words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
Joey: C'mon, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!
Chandler: All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
Joey: Instead of...?
Joey: Never had that dream.
Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
Joey: Ohh.
Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian...
Joey: Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?
Joey: Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormones!
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Joey: I say push her down the stairs.
Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
Phoebe: (grins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped!
Joey: (comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.
Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!
Joey: What, like there's a rule or something?
Joey: Who's Paul?
Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
Joey: Hey, Paul!
Joey: Here's a little tip, she really likes it when you rub her neck in the same spot over and over and over again until it starts to get a little red.
Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!
Ross: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.
Joey: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?
(Joey and Chandler are finishing assembling the bookcase.)
Joey: I'm thinking we've got a bookcase here.
Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?
Joey: Which goes where?
(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)
Joey: Done with the bookcase!
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-hey, if you're gonna start with that stuff we're outta here.
Joey: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?
Joey: You got screwed.
[Scene: Ross's Apartment; Ross is pacing while Joey and Chandler are working on some more furniture.]
Joey: Shut up!
Joey: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!
Joey: Great story! But, I uh, I gotta go, I got a date with Andrea--Angela--Andrea... Oh man, (looks to Chandler)
Joey: Right. Thanks. It's June. I'm outta here. (Exits.)
[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is making coffee for Joey and Chandler.]
Joey: Congratulations.
Joey: Listen, while you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make like a Western omelet or something... (Joey and Chandler taste the coffee, grimace, and pour it into a plant pot.) Although actually I'm really not that hungry...
Joey: Morning, Paul.
Joey: That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do you do on a real date?
Joey: Yeah, I'm an actor.
Joey: I doubt it. Mostly regional work.
Joey: Look, it was a job all right?
Joey: I will not take this abuse. (Walks to the door and opens it to leave.)
Joey: You should both know, that he's a dead man. Oh, Chandler? (Starts after Chandler.)
Joey: (sitting on the arm of the couch)Of course it was a line!
Joey: (bursts out laughing again) I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!
Ross: Come on, you made coffee! You can do anything! (Chandler slowly tries to hide the now dead plant from that morning when he and Joey poured their coffee into it.)
Joey: I can't believe what I'm hearing here.
Joey: Oh, you wouldn't know a great butt if it came up and bit ya.
Joey: Awful! Horrible!
Joey: Ross?
Joey: Hey, all right!
Joey: My Giant? I love that movie!
Joey: Hey.
Joey: (To Chandler) You're fake laughing too, right?
(They start to go into Monica and Rachels, their apartment is filled with all of the old Christmas trees from Joeys work.)
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Joey: (smiles) Kinda.
Joey: Nothing.
Joey: All right, I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You see Rach I'm an actor
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
Joey: Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman.
Joey: Sorry.
Phoebe: Hey, Joey, when you said the deal with Santa Clause, you meant?
Joey: Hey! Wanna play some foosball? Please?
Joey: No-no, no! We have to move the table into my room, yeah! 'Cause of all the boxes. Come on!
Joey: No, the quiet down thing!
(Chandler gives Joey her business card, which he eagerly grabs and he leaves.)
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: YES!!
Joey: (in a sexy voice) Yep! There's always room for Jell-O
Joey: No, Im not! And it wasnt a hop it was a pademarie.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are there. Chandler and Joey are looking through the paper.]
Joey: Uh, I think she's still asleep. Hey, hey, how did it go with you guys last night? She seemed pretty pissed at you.
Joey: Okay!
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: Yeah.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's and Ross's, Chandler is entering and when he closes the door Joey pops his head out of the fort like before, but this time he's wearing a cowboy hat.]
Ross: (To Joey) So, you-you think I should go ahead and take this place?
Joey: Oh, it's perfect!
Joey: How about those fries though, huh? (Holds the plate between Sarah’s fingers and his plate, thus blocking her from reaching his)
Joey: That's way uptown! That's like three trains away! (Phoebe pinches him.) Which is great! I love to ride that rail!
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: Oh! Oh!
Joey: I don't know. Maybe pizza?
(Joey motions, "Now, that's thinking!")
(The phone rings and Joey answers it.)
Chandler: (sarcasticly) Thanks Joey, that's a good idea.
Joey: All right! You can have the chair.
Charlie: Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really know me that well; it would be weird.
