words in movies
(The lights go up on the stage, Joey, as Freud, is talking to a female patient.)
Joey: Vell, Eva, ve've done some excellent vork here, and I vould have to say, your pwoblem is qviiite clear. (He goes into a song and dance number.)
(Joey enters from behind a curtain. The others all talk at once.)
Joey: Whadja think?
Joey: C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad. It was better than that thing I did with the trolls, at least you got to see my head.
Chandler: (running back) She said yes!! She said yes!! (To Joey) Awful play, man. Whoah. (To All) Her name's Aurora, and she's Italian, and she pronounces my name 'Chand-lrr'. 'Chand-lrr'. I think I like it better that way. (To Joey) Oh, listen, the usher gave me this to give to you. (He fishes a card out of his pocket.)
Joey: The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. Wow, an agency left me its card! Maybe they wanna sign me!
Joey: Who's Rick?
Joey: I couldn't do it.
Monica: Good for you, Joey.
Joey: When I'm with a woman, I need to know that I'm going out with more people than she is.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as enter except Joey enter.]
(Joey enters and he's on the phone.)
Joey: (on phone) Uh huh.. uh huh... oh my God! Okay! Okay, I'll be there! (He hangs up and to all.) That was my agent. (He tosses and catches the phone.) My agent has just gotten me a job...in the new Al Pacino movie!
Joey: Can you believe this? Al Pacino! This guy's the reason I became an actor! "I'm out of order? Pfeeeh. You're out of order! This whole courtroom's out of order!"
Joey: "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!"
Ross: C'mon, seriously, Joey, what's the part?
Joey: ...I'm his (mumbles)
Joey: ...I'm his butt double. 'Kay? I play Al Pacino's butt. Alright? He goes into the shower, and then- I'm his butt.
Joey: C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big!
Joey: Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me!
(Joey enters with Monica's paper and hands it to her.)
Joey: Here. I need to borrow some moisturizer.
Joey: Whaddya think? Today's the big day!
Joey: Thank you! (He goes into the bathroom.)
Chandler: Where's Joey? His mom's on the phone.
[Scene: A Film Set, Joey is entering for his scene.]
Joey: Uh, listen, I just wanna thank you for this great opportunity.
Joey: Me?
Joey: Right. Okay. Losing the robe. (He takes off the robe.) And the robe is lost.
(Joey starts to the shower with a grim, determined look on his face.)
Joey: Well, I'm- I'm showering.
Joey: Oh. Well, the way I see it, the guy's upset here, y'know? I mean, his wife's dead, his brother's missing... I think his butt would be angry here.
Joey: I was going for quiet desperation. But if you have to ask...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to comfort Chandler. Joey is absent.]
(Joey enters.)
Joey: Nope.
Joey: I got fired.
Joey: Yeah, they said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Now everybody's gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me, and...
Rachel: Oh, Joey, you know what, no-one is gonna be able to tell.
Joey: My mom will.
Joey: Y'know, I've done nothing but crappy plays for six years. And I finally get my shot, and I blow it!
Joey: Hard to tell, I was naked.
Phoebe: No, I don't think this was your shot. I mean, I don't even think you just get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You've gotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go 'I got the part! I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!'.
Joey: Yeah? That's so nice! (They hug.)
Monica: I'm sorry, Joey. I'm gonna go to bed, guys.
Joey: No, it's just ah, I care so damn much about little Ben that uh, it was more important to see him succeed.
JOEY: No, as part of the audition. See, I'm up for this part of this guy, who the main guy kisses.
Joey: You serious?
Joey: And about this Nancy thing... If you're not sleeping with her, should I?
Joey: Okay, get ready to owe me!
Joey: Yeah, but it's not gonna last. She's too much for me in bed. Sexually.
Joey: Okay, here we go. Ready?
Monica: (entering) Is Joey here?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is holding the cat, Monica is treating the scratches on Ross' back. Joey is holding the menorah over the wound.]
Chandler: No! No! No! No(Joey looks at him)one can beat me.
Joey: Nah, not my game.
Joey: Really?!
Joey: All right.
Joey: A two and a five.
Joey: Well, whats it called?
Joey: No. Why?
Joey: A four and a nine.
Joey: I dont know how to play Cups.
Joey: Oh, I know how we can decide. Phoebe, show him your game!
Joey: Yeah, you did some real good thinkin in there.
Joey: Dad, Ronni's here.
Joey: Well, what did you have?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: What?
Joey: Really?
Joey: Won't-won't that take longer?
Joey: (in a sexy voice) How you doin'?
