words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: (nodding knowingly) Now youre thinking you gotta sleep with him.
Joey: Me too.
Joey: Oh man! (Hits Chandler)
Joey: Hey Ross listen Chandler got you out of going to the lesbian sandwich museum this weekend!
[Scene: A Dry Cleaners, Joey is there with Phoebe and is trying to get his picture put back amongst the other celebrities hanging on the walls.]
Joey: I know. It was so cool when I was up there before. Me and Jim Belushi would just be crackin up about something Then I get fired off of Days Of Our Lives and he takes me down. Now hes just laughing at me. Look at him, that smug Belushi bastard, Ill
(The dry cleaner finishes with the customer in front of Joey and they approach the counter.)
Joey: Hey! So Im back.
Joey: Joey Tribbiani! From the wall! (The dry cleaner doesnt remember) Okay, maybe this will jog your memory, huh? (Holds his picture up in front of his face.) Huh? Okay eh-ah-anyway, Im ready to go back up on the wall Im the star of a new TV show.
Joey: Oh well, its not on TV yet.
Joey: Okay, fine, I will bring you a tape, huh? (Walks away)
[Scene: The Dry Cleaners, Joey is trying to get his picture up again.]
Joey: (entering) Hey! So, did you watch the tape of my show?
Joey: All right, lets get me back up there! (Holds out his picture.)
Joey: WhatBut you saw the show!
Joey: Dry cleaners?
Joey: Okay! Okay, look! You-you-you got Harrison Ford up there!
Joey: Okay well that may be true. But, in-in okay, Air Force One the Russians were terrorists! And evil! And plus he kills a bunch of them! That-that-thats offensive to Russians.
Joey: Oh you should, its great.
(The Dry Cleaner stares at him and Joey retreats.)
[Scene: The Dry Cleaners, Joey has brought in a bunch of laundry in another attempt to get his picture on the wall, but the dry cleaner isnt working right now. Instead, a beautiful woman is working.]
Joey: Uh yeah, where-wheres the guy who decides whos pictures go up on the wall?
Joey: Oh, youre kidding me! All-all right, well make sure you tell him that Joey Tribbiani stopped by to drop off all of these clothes. Okay? Im an actor; Im kinda getting my picture up there on the wall.
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
[Scene: The Dry Cleaners, Joey and Phoebe are entering to see if his picture is on the wall.]
Phoebe: Oh! Here it is! (Noticing it next to the door.) Ooh, Joey! Why did you sign it, "Son of a bitch?" (Son of a bitch is written across the entire picture.)
Joey: I didnt do that! Who wouldve done that?!
Phoebe: Joey!
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, I-IHey! I did not go out with your wife! (The same woman from before enters.) Okay? I went out with her! (Points at her.)
Joey: Yeah.
Monica: Im gonna go tell Joey that (laughs) that youre back. I was really worried about you. (Exits.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is going up to the counter.]
Joey: Hey Gunther.
Joey: Oh uh, well I just came in for a cup of coffee to go.
Joey: No! No, I quit a long time ago. (Pause) Did I forget to you that one? Im sorry.
Joey: Great! (Takes his coffee and leaves.)
Monica: Find some! Please! Anything that doesnt say I-I died tragically in France. (Joey leaves to find clothes.)
Joey: (to Leslie) Ah, anything we might of heard of?
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
Joey: The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. Wow, an agency left me its card! Maybe they wanna sign me!
Joey: Hey!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its continued from earlier. Joey is now waking Chandler and telling him the news.]
Ross: Ohh, it's Joey! I love Joey! (Hugs him.)
Joey: Hi!
Joey: Oh dont listen to him, hes just some guy who really wants the apartment, but I dont think hes gonna get it.
Joey's Hand Twin: (To Joey) 14.
Joey: (sitting down) Ahhh! (Slides his hands across the table.)
The Grip: Hey pal, are you Joey Tribbiani?
Joey's Hand Twin: Please, please take him too. (Motions to Joey.)
Rachel: No Joey, look. Trust me, all the men are wearing them in the spring catalog. Look. (Shows him.) See look, men, carrying the bag.
Joey: Oh, Urse... (He tries to take her in his arms, but she fends him off.)
[Scene: The Telethon, Joey answers his ringing phone.]
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (to the rest of the gang) Somebody help me out here!
Joey: Oh, he was this cab driver we had in London.
[Scene: Rosss birthday, Joey is now trying to get his car out while Ross is directing him.]
Joey: Well! What happened?! Did we miss it?
Chandler: (to Joey) I wasnt doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?
Joey: Her name is Dutch, and also Marklan.
(Hearing the screaming Chandler and Joey rush in. Joey has a pan, Chandler has a tea kettle.)
