words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Joey: You're in!
Joey: Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.
Joey: Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg."
Joey: Think it'll work?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Joey: No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
(Lorraine leaves. Joey shakes his head as though to say, 'It can't be the same Janice.' Janice enters.)
[Scene: The bathroom at the restaurant, Chandler and Joey are talking.]
Joey: No, no, no, don't! I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
Joey: (at the urinal) Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and I can't go when I'm nervous.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. (gets up right behind Joey and yells in his ear) Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
Joey: Good for you. (jumps suddenly) Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
Joey: (to Lorraine) We can't do that.
Joey: Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?
(Chandler and Joey leave the table.)
Joey: Uh, we might be leaving now.
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Joey: You're right, I'm sorry. You're right.
Joey: I'm outta here. Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry, Chandler.
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
(Joey enters from the stairs.)
Rachel: Oh, Joey, look who it is.
Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
Joey: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.
Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna!
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
Joey: (to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will.
Joey: Well then, do it better!
Chandler: (slides the juice across the counter which Joey catches) What do you care? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you.
Joey: Hey, no way, that roosters family!
Ross: Anyway, one thing lead to another, and... oh... before you know it, we were kissing. I mean, how angry do you think Joey is gonna be?
Joey: Or ha-ha, we could go over there and pee on them.
Joey: Please dont kick Monica and Rachel out, this wasnt there fault, it was mine.
Chandler: Okay, all right, I'll just uh, make sure that uh, Joey gets her something really great.
(Joey starts wiping lint off of her back, but goes at little too far and Rachel just glares at him. He stops, gives her the okay symbol and walks away.)
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Why?
[Joey enters]
Joey: You can pee here!
Joey: ...I d'know.
(We go into a flashback sequence with Joey remembering some of those times.)
Joey: Oh, I know...
Joey: Look, we are not gonna
Joey: Fine, fine, so, why don't the four of us go out and have dinner together tonight? You know, as friends?
Chandler: Well, y'know if Joey and I played with matches we could get you up to an even hundred.
Rachel: What did you get her? (Joey opens up a rectangular black box and holds up a pen.)
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, you want anything to drink, cause Im heading up there.
Joey: Why not?
Joey: Yeah. And speaking of volcanoes, man are they a violent igneous rock formation.
Joey: So, you just left? Her place was really that bad?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Oooooh!
Joey: Wow. Thanks. So, uh, what happened?
Joey: All right, so... next time, you take her to your place.
Joey: You wanna see her again, right?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: What kind of smell?
Joey: Yeah!
(His dad nods. Cut to later. Joey is chopping mushrooms)
Joey: Look, Ross, I feel really bad. I mean, you're going through all this stuff and I just acted like a jerk.
Joey: All right, listen, Ross... you like this girl, right?
Joey: So you're gonna have to do it in the mess!
CHANDLER and JOEY: Woah, hey, yo. [Rachel and Ross move]
Joey: Our place, the hall! I...
Joey: Uhh, look Katie, uh listen, we-we need to talk. Okay? Umm, look I like you. I-I really do, I like you a lot. Okay? But sometimes when you, when you playfully punch me like that it-it feels like someone's hitting me with a very tiny but very real bat.
Joey: Wow. That's almost as much as a new book.
JOEY: Supposably. Supposably. Did they go to the zoo? Supposably.
Joey: Waiting for my Grandma to finish my laundry. What about you?
Joey: Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.
Joey: No, no, no, I'm telling ya. Imagine yourself living in a supermarket and you will understand okay? So the question is, what do we do?
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Oh, man, she loved it! She's over there showing Monica and Rachel right now.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is there, Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (laughs) Thats cause sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is looking out the window and Joey is sitting on the couch.]
Joey: Great! All right, so Ill call you later.
Joey: Yeah. Why are you getting so upset?
Joey: Whos Elaine?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are sitting on the big couch.]
Joey: Oh, yeah?! Then how come I keep thinking about her in all these sexual scenarios and stuff huh?!
Joey: I know, it was amazing! I mean, we totally nailed it, it was beautiful.
Chandler: Joey! Joey!!
Kathy: So is Joey around?
Joey: Yeah?
JOEY: That is so not my motto.
Joey: Okay.
Chandler: Hey its Joey!
(Chandler walks into the living room, and sees all of Joeys sisters, all wearing red.)
Joey: (on phone) Hey dude, its me.
Phoebe: All right, wait! Just wait. Everybody just calm down. Okay? Let's give our friend Joey a chance to explain why he's such a big pervert!
Joeys Sister: Finally, I thought wed never be alone. Can I just tell you something, I have not stopped thinking about you since the party. (kisses him)
Joey: Listen uh, could you put Kathy on, I wanna apologize.
Chandler: Oh yeah man. (to Kathy) Joey. (Hands her the phone.)
[Behind them, Joey goes up to the bandleader and interrupts the song.]
Kathy: Chandler, I like Joey a lot, but with you
Joey: Why?
Joey: Well, youre amazing.
Joey: No. No, Kathy.
Joey: No-no, Kathy.
Joey: Uh, I scratched it on the ATM machine down on the corner.
Phoebe: Does Joey know?
Monica: Yeah! Joey has the best boyfriend ever!
Joey: You do?
Joey: Whats up?
Joey: Yeah, she broke up with me.
Joey: Uh, Pheebs, you had a barrel for a dollhouse?
Joey: You know what? This is a bad idea. Forget it. Forget it, and listen, do me a favor, this conversation was between you and me.
Joey: Who?
Joey: What?
Joey: What?!! Thats even worse!!
Joey: No, things are fine with Kathy. Im having a late dinner with her tonight, right after my early dinner with Casey.
Joey: All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad?
Joey: (answering phone) Hello.
Joey: All right!
Joey: (answering phone) Hello.
Chandler: Oh! (Whispers something in Joeys ear and then in Rosss ear.)
Joey: Everyday use.
Rachel: And not one of your coupons for an hour of "Joey Love."
Joey: Guest.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Uhh, 11!
Joey: No! Im putting that in my room.
Joey: No-no-no, no its uh, its okay.
Joey: Five years.
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: What?