words in movies
Joey: (enters the room) Hey, you guys, what are you doing tomorrow night?
Joey: Look, my agent hooked me up with six tickets to a great play.
Joey: It's a one-woman play called "Why don't you like me: a bitter woman's journey through life".
Joey: You guys are gonna have a great time, I promise!
Joey: I wish I could but I just found out that I have to be at work really early the next day, so I can't go, but, you know, take the extra ticket and invite whoever you want.
Rachel: (gets up from the sofa and moves to the kitchen but Joey blocks her way) Oh, sorry... Oops, sorry.
Joey: (lifts Rachel up and moves her behind him so she can walk on) Hey, here you go.
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
(Monica points at Joey, Rachel turns and sees him)
Monica: You wanna fool around with Joey?
Rachel: All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we (Joey enters the hall) Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? (Joey enters his apartment)
Jane: (from the answering machine) Hi Joey it's Jane Rogers, can't wait for your party tonight. Listen, I forgot your address, can you give me a call? Thanks, bye.
Joey: (entering the room) Hey!
Joey: What's happenin'?
Joey: Oh, I'd love to, but I gotta get up so early the next day and so, you know me, work comes first
Message: "Hi Joey, it's Jane Rogers can't wait for your party tonight" (Joey's upset and stops it)
Joey: (yelling) Stupid Jane Rogers!!
Joey: Kinda have a... a thing for the Days Of Our Life's people.
Joey: I do it every year.
Joey: I didn't have to tell you that!! I'm stupider than Jane Rogers!!
Joey: Yeah...
Joey: Yeah...
Joey: (Smiling) I can't believe you guys went for that one!
Rachel: Joey, why wouldn't you invite us to your parties?
Joey: You're fine, ok? But everyone else acts like an idiot around famous people!
Joey: (speaking aloud) Please, I was trying to be nice, you're the worst one!
Rachel: Oh, Joey, come on! Please, please! Let me come, I will behave, I promise! I will behave! Please, please, please...
Joey: Ok, ok! Fine! You can come, but don't tell anybody else. It's up on the roof at 8.
Monica: You just wanna stay home so you can make a move on Joey!
Rachel: Ok! (whispering) Joey is having a secret Days Of Our Lives party up on the roof and he sent you guys to the play to get rid of you!
Monica: Joey is having a secret Days Of Our Lives party up on the roof!
(Joey enters, wearing a bathrobe)
Joey: (sounds tired) Hey you guys, I'm turning in. Have fun.
Phoebe: We know about your party Joey.
Joey: What party?
Joey: (looks perplexed and opens up his robe) Ok... I mean...
Joey: (to Charlie after covering himself up again) Nice to meet ya! (Charlie waves hesitantly and Joey leaves)
Joey: (To some people) Hey! Hey alright! Hey, glad you could make it (Shakes a man's hand) Thanks for coming.
Joey: Hey, that's why I didn't invite you. you have to calm down, alright... go, go get yourself a drink or something...
Monica: (to Rachel) Hey! Joey said no autographs! But if she's gettting one, then I want one too: To Monica. And none of this "best wishes" crap. I want "love".
Monica: I guess you have forgotten all about Joey?
Rachel: Yeah, well, I guess I have forgotten about Joey and clearly you've forgotten about Chandler!
[Scene: The roof, Joey is walking towards Ross with a guy]
Joey: Hey Ross, this is one of my co-stars, Dirk. (To Dirk) Dirk, this is my good friend Ross. (Ross and Dirk shake hands)
Joey: It's a science.
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, Dirk was wondering about the woman that you brought and if you guys were together, or...
Joey: Monica!
(Joey, resigned, walks to Rachel's table)
Joey: (To Rachel) What have you got there?
Joey: Ah, let me see! (she hands him a pile of tissues) Damn, that's a lot of guys! Are you a little slutty?
Joey: (browsing the tissues) Let me see if I approve any of these clowns. This guy wears a rug (discards one). This guy's Canadian (discards another). And this guy is in a cult, ok, and it costs you 5,000$ to get to level three and I don't feel any different.
Joey: (discarding all the remaining tissues one by one) Pass, pass, oh, pass, double-pass, pass...
Joey: Nothing major, it's just that, you know, they're not really good enough for you, and you deserve the best.
Rachel: Joey, you're so sweet.
Joey: That's true. But you know what, it doesn't matter because I already know who you're gonna go home with tonight.
(Joey motions for Rachel to lean in. She does so.)
Joey: Me.
Joey: Yes, 'cause we live together, that's a joke!
Joey: Gotcha.
Rachel: Oh, Very funny... Joey.
(Joey leaves. Rachel gulps down what's left of her drink and grimaces.)
Rachel: I just wanted to let you know I've changed my mind: I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna kiss Joey.
Rachel: I could, I could but I don't want to! I want to kiss Joey!
(Rachel goes look for Joey. She sees him and Charlie kissing passionately.)
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: The guy left this.
Joey: Ohh I wonder if that dude.
Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didnt see who it was but (He walks out and closes the door.)
Joey: YeahHey, dont worry, shes a terrific girl. And hey listen, could you do me a favor? When she comes out could you just mention that Im not looking for a serious relationship; thatd be great.
Phoebe: Come on Joey, dont make me feel badly about this.
Ross: Why, does it look like Im having trouble with my misshapen claw? (He hands Joey the form)
Joey: (still looking in date book) Hey! Thats the day after I stop menstruating! (They all look at him.) This isnt mine.
The Assistant Director: (approaching) Hey Joey! Were ready.
(Suddenly theres a noise off stage and the camera on Joey swings around.)
Joey: Yeah. What-what did Tag say?
