words in movies
Joey: (on tv) Oh, you said it Mike. (rips open the carton and spills milk on the counter) Aw! There's got to be a better way!
Mike: Keep in mind, he's never used this product before, you're gonna see how easy this is to do. (to Kevin) Go ahead. ('Kevin' starts using the product, it is a spout that you jab into a paper milk carton so that you don't have to rip it open.) This works with any milk carton.
Joey: (on TV, finishing installing the Milk Master 2000) Wow, it is easy. (starts to poor the milk) Now, I can have milk everyday.
Chandler: Well, I'll tell ya I do enjoy guilt, but, ah, it wasn't me.
Phoebe: Yes, it was! It was him! Uh huh! (they all stare at her) Okay, it was me!
Joey: How is it you?
Phoebe: Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler was in the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. (shows him her hand)
Phoebe: That is unfair. I'll call her and tell her it was totally my fault.
Joey: Hang up, hang up. (reaches with his good arm, but Phoebe grabs it and he tries to reach the phone with his other arm but can't because of the sling.)
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
Carol: He picked it out of the toy store himself, he loves it.
Susan: He carries it everywhere, it's like a security blanket, but with ski boots and a kicky beret.
Ross: Yeah, it's, it's, it's cute. Why, why, why does he have it, again?
Carol: This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised by two women, does it?
Joey: I love that movie. (Joey is using it as a pillow)
Monica: There it is. Joey, what are you doing?
Joey: I'm sorry, it just felt nice.
Chandler: Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to see her tonight. (phone stops ringing) Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
Monica: What is it with you people! I mean, the minute you start to feel something, you have to run away?
Joey: Well, I've never been through the tunnel myself, 'cause as I understand it, you're not allowed to go through with more than one girl in the car, right. But, it seems to me it's pretty much like anything else, you know, face your fear. It have a fear of heights, you go to the top of the building! If you're afraid of bugs.....get a bug. Right. In this case, you have a fear of commitment, so I say you go in there and be the most committed guy there ever was.
Joey: Oh, yeah. Go for it man, jump off the high dive, stare down the barrel of the gun, pee into the wind!
Phoebe: (in voice, on phone) 'Okay, go ahead.' (in normal voice on phone) Um, hi Annie. (listens) Fantastic! (to Joey) You got it. (on phone) Oh, okay, um, 'Will he work for scale?' you ask me. Well, I don't know about that, (Joey clears his throat to signify yes) except that I do and he will. Great, oh you are such a sweetheart. I would love to have lunch with you, how about we have lunch next....(hangs up phone) Op, went through a tunnel.
Phoebe: It was really fun, I mean I've never talked on a car phone before.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't know. I mean it was fun one time.
Joey: Yeah! Well, well really it's three. Please. You're so good at it. I love you.
Phoebe: Okay, I'll do it, but just these three, right
Janice: Ohhh, are you a puppy! (opens it) Contact paper! I never really know what to say when someone you're sleeping with gives you contact paper.
Chandler: It doesn't scare me!
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe it's not so bad. How did you leave it?
Joey: Look listen, that TV movie I went in for? Did you hear anything? I think I got a shot at it.
Phoebe: Yes! They called and you didn't get it! Okay, I mean you didn't get it, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Joey: No! No, no you can't quit! You're the best agent I ever had! Look Pheebs, rejection is part being an actor, you can't take it personally.
Phoebe: Yeah okay, no if it helps you okay. Yeah.
Janice: Who's party is it?
Joey: I didn't get it?
Rachel: Yeah, it is.
Monica: Oh wait, you know what, I got it, I got it, pretend like you just woke up, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are picking up Ben, while Monica is pouring chocolate syrup, lots of it, into her ice cream.]
Susan: What'd you do, dip it in sugar?
Ross: Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can't deal with it, that's your 'too bad.'
Young Ross: (singing) 'I am Bea. I drink tea. Won't you dance around with....' (spills some tea and it drips onto his/her dress) Ohhh! (runs away crying)
Phoebe: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Umm, could-could I get a copy of that? Cause Carol threw it out, she lost ours. Shes such a scatterbrain, but man what a hot piece of ass.
Chandler: Oh, its so hard to care when youre this relaxed.
Phoebe: Hi, Bubbles. Manly. Well, I just thought I would drop by and let you know how it went with Joey.
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Monica: Honey, cover it up with the boat!
Phoebe Sr.: So I guess youd like to know how it all happened.
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Monica: It sure is nice to do this together, isnt it?
Phoebe: Oh, it has a name?
Melissa: Oh, isnt a shame when one girl ruins it for the whole bunch? (Phoebe agrees by grunting.)
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listen honey, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. (Holds out her arms for a hug.)
Rachel: Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, shes like umm oh whos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
Ross: Oh yeah its fine. I guess the more muscles you have the more they can spasim out of control.
Monica: No, it doesnt say where it came from. Where would we return it?
Monica: Oh, okay. Here, why dont you let me do it?
Monica: Why dont we just find a place for it?
Chandler: It got interesting! Damn you Oprah!
Monica: Okay, if it means that much to you
[Scene: Chandler and Monicas, Chandler is sitting at the kitchen table eating cheesecake. The box it came in is also on the table.]
Joey: I know! I know! Come on, please-please you guys, dont-dont be mad. Im sure she just, she just said that stuff because she was nervous and you guys are like my best friends! Yknow? And it was our first date! Plus, shes really sick!
Rachel: Last night! I just felt it and I went into Joeys room and he was sleeping
Joey: I dont know. Ooh, I bet its Richard.
Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
Rachel: (ecstatic) Oh my God! Its Joey Tribbiani of Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.!!!!!!!
Rachel: Who is it?
Carol: What that woman... did. I am not doin that. Its just gonna have to stay in, thats all, everything will be the same, itll just stay in.
Mr. Bing: But that was after the wedding, its not bad luck then.
Ross: Yeah but still, I mean it shouldve been me. Im the dad.
Monica: So umm, what do you say we make it a weekly appointment?
Dr. Stryker Remoray: Good morning. (He walks over to the bed, leans down, and whispers to him.) Drake, its your brother Stryker. Can you hear me?
Rachel: Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
Joey: Over there! (Points to the couch) Before, with the bills! You tried to give some charity, I said "No," you dropped it. Okay? Then we had a nice last night together, we had some fun, we gambled, nobody tried to give anybody any money! Now out of the blue, you start with the charity thing again!
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Monica: Ok, let's see... Oh, the cranberry sauce, it is easy to make and no-one really cares about it.
Rachel: Okay, lets do it. Ill move in.
Rachel: I dont know. Is it crazy?
Joey: No, Rach, I shouldve told you sooner. Its just that Man! That kid is going to town! (Joey makes his awkward exit.)
Ross: No! No its not. Joey, this is a smart idea.
JOEY: Hey, Monica, the knob was broken so I just turned it off from underneath, I hope that's alright.
Phoebe: Is it me, or is veto starting to sound really good?
Rachel: Yeah me too. oh! I have an idea. Why don't we all pitch in 50 bucks, we'll pool our money together and then if we win, we'll split it!
Monica: Well its just umm Im afraid you might mess it up.
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Phoebe: You want it there? You take it there baby!
Phoebe: What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make me feel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks! All right, whats my next present?!
Phoebe: Oh yeah it is! Im going to the movies and it starts in like five minutes.
Phoebe: A little mirror that when you look into it you see yourself as an old woman.
Joey: Hey, so, uh, hows it going living over at Ross?
EDDIE: Naah, I crapped out, but Mr. 21 over here he cleans up, 300 bucks, check it out he buys me these new shoes, sweet huh?
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Joey: Nooooo!!! Y'know what? Now that I think about it, I constantly find myself without twenties and you always have lots!
Ross: What is it?
Woman on TV: Ohhh! Make it stop!
Monica: In the beginning where yknow its all sex and talking and sex and talking and
Monica: What is it?
Monica: (to herself) Ive still got it!
Chandler: You dont know. You didnt see it.
Chandler: How long it took to go back in the water?
Mona: I think its interesting.
Joey: Monica. Oh huh, I always thought it would be Rachel.
[Scene: A blackjack table, Joey is moving in to try and get his hand twin (who's dealing) to join him in his evil plot to rule the world! "Join me, and together we'll rule the universe as father and son!" (Sorry, I had a little Star Wars creep in thereOoh, I have a big spoiler for The Phantom Menace, Yoda lives at the end! Ha-ha, spoiled it! Now you don't have to see it!)]
Mona: Okay, but its Valentines Day!
[Scene: The Fire Escape, Joey and Ross have reached the last landing. Joey is tugging on the ladder that extends to the ground, but it wont budge.]
Monica: How long has it been this time?
Matt: You-you mentally make a flag on it and you say, "Okay show night, Im justIll never be able to get through this."
Monica: Okay, well, we have to get past this! Why dont we get rid of the tape and pretend it never existed?
(Chandler takes the tape and sticks it under the chair cushion)
Rachel: Why? You saw it? Is it scary?
Monica: Rach, you know that birthing tape you wanted to see? Its here.
Chandler: Oh, and we should warn you, before you watch it: dont watch it.
Ross: Yeah? Not to you, because you know this stuff. I dont know any of it and Im the father. I wish Id be more involved yknow.
Monica: I swear, if you try it, you will love it!
Monica: Its still beautiful.
Rachel: Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second. (Gets up but stumbles a little bit.) Whup, okay. (She makes it to the phone and picks it up, without dialing.) Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? We would like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I forgot to dial!
Rachel: Uh! Its horrible!
Rachel: Oh, screw you guys, you dont have to do it!
Ross: Oh, sorry. Well, look, maybe I can help you with it.
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: It looked like we were gonna lose her this morning, but shes a tough old bird.
JOEY: I can't believe you. You told me it was a nubbin.
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Joey: Its nothing.
Ross: Hey, hey, its me. Why cant you tell me?
Ross: Cmon! Joey! What is it?
Ross: Anyway, so, uh, so what is it?
Joey: You dont have to seem so happy about it.
Ross: I knew it. So, is she someone from work?
Ross: Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
Joey: Its Rachel.
Ross: Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
Ross: Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
Joey: Its Rachel.
Ross: (closes the door) Did you umIm sorry, did you just say its Rachel?
JOEY: Yeah, I'll have the Thai chicken pizza. But, hey, look, if I get it without the nuts and leeks and stuff, is it cheaper?
(They grab the luggage and drag it into Joey and Rachels forcing Monica and Chandler to follow.)
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Rachel: Oh, its so sad they never had a chance to meet.
MONICA: Nooo! Never! I mean, we're living in the moment. God, it is so nice for once to not have to get all hung up on 'Where is this going?'
Rachel: Okay. (Opens the card and reads it.) Happy birthday Grandma! Its better to be over the hill (starting to cry) then buried under it. (Breaks down as everyone glares at them.) All our love Monica and Chandler. (Crying) Thats funny, yeah!
Ross: Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!