Joey: Uh, (counts the money) wow, 700.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Joey: I dont know how to lead.
Joey: Really?! Uhh, what color is it?
Issac: (to Chandler and Joey) Can I help you?
Joey: Oh, yoii. What was that for?
Joey: Fifty-six!
Rachel: Hi. (She hugs Joey.)
Joey: Hey!
(They all leave the apartment. Joey helps Chandler with the stroller in the hallway, while Monica and Rachel have their arms around each other. Everybody walks downstairs to Central Perk. The camera goes inside the apartment again, and it pans around. We see the keys on the counter, and the final shot is of the frame around the peephole. The screen fades to black.)
Joey: (answering the question) Althea!
(Joey starts to giggle.)
Joey: Its him, not it!
Chandler: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
[Scene: The street, Joey is hanging out wearing his Porsche grab.]
[Joey opens the door and sees Erica (Brooke Shields). Joey gets a huge smile and Chandler squeezed the dish soap in the air.]
Joey: That's right, he almost could. Which is exactly how I got stuck there.
Joey: No, God, no! No! No no, I'm an actor. You'd probably recognize me from a little show called "The Days of Our Lives".
Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Chandler: Well, Joeys my best friend.
Joey: Estelle, you gotta get me some work. I-I lost my health insurance.
Joey: Yeah, she's gonna live with me!
Joey: You're a dancer? She-she's a dancer!
Waiter: Goat cheese, water chestnuts, and panchetta. (Joey Looks down disgustingly at the food.)
Joey: All right, we have to pick captains.
Joey: "When can you move in?"
Joey: Of course I did.
Joey: Oh God, yeah.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are playing catch with a little foam globe.]
Joey: Hi! How are the Gellers?
Joey: (happily) Okay!
Monica: Joey, did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?
Joey: (in a bored voice) PBS telethon.
Joey: (jumps out of the box) I Gotcha!!
Joey: Heyyy. (They all try and hide their invitations.)
Joey: Oh! Wait-wait! (Reaches inside the shower.) Is it my bologna sandwich?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, (Ohh, thats the last time Im ever gonna type that line. Its just so sad.) Joey is entering, angrily.]
Joey: (voice cracking) Ohhhh man
Joey: (jumps up and yells)
Joey: You know, uh... [Joey moves the pen case out onto the counter.] Chandler got you a gift, too.
Joey: Oh, little party favours, check it out! (Its a shirt that reads, "Ross Geller, Bachelor Bash 1998")
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are returning from their brunch.]
(Joey pulls his hand out and reverts back to intense pain.)
Monica: So that was the baby's room. (They come out and Chandler throws Joey behind the couch and puts his foot on him. Monica looks at Chandler)
Joey: (standing up) I will sit with you Dr. Geller. (He goes over to his table and they shake hands.)
Joey: Well, that's pretty good. But you might wanna tone it down a little.
Joey: Oh!
Janine: Joey...
Joey: What?!?!
Joey: Oh dear God!
Joey: Hey! (To Chandler) Dude, some guy just called for you.
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, hi. You guys got any of those baby chicks? Cause I was watching this ah, commercial on TV and man, those guys are cute!
Joey: All right, all right, all right, all right, you wanna know what I do when I take resume shots?
Ross: Oh great! Hey-hey Joey, do you want to check out pictures of me and Mona ice skating?
Joey: Hey.
Joey: I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just, it's just weird what's happening with her and Ross. You know, yesterday he asked me to fix him up with somebody.
Joey: Uh, no, shes at dance class.
Joey: Sure, neighbor come on in.
Joey: (Looking around the room.) It is???
Joey: No.
Joey: No.
Joey: Im a man.
Joey: Yeah, for sure. Okay. Probably want the first thing to be, never open your eyes. Y'know, because you dont want to be doing something and then look up and see something you dont want to be seeing.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is coming back from using the phone.]
Joey: I have to pee. And Rachel's in the bathroom!
Janine: Hey Joey.
(Ross steps onto the bottom rung of the ladder and then steps on Joeys chest.)
Joey: Like this. (pointing to the picture) Pictures of cute babies we dont know. We..we cant have that.
Joey: Were gonna climb Mt. Everest!
Joey: Yeah, well, it feels different.
Joey: Hey! Hey! Be careful around my Porsche!
Joey: Ohh, well, thats ok then. But, okay my towels for instance. I come in to the bathroom here and my towel is not on the floor where keep it. Its up here on some hook..and smells different.
Joey: I'm always on the swings! What am I doing wrong?!