words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Joey are standing at the counter. Monica is flipping a light switch on and off next to the door.]
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
Joey: Ohh, Nothing.
Joey: I know what it did! Nothing.
Joey: Like this. (Shrugs)
Joey: Sure! It flushes it.
Joey: Hey! (Sees Janice.) Ah!! (Janice screams in surprise.)
Joey: And there it is.
Chandler: Bye. (Finally closes the door on her.) (After its closed) I cant stand the woman! (Phoebe is shocked, Joey is relieved.)
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Joey: Yeah, try sticking it in the freezer for 20 minutes. (They all look around and then back at Joey.) Im tellin ya!
Rachel: (entering, with Joey) Hey!
Joey: Hey! Whats up?
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Rachel: Its coming from Joey!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Joey: Hey-hey, whats going on?
Joey: Thanks for telling me!
Joey: Ohhhh, good one! And Yemen that actually sounds like a real country.
Chandler: (to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!
Joey: Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you said youd play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Joey: All right, come on look, Ross can take care of himself! Its not like hes Chandler!
(Ross turns and wants to attack Rachel, but Joey stops him.)
[Scene: The park, everyone is warming up for the rugby game. Only Joey and Phoebe came to support Ross.]
Joey: Ross-Ross-Ross-Ross! Stay away from that guy (Points), and that guy (Points). And that oneDude! Theyre all huge!
Joey: Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you look bigger to you from where you are.
Phoebe: Whoa! (The player leaves and to Joey) I kinda liked it.
Ross: Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross. (Joey and Phoebe dont know what hes talking about.) Yknow, Red Ross!
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Joey: No.
Ross: JOEY!!!!!!
Ross: Thanks. (When shes gone he collapses into Joey.) I-I think Im dying. I really do.
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Joey: The Red Ross! Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, They are returning from the rugby game, Joey and Emily are carrying Ross.]
Joey: Yeah, sure.
Joey: Uhh, look, your eyes still popping out a little, Im gonna go get some ice.
Monica: I guess Joey was right, it does nothing.
[Cut to Chandler and Joeys, Joey and Phoebe are watching TV. The TV is turning off and on, and each time Phoebe is blinking her eyes like the Genie did. The switch obviously controls the outlet which the TV is plugged into.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Joey: Why?
Joey: (entering the bathroom) What are you guys doing in here?
Joey: (from outside the bathroom) Hello?
Phoebe: Hi, Bubbles. Manly. Well, I just thought I would drop by and let you know how it went with Joey.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is still writing in her book, Chandler and Monica are in the kitchen as Joey enters.]
Joey nods: Yeah.
Joey: (thinking) I love you.
(Chandler runs around behind Ross, who pitches him the ball. Chandler runs upfield, and Joey knocks the ball out of his hands.)
Joey: Terrified. (But for a totally different reason.)
Joey: (slowly turning and glaring at her) Shes not even cold yet!
Joey: Oh, I love you too.
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that were having this baby together. I love you so much.
Joey: What? Whats going on?
Joey: Really?!
Joey: Oh my, oh my God!
Joey: Oh thats amazing. (Drops the sheet.)
Rachel: (bursts into the room) Joey! Joey!
(Joey starts to get up but stops.)
Joey: I cant look at you right now! (Exits and slams the door behind him.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Youre not gonna use the pay phone to call work, are ya?
Joey: I know! I know! Come on, please-please you guys, dont-dont be mad. Im sure she just, she just said that stuff because she was nervous and you guys are like my best friends! Yknow? And it was our first date! Plus, shes really sick!
Joey: Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
Rachel: Last night! I just felt it and I went into Joeys room and he was sleeping
(Joey and Ross enter causing Chandler to quickly hide the brochure behind his back.)
Joey: Why not?
Joey: I dont know. Ooh, I bet its Richard.
Joey: Oh hey whoa-whoa, dont worry. Okay. When my sisters were pregnant they got every weird feeling in the book, it was always nothing.
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, that thats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
Joey: Hey! So?
Joey: Maybe. So this is the living room huh? Ooh, it's pretty dark. (starts feeling around him like he's in a completely dark room, touching Chandler, who backs out and hits him)
Joey: Okay. (Reading.) "It's a typical New York City apartment. Two guys are hanging out." Ross (Points to him.)
