words in movies
(They reach the desk. The bored nurse thinks she's heard it all before.)
Nurse: Fill this out and bring it back to me.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
Rachel: Well, alright, then, forget it. (Getting up to go) Might as well just go home. Ow ow ow ow!
Ross: Right, but, it is just me and the baby, so I'm thinkin' they can take us. And so I uh, hah-hah, I just heave it down field.
Joey: Oh, have either one of you guys ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it real expensive?
Chandler: There it is! So what're you gonna do?
Joey: What can I do? Look, I don't want to do anything to screw it up with Ursula.
Dr. Mitchell: ..you add a pinch of saffron, it makes all the difference.
Rachel: ..so, he said it was just a sprain, and that was it.
Rachel: What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, (spelling it out in the air for her slow friend) cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
Mr. Geller: Oh, well, I, I guess it musta been the day after you were born. We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep, and they brought you in and gave you to me. You were this ugly little red thing, and all of a sudden you grabbed my finger with your whole fist. And you squeezed it, so tight. And that's when I knew.
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
Monica: It will not be fine. We'll get in trouble.
Dr. Rosen: (Nervously) okay, but you have to admit that every time we go out... Women we meet at the hospital... It turns into...
Monica: I said we are not going to do it, okay? Sometimes you can be such a, a big baby.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Suddenly laughing) Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Ross: Good. Maybe he can switch it back.
Rachel: Okay (desperately hands the receiver over) no, you do it.
Rachel: Ohhh... (slumping in relief) Okay, you were right. You were right! This was just not worth it.
Phoebe: Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you?
(Phoebe wants to be angry with Joey, but as she watches him shaking his head in pain and disbelief, she knows that it isn't his fault.)
Ursula: Oh, wow! You remembered! (Opening it) Oh! It's a Judy Jetson thermos!
Ursula: Oh. No, no, he is so smart. He'll figure it out. (Offering to share her food) Do you want some chicken?
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Chandler: Okay... (returning to the board) ..whose turn is it?
Joey: I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under the bridge?
Joey: Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?
Phoebe: (as Ursula) If it was, would you stop hanging out with her?
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
Ross: Aqui est�. (Here it is!)
Chandler: �Pudo aver sido General Tso! (It could've been General Sal!)
Rachel: You really think it would be that different?
Phoebe: Yknow, youre friends getting married, its gotta change things.
Ross: Itll be okay Joe.
Joey: What? I dont get it.
Chandler: You really like it?
Rachel: (shocked) You let Joey drive it?!
Joey: Yeah! Yeah Monica! You listen to me, okay? And Im not just saying this because Im your friend, Im sayin it cause its the truth. Youre food is abysmal!
Chandler: Y'know what, it doesnt matter, cause she picked me. Me! From now on I get the dates and you have to stay home on Saturday nights watching Ready, Set, Cook!
Ross: Look, its just did, did you ever go to a party and think, "Would really anyone miss me if I werent here?"
Rachel: Yeah, maybe if you gave this girl a chance it would go somewhere.
Monica: Its your suitcase. Were going to Las Vegas.
Evil Bitch: See? See? It was because you were looking fat pervert!
Chandler: Does it matter?!
Phoebe: Yes! A friend of mine did it and its totally legal!
Kate: Oh, yeah. I love Jennifer Van Murrays work. Shes so brilliantly incisive when it comes to deconstructing the psyche of the American middle class.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, the middle of the night, there is someone knocking on the door and Monica and Chandler get up to answer it.]
Waiter in Drag: Youre straight. I get it. (Walks away.)
Phoebe: And then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go because you don't wanna start the new year with me if you can't finish it. (They kiss) I'm gonna miss you. You scientist guy.
Chandler: Yeah, listen, how cold is it going to be there? Do I need a coat or will all these sweater vests be enough? (Holds up 3 of them in different colors.)
Ross: Here it comes.
Ross: Well she should, it was taken ten years ago!
Rachel: I knew it! I knew it, ahh .
Rachel: Here we go. Im serving my last cup of coffee. (the gang starts humming the graduation theme) There you go. (hands it to Chandler) Enjoy. (they all cheer)
ROSS: The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'm with somebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed.
ROSS: Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
Monica: Yes smokie, that is what it was. I just can�t get enough.
Phoebe: I think its important that you do.
David: Well... just so you know... hearing it wasn't exactly a Vladnik carnival either... Can we at least hug goodbye?
Rachel: Oh is it?! (She answers the cute guys phone.) Uhh, hello? (On her phone) Yes hi, is Rachel there? (On the other phone) Yes she is, just one moment please. (To Phoebe, holding out both phones.) Its for me!
Chandler: Wait! Wait! Wed really love it if you could be there.
Ross: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y(Rachel grabs the phone and hangs it up for him.)
Chandler: I know it would make me happy, maam.
Helena: Its raining men!
Monica: Damnit! Yknow this whole time we were concentrating on watching the babies and, and no one was watching Chandler! (He does it again.)
Policeman: Youre right. It was 37. (Rachel laughs.)
Rachel: Its a different guy!
Frank: No, its okay. Were-were gonna have three kids! And thats-thats a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.
Rachel: No. Oh, oh, I guess it would be different if I were- with somebody.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Phoebe: Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! Im gonna open up my own massage place and Franks gonna help me! And! We can work it around his schedule so he doesnt have to quit school!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah! Back then yknow, we called the Great War. It really was!
Joey: Would she? (He smells something and gasps as he realizes what it is.) You ate my candy bar!
Phoebe: Oh this, well Im glad you asked. (She opens the case and removes a knife and an soda can.) Now, dont you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with an ordinary steak knife? (She efficiently cuts it in half.) Ahh! Now, I know what youre thinking
Cecilia: Oh no-no-no-no, being adored. Im used to it, dont worry about it.
