words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Joey are standing at the counter. Monica is flipping a light switch on and off next to the door.]
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
Joey: Ohh, Nothing.
Joey: I know what it did! Nothing.
Joey: Like this. (Shrugs)
Joey: Sure! It flushes it.
Joey: Hey! (Sees Janice.) Ah!! (Janice screams in surprise.)
Joey: And there it is.
Chandler: Bye. (Finally closes the door on her.) (After its closed) I cant stand the woman! (Phoebe is shocked, Joey is relieved.)
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Joey: Yeah, try sticking it in the freezer for 20 minutes. (They all look around and then back at Joey.) Im tellin ya!
Rachel: (entering, with Joey) Hey!
Joey: Hey! Whats up?
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Rachel: Its coming from Joey!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Joey: Hey-hey, whats going on?
Joey: Thanks for telling me!
Joey: Ohhhh, good one! And Yemen that actually sounds like a real country.
Chandler: (to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!
Joey: Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you said youd play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Joey: All right, come on look, Ross can take care of himself! Its not like hes Chandler!
(Ross turns and wants to attack Rachel, but Joey stops him.)
[Scene: The park, everyone is warming up for the rugby game. Only Joey and Phoebe came to support Ross.]
Joey: Ross-Ross-Ross-Ross! Stay away from that guy (Points), and that guy (Points). And that oneDude! Theyre all huge!
Joey: Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you look bigger to you from where you are.
Phoebe: Whoa! (The player leaves and to Joey) I kinda liked it.
Ross: Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross. (Joey and Phoebe dont know what hes talking about.) Yknow, Red Ross!
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Joey: No.
Ross: JOEY!!!!!!
Ross: Thanks. (When shes gone he collapses into Joey.) I-I think Im dying. I really do.
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Joey: The Red Ross! Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, They are returning from the rugby game, Joey and Emily are carrying Ross.]
Joey: Yeah, sure.
Joey: Uhh, look, your eyes still popping out a little, Im gonna go get some ice.
Monica: I guess Joey was right, it does nothing.
[Cut to Chandler and Joeys, Joey and Phoebe are watching TV. The TV is turning off and on, and each time Phoebe is blinking her eyes like the Genie did. The switch obviously controls the outlet which the TV is plugged into.]
Joey: (whispering to Chandler) Youll tell me later?
Joey: Are you kidding me?! I love Archie! And the whole gang!
Joey: Why would they take away our keys?
Joey: Yeah that didnt sound like me.
(Ross laughs and has a Come on... look on his face as he looks and Chandler who nods his head in agreement with Joey. Ross is stunned.)
Joey: No thats not it. They let me keep my key the last time they were out of town.
Joey: Hey, I washed those!
Joey: Yeah, I have stuff in there too.
Joey: Really?
Joey: Yeah uh, what am I gonna do?
(Phoebe and Joey trade looks)
Monica: This place is really my Grandmothers. (Joey starts to take off all of his clothes, while Monica gets the glasses and pours the lemonade.) I got it from her when she moved to Florida, otherwise I could never afford a place like this. So if the landlord ever asks, Im 87 year old woman, whos afraid of her VCR. So are you thirsty?
Joey: Yeah, it seemed pretty important.
Joey: Please, just-just, just go and talk to Rachel.
Phoebe: (To Joey) Maybe its something you ate?
Joey: Yeah, I dont think thats what it is.
Joey: Oh wow, I dont feel well.
Joey: No-no-no-no-no! Its a surprise, but its gonna be tricky thought because she said she was gonna be pretty busy at work for a while.
(He turns to look at Joey who smiles slyly and closes the door leaving them alone.)
Joey: All right Ill talk in code. (to Ross and Chandler) Remember when the kid sees those two blanks in the hallway?
(Chandler and Joey enter with charcoal.)
Joey: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Treeger, what are you doing?
Joey: What the hell is that?
Ross: 15? (Joey nods again) Your personal best! (Ross takes an Oreo and Joey mumbles, no!)
(Joey throws open his door and stands there still in the Superman costume then slowly makes his way to the bathroom while keeping both eyes on the cage.)
Joey: Oh! Yeah, look there's this play all right? And I'm up for the part of this real cool like suave international guy. A real clothes horse. So I figure that everyone at the audition is gonna be wearing this kinda y'know, ultra-hip, high fashion stuff.
Ross: Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a date on Valentines Day? Whats going on, huh? Girl trouble?
Joey: One! (Pause.) No ten! You said ten! You cant take that back!