Joey: Im sayin I see a difference.
Joey: (sees Monica) Fire trucks! (Chandlers eyes double in size and he turns to Monica who doesn't understand what's happening. Then he turns back to Joey, who says "you're welcome" without a sound)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's and Ross's, Ross is working on his computer and Joey is making a lot of noise.]
Joey: I was uh, I was thinking I might want to pick one of those babies up for myself, I might want to get one of those
(Emily spins the bottle and once again, it lands on Joey.)
Joey: All right look, yknow how-yknow how when youre dating someone and you dont want to cheat on them, unless its with someone really hot?
Joey: Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see her husband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do with anything except that I found out today.
Joey: I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnt take it, and I didnt take it; and you (Chandler) didnt take it, then who did? (The duck quacks.) Shh! Were trying to think! (Ross and Chandler realise it at the same moment and stare at Joey, who doesnt get it. After a short pause, with the duck still quacking, Joey figures it out and starts pointing at the duck.)
Joey: Yeah, they're mine.
(Angela is eating chicken wings and making the weasel-like noise Joey had told Bob about.)
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: (reluctantly taking them) Chandler? A word.
Joey: Now, y'know the bee probably died after he stung ya.
Joey: Yeah, it was! All right, listen, I can't
(Follows Joey into their apartment and shrugs on his way out.)
Monica: Joey!
Joey: Didn't think so.
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Joey: What's wrong buddy?
Joey: Uh-uh, excuse me, I do have to interrupt on Rosss behalf. I-I think the rule applies here yknow, since she has a chance to get on broad back
Joey: Hey, Pheebs!
Joey: (sitting up from the couch) Hey Mon, do you have another pillow? (Holds up one.) Yknow, something a little snugglyer?
Ross: And if you think about it, I mean the reason he memorized all that stuff is because he thought it was important to you. You know, that's the kind of guy Joey is.
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
Chandler: It was fine, yknow? But she didnt agree with me as strongly as she agreed with Joey. She was more like, "I see you point, Im all right with it."
Joey: Hey. I was just gonna get something to eat. You want something?
Joey: Im sorry man, I didntIm-Im sorry. Im sorry. (Goes over and comforts him.)
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mush for thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey with his like teeny pizza! It's just...
Joey: So you uh, still wondering?
Monica: Joey, we had a deal. That-thats why youre here! Ive got to fire you!
Joey: You're smart. I like that.
Joey: Hiya.
Joey: All right they got water, orange juice, and what looks like cider. (takes a glass from the fridge.)
(Joey gets up and moves to the other end of his row to talk to the guy sitting there.)
[Scene: Monica's apartment, Joey enters with a menorah, the candles lit.]
Phoebe: Yes. Yes I am. Oh my God, Im gonna have a baby! (Joey and Phoebe hug.)
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
The Director: Hey Joey, were ready for ya! (Joey stumbles over) Joey, this is Alex hes going to be playing your son.
Joey: (on phone) Well, so anyway Beth, what Im saying is I shouldve considered your feelings before I went home with you that night. Ive ah, Ive recently learned whats it like to be on your side of it, and Im sorry. So, do you think you can forgive me? (listens) Great. Thanks. Okay, bye. (He sits down and crosses out something, and dials the phone again.) Hello, Jennifer? (listens) Oh hi, Mrs. Loreo, is Jennifer there? (listens) Oh, shes not home huh? (listens) Well ah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
Joey: Oh no-no-no-no, wait-wait-wait!!
Ross: (To Joey) Sir Limps-A-Lot, I came up with that.
Chandler: Bye-bye little puppet Joey hand?
Joey: Excellent, I'll be there.
Joey: Oh, hey, dont forget your shirt.
Joey: Ahhhhhhhhhh
The A.D: Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with(He gets a whiff of Joey and starts smelling around.)
Joey: Thank you!
Joey: Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talking about?! I mean, what about you?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Joey has got a secret peephole!
(He walks over and stands behind Joey.)
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Joey: I can't believe you guys are moving.
Joey: No! I am not a pervert! Okay? It's just I just Kinda
Phoebe: We're so stupid! Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying to take Joey!
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Joey: (To the pledge volunteers) How ya doin'? Welcome. Good to see ya!
Joey: We figured we could be late because you guys were gonna be on time (he points the foam finger at the girls)