words in movies
Joey: Her first cookie? She has cookies all the time!
Joey: No! No... and, for the record, I've also never given her a frosting from a can!
(Joey looks at them, disappointed about their decision)
Joey: U-U-Um, I think there's been an oversight.
Chandler: Joey, we would've asked you, we just thought you wouldn't be interested.
Joey: Whoo-weh hey weh-hey whoo hey!!
Joey: I gotta a lot of nice stuff to say about you guys, ok? And I know how much you wanna have a baby, you know, and I would love to help you get one.
Monica: You know what? Then, Joey, we want you to do it.
Joey: Thank you! Alright, let me see how I'm gonna start... "Dear baby adoption decider people..."
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Uhm... Aren't you a little overdressed?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment]
Rachel: Amy! Hi! Oh-oh-hoh! (they hug) Wow! You remember Joey?
Joey: That's right, yeah.
Joey: Always nice to meet a fan!
Ross: (to Joey) Oh my God!
Joey: I know, she may be the hottest girl I've ever hated.
Joey: (using a laptop) Oh, Monica and Chandler's recommendation. I want it to sound smart but.. I don't know any big words or anything, so...
Joey: What did I just say?
Joey: Oh my God, that's great! I'm smart!! No, no, I'm... (he uses the Thesaurus) "brainy, bright, clever", I love this thing! Look out ladies, Joey Tribbiani's got the whole package!!
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Joey enters the room]
Joey: Hey, finished my recommendation. (he hands it over to Chandler) Here. And I think you’ll be very, very happy. It’s the longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
Joey: (sounding very proud of himself) Some of the words are a little too sophisticated for ya?
Joey: Of course it does! It’s smart! I used the the-saurus!
Joey: Yep!
Monica: Alright, what was this sentence originally? (shows the sentence to Joey)
Joey: Oh, ‘They are warm, nice, people with big hearts’.
Joey: Yeah, yeah and hey, I really mean it, dude.
Monica: Hey Joey, I don’t think we can use this.
Joey: Why not?
Monica: Well, because you signed it baby kangaroo Tribbiani (Joey makes a 'and-what’s-wrong-with-that' look). Hey, why don’t you stop worrying about sounding smart and just be yourself!
[Scene: The corridor. Amy knocks Joey’s door and Rachel opens the door.]
(Joey comes out of Monica’s apartment and sees Rachel and Amy but does not notice the huge amount of bags)
Joey: Ah, look who’s back! (he sees the bags) Why do you have bags? RACH, WHY DOES SHE HAVE BAGS?
Joey: What?
Amy: We’re gonna be roomies! (she snaps her finger and points at Joey, snaps her fingers again and points to the bags) Come on!
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Rachel is in the living room and Joey comes out of his room.]
Joey: You slept out here?
Joey: But uhm, we're getting rid of her, right? Rach, please tell me we’re getting rid of her.
Rachel: Joey, I can’t do that!
Joey: Oh, come on! Last night I was finishing off a pizza and she said (aping Amy badly) "Uoh oh oh, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips!" I don’t need that kind of talk in my house!
Rachel: Well Joey, uhm look, I know that she’s difficult, but I think it’s really good that she’s here.
Joey: 'Cause we will appreciate it more when she’s gone?
Joey: Yeah, Monica made us!
Joey: Yeaah.
Amy: Oh, I can’t, honey. I’m gonna go get my eyebrows shaped. (points at her eyebrows) I am not happy. (to Joey who has a pizza box in his hands) Oh... sure you wanna eat that?
Joey: (yelling at her) I’M CURVY, AND I LIKE IT!
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is inside, Chandler and Monica walk in.]
Joey: Great, I'm finished! In fact, I just dropped it off at the agency.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: No can do amigo. No, I didn't use the computer. Felt more personal to hand-write it. (Chandler and Monica look even more shocked)
Joey: Yeah, and don't worry. I didn't try to sound smart at all! See ya later! (Leaves)
Monica: (surprised) They thought Joey was a child?
