words in movies
Joey: Not me.
(Joey congratulates Ross, sees Chandler's look and abruptly stops.)
Ross: (to Joey) So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, Joey, and Rachel are there.]
Joey: Twice?
Joey: You guys okay?
Joey: Now, see, I don't believe any of that. I think once you're dead, you're dead! You're gone! You're worm food! (realises his tactlessness) ...So Chandler looks gay, huh?
Joey: (entering with Chandler) Morning. We ready to go?
(Joey listens to his overcoat for a second and sighs, then notices Chandler watching)
Joey: What?
Joey: Check it out, Giants-Cowboys. (He has a pocket TV)
Joey: No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.
(Cut to Joey watching TV in the corner. He makes an extravagant gesture of disappointment.)
Joey: (hides the TV, but he still has an earphone) Just a, uh... hearing disability.
Joey: Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third.
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (to the rest of the gang) Somebody help me out here!
Joey: Oh, he was this cab driver we had in London.
[Scene: Rosss birthday, Joey is now trying to get his car out while Ross is directing him.]
Joey: Well! What happened?! Did we miss it?
Chandler: (to Joey) I wasnt doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?
Joey: Her name is Dutch, and also Marklan.
(Hearing the screaming Chandler and Joey rush in. Joey has a pan, Chandler has a tea kettle.)
Joey: Sure?
Joey: Well look, Im breaking up with Katie so I had to put on some extra padding. Y'know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she's gonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?
Phoebe: Oh Joey, Im so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?
Joey: Hey.
Monica: Okay. Oh but Joey, come over later because Im going to teach you to make a bird feeder out of just a pine cone and some peanut butter.
Joey: Where is the waitress?! Im starving!
Joey: Oh! Tell her shes not marriage material.
Chandler: (returning with Joey) Hi.
Joey: Ross!! We're having a surprise party for Rachel!!
(Joey exits as Chandler shakes his head.)
Joey: They gave me the shaft all right.
Joey: (wakes up) What?!
Joey: I'll kick that door in if you give me a little sugar.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, continued from earlier.]
Joey: All right. All right.
Joey: Really? I dont
Joey: Check out the rack on this chick! (Turns around to point it out to Ross and finds that Ross is glaring at him. So he quickly puts his binoculars to his eyes and starts looking for the comet.)
Joey: Okay, buddy-boy. Here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm wearing everything you own.
Joey: (entering with Phoebe) Come on Pheebs! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
Joey: (drinks from the glass and puts it back in the fridge) Yep, it's fat. I drank fat!
Joey: Ooh, Ill play! Ill play!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is drilling Joey on the chords as Monica looks on.]
Joey: Well, thank you. So, can we play 20 Questions now? Ive got a really good one! Ive been thinking about it since Kansas.
Joey: Oh, did I not mention? Carl is a guy I hired to be my identical twin for a medical research project.
Joey: Yes.
Joey: Okay, so what are we going to do about this hand twin thing?!
Joey: That is incredible! You are the master!
TRANSIT AUTHORITY GUY: He's here. (Chandler and Joey hug each other in relief) I'm assuming one of you is the father.
[Scene: Phoebes cab, Phoebe and Joey are driving back. Phoebe is driving while Joey is sleeping.]
(Joey turns to leave but stops at the door.)
[Scene: The hallway, Joey is returning from a date with Cynthia.]
Joey: What are you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Joey: Im not finished.
Phoebe: Joey stuffing 15 Oreos in his mouth. (Joey, with an obvious mouth full, nods yes.)
Joey: (rushing in) Oh my God! What happened here? Did you do all this?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is telling Monica and Rachel what he has to do.]
Joey: (entering) Hey Monica!
Monica: Of course! Joey wouldnt let you have one?
(Monica quickly dives under the water as Joey enters. He looks a little shocked at what Chandler's doing.)
Monica: Wait! Joey! Joey! Are you okay?!
Joey: Oh my God! Youre pregnant!
