words in movies
Joey: Oh, nothing, no. Its an acting exercise, Im practising my fake laugh.
(He goes and sits down next to Rachel and puts a cigarette in his mouth, which Rachel takes away from him. He puts another cigarette in his mouth, and Rachel takes it away again.)
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
Rachel: Come on, its a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasnt smoked since.
Ross: Nothing, its just that hypnosis is beyond crap.
Frank: Oh, well y'know, I wouldve called but I lost your phone number and then ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldnt find it. And then, I tried to find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So...
Phoebe: Yeah, isnt it fantastic?
Ross: Exactly, itll be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.
Frank: I mean, how hard can it be? Y'know, I mean, y'know, babies, y'know who doesnt want babies right? And besides y'know, I never had a Dad around, and ah, now-now I always will, cause y'know, itll be me. Right?
Alice: Oh no, but when it comes to love, what does age matter?
Monica: I mean really, think about it.
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
Ross: Pheebs, what, is it the age thing?
Phoebe: No-no, oh, Im fine with the age thing y'know, until it starts sticking its tongue down my little brothers throat!
Joey: Pheebs, he seems to enjoy it.
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Phoebe: Yeah, but if I do tell him, then hes gonna hate myself. I mean look at him and his Mom, I cant. (pause) But, you guys can, please you gotta talk him out of it.
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
Chandler: (reading the check) Pete Becker. Pete (quickly grabs a magazine and opens it up to show her a picture) (pointing to the picture) Is this him?
Rachel: We use it!!
Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. Youre 18, okay, shes 44, when youre 36, shes gonna be 88.
Frank: Okay, but isnt sex better when its with one person that you really, really care about.
Frank: You dont have it anymore?
Ross: It didnt.
Frank: Its so cool man, its so, its just cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her.
Ross: Dont ask me, I had it and I blew it!
Joey: Well, I want it!
Frank: You can have it!
Frank: Its out there man! Ive seen it! I got it!!
Joey: Then you hold on to it!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Joey: I couldnt help it, there love is so pure.
Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. Im so glad you could come, cause Ive got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. (Points to the table cloth, which has a huge mustard stain on it.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I know. Its a real mustard-tastrophe. Can you help me?
Phoebe: Y'know what, forget it. Its ruined.
Alice: Oh no-no, never say that. If we cant get it out then we can cut around the stain, add a little lace, you make a stylish throw.
Pete: Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
All: Got it. Yeah all right. Yeah, okay.
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thought Id curl up in it. Is that all right?
Frank: Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Frank: Y'know, I just was finally happy y'know. For the first time in my life! After my Dad left me, and then, and then getting arrested for stealing those birds, and then, and then the whole punctured lung thing! I can, its still really hard to take deep breaths in cold weather, but with Alice all that stuff kinda went away. And now its, and now its gone and I dont know why!
Phoebe: Uh, well I can tell you why. Its, its because of me. But, y'know what, I only did it because I love you. Okay?
Phoebe: Umm, well I, I kinda had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of made her see why you two shouldnt be together, y'know. And youre gonna see it to, one day, you really, really will.
Monica: Oh come on, its only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, is that enough lire?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its the middle of the night. Joey is walking into the living room, and runs into the entertainment centre.]
Alice: Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but it wouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?
Phoebe: Thats right, exactly. (sees them) All right, its a good bye kiss, thats good. (Frank picks Alice up and they move to the couch) Bye-bye. (They both lie down on the couch and start to make out.) Okay, no, the important thing is that you see what Im saying, y'know, just y'know, this is clearly wrong. (They ignore her) Okay, Ive decided Im gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get my purse? (She reaches in and Alice moans) Okay, all right, good. (leaves).
Mr. Zelner: Yeah, its not like I dont have a sense of humor, huh? Hell, I even enjoy a naughty limerick now and then. But theres a time and a place, huh?! Unless you uh, have a limerick right now? (They both nod no.) No? Okay, well uh, youve (Grabs the chocolates.) got my fax number. (Exits.)
