words in movies
Joey: Oh, nothing, no. Its an acting exercise, Im practising my fake laugh.
(He goes and sits down next to Rachel and puts a cigarette in his mouth, which Rachel takes away from him. He puts another cigarette in his mouth, and Rachel takes it away again.)
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
Rachel: Come on, its a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasnt smoked since.
Ross: Nothing, its just that hypnosis is beyond crap.
Frank: Oh, well y'know, I wouldve called but I lost your phone number and then ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldnt find it. And then, I tried to find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So...
Phoebe: Yeah, isnt it fantastic?
Ross: Exactly, itll be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.
Frank: I mean, how hard can it be? Y'know, I mean, y'know, babies, y'know who doesnt want babies right? And besides y'know, I never had a Dad around, and ah, now-now I always will, cause y'know, itll be me. Right?
Alice: Oh no, but when it comes to love, what does age matter?
Monica: I mean really, think about it.
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
Ross: Pheebs, what, is it the age thing?
Phoebe: No-no, oh, Im fine with the age thing y'know, until it starts sticking its tongue down my little brothers throat!
Joey: Pheebs, he seems to enjoy it.
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Phoebe: Yeah, but if I do tell him, then hes gonna hate myself. I mean look at him and his Mom, I cant. (pause) But, you guys can, please you gotta talk him out of it.
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
Chandler: (reading the check) Pete Becker. Pete (quickly grabs a magazine and opens it up to show her a picture) (pointing to the picture) Is this him?
Rachel: We use it!!
Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. Youre 18, okay, shes 44, when youre 36, shes gonna be 88.
Frank: Okay, but isnt sex better when its with one person that you really, really care about.
Frank: You dont have it anymore?
Ross: It didnt.
Frank: Its so cool man, its so, its just cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her.
Ross: Dont ask me, I had it and I blew it!
Joey: Well, I want it!
Frank: You can have it!
Frank: Its out there man! Ive seen it! I got it!!
Joey: Then you hold on to it!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Joey: I couldnt help it, there love is so pure.
Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. Im so glad you could come, cause Ive got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. (Points to the table cloth, which has a huge mustard stain on it.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I know. Its a real mustard-tastrophe. Can you help me?
Phoebe: Y'know what, forget it. Its ruined.
Alice: Oh no-no, never say that. If we cant get it out then we can cut around the stain, add a little lace, you make a stylish throw.
Pete: Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
All: Got it. Yeah all right. Yeah, okay.
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thought Id curl up in it. Is that all right?
Frank: Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Frank: Y'know, I just was finally happy y'know. For the first time in my life! After my Dad left me, and then, and then getting arrested for stealing those birds, and then, and then the whole punctured lung thing! I can, its still really hard to take deep breaths in cold weather, but with Alice all that stuff kinda went away. And now its, and now its gone and I dont know why!
Phoebe: Uh, well I can tell you why. Its, its because of me. But, y'know what, I only did it because I love you. Okay?
Phoebe: Umm, well I, I kinda had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of made her see why you two shouldnt be together, y'know. And youre gonna see it to, one day, you really, really will.
Monica: Oh come on, its only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, is that enough lire?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its the middle of the night. Joey is walking into the living room, and runs into the entertainment centre.]
Alice: Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but it wouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?
Phoebe: Thats right, exactly. (sees them) All right, its a good bye kiss, thats good. (Frank picks Alice up and they move to the couch) Bye-bye. (They both lie down on the couch and start to make out.) Okay, no, the important thing is that you see what Im saying, y'know, just y'know, this is clearly wrong. (They ignore her) Okay, Ive decided Im gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get my purse? (She reaches in and Alice moans) Okay, all right, good. (leaves).
Ross: No! But we-we didnt have sex-uh, did we? I mean, I dont remember much about last night, it was such a blur.
Monica: The second that Ross walks in that door, I want you take him back to your bedroom and do whatever it is that you do that makes him go, (high pitched) rweee!!
Joey: Yeah, Ross, way to ruin it. I was just going to get dressed.
RACHEL: Oh my God this is sooo humiliating. I think the only thing that tops that was, was, was when I was in the eight grade and I had to sing the Copa Cabana in front of the entire school. I think I got about two lines into it before I ran and freaked out. Oh my God, my entire life is flashing before my eyes.
Erica: Well, it turns out that Erica didn't pay much attention in Sex Ed class, because the thing she did with that prison guy... it'd be pretty hard to make a baby that way.
Monica: STOP IT!! ...Oh my God. It's true! Who am I?
Joey: Oh, it was so amazing. After the (pause) love making...
Richard: No its not too soon, I had lunch at a eleven.
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
EDDIE: No help required Chico. [reaches into the tank and grabs the fish and puts it in his pocket]
Joanna: Dont spoil it.
Phoebe: Your hair looks too good, I think it would upset her. Ross, why don't you come on in.
CHANDLER: [throws it across the room while Eddie's not looking] Listen Eddie, um, I've been thinking about our current living situation and uh, why are you smiling?
Chandler: Well, then it looks like somebody is gonna have to give back somebody his cushions.
Joanna: It was, wasnt it?
Joanna: Wasnt it?
Tim: Last time I saw you, it was the morning I left for college. And you were just standing outside The Dairy Queen.
Joey: Man, I remember the first time I saw that girl Katherine, after we broke up. She was just walking with her friend Donna, just laughing and talking. God, it killed me.
Joey: Well, we only had samboucha, so it is now.
