words in movies
[Scene: Joey's new apartment. Everyone but Chandler is there. Joey has decorated the place with tons of tacky stuff.]
JOEY: Huh? So whaddya think? Casa de Joey. Huh? I decorated it myself.
MONICA: [looking at some kind of glass sculpture thing] Wow Joey, this is, uhh...
JOEY: Art.
JOEY: Thanks, yeah. I love this but ya know what, it makes me wanna pee.
JOEY: Hey, how come, uhh, Chandler didn't come?
JOEY: Right, I go-, I got it.
JOEY: Yeah. Uh, oh, OH, the best part, c'mon. [leads them to the bathroom, gestures towards toilet, everyone stares, uncomprehending] Heh?
JOEY: No no no, behind it.
JOEY: That's right, I have a phone in here.
MONICA: Joey, promise me something.
JOEY: Yeah.
JOEY: Hello.
JOEY: Hey!
JOEY: Oh, that's OK. You uh, you had a thing.
JOEY: Ahh, forget about it, I'm havin' a ball. How's the apartment doin'
JOEY: Oh, well great.
JOEY: Well OK then. [oven timer goes off behind Chandler] Was that the oven timer?
JOEY: Oh, can you believe they gave Stephanie skin cancer?
JOEY: Naa, you're just sayin' that 'cause you're in love with Yasmine Blepe.
JOEY: Hey, hey, they're runnin'
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is sitting between Monica and Phoebe.]
JOEY: I did. I thought it'd be great. I figured I'd have like, time alone with my thoughts but, ya know, it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.
PHOEBE: Joey, why don't you talk to Chandler about moving back?
JOEY: You really think he'd take me? I mean, we had a pretty good talk last night but, when I moved out, I hurt him bad.
[Scene: Chandler's apartment. Chandler is sitting on the bar, bouncing a ball against the door. Joey walks in right as he throws the ball and catches it.]
JOEY: Hey.
JOEY: You know it's funny you should mention that 'cause I was thinkin'... what's with the boxes?
EDDIE: Hey Chan, is that Joey guy gonna come by and pick up his moose hat or should I just toss it out?
CHANDLER: Well, uh, why don't you ask him yourself. Joey, this is my new roommate Eddie.
JOEY: Likewise. Uh, I'll take that. [grabs moose hat] It's what I came for. So, this is new. Where'd you two meet?
JOEY: Wow.
JOEY: Oh, now it's a spare room?
JOEY: Well I uh, got what I came for. [puts on moose hat] I'll uh, I'll see you guys.
JOEY: Yeah, yeah he is. [leaves]
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Joey stops by. Chandler is reading the paper and Eddie is fixing eggs.]
EDDIE: Hi Joey, what's goin' on man?
JOEY: Eddie.
JOEY: Morning. I just uh, came by to pick up my mail. [looks for the mail on the table by the door, it's not there] Where's the mail?
JOEY: You don't keep it over here on this table any more?
JOEY: Huh.
JOEY: No I just uh, thought you liked your eggs with the bread with the hole in the middle, a-la me.
JOEY: So how you two gettin' along?
JOEY: Great, well, I'm happy for ya. [picks up the orange juice carton and it's empty] Alright that's it. He just comes in here, Mr. Jonny Neweggs, with his, his, his movin' the mail and his, his 'see ya pals'. And now there's no juice. There's no juice f or the people who need the juice and want the juice. I need the juice.
JOEY: Hey, this isn't about juice anymore, alright man.
JOEY: Eggs. Who's eggs do you like better, his or mine, huh?
JOEY: Oh come on. Nobody likes two different kinds of eggs equally. You like one better than the other and I wanna know which.
[All by myself is playing. Chandler is sitting in front of a window while it's raining outside. We see Joey through a rainy window. The camera zooms out to show it's just his tabletop water sculpture.]
MONICA: Joey.
JOEY: [sings] It may not be a bed of roses.
JOEY: Yeah, right Monica.� I'm so sorry.
MONICA: (sniffing Joey) I think that's you.
JOEY: I guess not.
MONICA: I can't believe you thought I was cheating.� (pointing at Joey) You own me an apology.
MONICA: Joey?
JOEY: What's going on?
(Monica turns to get the wine.� Chandler peeps through the peephole.� Joey, seeing something, peeps back.� Chandler ducks.� Monica returns with two glasses of wine.� She gives one to Joey.)
JOEY: All right.
JOEY: Yeah?� (His eyes bug out.)
JOEY: Thanks.� (Joey and Chandler exit to the hall.� Joey pulls out the tickets and hands one to Chandler.)� Here's your ticket.
JOEY: Thanks man.
Joey: So uh, you and Mona, been a while now. Hows it going?
JOEY: Where are you going?
Director: Aw come on Joey, it's easy. Y'know, it's hand, hand, head, head, (very quickly, Joey watches stunned) up, pas de bouree, pas de bouree, big turn here, grand sissone, sissone, sissone, slide back, step, step, step, and jazz hands!
Fergie: Joey says you dont really like his hat, but I think its kinda dashing.
Joey: (impressed) Wow, that was great! You really wrote that?
Joey: I *love* my job.
Joey: Well, they go into the chipper.
Joey: (deadpan) Ooh! Yeah. So yeah, so you know exactly what Im talking about.
