words in movies
Joey: Oh, nothing, no. Its an acting exercise, Im practising my fake laugh.
(He goes and sits down next to Rachel and puts a cigarette in his mouth, which Rachel takes away from him. He puts another cigarette in his mouth, and Rachel takes it away again.)
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
Rachel: Come on, its a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasnt smoked since.
Ross: Nothing, its just that hypnosis is beyond crap.
Frank: Oh, well y'know, I wouldve called but I lost your phone number and then ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldnt find it. And then, I tried to find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So...
Phoebe: Yeah, isnt it fantastic?
Ross: Exactly, itll be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.
Frank: I mean, how hard can it be? Y'know, I mean, y'know, babies, y'know who doesnt want babies right? And besides y'know, I never had a Dad around, and ah, now-now I always will, cause y'know, itll be me. Right?
Alice: Oh no, but when it comes to love, what does age matter?
Monica: I mean really, think about it.
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
Ross: Pheebs, what, is it the age thing?
Phoebe: No-no, oh, Im fine with the age thing y'know, until it starts sticking its tongue down my little brothers throat!
Joey: Pheebs, he seems to enjoy it.
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Phoebe: Yeah, but if I do tell him, then hes gonna hate myself. I mean look at him and his Mom, I cant. (pause) But, you guys can, please you gotta talk him out of it.
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
Chandler: (reading the check) Pete Becker. Pete (quickly grabs a magazine and opens it up to show her a picture) (pointing to the picture) Is this him?
Rachel: We use it!!
Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. Youre 18, okay, shes 44, when youre 36, shes gonna be 88.
Frank: Okay, but isnt sex better when its with one person that you really, really care about.
Frank: You dont have it anymore?
Ross: It didnt.
Frank: Its so cool man, its so, its just cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her.
Ross: Dont ask me, I had it and I blew it!
Joey: Well, I want it!
Frank: You can have it!
Frank: Its out there man! Ive seen it! I got it!!
Joey: Then you hold on to it!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Joey: I couldnt help it, there love is so pure.
Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. Im so glad you could come, cause Ive got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. (Points to the table cloth, which has a huge mustard stain on it.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I know. Its a real mustard-tastrophe. Can you help me?
Phoebe: Y'know what, forget it. Its ruined.
Alice: Oh no-no, never say that. If we cant get it out then we can cut around the stain, add a little lace, you make a stylish throw.
Pete: Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
All: Got it. Yeah all right. Yeah, okay.
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thought Id curl up in it. Is that all right?
Frank: Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Frank: Y'know, I just was finally happy y'know. For the first time in my life! After my Dad left me, and then, and then getting arrested for stealing those birds, and then, and then the whole punctured lung thing! I can, its still really hard to take deep breaths in cold weather, but with Alice all that stuff kinda went away. And now its, and now its gone and I dont know why!
Phoebe: Uh, well I can tell you why. Its, its because of me. But, y'know what, I only did it because I love you. Okay?
Phoebe: Umm, well I, I kinda had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of made her see why you two shouldnt be together, y'know. And youre gonna see it to, one day, you really, really will.
Monica: Oh come on, its only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, is that enough lire?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its the middle of the night. Joey is walking into the living room, and runs into the entertainment centre.]
Alice: Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but it wouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?
Phoebe: Thats right, exactly. (sees them) All right, its a good bye kiss, thats good. (Frank picks Alice up and they move to the couch) Bye-bye. (They both lie down on the couch and start to make out.) Okay, no, the important thing is that you see what Im saying, y'know, just y'know, this is clearly wrong. (They ignore her) Okay, Ive decided Im gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get my purse? (She reaches in and Alice moans) Okay, all right, good. (leaves).
Joey: Yeah! Well, well really it's three. Please. You're so good at it. I love you.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't know. I mean it was fun one time.
Chandler: It doesn't scare me!
Carol: Oh umm, yknow I think it would be better if we just save it.
Rachel: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love- and that'd be it? (Ross gazes at her.) ..Ross?
PHOEBE: Phoebe, just watch that, I promise it will resotre all your faith in humanity.
Rachel: Well, yeah, right, yknow what? Yeah, youre right, I mean, we no, we have our fun. Yeah! But if (Grunts uncomprehensively) I mean, I mean like craaaazy! Yknow? Okay, all right. This is gonna, this is gonna sound yknow, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. Umm. Ugh. What if we got married?
Ross: I don't know, I'm one sorry polentologist. (Stops reading.) All right Joey, we get it. (To Chandler) I'm sorry.
Phoebe: Yeah okay, no if it helps you okay. Yeah.
Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you, for the love of God, Monica, don't do it!! ...Thank you.
Joey: I didn't get it?
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Chandler: So I was right. This is what it feels like to be right. (Pause) Its oddly unsettling.
JOEY: Well, it was a fight. . . based on serious stuff, remember. About how I never lived alone or anything. I just think it would be good for me, ya know, help me to grow or. . . whatever.
Rachel: Yeah, it is.
Rachel: Oh, good, good! We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma and we'll give it to her when she is 18.
Joey: I'm sorry, it just felt nice.
Joey: No! No! I-I can do it one more time! See? Look! (Eats another spoonful) Hmm, noodle soup. Damnit! (Storms out.)
Ross: Okay, okay. Enough, enough with the lunging. No! I'm sick of this. Okay. I've had it up to here with you two! Neither you can come to the party!
Monica: Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, its going great. Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.
Mindy: Now, I know things've been weird lately, but you're like my oldest friend in the world... Except for maybe Laurie Schaffer, who I don't talk to anywhere, 'cause she's all bitter now that she lost the weight and it turns out she doesn't have a pretty face. ....Okay, I'm just gonna ask you this once, and I want a straight answer.
