words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Joey: You're in!
Joey: Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.
Joey: Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg."
Joey: Think it'll work?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Joey: No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
(Lorraine leaves. Joey shakes his head as though to say, 'It can't be the same Janice.' Janice enters.)
[Scene: The bathroom at the restaurant, Chandler and Joey are talking.]
Joey: No, no, no, don't! I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
Joey: (at the urinal) Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and I can't go when I'm nervous.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. (gets up right behind Joey and yells in his ear) Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
Joey: Good for you. (jumps suddenly) Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
Joey: (to Lorraine) We can't do that.
Joey: Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?
(Chandler and Joey leave the table.)
Joey: Uh, we might be leaving now.
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Joey: You're right, I'm sorry. You're right.
Joey: I'm outta here. Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry, Chandler.
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
(Joey enters from the stairs.)
Rachel: Oh, Joey, look who it is.
Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
Joey: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.
Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna!
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
Joey: (to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will.
[Flashback to Joey interrupting a bath Monica and Chandler are sharing in The One With All The Kissing. Monica dives underwater as Joey opens the door.]
Joey: Okay, Ross, I realise that you didn't expect to walk in and see that, but.. Let me explain, okay?
Joey: But what you saw, that is the extent of it, okay? One kiss.
Joey: Probably.
Joey: Ross?
Joey and Rachel: Yeah.
Joey: No, no, no!
Joey: No, no!
Joey: Yeah, but it did happen, so...
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the phone, everyone else is there except Joey.]
Joey: Look, we probably should have talked to you about this before it ever happened, but..
Rachel: Ross? (to Joey) Can we just close the door?
Joey: Really?
Joey: Ross..
Joey: I do like fajitas.
Joey: Look, don't you think that will be a little weird?
Rachel: It's open! (Joey walks in) Hi, Joe!
Joey: Yeah, I didn't throw any of that out..
Joey: Oh. Oh, thanks.
Joey: Hey, Charlie!
(Joey sees that she's carrying a small red bag.)
Joey: Uh, actually, that's..
Joey: Okay, listen, hey, Ross. Why don't you try to relax, okay? Maybe have a drink.
Richard: We may not have any weapons, but we still have food. In the basement I saw potatoes and some dry pasta, and a few tins of tuna! (Joey backs away and wipes his face again.)
Joey: Dude, are you okay? And when are the fajitas gonna be ready?
(Joey and Rachel don't know how to respond to that.)
Rachel: (To Joey) No need!! Problem solved, we are powering through (At which point she grabs his hand and pulls him back to their apartment).
[Scene: The hallway in Ross's building. Joey and Rachel are on their way to Ross's dinner.]
Joey: Dude, you just described seven days worth of stuff. Youve got to spread it out a little, you know. Havent you ever been unemployed?
Joey: Dude, are you okay?
Ross: Wasn't it? And you thought it would be awkward with Joey and that you never really liked Rachel.
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Joey is standing at the door, facing Rachel]
Joey: Well, she and I said from the beginning that we weren't gonna do anything unless you were okay with it. And clearly..
Joey: More back talk. And yes, I may be borrowing a few lines from my recent unsuccessful audition for "Family Honor 2: Thissa Time Itsa Personal."
Joey: It doesn't look good, does it?
Joey: Yeah. I'll see you in the morning.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Morning. Here you go.
Joey: It's okay, Ross, alright? I totally understand. Of course you're not fine. You're.. You're Ross and Rachel.
Ross: Joey.
Joey: I think so.
Joey: Yeah, but, Ross, I mean, you're not okay with it.
Joey: Chandler, it's like a big gerbil.
Joey: I will be okay! Look Chandler, you gotta get it out of your head that I cant take care of myself. Okay? Look, Im not gonna miss you helping me out with money. The only thing that Im gonna miss is you. And now the dog.
Joey: Come on, I mean, you know me, you know...
Joey: That's what I hear, yeah.
Joey: And we're okay?
Joey: I'm crazy about her.
Joey: More foosball?
Joey: (pause) It's OK!
Joey: Well, I... I know exactly what I'm gonna do!
Joey: (smiles then stops) Now I cant believe it! What? Rachels pregnant? (The girls nod yes.) Whos the father?
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Joey and Rachel enter the room]
Joey: What’s the matter?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey and Rachel: Okay
(Joey and Rachel start kissing)
Chandler: Because thats where Joey gave me some stuff to store that Ive never seen before in my life! Okay, that did not just happen! (He does a weird clicky motion with his fingers, that kinda hard to describe.)
Joey: Ok.
Joey: Hey what do you say, we move this onto the likes of the couch?
Joey: I don’t get it, Chandler loved it!
Joey: ...No... (he just can't seem to grasp it)
Joey: This thing welded shut?!
Joey: I'll do it!! It'll get the casserole stink off of mine.
Rachel and Joey: Okay.
Joey: Ok, yeah, got it.
Joey: Ok. Well, how, how can we make it easier?
[scene: Joey’s apartment. Joey and Rachel are sitting on the couch]
Chandler: All right!! (Gets out and Joey speeds away.) Wait! Wait, there's no sidewalk! Yeah, I'm gonna die here.
Joey: Sorry!
Joey: Then I blame you! Yeah! That's right! You threw me off with all your slapping!
Rachel: Ok well, well I'm really, I'm sorry about that Joey, but do you think that maybe on some level, you don't want to take off my bra?
Joey: (a little giddy) Uh, was that good for you?
Chandler: How was your date with Joey?
Joey: Oh, let me get this. (He takes out his wallet, but the panties come with it. The woman and waitress are shocked.) (Realizing) (To the woman) These are for you.
[Scene: A Department Store, Joey is selling men's cologne.]
Joey: Hey Chandler can I talk to you for a second (points to the hall).
(Joey walks in)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment.]
Monica: You wanna fool around with Joey?
Joey: Yes ma'am, ready to Power through!
Rachel: Well then Joey, what the hell were you doing with an engagement ring?!
Joey: (To Rachel) Hey!
Joey: Oh! yeah!
Joey: uh uh!
[Scene: Joey in his hotel in room in Barbados]
Joey: Ok, you're scaring me a little bit.
Joey: Uh! (When she's done she throws her bra at him)
Rachel: What? Oh my God! I'm so sorry. Joey? Are you ok?
Joey: Okay. Rachel and Phoebe are already there, okay? So they probably started without us. We could just slip in and no-one needs to know where we were! (he raises his hands and on his right one there's a Rangers foam finger)
Joey: I don't know.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's]
Joey: Well, I know what's the matter with me.
Joey: (stopping the waiter) Hey hey hey! Don't mind if I do!
(Rachel and Joey are still looking at Chandler, slowly letting his words get to them)
Joey: Yeah, was there a part of you that... felt like it was... really wrong?
Joey: Yeah, so we just keep trying and trying until we... do it.
Rachel: I know. Joey: I don't get it. I mean, I was so sure this was what I wanted.
Joey: So...
Joey: Yeah, me too.