words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is eating breakfast as Chandler comes out of his bedroom, ripping his coat in the process.]
Joey: How many times do I have to tell you! Ya, turn and sliiiide! Y'know, turn and slide.
Joey: Look, were not throwing it out! I built this thing with my own hands!
Joey: All right. But, youre gonna have to tell them. (He opens the cabinet to reveal the chick and the duck living inside with Christmas lights and a disco ball as decorations.)
Chandler: (nods his head) Do you mind if we stick you in another cabinet? (to Joey) They seem all right with it!
Joey: Looks good, uh?
Chandler: (reading the ad) Stunning entertainment center. Fine, (pause) fine Italian craftsmanship. (Joey is very proud of himself)
Joey: Hey, the ad alone cost 300 bucks!
Joey: What kind of profit is that?! And you call yourself an accountant.
Joey: Oh. What do you do?
Joey: What? Whats wrong?
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Joey: (to Chandler) Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
Joey: Well, there were a couple of calls last night, but ah, I dont think any of them are gonna work out.
Chandler: Yes, Joey has a very careful screening process. Apparently, not everyone is qualified to own wood and nails.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are showing a couple of guys (Tony and Peter) the entertainment center.]
Joey: Pretty nice?
(Joey jumps up in excitement and without turning around Chandler holds out his hand stopping him, and ushering him back into his seat. Joey sits down, dejected.)
Joey: (to Peter) Good for you!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Monica, and Ross are there.]
Joey: (looking at the flyer) Yeah-eah! 200 dollar reward, split five ways!!
[Scene: Central Perk, the same scene is continued from before the break. With Joey, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler sitting on the couch.]
Joey: Uh, Pheebs, about your mom...
Joey: (pause) Hows that going?
Joey: Thats so sweet. (pause) Im gonna get some coffee. (gets up and leaves)
Monica: (sliding into Joeys place on the couch to try and talk to Phoebe) Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. (gets up and joins Joey)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is showing off the entertainment center.]
Joey: This is the unit for you my friend. Sturdy construction, tons of storage compartments, some big enough to fit a grown man.
Joey: Oh yeah! I got in there myself once. My roommate bet me five bucks that I couldnt, and then he stuck a board through the handles that locked me in. Yeah. It was funny til I started feeling like I was in a coffin.
Joey: Oh yeah? (opens up the center and takes out the stereo) If I cant, Ill knock five bucks off the price off the unit.
Joey: Okay. (he gets in the unit and closes the door) See?! I told ya!
Joey: Sometimes I get in here just to get away from it! Hey, a nickel!!
Joey: (still trapped in the entertainment center) WHAT?!!
Joey: Yeah...
Joey: (getting out) Awww, man! He promised he wouldnt take the chairs!!
Joey: Well, this guy came by to look at the unit and-and he said he didnt think big enough to fit a grown man!
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Rachel, Phoebe, and Julio are consoling Joey and Chandler.]
Joey: (looking through a deck of cards) Aww, man, he took the five of spades!! Oh, no-no-no, here it is!
Chandler: Oh, umm, Joey was born, and then 28 years later, I was robbed!!
Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Rachel: Thats a good call. Right.
Chandler: Pheebs, if she could come back as a couch, wed really appreciate it. (Joey nods in agreement)
Joey: Dude, you dont have to brag! We got nothing here!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler have trading the entertainment center for the canoe. Joey is sitting in the bow, staring off into space as to envision his future full of possibilities. Chandler is sitting at the stern, staring into space and is looking at an uncertain future.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, Ross, and Chandler are watching Phoebe polish the daisies on her bike outside.]
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
Joey: Oh-ho-kay, Im talking to the king. (starts to go to a back room)
Joey: Uh-huh look, the only reason I can over here was to settle things between us! Okay? Youve done a lot for me and my career, I wanted to pay you back so I took you to the premiere but you missed it! Okay, so how much do I owe you?
Joey: Ah. Hm. (To Kathy) Wanna go to bed?
Joey: Will you quit hoggin it!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Joey: Yeah!!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Tag are making out on the couch.]
Phoebe: (To Joey) Okay quick, help me get this off! (Motions to her top.)
Joey: Like what?
Joey: Monicas chicken parm! Ill take care of it. (He picks up the phone) Hey Mr. Treeger, its Joey Tribbiani. Listen, I need to get into Monica and Chandlers apartment. Its an emergency. (Listens) Uhh, gas leak! Yeah oh, and bring garlic bread. (Hangs up.)
Joey: Oh, I dont know Pheebs. Itll be okay.
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food?
[Cut outside, Joey is catching up with Phoebe.]
(Joey starts to walk away, but stops.)
Rachel: Hey Joey, can I
Joey: Okay! (Runs off downstairs.)
Joey: Yes!
Joey: Oh, come on Rach! My turn just started!
Joey: Oh. Okay. Hey, can I ride this outside?
Phoebe: No, no, no! Don't call her! You wait for her to call you (Joey considers it)
Joey: (laughs that one off) Yeah. So uh Ross, well nowwhy did that first marriage breakup? Was it because the woman was straight or she was a lesbian?
