words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Joey are standing at the counter. Monica is flipping a light switch on and off next to the door.]
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
Joey: Ohh, Nothing.
Joey: I know what it did! Nothing.
Joey: Like this. (Shrugs)
Joey: Sure! It flushes it.
Joey: Hey! (Sees Janice.) Ah!! (Janice screams in surprise.)
Joey: And there it is.
Chandler: Bye. (Finally closes the door on her.) (After its closed) I cant stand the woman! (Phoebe is shocked, Joey is relieved.)
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Joey: Yeah, try sticking it in the freezer for 20 minutes. (They all look around and then back at Joey.) Im tellin ya!
Rachel: (entering, with Joey) Hey!
Joey: Hey! Whats up?
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Rachel: Its coming from Joey!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Joey: Hey-hey, whats going on?
Joey: Thanks for telling me!
Joey: Ohhhh, good one! And Yemen that actually sounds like a real country.
Chandler: (to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!
Joey: Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you said youd play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Joey: All right, come on look, Ross can take care of himself! Its not like hes Chandler!
(Ross turns and wants to attack Rachel, but Joey stops him.)
[Scene: The park, everyone is warming up for the rugby game. Only Joey and Phoebe came to support Ross.]
Joey: Ross-Ross-Ross-Ross! Stay away from that guy (Points), and that guy (Points). And that oneDude! Theyre all huge!
Joey: Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you look bigger to you from where you are.
Phoebe: Whoa! (The player leaves and to Joey) I kinda liked it.
Ross: Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross. (Joey and Phoebe dont know what hes talking about.) Yknow, Red Ross!
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Joey: No.
Ross: JOEY!!!!!!
Ross: Thanks. (When shes gone he collapses into Joey.) I-I think Im dying. I really do.
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Joey: The Red Ross! Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, They are returning from the rugby game, Joey and Emily are carrying Ross.]
Joey: Yeah, sure.
Joey: Uhh, look, your eyes still popping out a little, Im gonna go get some ice.
Monica: I guess Joey was right, it does nothing.
[Cut to Chandler and Joeys, Joey and Phoebe are watching TV. The TV is turning off and on, and each time Phoebe is blinking her eyes like the Genie did. The switch obviously controls the outlet which the TV is plugged into.]
Monica: Joey, what are you doing?! Its never gonna happen, shes seeing somebody.
Dream Joey: I love you too.
Joey: Uhh, well, she's really good in bed.
Monica: Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Chandler and Joey are there looking at pictures from the trip to London.]
Phoebe and Joey: Oh my God!
Joey: Uhh, just a minute officer!!
Joey: I dont know! But its the same!
Chandler and Joey: Nice!
Joey: Am I psyched? The lead in my own TV series? Ive dreamed about this for years! Why have I not been preparing?!
Joey: I meant female nudity. Alright? I don't need to see Lou Grant frolicking.
Joey: Boy, that guy's underwear sucks!
Joey: Nope. Op, wait! There he goes.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is standing at the window waving at Ross.]
RACH: Did Joey say what he was gonna go when he left?
Ross: Hey Joey! Great stuff huh?
Joey: Come on you guys, we want you to know we're (His eye widen even more) very very sorry. (Monica and Chandler are now covering their eyes with their hands) (then to the others in the hall) Right guys?
Joey: Tell me about it, huh? (Realizes that she can see Monica.) Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica! (He pantomimes that out.) Ewwuck! (He pushes Monica away and makes a disgusted face.)
Joey: This is your place?
Joey: Ugh!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering again.]
Monica: No Joey, I think he's just watchin' TV.
Joey: But I counted, you're not supposed to live here! Oh man! (Runs away.)
Rachel: Oh umm, y'know I lent it to Joey and I never actually got it back.
JOEY: Have you been here all night?
Joey: You kissed him?!
Joey: What happened?
Joey: (He goes into a song and dance number)
Joey: I knew I shouldnt have mentioned it! Thats what I wanted to name my kid!
Joey: Well you gotta kiss someone, you can't kiss your sister.
Joey: I bet that kiss isn't looking like such a big mistake now, is it?
Joey: Well, you suck! But at least you suck at a man's game now.
Joey: Yeah! (Chandler makes a noise) No?
Phoebe: Joey! (Examining the dress.) Wow, you didnt rip off any buttons.
Joey: Damnit!! Did you move?!
