words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Charlie, Joey and Rachel are on the couches]
Charlie: (to Joey) So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
Joey: So you need someone who knows fashion, to tell you what looks good.
Joey: Oh hey Rach!
Joey: Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
Joey: Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
Joey: (to Charlie) Ok, you're gonna come back with some very classy clothes... (aside to Rachel)... and some slutty lingerie, SLUTTY!
Joey: What's the matter, Pheebs?
Joey: Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
Joey: Why would you ruin it, who was that hurtin'?
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and Charlie on the couch. Rachel enters]
Joey: (to Charlie) Alright, have a good time. (they kiss)
Ross: Yeah, right! What was last time he met a submission deadline for an abstract (he and Charlie laugh, then Joey starts laughing too without any reason) Well, why are you laughing?
Joey: Just... seeing what it'd be like to be a paleontologist... it's fun, yeah!
Joey: Bye.
Joey: All right, so. How did it go at the fertility clinic?
Joey: So you're ruling out surrogacy?
Joey: So, I don't have to learn what that means?
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
Chandler: (stopping Joey) ah-ha!
Joey: Come on Ross, be a good guy. Step up and do it!
(Joey moves close to Ross and whispers something in his ear)
Charlie: Yeah! Actually Joey and I are going to the movies tonight, wanna come?
Rachel: I don't know, you know, just the way she waltzed in here all smart, and tall! You know, and just swept Joey off his feet... I mean, nobody else has a chance!
Phoebe: You like Joey?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is sitting on his bed and the phone rings]
Joey: Hello?
Ross: Joey! Hey, I need to talk to Charlie. Is she there?
Joey: No. no... eh... she went shopping with Rachel. Why? What's up?
Joey: Oh! How's it going?
Joey: What!? But I already bought my ticket to Bermuda!
Joey: Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
Joey: Well, just wake him up!
Joey: Uh! That's a tough one. Oh! Wait a minute, this happened to me before! Yeah, I was auditioning for a play and the producer fell asleep and... (pause) no wait a minute... it was me who fell asleep... Yeah I mean hey, Shakespeare, how about a chase scene once in a while!?
Charlie: No! There's nothing to explain. I heard you. Phoebe likes Joey.
Charlie: It's just that... I don't understand it... I mean, Phoebe likes Joey and then she comes here to buy a dress to impress another guy...?
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is sitting on the sofa, eating a cookie.]
(Phoebe walks in wearing a fancy, revealing dress, and stands before Joey)
Joey: (impressed) Wow! You look... (drops the cookie)... stop-eating hot! Which is like the highest level of hotness!
Joey: Then don't go!
Joey: Alright, then you go to that party and you pretend to be over Mike. And afterward you come to my place and I'll get you good and drunk!
(Joey gives Phoebe a thumbs up. Phoebe walks out)
Joey: You guys kissed! Oh mythis is huge!
Rachel: Okay, it's missing something. Ooh, I know! Umm, okay. (Goes and grabs a bag, that looks like a purse, and shows it to Joey.)
Rachel: Joey, you are not! Youre 31.
Joey: (realizes) Aww crap!
[Time lapse, Phoebe is playing the guitar for Joey.]
Joey: Wouldnt she?
Charlie: Joey is a great guy, but we're just... so different! I mean, during your speech he kept laughing at homo erectus!
Joey: Yeah, we haven't dropped it in (Looks to Ross.)
Joey: Yeah! If you wanna sing at their wedding, well you sing at their wedding!
Joey: They break your heart, dont they?
Joey: What?! Whats wrong with my eyes.
Joey: You got pregnant for funny?! Dina if hes funny laugh! All right, Ill be back in a little while! You stay here!
Joey: Tell me about it, I feel like Im holding down the fort all by myself.
Joey: Yeah! And also, a little like a French guy. (They both squint at each other.) I never noticed that before.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Who wants French toast?
Chandler: (on phone) Hey, its me. I know you cant stand to be in the same room as me, so I just thought Id try and apologize over the phone. All I (Joey hangs up the phone in disgust.)
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. (Sees Chandler.) Well well, look what you brought.
Joey: You got it. Okay. Now, I can pass for 19 right?!
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are standing around the table drinking champagne as Ross enters.]
Joey: Well, the duck
Joey: I dont know! How about, "Thanks for taking the message." Jeez! (Exits.)
Rachel: Now Joey, what did the duck do?!
Rachel: Hey Joey, what cha doing?
Joey: Yeah I did!
Joey: Where do you think, (pause) Zelda?
Rachel: Joey, did you my face cream?
Joey: What are you mad at me for?!
Joey: You got porn!
Rachel: Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I... (Joey starts laughing in the background) (to Joey) What?!