Ross: What, now youre not even taking to me? (moves over to the coffee table) Look Rachel, I-Im sorry, okay, Im sorry, I was out of my mind. I thought Id lost you, I didnt know what to do. Come on! Come on, how insane must I have been to do something like this? Huh? I-I dont cheat right, I, thats not me, Im not Joey!
Joey: (smiling) Not likely. 'Cause you see that body bag right there
JOEY: Wow, talk about your bad luck, I mean, the first time you try panties and someone walks off with your clothes.
[Scene: Ross's building, Joey is knocking on a door again. It's again answered by Ross.]
Joey: Rach, these are for you.
Joey: And for Ross, Mr. Sweet-tooth.
Joey: Uh-huh.
Joey: No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Monica, Chandler, and Joey are there as Ross enters with Phoebe.]
(Chandler and Joey give Monica a pack of condoms.)
Phoebe: Dont be so negative! Good God! Isnt it possible that Sorry is sitting in there (Joey and Rachels apartment) right now?!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is eating breakfast, Joey quietly opens his bedroom door.]
Joey: Ahh, wait, is Wendy the runner-up Miss Oklahoma?
Joey: No dude, you gotta hold your breath until youre ready to answer the question.
[Scene: Central Perk, They are returning from the rugby game, Joey and Emily are carrying Ross.]
Joey: No! No, I quit a long time ago. (Pause) Did I forget to you that one? Im sorry.
Joey: Hey, you know, some of those are pretty hard! Like why would there be a ghost in my fridge? (pause). Yeah!
Joey: Hey, hey, uh, who did you miss the most?
[Scene: Coffee place, Joey is there, Chandler is entering]
[Another set of flashbacks begin with Episode 521: The One With The Ball, Joey and Ross are throwing a ball around.]
Rachel: Joey. Joey, something feels weird and not good weird. I dontWhoa!! (Winces in pain.)
Joey: Hey! Sleeping beauty!
Joey: Hey. So where's Mon?
Joey and Chandler: Hi.
Joey: And you're not helping?
Joey: Yeah, you too.
Molly: Nice to meet you guys (to Chandler and Joey).
Rachel: And Joey?
Mac: (on TV) Well, if we learned one thing today C.H.E.E.S.E. is that cheerleaders and high explosives dont mix. (Cut to Joey laughing while Rachel, Chandler, and Monica arent amused.)
Joey: How do you think she's doing?
Joey: (reacting first by jumping up) Dude! What the hell are you doing?! God! (Heads for his room leaving Ross.)
(Treeger leaves, and Joeys dances off.)
Joey: Sure.
[Scene: Coffee place, Molly holding Emma and talking to Joey]
Joey: Man, I wish I had a nanny like you.
Chandler: Looks like Joey is doing allright with her.
Joey: Why not?
Rachel: Well of course I do! But yknow, favorite returning character is a tough category Joey. I mean youre up against the guy who survived his own cremation.
Joey: Yes!
Joey: Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
Joey: Well, I didnt realize until I got home. I wasnt gonna walk all the way back down here with one shoe! Yknow what? Im gonna go find that guys car and leave a note on the windshield. (Goes to do so.)
Joey: For a walk.
(Joey falls on floor and gets up)
Joey: So you uh, have a big work problem?
(Joey comes over)
Joey: Oh ... (Starts to sing) Happy birth ... (sees Molly leaving) oh, see you later (runs after Molly)
Joey: Hey Rach, so can I sing happy birthday to you now?
Ross: Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.
Joey: Molly ... people don't study acting ...
[Scene: Ross's place, Molly and Joey are talking on the couch]
Joey: Oh, I didn't go to college.
Joey: Ok (admits)
(Ross and Chandler walk in, Joey looks disappointed)
Joey: I wanna be mr. Wigglemunch. (and makes a "there" nod to Ross)
Ross: Ok ... (they leave the room, long pause) Well, uh, Joey, I guess we have no problem.
Joey: Well Id be scared of them, but all right.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Joey is watching a rabbi play an electric guitar on TV. Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Boy I tell ya, this little talent came in handy before I could afford porn.
Joey: (entering) (He clears his throat to get their attention.) Hey, Rach? Sorry to interrupt but umm, Phoebe wanted me to talk to you about a trip or something.
Joey: On...?
Joey: Oh man! I have to get those done too?!
Joey: Ok! Stop it you guys! Stop staring! You're freaking me out!
Joey and Chandler: (start to sing) Hey! Happy birthday ...
Joey: (at the urinal) Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and I can't go when I'm nervous.
Joey: Do you know how hard this is gonna be on him when he doesnt get it?
Joey: Oh good...
Joey: Chandler Bing.
Joey: OK Thanks.(Joey touches the hot wax). I touched the stuff
Joey: Thanks. Do you get a lot of guys in here?
Joey: All right let's just do this.
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Joey leaving girls' apartment, carrying lasagna.]
Joey: (dejected) Yeah, all right. (Thinks of something.) Ooh! (He quickly runs out before anyone can stop him.)
Joey: Oh-oh-oh, yeah! (He grabs some towels and takes them to him.) That's right, you take good care of those babies!
Ross, Joey and Chandler: Bye, Emma-Wemma-Demma.
Joey: (sitting on the sofa in front of the tv) Rach, come on! They are announcing the numbers! My God, I can already feel myself changing.
Joey: Hey, I need your help.
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Joey: What the hell am I supposed to do!
Joey: What, what.
Joey: (upset) Will the stable boy never get the princess??
Joey: Oh my God!