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's. Joey is in the kitchen and the telephone rings.]
Joey: (picks up the phone) Hello? Yeah, this is Joey Tribbiani... Oh, hi! Well, I'm glad you liked my letter... No my mommy and daddy aren't home right now... (looks puzzled) Okay, bye bye. (hangs up) (to himself) She was nice!
Rachel: Joey, get Amy's bags, she is moving out!
Joey: Whoo-hoo! (and leaves for Rachel's room)
Rachel: (yelling) Joey, where are those bags?
Joey: (Yelling from Rachel's room) She has a lot of crap!
Joey: Hey, hey.
Joey: Well, Ive been better. But, Im all right. So you like her huh?
Joey: Thanks.
Joey: Yeah.
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. (Mike lets go of her hand) Well, how's this? (she takes Mike's hand and puts it on her breast, she tears open the sugar and puts it in her coffee. Mike thinks it over and nods appreciative. After that, they hold hands again. Joey now enters, and sees the two sitting on the couch, holding hands.)
Joey: Well I had a great time! Learned how to bake, ate great food, thats the first A Ive gotten since seventh grade, and I didnt have to sleep with the teacher this time.
(Joey hugs Rosss neck and has a look of complete contentment on his face which, after a short while, causes David and Matt to start laughing.)
JOEY: What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?
Joey: (to Monica) We did?
Monica: (to Joey) You owe me 20 bucks.
Joey: Uh, hi. We uh, we used to work together.
Joey: Ooh, you smell great tonight. What're you wearing?
[Scene: The subway, Joey spots a gorgeous woman waiting. He goes up to her.]
Joey: What's wrong?
Joey: Oh. What?
Joey: Wait, wait, wait!
Girl: Yeah. (she gets up, notices something behind Joey) Oh.
Joey: So I guess you all saw it.
Joey: Ah! I'm an actor! I can memorize anything! Last week on "Days" I had to say "Frontal temporal zygomatic craniotomy".
Joey: That one will.
Monica: (angry) Joey!
(Rachel and Joey hug, and Rachel turns to enter the apartment through the side window again. At that moment Joey tries to climb over the edge of the balcony.)
Joey: Wait, wait, we have a copy of your key.
Joey: The balloon?
Joey: Nope, not that one.
Joey: Huh. But still Ross, youre worst day with two women, pretty much better than any other day! Yknow what I mean?
Ross: Joey had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
Joey: Oh, I will.
Joey: The bigger half.
Joey's Doctor: Are you ready? It's time to try peeing. (Joey makes a face like he is trying to pee.) Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait! It's almost time to try peeing. (Points at the bottle Joey is to pee into.)
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, its Joeys second lesson with Rachel as the resident sailing expert.]
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont want to go. Im having fun.
Joey: So youre playing a little Playstation, huh? Thats whack! Playstation is whack! Sup with the whack Playstation, sup?! Huh? Come on, am I 19 or what?!
(Joey leaves to get the copy of the key.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is getting ready to sing. Joey is not there.]
All: Hey, Joey. Hey, buddy.
Monica: Thanks. (Joeys still patting the burn spot) I think you got it!
[Inside Monica and Chandlers. Joey is almost done explaining the situation to everyone.]
Joey: Hey Rach listen, did you know that during pregnancy your fingers swell up to twice their size and never go back.
[Cut back inside, Joey is on the phone.]
Joey: But I-I-I cant stay too long, I gotta get up early for a commercial audition tomorrow and I gotta look good. Im supposed to be playing a 19-year-old. (Everyone stops in their tracks upon hearing this.) What?
Joey: Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
Rachel: Oh my God .Whats he gonna do now? I cant watch! (Drags Joey closer to her and cowers into his chest.) Oh. Seriously, how can you watch this? Arent you scared?