Chandler: (interrupting in the nick of time) Joey, I uh! I can't believe this is how I'm spending my anniversary.
(Chandler and Monica leave. Cut to Joey, watching the Knicks/Celtics game on television.)
Joey: Yeah! Look! (He throws some of his spaghetti on the floor.)
Joey: (entering from bathrooms excitedly) You guys! You guys! Youre not gonna believe what my agent just told me!
(Joey creaks louder)
Joey: I know. (Joey is sitting in this tall chair that is made up of balls on polls. Youll have to see it to know what I mean.) Yeah, his name is Pat.
Rachel: (quietly) Joey.
Joey: (Pointing at Chandler.) Your different here too. Your mean in England. (Chandler throws his hands up to his head in frustration. They walk away from each other.)
Joey: Hey Rach.
Joey: Hey Rach, do you smell smoke?
Joey: Fine, you want to get the birds, get the birds!
Joey: Look I dont know this baby. I dont know if shes a famous artist or not. You know, and I dont want to be a jerk but youre changing too much around here.
The Director: (answering the phone) Hello. Oh! Its you. Just ah, just one-one sec. (to Joey and Kate) I am going to take this call. When I continue, I hope that there will appear on stage this magical thing that in the theatre we call, committing to the moment! (He goes to take the call.)
Rachel: Yknow, I can not believe you told him, Joey!
Joey: 'Cause I figured you'd hooked up with some girl and she'd left it there.
Joey: Just out of curiosity, how-how much is that boat worth?
Chandler: Okay this is great, but Joey said he didn't want any of us out there.
Joey: Gotcha.
Joey: Dude, what are you massaging an old man for?
Monica: Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
Joey: The vicar!
Joey: Of course Im jokin! I dont take checks.
Joey: Huh?
Rachel: Yeah thats right! Come on Joey; sex me up!
Joey: Good, me too. (Tosses him the loaf.) Eggs and milk are in the fridge. Thanks.
Joey: I dont want to, Im scared.
Joey: What?
Joey: Feminine.
Joey: I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me. They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00 AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot.
Rachel: (looking around) Who are you talking too? Oh, youre kidding! Oh, its a joke! (Laughs.) Its funny. Its funny. I dont get it. (Joey doesnt say any thing and Rachel realizes its not a joke.) Oh. (Pause) Okay. Umm I-I uh, wow. Are you uh How did umm When?
Rachel: Yeah, and-and-and by someone, she means Joey.
[Cut to the living room, Joey is eating a sandwich.)
Joey: I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
Joey: You could?
Phoebe: Okay, scarfs done. (Its not really a scarf, its just a bunch of yarn that Phoebe has tied together. Just then, Ross and Emily enter dragging with them Joey and Chandler.)
Joey: Why would I do that? It took three guys to get the thing in there!
Joey: All right.
Joey: Yes.
Rachel: Joey, there is a perfectly good couch across the hall!
Joey: Oh dear God, let me think. (Starts to sarcastically think about it.)
Joey: Uhh, rub it?
Joey: And deaf!
Joey: (entering) Hey.
Joey: (recoils in horror) Women are mean!!! (Storms out.)
Joey: I mean, the jobs easy and the moneys good, you know? I guess Im going to be hanging out here anyway. I might as well get paid for it, right? I just feel kind of weird serving you guys.
Chandler: Well, I think it all started when you said, "Hey Joey, why dont you be my best man."
Joey: (entering) Hey.
Joey: Because! Youre mean on the boat!
(The Dry Cleaner stares at him and Joey retreats.)
Joey: Well, lesson learned! Rachel is mean!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Chandler are sitting on the couch and chair as Phoebe is getting coffee.]
Joey: And youll be nice?
Rachel: AndJoey!
(Chandler and Joey enter and overhear that.)
Joey: Do you want me to learn?!
Joey: You wont boss me around anymore?
Joey: Nope.
Joey: Uh, boat rope.
Joey: Ohh yeah.
Joey: Huh?
Joey: I dont know why you just dont say left.
Joey: Uh, wow, you just said a bunch of stuff I didnt know there.
Joey: God, its gonna so weird like when I come home and youre not here. Yknow? No more Joey and Chans. No more J and Cs. "You wanna go over to Joey and Chandlers?" "Cant, its not there."
Joey: Yeah? Well, I dont want to talk to you Wayne! I hate you! You ruined my life! Oh, Chandler, Wayne. Wayne, Chandler. (They shake hands.)
Joey: Why not?!
Joey: All right thats it! Youre yelling and I dont see you taking your top off! I quit!
Joey: Yes! Yes! You did and youre still yelling at me!
Rachel: Joey, come on! We just went over this! (She does it instead.)
Joey: This body? (He backs into the kitchen.)