Phoebe: What are you guys talking about, I loved it! It was soo moving. Oh, plus its just, its so different from the stuff you usually hear.
Leslie: Aw come on Phoebe would you just think about it?
Rachel: Ughhhh!! Forget it! (Sits down heavily on the bed.) This is, this is not how this is supposed to happen.
(She thinks it over, and then walks away.)
Ross: (to Joey, who is wearing a blue, 3 foot hand) FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE IT OFF!! (takes it off his hand and throws it on the floor)
Chandler: Yes, I know, as it happens my room is very very close to the parade route.
Ross: Okay, its not, its not.
Monica: Oh God! Orange juice just came out of my nose, but it was totally worth it. Oh my God, I completely forgot about your sound.
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
Joshua: Yeah-yeah, its this huge place, and-and its got this gorgeous view of the park, and very, very romantic. What do you say?
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Ross: Come on! The time we were all waiting in line for Dances With Wolves and that one guy cut in line in front of us and I just lost it?! Screamed at him! Turned all red! Red Ross!!
Chandler: Its yelling bleeding dilating. Oh, the dilating
EDDIE: Ok, then I want to hear you say it, I, I want to hear you say you want me out.
Rachel: Mon, if uh you were at lunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53 dollars?
Chandler: Why not?! I mean its just, its just climbing! Its just, its just steep!
Chandler: No, she's not okay? And I'll prove it to you. I'm gonna call her right now. (Picks up the phone and wipes it off) Phone's done ehh.
Rachel: No, Ill think about it. Yeah.
Joey: Its no big deal, okay? Phoebe and I talked about it. Its just a crush! Its going to go away! (Looks down) Dude, you gotta rearrange your bubbles! Oh!
Chandler: Hey, how'd it go? How'd she like the gift?
Monica: Oh, we were playing "peek-a-boo." She just � she loves it when I'm dramatic.
Joey: (pointing) It worked! I scared ya, I knew it! Ha-ha!
Ross: Rachel one brunch is not gonna solve anything. You gotta face it, okay were never gonna get along.
Monica: Wait a minute. What about that summer during college that you lived with grandma, and you tried to make it as a dancer?
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
Chandler: I KNEW IT!!!!
Monica: Oh, dad, turn it off.
Chandler: Du-du-I wrote it, I wrote it on the board! I wrote it on the board, then I went all over New York City looking for ya! I went to Rosss! I went to the coffeehouse! I went to any place that they made sandwiches!
Ross: Y'know what? I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
Clerk: Eight oclock is the cut-off and, (looks at his watch) aww, its 8:02.
Rachel: Oh. (She tries to walk away from Josh, by he keeps holding her) Stop it!
Monica: Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen! There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there? (Chandler has a disgusted look on his face.) Apparently youre not very good at it! I
Ross: Thank you, thanks. (Sits down next to the girls) Yeah, I lost it. Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore, (to Phoebe) would you, can you finish my set?
MONICA: No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.
Phoebe: Isnt it funny how we kept running into each other? Its as if someone really wants us to be together.
Monica: How's it going with her?
Chandler: Oh, its awkward. Its awkward. Its awkward.
Monica: So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesnt mean hes great in bed.
Phoebe: (to her babies) Stop it!
Monica: Why do you need it?
Joey: (grabs it) Thanks.
Monica: That's it. That's my worse Thanksgiving.
Joey: Oh, its Rosss bachelor party.
Joey: (to the guy operating the chipper) Hey! Hey!! (makes the cut it motion with his hands)
Joey: You got it.
Joey: Uh-huh, not as high as (picks a card) It worked! King!
Monica: All right then, when Im done with this place, its gonna be ten times better than that place!
MNCA: You know what? It seems like you've been making an awful lot of stuff Irish lately.
Chandler: It was an accident. Not like I was across the street with a telescope and a box of donuts.
Rachel: I know isnt it? Its like Im right there with Joshua.
Chandler: Yeah, it was time. The old condom ring in the leather just doesnt say cool anymore.
Phoebe: Oh wait! That can't be the one Rachel's talking about. She didn't even know that happened. So which one was it?
