words in movies
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler answers it. It's the pizza delivery girl.)
Caitlin: Ugh, I hate it! I look like an 8-year-old boy.
Ross: It was totally flirting. "Somebody got a haircut (Makes some whiney, nasally noises.)"
Phoebe: I know. But don't you think that it should be called Order and Law?
Ross: Well I'm sorry but you were! Okay? And besides if anyone should be hitting on her it's the guy who's single, the guy that who-who-who can do something about it.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I thought you were Joey's other grandmother. (She just stares at him.) I've done it again.
Phoebe: But I like it here!
(Phoebe then gets possessed 'cause she starts speaking in tongues. She speaks Italian to Joey's grandmother. She is quickly exorcised and returns to speaking in English. Of course, too most people English is a strange language as well. But none of them are probably reading this and if they were they wouldn't understand it. So why am I talking about them? I have absolutely no clue. Moving on )
Rachel: Okay, okay, okay, look, just don't freak out, but I kinda lost it. I know it's in the apartment, but I definitely lost it.
Ross: I'll get it! I will get that! (Runs over and opens the door.)
Ross: Oh. Uh, by the way, if it makes you feel any better. I happen to like 8-year-old boys.
Ross: (I can't make it out.) The uh, your hair, before, your hair, you said you thought your looks like an 8-year-old's, and I'm just saying I like it. The hair.
Monica: It's no big deal, I do it all the time.
Monica: Sure! It doesn't mean anything! Just like I know it doesn't mean anything with you!
Chandler: Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people. Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with other women?
Rachel: Uhh, no, no, it bothered me when he slept with other women.
Phoebe: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) I found it!
Rachel: Ohh! Thank God! Where was it?
Chandler: (smiling) Well, what is it?
Joey: (smiling) I'm in it.
Joey: Soon, soon, I'm gonna be on soon. There I am! (Points to the screen, of course it isn't him.)
Ross: Do you like it?
Chandler: Uh, Joey is gonna be right back. Right back! (Tries to pantomime it for her.) Meanwhile, let's-let's-let's talk about you. (Pause.) So, you're old and small.
Phoebe: Did you find it?
Monica: Yeah, what is it?
Monica: (shocked) Wow! All right well, I mean, what can you do? If you lost it you lost it.
Phoebe: I will replace it, I promise. I feel so terrible.
Monica: All right, sweetie that's fine. You didn't do it on purpose.
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listen honey, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. (Holds out her arms for a hug.)
Phoebe: I-I-I found it interesting.
Ross: Look, no-no, hey, hey, don't worry about it! In nine years, she and I will be right there. (Goes and sits on the couch dejectedly.)
Rachel: Well, I don't get it, but she wanted me to give you her phone number. (Hands him the slip of paper with the phone number on it.)
Joey: (on the tape) All right back off! I gotta gun! I'm not afraid to use it!
Joey: (on the tape) Now, I wanna a suitcase filled with 100,000 dollars. (The duck quacks, to the duck) Choo! Choo! Choo! (To the imaginary cops) Filled with $100,000 in small bills, and if I don't get it (the duck quacks louder) Choo!! And if I don't get it, (pause, picks up the duck) I'm gonna shoot this duck!
Chandler: (thinking it over) Well, I did put a lot of thought in the tape. (They both run into the bedroom.)
Ross: Wait! It was my plan.
Fat Monica: Oh gosh, listen if you and Chip do it tonight, promise me you'll tell me everything.
Richard: Well if it helps, it worked very well.
(Rachel picks up a newspaper and starts beating him with it.)
Ross: I told Emily to come. And I just need to y'know, talk to Rachel about it.
Rachel: Yeah, what's it about?
JOEY: You don't keep it over here on this table any more?
Ross: And, I dont know, if it starts to rain
Rachel: (looking up at the ceiling) God, Monica its on the ceiling.
Rachel: I know! I know, its such a huge, life-altering thing.
Carol: Ross? That opens my cervix. (He drops it in horror.)
