words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
Joey: I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
Joey: You're in!
Joey: Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.
Joey: Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg."
Joey: Think it'll work?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Joey: No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
(Lorraine leaves. Joey shakes his head as though to say, 'It can't be the same Janice.' Janice enters.)
[Scene: The bathroom at the restaurant, Chandler and Joey are talking.]
Joey: No, no, no, don't! I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
Joey: (at the urinal) Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and I can't go when I'm nervous.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. (gets up right behind Joey and yells in his ear) Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
Joey: Good for you. (jumps suddenly) Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
Joey: (to Lorraine) We can't do that.
Joey: Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?
(Chandler and Joey leave the table.)
Joey: Uh, we might be leaving now.
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Joey: You're right, I'm sorry. You're right.
Joey: I'm outta here. Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry, Chandler.
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
(Joey enters from the stairs.)
Rachel: Oh, Joey, look who it is.
Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
Joey: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.
Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna!
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
Joey: (to Chandler) If you don't do it, I will.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Well...
Joey: Nope.
(Joey looks satisfied)
Rachel: Oh, yeah. Joey doesn’t share food. I mean, just last week we were having breakfast and he had a couple of grapes on his plate and ...
Joey: (to a customer) Are you all finished here?
Joey: ALL FOOD!
Phoebe: (to Joey) You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
Joey: Mandy, uh? Uh... really hot blonde, big boobs?
Joey: It's a one-woman play called "Why don't you like me: a bitter woman's journey through life".
Joey: Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay? And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using a breast pump...
Joey: I think were not wearing the same shirt anymore!!
Joey: And starting to think about settling down!
Joey: (now laughing a little) Dude, I really don't think you should be wearing that.
Joey: Oh, that looks great! Good ordering!
Joey: Whoo, whoo. Wow, it's uhm... kinda weird that I'm sitting next to Charlie after we broke up.
Joey: Oh (grinning, trying to hold in his impatience with her) okay.. (she takes her hand back)
Joey: Yeah, because it is slim pickings. I had this date last night: Yuck! But we should probably keep it down; she's still in the bedroom.
Joey: I don't like it when people take food off of my plate, okay?
Joey: I can see why, nice shirt!
Joey: (Visibly annoyed) NOW look what you did!!
Joey: WELL, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!
Joey: Road trip! Yeah, we can rent a car! I just have to be there by Tuesday!
Joey: Uh, excuse me sir, there seems to be some sort of red crap on my cheesecake.
Joey: That's fire. Beats everything.
Joey: Oh yeah, sure. No problem.
Joey: Alright, alright, okay, uhm... How 'bout this, how about this? Tomorrow... tomorrow we'll both go and we'll tell him together.
Joey: Oh, all right, I'll just have what she's having instead.
Joey: (laughing) Really?
Joey: And, a brownie! (Hands her a bag with the brownie in it.) Well, half a brownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop and I was startin to feel faint so
Joey: Why, just a tiny little...
Joey: (to the torte) Stop staring at me!
Joey: Not like we used to. Remember? You and me used to be inseparable. Yknow now its like things are different.
Joey: I'm not even sorry.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. The scene starts where we took off in the last episode with Ross seeing Joey and Rachel kissing. Rosss tares at them.]
Joey: Ooh... Not so good.
Joey: Yeah, and you know what? We could do a lot worse.
Joey: Uhm... oh... I don't know, it's too hard.
Joey: Hey Chandler, while you were sleeping that guy from your old job called again.
Monica: It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
Joey: Well, I dont know. I think it does something to salami.
Rachel: (clearly not listening and still trying to find out where Joey went) Uh-huh... right... yeah...
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Everybody except Monica and Chandler is there.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is knocking on Rachels door, whose door frame is decorated with balloons. The rest of the gang is there as well. Rachel opens the door and the gang blow on noisemakers.]
Joey: Come on. This guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's... brother. He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is...
Joey: Okay. Thats good. Okay, that give you a couple hours to prepare what youre gonna say. Good. Yeah. (Someone comes out of his apartment and it startles Joey again.) Dont you people ever knock?!
Joey: Hey, is uhm... is Chandler here?
(Joey walks in and sees Monica. He freaks out and runs back into the hallway, screaming.)
Joey: (to Chandler) You son of a bitch!
Joey: (clearly shocked) What?
Joey: (opening his door) If I cant have it you cant have it! (Rachel walks away angrily.)
Rachel: Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!
[Scene: The restaurant. Phoebe and Joey are sitting alone at a table for six.]
Joey: What the hell are you doin'?
Joey: (yelling through the door) Can we come it yet?! Were dying out here!
Joey: (he has a turkey on his head) It's stuck!!!
Joey: I put it on to scare Chandler!
Joey: It's Joey.
Joey: Oooooh!
Joey: Hey, hey, look! It’s not about a few fries... it’s about what the fries represent.
Joey: Guest.
Joey: Uhh, 11!
Joey: Everyday use.
(from 5.15 - "The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey")
JOEY: Yeah.� Maybe Michael Jordon will dive for the ball and break my jaw with his knee.
Joey: (panicking) Dude! He's right there!
Joey: I don't know, but one of the extras sure did! (pause) Hey, listen Rach. Thanks again for coming down to watch my scenes!
Joey: Correct! Now, would you like to pick a Wicked Wango card or spin the Wheel of Mayhem?
The Director: Im sorry Joey, as long as hes here and hes conscious were still shooting.
Joey: I'm really sorry you guys.
Joey: Rachel's right. This is where you guys belong.
Joey: You know, I'm really sorry I wasn't more supportive before.
Joey: Sure.
Joey: Would you guys want to come down tomorrow and watch me tape the show?
Joey: Hey guys!
Joey: Seriously?
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone's sitting on the couch. Monica and Joey enter.]
Joey: Just watch it, and if you don't like it, you don't pass it on to your bosses!
Rachel: (talking with a higher voice, and puckered lips kind of like you do to a baby or...well a puppy its hard to explain. Just use your imagination!) Oh, well, you are so cute! I wish I could play with you more, but Ive got to go to work! I hope I stop talking like this before my marketing meeting, yes I do. Yes I do. (still talking like that) Bye-bye, Joey. Oh, I seriously cant stop it. (exits)
Joey: Yeah! But that is not what they're looking for. (time's finished) OOOH!
Joey: A spoon. Your hands. Your face!
Joey: Oh!
Joey: Ketchup!
Joey: Oh.
Joey: Relish!
Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!
Joey: Paper, snow, a ghost!
Joey: Yeah...
Joey: A rock, a dog, the earth.
Donny: Oh, time's up! Joey! You were, uh, almost on a roll there...
Joey: Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!
JOEY: Yeah, unless you hook up with a bunch of pigeons.
Joey: Hey, it's a lot harder than it looks! Okay? (Quietly) She-she-she's hurting me.
Joey: (smiling from ear to ear) Ah-haah! I win!!
Joey: Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams.
Joey: (out of his Monica character) Very good! Drawing on your own experience, I like that!
Joey: Chickens?
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
Ross: Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.
Joey: All right, Im here, lets ahh, get this over with.