Joey: No.
Joey: (entering, excited) Hey!
Joey: Nice.
Joey: And-and-and not only that, Im gettin a new brain!!
Joey: Dude, you soooo need this car.
Joey: Uh Cecilia Monroe, she plays Jessica Lockhart.
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is pouring Rachel some coffee.]
Joey: (quietly) My chair heels itself.
(Phoebe throws another jab, and lands it on Joeys nose, causing it to bleed.)
Joey: Say what?
Joey: Umm
Joey: Oh uh, one of the writers.
Joey: Oh anyway, I just wanted to say how wonderful I think you are.
Joey: (quickly) I dont know. Why? Did you hear something?
Joey: No. It just seems like Ross is the kind of a guy that would marry a woman on the verge of being a lesbian and then push her over the edge.
Joey: Okay.
Joey: (whispers to Phoebe and Rachel) Hey, thank you so much. (They both exit.)
Joey and Ross: No. No.
Joey: (watching the discussion) Hey Chandler, do we know that lady?
Joey: (interrupting) Was his name Angus? (Monica and Chandler laugh.)
[Phoebe slams on the breaks. Joey and Rachel are thrown forward into the pillows in their laps.]
Joey: Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave the show.
Joey: See you in 2003. (She walks away.)
Joey: Joey.
(She turns her head away and when shes not looking, Phoebe shakes her head and mouths, "No, Im not." Both Joey and Ross smile, look at each other, and then stop smiling.)
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Oh thats great! Oh thank you so much!
Joey: Yeah, calm down. You don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come.
Joey: Hey-heeyyy - Look at that, it's a Christmas miracle!
Joey: Oh it was great. Yeah, you get to say stuff like, Hey, the bell doesnt dismiss you, I dismiss you.
Joey: Fine! Have you ever got stuck in a pair of your own leather pants?!
Rachel: Thats right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair. (She sits down in the chair.)
Joey: I said name one!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is being yelled at by her dad over the phone, and hes been going on for so long Rachel is holding the phone away from her ear and reading a book.]
Joey: (impressed) Wow!
Joey: Like-like what?
Joey: (sitting up again) Guys! Guys!! You gotta let me nap! Ugh, Im gonna get cranky!
Joey: Oh hey come on, dont-dont-dont do this! Umm, look let-let me tell you something, okay? Now when I watch you do a scene, Im thinking, "Boy, she-she is a great actress!" (Shes not buying it.) Uh but-but, I am also thinking, "She is hot!"
Joey: Yeah! Okay. (He puts his hands on her face and they kiss.)
(Joey howls in pain and holds his eye.)
Joey: It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pause where you look all intense, you know, like this. (Does this intense look where it looks like he's smelling a fart.)
(Ross smiles and holds up his hand for a high-five, but he has forgotten about his burnt hands. He gasps in pain as Joey grabs his hand.)
Joey: Monkey lover!
Joey: Actually I rent the whole place and, I just got what you meant. Thank you.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (shrugs) Sure. Yep.
Joey: Yeah-yeah, I noticed that! Is that cause shes so passionate?
Joey: That uh, that is my roommate Rachel.
(Rachel stops dead in her tracks when she sees whom Joey is with.)
Joey: Okay, bye-bye.
Joey: Oh uh, I dont know the boat way to say this, but uh never!
Joey: They sent me todays script! They never send the script!
Joey: That sketch you mentioned? Might it have looked a little something like this? (He shows her what hes been drawing.)
Joey: Well no, Im just in a coma. This must mean I have lines! (Realizes what that means.) Oh
Joey: When do you think we lost her?
Joey: (as Jessica) I dont think so.
Joey: Thanks!
Joey: Oh noo
Joey: The airport?
Joey: Thats a really long time.
Joey: Good luck.
Joey: Ohh. Wow! Well how-how, how will you be gone?
Joey: So, Ross and Rachel got married, Monica and Chandler almost got married, do you think you and I should hook up?
Joey: Stupid Gap on every corner!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to move Joeys chair and not having much luck at it as Joey enters.]
Joey: (shocked) I can do an English accent?! That babys going on my resume!
(Joey nods his approval.)
Joey: I call it!!
ROSS: Hey, hey buddy, Marcel. Marcel. [Marcel doesn't react so Ross starts singing] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [no reaction from Marcel, Monica and Joey urge him on] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [Marcel looks over and everyone joins in] a-weema-way, a-weema-way..... [Marcel runs over and hops up on Ross's shoulder]
[Scene: Ross's Building, Joey is trying to find the hot girl's apartment. So he's walking up the hallway counting doors. He comes to what he thinks is the right one and knocks on it. Ross opens the door, it's his apartment.]
Joey: All right, I guess this will be fine.
Phoebe: Bye! (She exits, leaving Rachel and Joey alone.)
Joey: Well then let me do it!
Monica: Joey look its really sweet
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch as Joey enters.]