The Director: I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richards last line. (Walks off.) Action!
Monica: I just, I cant believe that we made it!
(They all start thinking. Joey starts rubbing his chin, of course his chin is currently inside the turkey so he ends up rubbing the turkey. And I didn't do that joke one bit of justice. It's one of those you have to see it to get it jokes.)
Joey: Yep. Hey, what do you say we make it a double feature?
Ross: Wow! That is a good one! Wow, it looks like a, like a holiday card yknow, with the tree in the middle and the skaters and the snow.
Receptionist: (holds up her handshe is on the phone) It says to call this number if you're not completely satisfied with this candy bar. Well, I'm not completely satisfied.
Joey: All right, it wont go down any further. Its stuck.
Mrs. Geller: (shaking her hand) Its lovely to meet you.
Dr. Long: Okay, everything looks good. Here it is on the screen. (We see Ross and Rachel looking at the screen.) Here is your uterus. And right here is your baby.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry, Ross. Ill get it for you right now. And since I made you wait, Ill toss in a free muffin.
Joey: Well, when Jake did it I saw that he was wearing womens underwear!
Rachel: Oh I get it! A man duh!
Rachel: (she looks at the cake) Oh my God! Look what... you made it into a bunny. How did you do that?
Monica: Who wants it? Anybody?
Rachel: I said Ill do it!
Rachel: Ill do it.
Monica: Nobody wants to do it? All right, Ill do it myself.
Emily: Oh no, no, right I shouldnt have said married. Uh, please dont go freaky on me. I didnt mean it. Well, I didnt say it; I take it back!
Phoebe: (To Chandler) Check it out! Cup hat! (Points to her hat.) Cup banner! Cup chandelier! And the thing that started it all, the cup! (Holds up one.)
Joey: Thanks! Okay-okay check it out! (Reading from the script) Picture? What picture? (He pauses then spits) Eh?
Phoebe: Its amazing! My headache is completely gone! What are those pills called?
Ross: Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreed that it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
Phoebe: Plus, it totally ruined my schedule! I I havent done any of the things I wanted to do by the time I was 31!
Rachel: Im sorry. Im sorry. Its just Its just so sad!
Ross: Look, I don't care it starts at eight, we can't be late.
(Phoebe reaches into the trash can, pulls one out, and hands it to Rachel.)
Chandler: Oh! Oh! That's so hard. (Starts to juggle the ball, but loses control and almost drops it and hands it to Monica.)
Ross: Yknow actually it does have a very interesting history. Uh, this street is the first street in the city to have an underground sewer system. (Kristen crinkles her nose at that.) Before that sewage and waste would just flow right down the street. Yeah, sometimes ankle deep! (He stops when he realizes what hes talking about.)
Rachel: (To Chandler) Im telling you its like watching Bambi learn how to walk.
Phoebe: But I don't think I can! it was ok to move in when I didn't know what was gonna happen, but I can't move in knowing that nothing is ever gonna happen.
JOEY: Well, the part's mine if I want it.
Monica: Yeah! And if, and if we have a baby one-day, and the doctor hands it to you in the delivery room and you dont cry, so what! And-and-and, and if we take him to college and come home and see his empty room for the first time, and you got nothing, it wont matter to me.
Joey: Its not on my head.
Joey: All right, all right, all right. (Starts to leave, stops, and turns around) I mean Ill have to check with him first, but Ill think hell be cool with it. (Monica shoos him out.)
Rachel: He didnt turn me down! Hes at the game isnt he? I got the date, Im just not on it!
Ross: Umm, he said he thought I was funny. So (Rachel stares at him.) Okay, look-look umm, let's just go downstairs, we'll have some fun, and you will forget all about it.
(they sit down and Roy plays "You Make Me Feel" by Sylvester on his boom box, and starts... With his back towards the girls, he starts waving his hands, then backs towards the girls slapping his butt, then swings it around, and makes thrusting pelvic movements in front of Phoebe. He dances around the tables in between all the girls, and gets back into the kitchen part of the room. He then tears off one of his sleeves and throws it towards Monica and Rachel, who fight over who gets it. He then tears off his other sleeve and moves it back and forth between his legs, getting closer to Phoebe.)
Monica: Im fine now, but it was really scary there for a while. I mean, someone slipped a-a threatening note under the door.
The Director: Lets take it from there.
Richard: (To Joey) Are you a little off today? Its going terribly slowly.
(The phone rings and Rachel answers it.)
Ross: Look lets not make a big deal out of this! It was a one time thing. It doesnt even matter!
Monica: It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, if I have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's just stupid.
Agency guy: So, these are the preliminary forms for an open adoption. There's a lot to go over, but I'll explain everything as we go through it.
Monica: Hey, it is unreasonable to expect a child to wait for a light bulb to cook brownies! (She goes to the attic.)
Chandler: There's a tape here with Monica's name on it.
Phoebe: Oh! Here it is! (Noticing it next to the door.) Ooh, Joey! Why did you sign it, "Son of a bitch?" (Son of a bitch is written across the entire picture.)
Ross: Thats all right, we-we dont need you. In fact, hey Im over it already.
Joey: Ooh! A tape with a girls name on it. It's probably a sex tape... (realises) Wait a minute... This says Monica... (looks around) And this is Richard's apartment... (realises some more)
Joey: I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company about that info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, and whenever I cant do it, theyre all like-like laughing at me.
Mrs. Bing: Honey, it isnt good luck.
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
Joey: So I got your car, its right outside.
Emily: Well, you have to understand how humiliating it was for me up on that altar in front of my entire family, all my friends.
Ross: Ive never walked down the aisle knowing it cant end in divorce.