words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Joey: Done.
Joey: So Pheebs whats this guy like?
Joey: Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with the belly button ring again?
Joey: Yeah!
[Scene: The Xerox place, Chandler and Joey are waiting in line.]
Issac: (to Chandler and Joey) Can I help you?
Joey: Uh, y'know what, were having second thoughts about our copying needs. And well need a little more time to think about it.
Chandler: (to Joey) Okay, that hurt us.
Joey: Both of us? (points to Chandler and himself)
Joey: Well be there.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are sitting on the big couch.]
Joey: Uh, 10:30.
Joey: 4:30.
Joey: Yeah. Hey, remember when she brought up that thing about the three of us?
Joey: She was kidding about that right?
Joey: God, that would be weird it that situation presented itself tonight, huh?
Joey: Dude, I dont know.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Yeah, for sure. Okay. Probably want the first thing to be, never open your eyes. Y'know, because you dont want to be doing something and then look up and see something you dont want to be seeing.
Joey: Ah!! Okay! Eyes open at all times! Oh, hey, how do we decide where we... (clears throat) y'know each would, (clears throat again) y'know (pause) be?
Joey: Yeah, I guess, but whats like heads and whats tails?
[Scene: The Philly, Chandler and Joey are talking to Chloe.]
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we said we dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
(Chandler and Joey stare at each other in shock.)
Joey: So what are you gonna do?
Joey: Yeah, tell that to my Uncle Lenny.
Joey: Nothing, hes just really believes in that.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is eating breakfast as Chandler comes out of his bedroom, ripping his coat in the process.]
Joey: Oh. (Takes off the hat.) Sorry!
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (yelling through the door) Can we come it yet?! Were dying out here!
Joey: How is "Monica, I love your sweet ass," inappropriate?
Chandler: Im right! Right? There was like no chemistry between them. Before they had heat, and now theres no heat! Now you know what this means, Joey told us what this means!
Joey: Okay.
Joey: (shocked) Has it been that long?!
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Estelle: Joey! Its Estelle! I just talked to the casting people; they loved you!
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
Joey: IN LONDON!!!
Joey: How?! When?!
(Joey thinks it over.)
Joey: All right! Man, this is unbelievable!
Joey: But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone!
Joey: Okay, see that blind guy right there? I'm gonna bash his head in later.
Ross: Oh and you know what, it will be even better tomorrow, because I won't be constantly interrupted by Joey checking to see if they put chocolates on my pillow yet. (Someone knocks on the door, Ross goes to open and it's Joey, Rachel and Chandler).
Monica: Joey!
Joey: (nervously backing away) I-I-I-I did? (He puts a stool in front of her.)
Joey: Well I didn't tell them!
Joey: And Rachel. I would've told you but they made me promise not to tell!
Joey: Many are scheduled to appear.
Joey: No.
Rachel: Joey!
Joey: They know you know.
Ross: (he rolls up his sleeve) Gimme the bottle. (Joey hands him the bottle and Ross squirts some on his arm.) Gimme the towel. (Joey gives him the towel and he wipes it off.)
Joey: Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.
Joey: Ooh!
Phoebe: God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess with us?! They don't know that we know they know we know! (Joey just shakes his head.) Joey, you can't say anything!
Joey: Oh, Im sorry, Ross. Ill get it for you right now. And since I made you wait, Ill toss in a free muffin.
Joey: It's not my first time.
Joey: (entering the hall) Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet?!
Joey: All right, lets get me back up there! (Holds out his picture.)
Joeys Date: You must be Rachel, Im Erin.
Joey: So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Joey and Ross are talking.]
Joey: Im sorry, I just I like things the way they are.
Joey: Okay. Can I squeeze your ass?
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: What? I dont get it.
Joey: (To Chandler) (laughing) Funny one! Thats good!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Ross and Joey are reading Chandlers new vows.]
Rachel: (shocked) You let Joey drive it?!
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Joey: Hey!
Joey: So uh, whats your name?
Joey: Me too! Theres a game on Tuesday do you wanna go?
[Scene: Ross's apartment the next morning. Ross is very hung-over on the couch as Joey enters with a cup of coffee for him.]
Joey: Uh, Entertainment Tonight. [Cut to Chandler] Yeah, okay so, good talking to ya and don't come out here. All right. (Hangs up the phone and poses for that picture.)
The Casting Director: Wait Joey! You didnt need to come down because the director saw your tape from yesterday and loved it.
Joey: Pheebs!
Joey: Oh. (Laughs.) No! No wait, thats weird!
The Casting Director: (entering) Okay uh, we have narrowed it down to Raymond, Ben, Kyle, and Joey. The rest of you, thank you very much.
Joey: Thats weird!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Joey enters.]
Chandler: Well, stuff like where we'd live, y'know? Like a small place outside the city, where our kids could learn to ride their bikes and stuff. Y'know, we could have a cat that had a bell on its collar and we could hear it every time it ran through the little kitty door. Of course, we'd have an apartment over the garage where Joey could grow old.
Joey: Thats kinda hot.
Joey: Yeah, I wouldnt know about that.
Joey: Youve seen my huge stack of porn right? (Phoebe nods.)
Phoebe: Joey! (Examining the dress.) Wow, you didnt rip off any buttons.
Joey: I can't decide which route to take to Vegas. Hey, you've traveled a lot right?
Joey: I gotta do what I gotta do, you gotta do what you gotta do, you just do it.
[Scene: Richard's apartment. There's a knock on the door.The listing agent opens the door for Chandler and Joey.]
Phoebe: Or! I should rush through dinner with Joey and I can meet David at 9:00!
Joey: Hi I'm Joey. This is Chandler.
Joey: Listen, you know how uh, when youre wearing pants and you lean forward I check out your underwear?
Joey: Yeah! And-and things arent as smashed down as I thought they were gonna be.
Joey: The silk? Feels really good!
Joey: Hey Pheebs! (He sits down next to her.)
Joey: Oh... food. No, sex. Food! Sex! Food! Se-I don't know! Good God, I don't know, I want girls on bread!
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Hm-mmm.
Ross: Ah. Joey youre-youre having lunch with my mom?
Joey: Nooo!
Joey: No!
Joey: No!
Joey: Yes!!
Joey: Oh no, Ill be done by then.
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
[Scene: Filming a scene from the movie. Joey is dying on a gurney, Van Damme is looking over him.]
Joey: Uhh, because I'm shooting a scene right now. Yeah, I uh, I play a gladiator. Uh, y'know what? Hold-hold on a second. (To no one in particular) Can we cut? Yeah, my-my friends are here, I'm gonna take a little break.
Joey: I think you did.
Richard: Nice to meet you Joey.
Joey: I know! All right, Ill see you guys over there! Im off to fight the Nazis.
Joey: Would she? (He smells something and gasps as he realizes what it is.) You ate my candy bar!
Joey: Im doing my scenes with you?
Joey: Yeah! Me too. (He pats his pocket.)
Joey: Whoa!! Now look, dont be just blurtin stuff out. I want you to really think about your answers. Okay?
Joey: Uh Cookie?
Joey: (wiping his face) What?!
Joey: Is there anything we should know about the apartment?
The Director: Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is something wrong?
(Joey wipes his eye.)
Joey: (wipes face) So what are we gonna do?! We have no reinforcements! No-no food!
Joey: (To Chandler) I bet it was about her a little.
Joey: All right, it wont go down any further. Its stuck.
Joey: Hey! I am secure with my masculinity.
Joey: Oh sureAnd hey, dont get me wrong, I am so happy for you guys. I just I miss hanging out just-just us, yknow?