Joey: So but everything is normal.
Joey: You sure?!
(Joey and Rachel reach the landing just as Chandler closes the door.)
Joey: Calm?! I wasnt calm! Ive never been more scared in all my life!
Joey: Well what do I know?! Im not a doctor!
Joey: (seeing Ross) Oh hey-hey!
Ross: Hi. (They shake hands.) Its nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I dont anymore.
Joey: Okay. Now youre gonna want to have sex with me when you hear it, but you have to remember it is just the story.
[Scene: Joeys in the front entrance watching for Rachel. The bridesmaid he met at the rehearsal dinner come in.)
Joey: Hey uh, whats with the candy?
Joey: Sure. "Monica."
[Scene: Joey and Janines, continued from earlier.]
Joey: Then why do you throw like one?
Ross: (To Joey) So, thanks so much for bringing her to the hospital.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Oh, I just I feel terrible.
Joey: Whats going on?
Joey: I know. I know. And shes not only my friend; shes my pregnant friend! Shes my pregnant friend whos Ross ex!
Joey: Maybe you two should live together.
Joey: Uh, sit down. I wanna talk about our situation.
Joey: All right now, so? What do you think?
Ross: No! No its not. Joey, this is a smart idea.
Joey: No, Rach, I shouldve told you sooner. Its just that Man! That kid is going to town! (Joey makes his awkward exit.)
Joey: Well, I was due.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, no, its a good thing. Why must we dial so speedily anyway? Why must we rush through life? Why cant we savor the precious moments? (to one of Joeys sisters) Those are some huge breasts you have.
JOEY: Hey, Monica, the knob was broken so I just turned it off from underneath, I hope that's alright.
Joey: Hey.
Phoebe: Joey, I just think youre getting worked up over nothing. This is probably just a crush.
Joey: Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im better than great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuff around here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around naked again. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, this is good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way. Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats a wolf got to do to get a huh around here?! (Chandler rushes over and hugs him.)
Joey: Yeah, of course. I can control myself. (laughs uneasily and Sarah leaves the room)
Joey: Bye.
Joey: (notices something in the mail that Rachel brought in) Oh my God!
Joey: Oh, okay.
Gunther: (to Joey) You want anything?
Joey: Thanks. But maybe later.
Joey: All right, I'll give you this, Mr. Peanut is a better dresser. I mean he's got the monocle, he's got the top hat...
Joey: No, Im not sleeping with your friend Jane again.
[Scene: Joey and wait just Joeys. Joey is sitting at the counter eating a pizza.]
Joey: Thanks so much, Pheebs! (to the dog) We are going to have so much fun, yes we are! (the dog sticks his head between Joeys legs) Oh! Not that kind of fun.
Joey: Hi.
(The dog returns with a ball that looks exactly like the same one Joey has.)
Joey: (looking at the ball the dog brought back) Did I just throw this?
Joey: (holding a plate of what looks like Rice Crispies Treats) I know, here-here!! (Hands her the plate.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are there as Ross enters.]
(Joey enters from behind a curtain. The others all talk at once.)
Joey: Ross! Ross! If youre going to the airport, could you pick me up another one of those Toblerone bars? (Chandler nods his head no.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Ross: Yeah, Im missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.
Joey: Maybe she wants you to learn something. Huh? Now is there anything youre really bad at yknow, sexually?
Joey: Hey.
Joey: No.
Joey: Monica. Oh huh, I always thought it would be Rachel.
Joey: Nothing. We just talked about stuff.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are reading a book about things to do whilst in London.]
Joey: Rachel stuff.
(Joey follows Phoebe into the kitchen)
Joey: Hes breathing!
Joey: Yeah, sure. Go ahead. (pause) Oh, me, right!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is telling Chandler about Kate.]
Joey: Ooh! Ah! Okay! (Quickly drags the crib outside.)
(Joey goes to get coffee and Rachel exits as the camera pans to Phoebe and Ross on the couch.)
Joey: Wow! Can I get a copy of that?
Joey: Thank you. Wait-wait-wait-wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is talking. It looks like when Rachel and Monica lived in this apartment.]
Joey: (to the director) Hiya!
[Scene: Silvercup Studios, Joey and Rachel are there to give Jessica her award.]
Joey: Oh, man, Im sorry. Why?