Joey: Theres this woman, that I like. A lot. Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. And I could never do that to the guy, yknow? Ccause were really good friends.
CHANDLER: Yeah, I mean, it would be rude to them for us to leave now.
Rachel: (angrily) BACK OFF!!! (She starts banging on their door.) Get up! Get up! Get up! God damn it! Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up!!
Joey: Its the chick! Shes going through some changes.
Mark: Actually, its kinda my fault. I-I quit today.
Ross: (to Monica) You like it right?
Monica: What-what was it you were gonna tell us?
Joey: I got you something! Open it! Open it!
Joey: Its cute, huh?
Ross: We were all pretty shaken up about it.
Joey: Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
Joey: Ok all right, no, no, no, no, I do, I do, I do, I need your help, but Chandler I don�t know if I can take anymoreplucking. It hurts so bad!
Joey: Ohhh, here it comes.
Rachel: Yeah, there was. It wasthere the corner of the library where-where all these dusty books that nobody ever readYes, there was.
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Rachel: I cant believe Mark didnt call. Its Sunday night, and he didnt call.
Joey: Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?
(Ross takes a twenty and slips it underneath the bill when Dr. Green isnt looking.)
Rachel: Okay, just sweep it.
(Of course its too late for that.)
Phoebe: Isnt it cool! Varoom! Varoom!
Phoebe: (entering from her room) Hey, did she buy it?
Rachel: Okay, now make it even, cause we dont...
Rachel: Blow it.
Monica: Does it have to do with Joey?
Rachel: Stop it! Cut it out! Cut it out!
Phoebe: Oh, just go. Youre never gonna get it!
Monica: What is it?! What about Pete?
Joey: Hey! (starts to laugh.) Hows it going?
Chandler: Thanks, Im glad you see it that way.
Pete: So you like it?
Monica: Oh, it is sooo perfect. Thank you so much. (runs over and hugs him)
Chandler: Oh no thats okay, you're totally right. I don't know anything about disciplining a child. But it did hurt my feelings and I want you to know that when I die, you don't get Joey.
Ross: Oh, it was, nah, well....
Joey: No! I want an award I did win! But nobodys giving me any of those! PlusHey Rach, if-if I put it up there (Points to the TV) right? When people come over theyll see it and theyll think I won it.
Ross: Yknow, its interesting! Most people think thats made with seawater, when in fact
Monica: Does it involve clogs?
Phoebe: Oh, its so great to see you feeling like this!
Rachel: Okay. Hang up! Thats it! Come on!
Phoebe: (to Robert) Youve have lipstick right here (points to her cheek). Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
Joey: Two it is. Ross, how about you?
Ross: Uh, no, its-its just this person.
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
(In horror, Joey wipes his neck and smells it.)
Chandler: Okay! (He grabs his carryon and starts rummaging through it.) Oh man! Dont tell me I did this!
Monica: But, I put some honey in it.
Chandler: Okay. I just wanted them to hear it from somebody else.
Ross: So its looks like were the first ones here.
Phoebe: Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so Im just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)
Chandler: Okay. (to Monica) Its a racecar.
Joey: Im on it! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich.)
Chandler: Could I borrow it?
CHANDLER: Ok, there is one more way to say it, who knows it?
Monica: Joey, what are you doing?! Its never gonna happen, shes seeing somebody.
PHOEBE: Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three of us had some beers and got to know each other.
Rachel: What time is it?
Phoebe: Would you relax? I know what I am doing. This is how he wears it.
Ross: Okay, its coffee.
Ross: Its-its hot
Tommy: Ice coffee? Tell me its ice coffee!
Joey: (surprised its Lauren) (hugs her) (whispering) Wheres Kate?
Rachel: But I couldnt even if I wanted to, because I dont know! I swear; I didnt see anything, and I dont want to know! It was just a momentary lapse.
Phoebe: Youre the cook! With out you its just me driving up to peoples houses with empty trays and asking for money!
(An old West style showdown starts with Joey and the Hombre Man staring each other down as the store guy slowly lets in the first customer while Joey and the Hombre Man get ready to draw. In slow motion they spot the customer, eye each other, draw, and as the customer walks into the middle Joey's bottle misfires but the Hombre Man spays it into the customer's eyes.)
Ross: No, but its-its-its hot!
(Joey enters with Monica's paper and hands it to her.)
Rachel: Ross, would you just stop it! Its getting really old.
Monica: Im just saying its been a really long time for you. I mean, women have needs. Do it, get yours!
Ross: (He thinks about it) Of course I am. I just have to make a call.
Lauren: So this is it? Victor?
Chandler: Well, I dont see that we have a choice. But, when were back home, we dont do it.
Monica: Phoebe, its been two days.
Joey: I dont know. Its-its just lately, Ive been feeling Okay, heres what it is (Pause) You know what? I feel a lot better, thanks! (Starts to leave)
All: Hang it up! Hang up the phone!!
Phoebe: Yeah, I know. Oh, good thing its one of those 801 numbers. Right?
Ross: I know, I know I really like you too. But we-we cant date. Its against the rules. Its forbidden.
Joey: (with a disgusted look) What was it?
Chandler: Was it like a sneeze only better?
Marsha: Yes, it is. Carol! Hi!
Rachel: (gasps) Emma! (Looks at the baby and starts to cry.) See? I dont want it.
Chandler: Whoa-heeeiiiiii-iiiii-ah!! (sees it) Huh.