Monica: Joey, we have something to tell you.
Joey: He's kinda tall, dark hair, hand looks exactly like this. (Holds up his hand.) See?
Phoebe: Joey, I cant believe you would do that for me.
Joey: I gotta tell you. You're the best in the business.
JOEY: Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.
Joey: Uhh, my stunt double. Yeah, and y'know, he's getting a little too familiar for my tastes.
Joey: Oh-oh, yeah-yeah, I bet all the sex makes it easier!
Joey: Yeah, but sandwich time is right now. (Removes a sandwich and starts eating.)
Joey: Here, I brought you some flowers. (He pulls them out of the bag.)
Joey: (smiling) No, smile! Not that face, smile! Everybody smile! (They all smile.)
JOEY: Hey Phoeb's, I think you're good to go.
Joey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
Phoebe: Hey! You could do a lot worse than Joey Tribbiani!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
JOEY: Ah, it's career stuff. I don't know if you heard but they killed off my character on the show.
Joey: Hey, excuse me, would you mind switching with me?
Joey: Get out! I couldn't stop if a meteor hit me.
Joey: Hi.
Joey: All right well, I'll take you someplace nice then. Look! A guy tipped me a hundred bucks today.
[Scene: The museum cafeteria, Joey is eating with the tour guides as Ross enters.]
Joey: How about 'cause if you don't, his mother might.
Joey: What if I smack my head on the concrete?
Joey: Me?! Oh come on, man! You can't do this! Come on! (Being dragged out by the guard) I'm your hand twin!!
Joey: (Poking his head out.) Havin' some trouble?
[Cut to Chandler and Joey's, Ross is seen throwing the ball into the bathroom, presumably where Joey is currently using the facilities.]
Phoebe: (to Joey and Chandler) Okay, bye!
Joey: I mean if-if you're thinking it's a woman's bag, it's not. It's a man's bag!
(Rachel gets up and ushers them into the hall, as they pass Joshua, he leaps onto the counter to avoid them. Rachel drops them off in the hall, and knocks on Joeys door.)
Joey: Really?! Well, when?
Phoebe: Oh no, I know! I know! It's the one where Joey got Monica's turkey stuck on his head!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are talking.]
Joey: Great!
Joey: Wow.
[Scene: Outside Room 816, Joey is briefing Phoebe on Cliff.]
Joey: Oh-oh, what about Ross?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Chandler enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Chandler are sitting and talking.]
Estelle: Joey, sweetheart, you were fabulous!
Joey: Well, the brown one brings out your eyes, but your butt looks great in the blue one.
Joey: It's two gifts in one. It's a pen that's also a clock! Huh?
Joey: All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, you really wanna know how I did it, Ill show ya. When you handed me back the card, what you didnt see was, I looked at it so fast that it was invisible to the naked eye. (picks up a card and quickly looks at it) I just did it. (does it again) I just did it, again. Here, Ill slow it down so that you guys can see it. (looks and the card in slow motion)
Joey: Look weve got to find her. Phoebe just called!! Rachels coming to tell Ross she loves him!!
Ross: (running into the hall, in slow motion) You'll never get me, Joe!!! (he then pretends that he gets shot repeatedly and falls back against Joey and Chandler's door, dead.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there as Joey enters.]
Joey: Ah, can I just say I know we're doing this for Ross, and that's cool, but if it was up to me, this is not what we'd be doing on our first date.
Felicity: (In a sexy voice.)Hello Joey.
Joey: (pretending to be an announcer) And the winner is Joey Tribbiani! (He then gets excited and goes over to the counter to practice his acceptance speech using a bottle of maple syrup as the award.) Oh Wow! I honestly never expected this. I uh, I didnt prepare a speech. But umm, Id like to thank (Rachel enters quietly) my parents, whove always been there for me. Id also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel
Joey: Hey, whats up?
Joey: At least I care about his feelings!
Joey: I cant believe she would say that too you.