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
Ross: Yeah! Theyre putting together this panel to talk about these fossils they just found in Peru and The Discovery Channels gonna film it!
Ross: (moving over to stand in front of her) Okay, okay. This morning you said there was nothing so big that we couldnt work past it together...
Ross: No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. I just, I just don't think breast milk is for adults.
Janice: Who's party is it?
Chandler: Okay. (He opens it and its a baby chick) Its a chicken.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah. You can do it to. (tries to do it, but cant)
Rachel: This one's from Joey... feels like a book. Thinks it's a book... feels like a book. And...(opens it)...it's a book!
Frank: What, wait, you mean like this? (does it)
Frank: Your not doing it.
Ross: Yeah, its hard okay, I only have two spots left.
Monica: Well it wasnt my fault, Phoebe was in charge of the invitations!
Phoebe: So is it like art?
Phoebe: No kind. He just makes it up.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and its been really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-I like you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Im just, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
Monica: So hows it going with you guys?
Frank: No, I wanna melt it.
Joey: Well, I started building one. But then I decided to take it to the next step.
Monica: Ah-ah-ah, now you started this, you will finish it.
Phoebe: Well, y'know we dont call it that, but yeah!
MICH: Oy. Look, I've been through a divorce, trust me you're gonna be fine. You just can't see it now because you haven't had any closure.
Rachel: Well, its about time.
Ross: Hey, its my list.
Ross: Oh, yeah, well y'know Chandler printed it up on his computer.
Phoebe: You really thought it was perfect?
Rachel: Yeah. Yknow umm, uh, umm, about that, umm, Ross I really appreciate your offer to let me move in and everything, but dont you think its gonna be weird?
Frank: Well, no, maybe-maybe it wasnt perfect, but y'know it was pretty cool, y'know, cause we had all those great talks y'know.
CHANDLER: Well it wouldn't kill you to say it once in a while.
Joey: Wow, its big!
Monica: Oh wait, you know what, I got it, I got it, pretend like you just woke up, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
Chandler: Yeah-yeah, so big that it actually makes our doors look smaller!
Joey: Look its not that bad. So what, it blocks a little of your door, a little of my door.
Rachel: Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.
Chandler: Well it you dont know that, then I dont want to do this with you.
Monica: And who laminated it?
Isabella: (reading it) Im not on the list!
Isabella: Y'know its ironic...
Isabella: Its laminated!
Isabella: May I see it?
Phoebe: Oh okay, its P as in Phoebe, H as in hoebe, O as in oebe, E as in ebe, B as in bee-bee and E as in (In an Australian accent) Ello there mate!
RACHEL: Wow. Is it, is it 'cause she's so cold in bed. Or, or is it 'cause she's like, kinda bossy, makes it feel like school?
CHAN: Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
Phoebe: Well not clients, lovers. But lets just yknow, try it again. Come back and-and well work through it.
Phoebe: Hey, how'd it go?
Phoebe: Wow, its like a dirty math problem.
JOEY: He-he-he, how's it goin'?
Monica: Oh, then it mustve been you. Bye. (leaves)
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, theyre all eating the wax, Chandler and Phoebe, dont like it. Joey tries some and makes a face like: Hey, thats not so bad.]
Rachel: Then how come it is?
JOEY: Huh? So whaddya think? Casa de Joey. Huh? I decorated it myself.
Monica: Yeah, apparently theyre turning it into some kinda coffee place.
(Joey turns around and sees his face on a poster in the subway. The poster says: What Mario isn't telling you...V.D., you never know who might have it. A variety of scenes are shown with the poster displayed all over New York City.)
Monica: Oh my God, you cant even see where the Titanic hit it.
ROSS: Hi honey, how did it go?
Joey: Oh, no thanks, I got it. (picks it up) No I dont!
PHOEBE: No it isn't, this is my dad, alright, I'll show you.
Joey: A handsome man enters. (Playing the part of the handsome man.) Hey! How's it going guys? I don't know what you two were talking about, but I'd like to say thanks to both of you. You, (Ross) you wouldn't let me give up on myself, and you (Chandler) well you co-created Fireball. The end.
Chandler: Whats it about?
Phoebe: No youre not, youre wondering which cushion it is.
Chandler: Well, it sounds kinda stupid... (looks at the TV) Whos she?
Mrs. Geller: Well what is it? Come on sweetie, your like, freaking me out here.
Joey: Nothing. Its just old and dingy, thats all.
Monica: Yeah! And I got it on sale, too.
Monica: I know, it is isnt it?
Ross: Aww, is it broken?
Phoebe: Okay, its okay.
Ross: No, I cant get it out.
Monica: Is it the Italian guy?
Joshua: Hey, heres an idea. Why dont uh, I put the food in the fridge and we can eat it later?
Phoebe: Ewww! Oh! Its the Mattress King!
Chandler: No, you didnt get me!! Its an electric drill, you get me, you kill me!!
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Ross: Alright, you madcap gal. Try to imagine this. The phone bill arrives, but you don't pay it right away.
Joey: Great, I'm finished! In fact, I just dropped it off at the agency.
PHOE: Oh, um, it was nice. Took him to a romantic restraunt, ordered champagne, nice.
Rachel: Yeah, that'd be great. I'd love it.
Joey: Come on man, you know Id do it for you! Because, youre my best friend.
Rachel: Yes, I did. Thank you very much, it was excellent. (Disembarks)
Ross: Its not a library...