words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Joey: You're in!
Joey: Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.
Joey: Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg."
Joey: Think it'll work?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Joey: No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
(Lorraine leaves. Joey shakes his head as though to say, 'It can't be the same Janice.' Janice enters.)
[Scene: The bathroom at the restaurant, Chandler and Joey are talking.]
Joey: No, no, no, don't! I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
Joey: (at the urinal) Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and I can't go when I'm nervous.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. (gets up right behind Joey and yells in his ear) Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
Joey: Good for you. (jumps suddenly) Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
Joey: (to Lorraine) We can't do that.
Joey: Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?
(Chandler and Joey leave the table.)
Joey: Uh, we might be leaving now.
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Joey: You're right, I'm sorry. You're right.
Joey: I'm outta here. Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry, Chandler.
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
(Joey enters from the stairs.)
Rachel: Oh, Joey, look who it is.
Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
Joey: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.
Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna!
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
Joey: (to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will.
(Ross, Joey, and Rachel enter)
Joey: All right, car magazines, cereal boxes, but its like enough!
Joey: Oh great, that'd be great. Thank you.
Joey: Uh.. <forgetting what the work thing was, rolls up his sleeve on his right arm and shows Phoebe, she looks>
Joey: I have to go to the bathroom too, but I dont want him complimenting my thing.
Joey: I know
Joey: Oh.. man..
Joey: Maybe now you can actually do it. You know? You can finally get over her.
[Scene: The Hallway between the apartments, Joey, Janine, Chandler, and Monica are returning from a double date. Chandler is telling a joke.]
Joey: Yeah, I just got off the Internet! Man, there is a lot of porn out there!
Joey: What-what?
Joey: Why?
Joey: (Unimpressed) A book? (Suddenly interested) Is it like a book that's also a safe?
(Cut to Phoebe and Joey)
Joey: Nothing
Joey: Yeah. Ya know what I think; I think we were all just being too negative.
JOEY: I didn't think anyone'd buy that, ok.
Joey: Uh, don't you mean "for whom?"
Joey: Yeah, like a moth to a flame, Im telling ya. Okay all right, so now you go.
Joey: (reading) Three down, Days Of Our Lives star blank Tribbiani. Thats me!! Im blank!!
Joey: Yeah you are baby.
Rachel: Hey! Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday about that thing with my boss. That really meant a lot.
Rachel: Bye. (She gets up to leave but is stopped by Joey)
Joey: Yeah.
JOEY: See, this is why I don't date women who read. Uh-oh.
Joey: Well I can promise you, at least one person will be crying. (Points to himself) Im an actor, and any actor worth himself can cry on cue. (snaps fingers)
The Interviewer: (To Joey) Yknow I think its great you wanted to meet here. Yknow when most people hear the magazine is paying for it they want to go to a big fancy restaurant.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is there for his interview and everyone but Phoebe are hiding on the couch.]
Joey: Oh, not at all. Happy to do it.
Joey: Oh man, this is great, uh? The three of us together again! You know what would be fun? If we gave this present to Emma from all of us!
Chandler: Ah, no-no-no just Ross. Ross and Joey is embarrassing enough.
Joey: And Ill have all the muffins.
Joey: Ewwwww!
Joey: Ah-ah-ah Mr. Smartie Pants, its just not my character thats not brain dead. Hey, so Pheebs, we still on for tonight?
Joey: No-no-no-no, hes not! No! Why are you trying to ruin the game? Come on!
Joey: Well, there are so many things, its hard to pick just one.
Joey: What are they doing out here? The coasts all the way over there. (Points to the coast.)
Joey: Yeah, you got a couple hours?
Joey: I think youre right.
Joey: One.
Joey: Dude, stop talking crazy and make us some tea!
Joey: Thats kinda nice.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Yeah!!
Joey: Right.
Joey: Matter of fact, I do.
Joey: Yeah!
(Chandler and Joey enter from the vending machines carrying sodas.)
[Time lapse, Ross and Joey are eating Rachels disaster.]
Joey: I like it.
Joey: Not anymore.
[The next one is from Episode 619: The One With Joeys Fridge.]
Joey: Ill take those to go. (To the interviewer) For the kids.
Joey: It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnt have said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
Monica: Joey! Youre doing great!
Joey: Okay.
Joey: No thanks.
Mona: Joey cracks me up! Its like, Yeah, why dont you have your ex-wife move in with you? That wouldnt be awkward at all! (she laughs again)
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, he is sleeping with Marjorie. All of the sudden, Marjorie starts talking in her sleep, awakening Chandler. After a little bit, she quiets back down, and Chandler tries to get back to sleep. Theres a short pause until she starts screaming, causing Chandler to scream with her. She quickly calms down. This all wakes up Joey, who comes over wearing the mouth guard, opens the top half of Chandlers door, and starts to complain about the noise.]
Dennis Phillips: Look umm Joey, I-I dont think youre quite right for this project.
Joey: I know.
Joey: Terrible! I messed up every line! I shouldnt even be an actor!
Rachel: Oh, Joey! Sorry!
Joey: No thats all right. Dont worry about it.
Joey: Rach! Hey! Its fine! Youre at Joeys!
Monica: (stopping him) No! Joey, we swore wed never tell!
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Judge rules, Nutter-Butter.
Joey: And the duck gets the Nutter-Butter!
Phoebe: You know, it's so surprising that you and Joey have known each other for so long and I've never heard about you.
Joey: Uh, we stars just try to eat right and get lots of exercise.
Rachel: Hey, come on! I had this friend from college and I made the stupid mistake of telling Joey that one time she and I yknow kissed a little bit.
Joey: Nothing, Im just practicing blowing you off because Im gonna be a big movie star!
Joey: All right! Ill have a sandwich!
Joey: Face to face, yeah!
Joey: All right.
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
Joey: Why would I return it? I love this bag!
Joey: I think face to face.
Joey: Yknow, when we talked about face to face, I dont think we thought it all the way through.
Joey: Great nap.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Joey: Hey Pheebs! (He sits down next to her.)
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it Oh My God, Im a woman!!!
Joey: Not good, no. I didnt get the part, and I lost my job here, so
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are standing and talking, Ross is tying a tie.]
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
Joey: Hey! How you doin?
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
Joey: Oh? Oh! Okay! Okay! Lets hear their plan! Now, whats the future look like for Dina and Bobby?
Joey: Not much to tell there Im really shy.
Joey: Oh great! Great! Thank you. (They shake hands.)
Joey: No! No... and, for the record, I've also never given her a frosting from a can!
Joey: Oh, good to know. (The interviewer leaves.) So close!
Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. (walks into the kitchen, Chandler follows closely, he turns around and gets startled). Oh, hi, you know that girl from the Greek restaurant with the hair (holds his hands up to signify she has big hair)?
Joey: Oh, I dont watch soap operas. Excuse me, I have a life, yknow?
Joey: Hey, youre the one that loves the picture.
Joey: Little bit, yeah.
Joey: (behind them) Oh!! Shrimp toast! (Walks right past the little group on his way for the shrimp toast.)