Chandler: Forget it! Okay, Im not giving up the apartment.
Monica: No-no, Rachel, dont get it! He cant see us!
Joey: (entering) Hey. (Ross turns to see who it is, and seeing its Joey he just ignores him and turns back around.) Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but we have to talk about this.
Ross: Unreasonable? How about we have this conversation when one of you guys gets married! You have no idea what it takes to make a marriage work! All right, it's about compromise! Do you always like it? No! Do you do it? Yes! Because it's not all laughing, happy, candy in the sky, drinking coffee at Central Perk all the time! It's real life, okay? It's what grown-ups do! (He storms out.)
Monica: That's what it sounded like.
Ross: Wait a minute; you don't think it was intentional? I mean, that's just stupid.
Phoebe: You mean you stole it! (Monica sneezes again) Don't cover your mouth when you do that!
Sophie: Yknow why? Shes got the Christmas bonus list in there. I saw her working on it this morning.
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Monica: Harder than it sounds. Isn't it?
Joey: No, Im not! And it wasnt a hop it was a pademarie.
Tom: So you work at Bloomingdale's, huh? My mom calls it Bloomies.
Frank: It's not that weird, is it?
Chandler: Hey, I can be smooth. (Walks back to the Maitre d', very smoothly) Listen, we're a little bit in a hurry, so, if you can get us a table a little quicker, I'd appreciate it. (Shakes his hand)
Phoebe: I know, it is.
Phoebe: Undo it. Undo it. Undo it.
Chandler: She's really going to love this, you know? The bottom line is I want her to have it, even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her.
Monica: Oh, then bring it on! Oh, unless of course your afraid you might lose to a bunch of girls.
Phoebe: No!! wait, wait, wait!! Oh please, hold it up so I can listen. (Joey looks at Ross and holds the phone above Rosss shoulder.)
Joey: Yeah? I just figured yknow, after living with you itd be an interesting change of pace to have a female roommate, yknow? Someone I can learn from, someone-someone whos different than me. And whats more different than me; a guy whos not 19 than say a girl who is 19? Enh? (Points to his head.) Not just a hat rack my friend!
Joey: Yep! Looks like its gonna be a leeeeean Christmas at the Dragon house this year.
Big Nosed Rachel: Oh totally, totally. Y'know it's not that big of deal, we already kinda did it once y'know.
Ross: No! No! Im not! Its-its-its perfect! I mean its better than you just-just moving here, cause its us together forever, and thats-thats what I want.
Frank: Yes, it has a head!
Dr. Harad: Okay, now push! That's it push! Just concentrate on pushing! Yeah, here we go!
Frank: Okay, okay, come on, you can do it. You can do it!
Chandler: Okay, keep saying it!
[Cut to the delivery room, Phoebe is at it for the last time.]
Chandler: You know, I always feel that way after an interview. I'll bet it went better than you think.
Ross: You did it, man.
Phoebe: Well, on the bright side, now you won't have to see all these paleontologists with their shirts off. (Grabs a drink and notices that the two men are upset) Not you guys. You got it going on!
[Cut to Monicas restaurant kitchen, its the episode where Joey is working as a waiter at Monicas restaurant. Joey is patting her breast from when she set it on fire.]
Chandler: Yeah, Joey just pressed something on the remote and it just, came on!
Ross: Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do, make sure it seems like you're there to see him, okay, and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.
Chandler: You wanna see if we still have it?
Phoebe: Yeah. You won't be able to take it.
Joey: The reactors gonna blow in three seconds, were never gonna make it!
(Rachel looks at it and then throws it away. She then removes a fourth one, revealing a third hole.)
Joey: Well, yeah, it was a really nice thing and all, but it made you feel really good right?
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey-whoa-whoa-whoa!! Ho-ho-hold on a sec there, Mr. Kissey! Y'know, I've been meaning to talk to you about this whole, little, new European thing you got going on, and I just need to tell you that it makes me very uncomfortable and I justy'knowstop it!
(Ross's phone rings and he answers it.)