Rachel: Tag is not the father! And Joey knows now?
Joey: (entering) You opened them all?
Chandler: (looking at Joeys feet) Those arent eleven and a half.
Joey: There you go!
Joey: Pheebs, give me the ring back!
Joey: Uh yeah. Pheebs, listen about that. I only offered
JOEY: Hey, look, I don't need you getting all judgemental and condescending and pedantic.
Joey: Yep. Hey, what do you say we make it a double feature?
(Joey looks at him, Phoebe tries not to smile, and Chandler is shocked.)
Joey: (entering with Phoebe) Hey!
Joey: We know its Ross!
Joey: Uh, eleven, eleven and a half.
Joey: Bye.
Joey: Well that, that sounds good.
Joey: What secrets?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Phoebe are entering.]
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa. Jokes? You guys know they have naked chicks in there, right?
Joey: (whispering to Chandler) Youll tell me later?
Joey: Are you kidding me?! I love Archie! And the whole gang!
Joey: Why would they take away our keys?
Joey: Yeah that didnt sound like me.
(Ross laughs and has a Come on... look on his face as he looks and Chandler who nods his head in agreement with Joey. Ross is stunned.)
Joey: No thats not it. They let me keep my key the last time they were out of town.
Joey: Hey, I washed those!
Joey: Yeah, I have stuff in there too.
Joey: Really?
Joey: Yeah uh, what am I gonna do?
(Phoebe and Joey trade looks)
Monica: This place is really my Grandmothers. (Joey starts to take off all of his clothes, while Monica gets the glasses and pours the lemonade.) I got it from her when she moved to Florida, otherwise I could never afford a place like this. So if the landlord ever asks, Im 87 year old woman, whos afraid of her VCR. So are you thirsty?
Joey: Yeah, it seemed pretty important.
Joey: Please, just-just, just go and talk to Rachel.
Phoebe: (To Joey) Maybe its something you ate?
Joey: Yeah, I dont think thats what it is.
Joey: Oh wow, I dont feel well.
Joey: No-no-no-no-no! Its a surprise, but its gonna be tricky thought because she said she was gonna be pretty busy at work for a while.
(He turns to look at Joey who smiles slyly and closes the door leaving them alone.)
Joey: All right Ill talk in code. (to Ross and Chandler) Remember when the kid sees those two blanks in the hallway?
(Chandler and Joey enter with charcoal.)
Joey: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Treeger, what are you doing?
Joey: What the hell is that?
Ross: 15? (Joey nods again) Your personal best! (Ross takes an Oreo and Joey mumbles, no!)
(Joey throws open his door and stands there still in the Superman costume then slowly makes his way to the bathroom while keeping both eyes on the cage.)
Joey: Oh! Yeah, look there's this play all right? And I'm up for the part of this real cool like suave international guy. A real clothes horse. So I figure that everyone at the audition is gonna be wearing this kinda y'know, ultra-hip, high fashion stuff.
Ross: Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a date on Valentines Day? Whats going on, huh? Girl trouble?
Joey: One! (Pause.) No ten! You said ten! You cant take that back!
Joey: Okay wait-wait p-please be cool! Okay? I work with this woman.
Joey: That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do you do on a real date?
Joey: How are you doing?
Joey: (With Big Eyes.) All right, youre right. Ill talk to her.
Joey: Well, what did you say to her?
Joey: (shocked) What?
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Phoebe: Oh! Here it is! (Noticing it next to the door.) Ooh, Joey! Why did you sign it, "Son of a bitch?" (Son of a bitch is written across the entire picture.)
Monica: How did you know that?! (Runs to yell at Joeys apartment.) Joey! Chandler!! Its time!
Joey: Ha-ha. LookCome on, I dont know what to do or say. (He laughs.)
Joey: Yknow, you look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (starting to cry) I have never known love like this.
Joey: Yaaaay!
Woman: Oh great! Well, tell him thanks. And since uh, Joey seems like such a nice guy, maybe we could go on a date sometime?
Joey: A couple? Like two people? Like (points to himself) one (points to Phoebe), two people?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Chandler are eating the cheesecake right out of the box.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is getting some coffee as Joey enters. He's looking a little puffy, but that's probably from the large number of different color sweaters he's wearing.]
Joey: Youre welcome buddy.
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Ross: (glaring at him) Yeah, thanks. (Joey nods no problem.)
Joey: I couldn't even if I wanted too.
Joey: Whom. (Everyone looks at him shocked.) Thats right.
Joey: No you wont. Look he knows he did a terrible thing and I believe him, hes sorry. But, (to Chandler) youve got one more apology to make, all right, youve got to apologize to Mary-Angela.
(Joey and Phoebe laugh.)
Joey: Oh I think we do.
Joey: I dont know. I might stay there for a few days while I look for an apartment.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Sure. What? About uh, you showering with your mom?
Joey: Personal thing? What personal thing? I dont know.
Joey: (laughs) Yeah I knew what you were talkin about.
Joey: (sees hes watching Baywatch) Ohhh. (sees he still has the chick) Ahh! What are you doing?! I thought you were gonna take her back to the store today.
Joey: Six months? Whoa thats rough.
Joey: Whoa, for like months?
Joey: Have a nice six more months Ross! (Starts to leave.)
Joey: Thanks. Yeah, I figure if I wear these in my scenes at least I wont get spit in the eyes, yknow?
Joey: How long since youve seen a girl naked?
Joey: Im not feeling it.
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Joey: Hey! Look, if it didnt work its because you didnt tell it right! Show me how you did it.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is standing at the counter as Ross enters.]
Joey: Yeah?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen counter and Ross enters from Rachel and Emma's room.]