Joey: Sure?
Joey: Well look, Im breaking up with Katie so I had to put on some extra padding. Y'know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she's gonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?
Phoebe: Oh Joey, Im so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?
Joey: Hey.
Monica: Okay. Oh but Joey, come over later because Im going to teach you to make a bird feeder out of just a pine cone and some peanut butter.
Joey: Where is the waitress?! Im starving!
Joey: Oh! Tell her shes not marriage material.
Chandler: (returning with Joey) Hi.
Joey: Ross!! We're having a surprise party for Rachel!!
(Joey exits as Chandler shakes his head.)
Joey: They gave me the shaft all right.
Joey: (wakes up) What?!
Joey: I'll kick that door in if you give me a little sugar.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, continued from earlier.]
Joey: All right. All right.
Joey: Really? I dont
Joey: Check out the rack on this chick! (Turns around to point it out to Ross and finds that Ross is glaring at him. So he quickly puts his binoculars to his eyes and starts looking for the comet.)
Joey: Okay, buddy-boy. Here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm wearing everything you own.
Joey: (entering with Phoebe) Come on Pheebs! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
Joey: (drinks from the glass and puts it back in the fridge) Yep, it's fat. I drank fat!
Joey: Ooh, Ill play! Ill play!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is drilling Joey on the chords as Monica looks on.]
Joey: Well, thank you. So, can we play 20 Questions now? Ive got a really good one! Ive been thinking about it since Kansas.
Joey: Oh, did I not mention? Carl is a guy I hired to be my identical twin for a medical research project.
Joey: Yes.
Joey: Okay, so what are we going to do about this hand twin thing?!
Joey: That is incredible! You are the master!
TRANSIT AUTHORITY GUY: He's here. (Chandler and Joey hug each other in relief) I'm assuming one of you is the father.
[Scene: Phoebes cab, Phoebe and Joey are driving back. Phoebe is driving while Joey is sleeping.]
(Joey turns to leave but stops at the door.)
[Scene: The hallway, Joey is returning from a date with Cynthia.]
Joey: What are you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Im not finished.
Phoebe: Joey stuffing 15 Oreos in his mouth. (Joey, with an obvious mouth full, nods yes.)
Joey: (rushing in) Oh my God! What happened here? Did you do all this?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is telling Monica and Rachel what he has to do.]
Joey: (entering) Hey Monica!
Monica: Of course! Joey wouldnt let you have one?
(Monica quickly dives under the water as Joey enters. He looks a little shocked at what Chandler's doing.)
Monica: Wait! Joey! Joey! Are you okay?!
Joey: Oh my God! Youre pregnant!
Monica: Joey, we have something to tell you.
Joey: He's kinda tall, dark hair, hand looks exactly like this. (Holds up his hand.) See?
Phoebe: Joey, I cant believe you would do that for me.
Joey: I gotta tell you. You're the best in the business.
JOEY: Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.
Joey: Uhh, my stunt double. Yeah, and y'know, he's getting a little too familiar for my tastes.
Joey: Oh-oh, yeah-yeah, I bet all the sex makes it easier!
Joey: Yeah, but sandwich time is right now. (Removes a sandwich and starts eating.)
Joey: Here, I brought you some flowers. (He pulls them out of the bag.)
Joey: (smiling) No, smile! Not that face, smile! Everybody smile! (They all smile.)
JOEY: Hey Phoeb's, I think you're good to go.
Joey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
Phoebe: Hey! You could do a lot worse than Joey Tribbiani!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
JOEY: Ah, it's career stuff. I don't know if you heard but they killed off my character on the show.
Joey: Hey, excuse me, would you mind switching with me?
Joey: Get out! I couldn't stop if a meteor hit me.
Joey: Hi.
Joey: All right well, I'll take you someplace nice then. Look! A guy tipped me a hundred bucks today.
[Scene: The museum cafeteria, Joey is eating with the tour guides as Ross enters.]
Joey: How about 'cause if you don't, his mother might.
Joey: What if I smack my head on the concrete?
Joey: Me?! Oh come on, man! You can't do this! Come on! (Being dragged out by the guard) I'm your hand twin!!
Joey: (Poking his head out.) Havin' some trouble?
[Cut to Chandler and Joey's, Ross is seen throwing the ball into the bathroom, presumably where Joey is currently using the facilities.]
Phoebe: (to Joey and Chandler) Okay, bye!
Joey: I mean if-if you're thinking it's a woman's bag, it's not. It's a man's bag!
(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joeys door.)
Joey: Really?! Well, when?
Phoebe: Oh no, I know! I know! It's the one where Joey got Monica's turkey stuck on his head!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are talking.]
Joey: Great!
Joey: Wow.