Chandler: Okay. Then I guess its just, wait here then. (Hands her the sign that says, Wait Here.") (To the ticket agent) Hi. I need one fake ticket to Yemen.
Monica: Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesnt make any sense.
Rachel: Oh, come on Ross! I think it would be really good for you!
Monica: Oh my God, sit down! Sit down! How long as it been since weve seen each other?
DOCTOR: No, under these circumstances it has to be an injection, and it has to be now.
Rachel: Oh... (opens it and sees it is a pin) Oh my God. He remembered.
Chandler: So you might say, its a magic ring.
Monica: Im so glad you liked it.
Ross: Oh, thanks! (Takes it and throws it back into the box and leaves.)
Rachel: All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have to take me with it!
Ross: Wheres my ring? My dead grandmothers wedding ring? Where is it? Where is it?
Ross: Sweep, sweep....(He starts to paint it on her eye, making it look like she has a black eye.)
Rachel: Oh, wait, Joshua! Joshua! (Pause) (Comes back inside) Yeah, well, that oughta do it.
Ross: Pheebs, youre talking about putting your body through an awful lot, I mean morning sickness, uhh, labour, and its all for somebody else!
JOEY: How do we say yes now and make it seem like we're not doin' it just to ride in the cool car?
Chandler: There it is.
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
(He hear a duck start quacking, and see it waddle into the living room from the bathroom. Joey wants to know whats with the duck.)
Chandler: Okay, if you see a little version of me in there? Kill it!
Joey: Shhh! (Pause) Man, you made me lose it! (He goes into the map again.)
Joey: I got it! (Picks up the map and starts walking.) Here we go.
Monica: Its nice.
Ross: Its all right! Everythings gonna be all right.
Joey: I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about it myself. Chandler is my best friend, it would be wrong. Good...(He winks)...But wrong.
Joey: It was different for you guys! I mean, I mean, you were both in the same place, right?
Ross: Hey, how can it not be me?!HeyHey!
Joey: Cut it out Ross! I hate to have to save your life and kick your ass in the same day!
Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
Joey: No idea! But the guy I said it to dies in the next scene so I guess it means "you're gonna get eaten by a bear".
Emily: So what are you saying? Its now or never?
ROSS: How 'bout from now on we just call it the 'unfortunate incident'? [Rachel walks off] Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?
Chandler: No, I mean it, this feels really good. Is it a hundred percent cotton?
Rachel: Yeah, it was senior year in college. It was after the Sigma Chi luau and Melissa and I got very drunk! And we ended up kissing! For several minutes!
Ross: Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can't deal with it, that's your 'too bad.'
Joey: (on phone) Hey, Pheebs! Its Joey!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the phone rings and Phoebe answers it.]
Chandler: Yes, but I just had one. Two. Two tiny cigarettes. Okay, five. A pack. Two pack�a�a carton. Three big fat cartons in two days. (How many cigarettes are there in one pack and how many packs in one carton in the US?) But it�s over, I made a decision, I�m not gonna smoke anymore.
Joey: Wait, well, where did you get it from?!
Rachel: Well Joey, youll probably get it. But you should probably your-your gracious loser face. Yknow when like the cameras are on you and you wanna look disappointed but also that your colleague deserved to win. Yknow? So its sorta like (Does it, youll have to see it.)
Joey: Oh, it was amazing. You know how you always think you're great in bed?
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is coming out of the living room carrying his salad and a puzzlebeer! Cold beer. And he decides to fold up Phoebes massage table, but being Ross has trouble with it as there is a knock on the door. He sets the table back up and opens the door to reveal a beautiful woman.]
Megan: And now youll see me buying it.
(Door buzzer goes off. Rachel answers it.)
Rachel: Yknow what? No. Its not over until someone says, "I do." (Exits)
RACHEL: Of course I clean it. I mean, I,I will cleeeean it. I mean, I will cleeeean it.
Richard: Now, that can be arranged! (He brings his sword back and drops it, causing it to fly over the wall.) Slippery little bugger!