Joey: Okay wait-wait p-please be cool! Okay? I work with this woman.
Joey: That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do you do on a real date?
Joey: How are you doing?
Joey: (With Big Eyes.) All right, youre right. Ill talk to her.
Joey: Well, what did you say to her?
Joey: (shocked) What?
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Phoebe: Oh! Here it is! (Noticing it next to the door.) Ooh, Joey! Why did you sign it, "Son of a bitch?" (Son of a bitch is written across the entire picture.)
Monica: How did you know that?! (Runs to yell at Joeys apartment.) Joey! Chandler!! Its time!
Joey: Ha-ha. LookCome on, I dont know what to do or say. (He laughs.)
Joey: Yknow, you look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (starting to cry) I have never known love like this.
Joey: Yaaaay!
Woman: Oh great! Well, tell him thanks. And since uh, Joey seems like such a nice guy, maybe we could go on a date sometime?
Joey: A couple? Like two people? Like (points to himself) one (points to Phoebe), two people?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Chandler are eating the cheesecake right out of the box.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is getting some coffee as Joey enters. He's looking a little puffy, but that's probably from the large number of different color sweaters he's wearing.]
Joey: Youre welcome buddy.
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Ross: (glaring at him) Yeah, thanks. (Joey nods no problem.)
Joey: I couldn't even if I wanted too.
Joey: Whom. (Everyone looks at him shocked.) Thats right.
Joey: No you wont. Look he knows he did a terrible thing and I believe him, hes sorry. But, (to Chandler) youve got one more apology to make, all right, youve got to apologize to Mary-Angela.
(Joey and Phoebe laugh.)
Joey: Oh I think we do.
Joey: I dont know. I might stay there for a few days while I look for an apartment.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Sure. What? About uh, you showering with your mom?
Joey: Personal thing? What personal thing? I dont know.
Joey: (laughs) Yeah I knew what you were talkin about.
Joey: (sees hes watching Baywatch) Ohhh. (sees he still has the chick) Ahh! What are you doing?! I thought you were gonna take her back to the store today.
Joey: Six months? Whoa thats rough.
Joey: Whoa, for like months?
Joey: Have a nice six more months Ross! (Starts to leave.)
Joey: Thanks. Yeah, I figure if I wear these in my scenes at least I wont get spit in the eyes, yknow?
Joey: How long since youve seen a girl naked?
Joey: Im not feeling it.
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Joey: Hey! Look, if it didnt work its because you didnt tell it right! Show me how you did it.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is standing at the counter as Ross enters.]
Joey: Yeah?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen counter and Ross enters from Rachel and Emma's room.]
Joey: No! No! No Ross! Im not hot! Are you hot?
[Scene: The street, Joey is messing with a car cover and still wearing the Porsche stuff. This guy playing street football catches a pass next to the car cover Joey is fooling around with.]
Joey: Good luck.
Joey: All right! Thanks! Youre the best! Now listen, the last day of auditions is Thursday. Okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay? Just remember Thursday. Thursday. Can you remember Thursday?
Joey: (trying not to laugh) That means a lot to me man. (Exits.)
Ross: Thank you. (Joey mouths to Ross, "Youll show me right?") No!
Joey: Yknow what? This is not fair to her. Lets just forget the tape!
Ross: Joey! No!
Joey: Youre right. (Mouths, "I know youll show me, right?)
Phoebe: All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has a boatThis is hard!
Joey: No, Im performing the ceremony. Im not wearing a tux.
(Chandler and Monica hug each other, and then Joey enters the apartment again.)
Joey: Yknow, if they knew what they were doing they probably didnt give you real names either.
Joey: Oh-whoa, what party?
Monica: (rolling her head from side to side) Joke. Joke. Blah! Blah! (Joey and Phoebe laugh.)
Joey: (To Phoebe) Im so happy!
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
Rachel: Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!!
Joey: (shocked) From the land down under? I didn't know that either!
Chandler: Okay, I'll give them back. (Exhales strongly through his nose and Joey just glares at him.) Look! What is so great about that sandwich?
Ross: (To Chandler) All right! All right! All right! (To Joey) We are fixing it.
Joey: (entering) Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food! (Sees that Chandler has a worried look on his face) What's the matter?
Joey: Hey dude, what's up?
Joey: Whoa! For a rich guy he's got, that's a pretty small TV.
Joey: Did you take that tape?
Joey: How do you know about that story?!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is looking at the tape sitting on the counter as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are playing foosball as Phoebe enters.]