Ross: Thanks. (He starts to go inside and stops.) What photo album was it?
Joshua: You okay? (Rachel swallowed it whole and is not hacking like a heavy smoker in the morning.) You all right? (Rachel walks away, coughing.)
Ross: No. Im saying its now. (He starts putting on his pants, backwards again.)
Mr. Geller: Well Judy, you did it! She's finally full!
Ross: It could happen.
Paul: I wanted a big wheel. And instead my parents got me this little plastic chicken that you hop around on. It was embarrassing; kids made fun of me. That was a pretty tough year.
Joey: All right. Let's get the contestants out of their isolation booths. (He removes the waste bucket that's over the duck and the laundry basket that's over the chicken.) And they're off! (He puts his foot in front of the chick, stopping it from moving.)
Joey: Umm, well, what else could it be?
Monica: (answering it) Hello.
Phoebe: I dont know, it would totally depend on her coloring and (realizes) You got the job!!
Phoebe: Well, it helps the bee look tough in front of his bee friends. The bee is happy and I am definitely not.
Chandler: Hang on buddy! (He goes over and unlocks the door and opens it to reveal a fully furnished apartment.)
Carol: Ah yeah, but now its Susan and me in Mexico and the hostages coming home.
Phoebe: No, it sucks. I was saving up to buy a hamster.
Joey: I got it. (catches the ball)
Monica: They torn it down a few days early.
Monica: Yes, it was!
Joey: (interrupting) Hey! Chef Geller! Yknow that little speech you made the other day? Well I got a problem with it!
Chandler: Y'know that wasn't part of it?
Rachel: No, it wasn't. It was actually the
Phoebe: Its not kicking me, its kicking one of the other babies. Oh (looks down her dress)! Dont make me come in there!
Joey: Monica? What time is it?
Monica: Which we are, and-and we already paid for it. Its My Giant!
Monica: When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, I swam into the lake and fished it out.
Joey: Listen, I ah, I know its a longshot. But, by any chance did she find that funny?
(The band starts to play, and the recessional starts. Ross tries to take Emilys hand, but she snatches it away from him.)
Phoebe: Ooh, Madlibs, mine! (Grabs it.)
JOEY: Isn't it? And it's engraved too, check it out.
Joey: God, that would be weird it that situation presented itself tonight, huh?
Ross: Nothing. Oh, actually, great news! I just got off the phone with Emily and it looks like I'm moving to a new apartment. Woo-hoo!
Monica: Ohh, this is soo amazing! I cant believe my brothers getting married! And in London! Its so romantic!
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
JOEY: It really hit me last night. I'm gonna be on Days of our Lives. And then I started thinkin' about all of u, and how these are the days of our lives..
Joey: You're not gonna like it.
Monica: Maybe I could do it.
Rachel: (seeing Ross and Bonnie inside Central Perk) Oh my God! Phoebe look, its Ross and that girl.
Ross: Oh, Liam. So uh, what, were you guys playing soccer or somethingor should I call it (In an English accent) football?
Mrs. Geller: I'll get it.
Monica: Yeah, it did.
Joey: (entering the apartment) Hey. Man, it is so hard to shop for girls.
(Joey thinks it over.)
Joey: All right look, yknow how-yknow how when youre dating someone and you dont want to cheat on them, unless its with someone really hot?
Phoebe: Well, I mean, Im not my sisters, you know, whatever, and um... I mean, its true, we were one egg, once, but err, you know, weve grown apart, so, um... I dont know, why not? Okay.
Chandler: Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule. (on the phone) "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it (pause) Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time? (pause) Oh, can't you make an exception?"
Kathy: The Velveteen Rabbit. I kinda have the feeling you had something to do with it.
Joey: Okay. I will. Ohh! Check out what they got me to wear for the ceremony! (Runs to his apartment and returns wearing a rather silly hat.) Huh? I wear it like this when I marry you guys, and then this (He tilts it to the side of his head) is for party time.
Gunther: I'll take it all.