Joey: What are you talking about? It was a big deal. I mean, come on you cant tell me last night didnt mean something to you. I-I was there, youre not that good an actress.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Ross is cleaning out the fridge. Joey walks from his room. He looks like he just woke up.]
Joey: Yeah, I like that. But no-no, how does that explain why Rachel found my underwear at your place?
Phoebe: No, I'm just gonna help him, you know, get 'de-Ursula-ized', like you know, like I did for Joey after he went out with her.
Joey: Do uh, do you got any beer? All-all I got is this melon stuff that Rachel left. I dont
JOEY: So what're you guys gonna eat?
Joey: See, there was kind of a mix up in my agent's office, but I'm still on TV and that's good exposure.
Joey: (sheepishly) I finished my book. (Chandler and Monica slowly retreat back to bed.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching TV as Chandler enters.]
(Just as they start to get up, Joey walks in.)
Ross: Sure. (He opens the door to Joey. Needless to say, Joey's stunned.) Joey
Joey: Look, it was a job all right?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its the middle of the night. Joey is walking into the living room, and runs into the entertainment centre.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, Phoebe is already there waiting for the delievery guy.]
Joey: No-no-no, no, no, wait. You see, Im an actor, Joey Tribbiani, Im doing a scene with you today, and well, I stink.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting at the bar, in their bathrobes, eating cereal]
Joey: He knew we were trying to get rid of him. He knew! (Pause.) You think we could get a bathtub in our kitchen?
Joey: What, what!? it's for her hot friends!
Joey: (to Ross) That-that is a good trick.
Joey: All right, my New Year's resolution is to learn how to play the guitar.
Joey: Okay, pick a card.
Joey: All right now, memorize it. (Pause) You got it?
(Joey laughs then realizes the trick didn't work when Chandler hands him his card back.)
Joey: Luck!
Joey: They're gonna do it together.
Joey: Bikini, French cut, thong! And-and the fabrics! Youve got cotton, silk, lace! And yknow what Ive always wondered about?
Joey: Done.
Joey: You're a dork.
Joey: All right!
Rachel: Thank you. (They hug.) Oh Joey and look at this crib! Its so cute!
Rachel: Joey! I cant believe you just did that!
Joey: What?! Are you kidding?!
Ross: Joey, you look nothing like Ben.
Joey: Okay! Well need a six-pack of Zima.
(Ross leaves, and after the door closes, Joey gives him the loser sign.)
Joey: Okay! All right, I'll see ya. (As he's walking off stage.) (Patting the bag.) We got it! We got it!
Joey: No. No. No. She lives on the third floor, eighth apartment from the left.
Joey: (Jumping out of his way) See ya!! (To the girls.) What the hell was that?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, and Chandler are recovering from Ross's rebuke.]
Joey: (Happily) Yeah I did!
Chandler: Hey listen, come on, Joey is having a problem! A little girl is beating him up.
Joey: Well, I-I just, I just it was going to be like a really cool robot, yknow? Like the terminator or uh, when I first saw you.
Joey: Who knows?
Joey: Well, it involved Monica.
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching! (Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin' this.
Monica: Who? Two divorces and Joey?!
Joey: Man, this is gonna be kinda weird.
Joey: And then, then he could use his teeth, his teeth to undo her dress, and, and, and bite her!
Joey: Hey Pheebs! (To the guys) Hey!
Joey: Come on C.H.E.E.S.E., Im not leaving without you! Try routing your backup source through your primary CPU.
Joey: What? Chandler! Tell 'em!
Chandler: Oh, y'know what? The last time Joey went to a meadow, his mother was shot by a hunter.
Joey: I'm tellin' ya that girl totally winked at me.
Joey: Yeah. I understand. I understand. (Pause) Man, I wish I saw Phoebe first!
Joey: You guys got anything to eat? I just went down to Johnos for some chicken and it was closed!
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey and Sandy are sitting at the kitchen counter. Joey is holding mr. Wigglemunch, and Sandy holds the Grumpus.]
Joey: Oh yeah, no problem.
Joey: Well this is noodle soup and uh, I've been working with tomato. But that's okay, no problem. No problem. Hmm, noodle soup.
Joey: And I was tired from digging the huge hole!
Joey: Uh-oh.
Joey: (angrily) Ross!
Joey: Hi!
Ross: (entering, angrily) Joey!
Joey: (sitting back down) Was the chord at least right
Joey: Hmm, noodle soup.