! Phoebe!! It's okay!! It's okay!!
Phoebe: (playing guitar and singing) And there's a country called Argentinaaaa, it's a place I've never seeeeen. But I'm told for fifty pesos you can buy a human spleen. Humaaan spleeeeen. Olè!
Chandler: (on phone) Hey Mr. Kostelic! How's life on the fifteenth floor? (Listens) Yeah, I miss you too. (Listens) Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home, you know? (Listens) Well, that's very generous (Listens) er, but look, this isn't about the money. I need something that's more than a job. I need something I can really care about.... (Listens) And that's on top of the yearly bonus structure you mentioned earlier? (Listens) Look, Al, Al... I'm not playing hardball here, OK? This is not a negotiation, this is a rejection! (Listens) No! No! No, stop saying numbers! I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy! (Listens) I'll see you on Monday! (slams the phone down)
Chandler: Phoebe, it's me. You can tell me anything.
Joey: It's not my first time.
Ross: (very interested) Oh! like what?! (Charlie looks at him confused, but smiling) Oh I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry... it's just that this must be what regular people experience when they watch "Access Hollywood".
Young Ethan: Well it's somewhere in between. You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not uh..., well I, I mean I haven't ever uh...
ROSS: Hello. Oh hi, are you on your way ove-. Oh. No, no, I, I understand, I mean a monkey's gotta work. No it, it's no big deal, it' not like I uh, had anything special planned. Yeah OK, OK. OK, OK, bye.
Ross: No-no, it's not that, it's just I-I just moved in.
Rachel: Uhhh, yeah. But it's not obvious why.
Fun Bobby: It's gonna be an open casket, y'know, so at least I'll- I get to see him again.
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
Phoebe: Yes. Once. Yeah, a little. He kinda did it to himself. It's not really a good story.
Chandler: Where's Monica?! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Is she here?
ROSS: No, no, she's great and it's not like we haven't done anything. I mean, uh, uh, we, we do plenty of other stuff, lot's of other stuff, like uhh. . .
Rachel: They wanna know if I'm okay. Okay.. they wanna know if I'm okay, okay, let's see. Well, let's see, the FICA guys took all my money, everyone I know is either getting married, or getting promoted, or getting pregnant, and I'm getting coffee! And it's not even for me! So if that sounds like I'm okay, okay, then you can tell them I'm okay, okay?
PHOEBE: Yeah, it's just so strange. I mean, she probably woke up today and thought, "ok, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, and then I'll have my massage." Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it." Oh, but the weirdest thing was, ok, I was cleansing her aura when she died, and when the spirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
Doctor: Yeah, it's here in the paperwork we got from the clinic in Ohio.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah. Oh, but once you find it, ohh it's so worth the wait.
[Cut to Ross's apartment. Ross and Rachel are there. It's another scene from 1016 TOW Rachel's Going Away Party.]
Monica: What? It's still going on.
Chandler: Okay, yeah, I think it's really stuck now.
Joey: (To Rachel) Well look, hey, it's all your fault!
Gary: Okay, so it's a date.
[Scene: Central Perk, I'm sure you've guessed, it's the famous fight scene between Ross and Rachel.]
Joey: Hey, it's a lot harder than it looks! Okay? (Quietly) She-she-she's hurting me.
The Saleswoman: You wanna return this couch? (Ross nods yes.) It's cut in half!
Rachel: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone.
Dr. Ledbetter: I must say it's nice to see you back on your feet.
Phoebe: No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause I made you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'cause your, you know (in a high pitched voice) Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitely help you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll be like an Ursula patch.
Chandler: I need to talk to you, it's urgent!
Mr. Zelner: It's really nice to see you again.
Ross: It doesn't matter! It's my principles! We're talking about my principles!
Kim: So it's down to these two, Nancy I know you like this one and I think I agree. Rachel, what do you think?
Joey: All right! So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!
Phoebe: Hey!! (The bucket starts smoking.) The charity's on fire! Help! (Yet another guy walks by carrying a cup, which Phoebe grabs.) Oh good! Thank you, I need that. (She throws onto the smoldering fire. Suddenly the bucket erupts in flames.) Whoa! What is that?! (She sniffs the cup.) (To the guy.) It's nine o'clock in the morning!
EDDIE: I uh, I gotta tell you man, I mean, that's uh, it's kinda out of the blue, I mean don't you think?
Kyle: Yeah. It's gonna be weird.
Caitlin: It's uh, 27 dollars even.
Phoebe: I mean, well, 'cause when I was growing up, you know my dad left, and my mother died, and my stepfather went to jail, so I barely had enough pieces of parents to make one whole one. And here's this little baby who has like three whole parents who care about it so much that they're fighting over who gets to love it the most. And it's not even born yet. It's just, it's just the luckiest baby in the whole world. (pause) I'm sorry, you were fighting.
Monica: No! To take more pictures of all of us together. I mean I really think it's the best resolution because everyone will enjoy the pictures.
Monica: It's gonna be weird to watch some actor pretending to be Ben's dad.