(They walk on. Chandler and Joey start to talk but Ross stops and whines.)
Joey: Ooh ooh ooh ooh, there's no room for milk!
Joey: Have you kissed her yet? Its awesome! I could do it forever! Yknow what? She-she kisses better than my mom cooks!
Joey: Hey, let's go look at it! (They both jump up.)
Joey: Look, I told ya, Im not going to any clinic! I dont have a problem, youre the one with the problem! You should go to a "Quit being a baby and leave me alone" clinic!
Joey: Uh, four.
Joey: You know more than one Fun Bobby?
Joey: All right, me neither! I was just testing you!
Charlie: Oh wait, Joey and I are supposed to have dinner (Looks at Joey).
Joey: Wow, that's, uh, dirty.
Joey: Hey, kids...
Joey: Alright now listen, you guys, we talked about it, and if you don't want to play, we completely understand.
Joey: (Approaching) Hey Fun Bobby! Whoah! Who died?
Ross: Oh, oh, we did say wed stop by this little thing Joeys roommate is having.
Phoebe: Why do you think, she's having so much fun living with Joey?
Ross: Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
Monica: I'm sorry, Joey. I'm gonna go to bed, guys.
Joey: (wipes a little jam from the corner of his mouth) Did I get it?
Joey: There y'go, kids.
Joey: OK. (Ross goes out on the balcony to talk to Rachel)
(They start kissing again and when Joey grazes, she slaps him three times, on the hand, and on both cheeks)
Joey: You seen Sandy?
Joey: Looks like that no date pact thing worked out.
Janine: Joey, you dont have to count down every time we kiss.
Joey: No you cant do that, where would the chick and the duck live?
[Scene: A fancy restaurant, Joey and Monica are there, meeting Angela and Bob, who Monica thinks is Angela's brother.]
(Joey starts to the shower with a grim, determined look on his face.)
Joey: Nonono, you can't kiss Ross, that's your brother.
Joey: C'mon, she's your mom!
Rachel: Hey Joey, will you please set this up for people to put Emma's presents on?
Joey: I think I left a donut up here.
Joey: Oh! My head! Oh! (Hes sitting on the chair, lies back, and puts his feet up for Monica to rub.) Oh!
Joey: This right here is where I keep the pizza. (He points to the chair.) And uh thats where the napkin is. (Points to the floor next to the chair.)
Chandler: Too many jokes... must mock Joey!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Joey: I suddenly had the feeling that I was falling. But I'm not.
Joey: Yeah, o-o-o-o-okay anyway, I just wanted to say Im sorry. Here. (Hands him a cup.)
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Right. No big deal.
(Enter Joey)
Joey: You don't think my mom's sexy?
Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)
(Joey and Ross go into Monica and Rachel's apartment)
Joey: So are you gonna tell him?
Chandler: (goes towards Joey) You know that's not the reason Joe. (Joey hugs him and after, he takes something from the fridge and puts it in his mouth. He goes back to where he was standing before)
Joey: All right, all right maybe-maybe you should just ask her to leave.
[Scene: Joey's room: Joey is sitting on his bed reading DooL transcript when Rachel walks in]
[Scene: Rachels Office, Joey is knocking on the door holding a hand over a spot on his shirt.]
Chandler: (To Joey) You knew about this?
[Scene: Joeys apartment, Joey is sitting at the counter as Chandler enters.]
Joey: I dunno what to say, Ross. Uh, it's a monkey.
Monica: Well, I actually had the weirdest conversation with Joey. He was talking about rules and right and wrong and
Joey: Chandler, you have to start getting over her. All right, if you play, you get some fresh air, maybe itll take your mind off Janice, and if you dont play, everyone will be mad at you cause the teams wont be even. Come on.
Rachel: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is struggling with the fridge. He finally gets it open and falls on the floor]
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Joey: Well, this-this-this was great. Didnt everybody have a great time?