words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is sitting at the counter reading a magazine as the phone rings.]
Joey: (answering phone) Hello.
Chandler: (on phone) Hey, its me. I know you cant stand to be in the same room as me, so I just thought Id try and apologize over the phone. All I (Joey hangs up the phone in disgust.)
Joey: (answering phone) Hello.
Chandler: Look I never should have kissed your girlfriend, but Im (Joey hangs up the phone again.)
Joey: (answering phone) Stop callin!!
Joey: All right!
Voice: What is the name of your roommate who is very, very sorry and would do anything (Joey realizes its Chandler and hangs up the phone in anger.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey and Chandler are there getting ready for Thanksgiving.]
Rachel: So are things with you and Joey any better?
[Cut to later, the gang, minus Joey, is watching the Thanksgiving Day parade.]
Phoebe: You dont have to do that, Ross and Joey arent here, you can watch the parade if you want.
Chandler: (entering) All right! Okay! I think I am making some progress with Joey, when I went into the apartment he went straight into his bedroom but he only slammed the door once! (Ross is pleased.) I mean yeah, he gave me the finger while doing it.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is repacking the furniture into boxes to return it.]
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Im sending back all this stuff that Chandler bought out of guilt.
Joey: No! Im putting that in my room.
Ross: Listen, Joey, I know what he did was wrong but dont you think you could at least hear the guy out?
Joey: Back when you and Rachel were together, if Chandler had kissed her, would you hear him out?
Joey: Five years.
Joey: Hey! Dont do the crime if you cant do the time.
Ross: Joey, the guys your best friend.
Joey: No, was my best friend. Anyway, I dont know why youre pushing for him so hard. With him out of the way as my best friend, theres a spot open.
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: What?
Joey: All right. But if you werent my best friend.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Kathy are sitting at a table and talking about Joey.]
Joey: (entering) Hey Gunther, have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
(Joey turns around and sees them kissing.)
Joey: (Something in Italian.) (Storms out.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is packing as Chandler rushes in.]
Chandler: Hey! Im sorry! That(sees that Joey is about to leave) where are you going?
Joey: My folks.
Joey: I dont know. I might stay there for a few days while I look for an apartment.
Joey: Yeah, yknow at first I thought we could talk about this yknow, work it out, but uh, seeing you two together I dont think I
Joey: Look, its not about her. Okay? But seeing you two together just reminds me of what you did. And I dont want to live with some one who doesnt know what it is to be a friend. So, Ill see ya. (He starts to leave, but Chandler grabs his bag and stops him.)
Joey: Yeah! You did! And thats why Im leaving.
Joey: When that guy was robbing us, and I was locked in the entertainment unit for like six hours, you know what I was doing in there all that time? I was thinking about how I let you down!
Joey: Yeah! But if wouldve know what kind of friend you were gonna turn out to be, I wouldnt have worried about it so much! See you around!
Chandler: All right, wait! Come on! Just wait one second! There has to be something that I can do! Something! If we still had that entertainment unit I would get in it for six hours and think about how I let you down. (Joey looks intrigued) What?
Joey: Weve got a box. (Motions to a large wooden box next to him.)
Joey: (coming out of the bathroom) Whats twisted?
Joey: Ewwwww!! Ew! Ew! Ew!
Joey: Hes fine!
Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, (points to Ross) married a lesbian, (points to Rachel) left a man at the altar, (points to Phoebe) fell in love with a gay ice dancer, (points to Joey) threw a girls wooden leg in a fire, (points to Chandler) livin in a box!! (goes to her room)
Joey: Chandler?
Chandler: The meaning of the box is three fold. One (holds a finger up through the air hole), it gives me the time to think about what I did. Two (holds up another finger), it proves how much I care about my friendship with Joey. And three (holds up a third finger), it hurts!
Monica: And Joey.
Joey: Hey!
Tim: Hi, Joey.
Joey: Hes doin some thinkin!
[cut to later, Joey, Rachel, Ross, and Tim are watching the football game, and they all cheer loudly.]
Joey: You kissed my girlfriend!
Rachel: (Swears in Italian, its the same term used by Joey earlier and Joey nods his approval.)
Joey: That doesnt sound like thinking to me!
Joey: Yknow I dont think you should be talking at all in there! I think youve got to much thinking to do to be talking and making jokes!
Ross: Sure! Oh, and Joeys got the mashed potatoes if you want to exchange them.
Joey: All right, look! If this is just a big joke to you, then forget about it, all right?! This means something to me! And if it doesnt mean anything to you, then you should get out of there, otherwise youre just an idiot in a box!
Joey: So are you gonna start taking this thing seriously?
Joey: That sounds like another word to me! Are you gonna take this seriously? (Theres no response from Chandler.) Okay.
Joey: Ill get it. (Its Kathy.)
Kathy: (sees its Joey) Oh.
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Thats okay. Chandlers the one Im mad at.
Joey: In the box.
Phoebe: Hes just trying to show Joey how much he means to him.
Rachel: Joey, had reasons.
(She gets up and leaves, Chandler waves good-bye with one finger extended through the air hole. Ross glares at Joey.)
Joey: (starting to cry) Open the box!! (Runs over to do so.)
Joey: He can still catch her! Come on, get out of there! (He opens the box) Get out of there!
Joey: Yeah, were gonna be fine! Get out!
Joey: Yeah, you did some real good thinkin in there.
(Joey says something unintelligible and they hug.)
Joey: Now go! Cause you can still catch her! And Merry Christmas from youre secret Santa! (Chandler runs out and closes the door.)
Joey: All right, who got Chandler? Cause I uh, need to trade.
Joey: Uhh, thats not them. Im gonna go call the police.
[Chandler and Joey enter.]
Joey: Well, actually the last place you were sitting was in there (points to the bathroom). Soo...
Joey: (to Chandler and Monica) Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?
Rachel: Joey?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Beth is really, really sick.
Joey: (bends down to see and the cactus pricks him in the ass) AWCH! That's why.
JOEY: 'Cause it's always somethin', you know, like Monica's new job, or the whole Ross's birthday hoopla.
Joey: (To Rachel) Well look, hey, it's all your fault!
Chandler: (to Joey) Well hes probably mad after you called him this morning to borrow his goggles.
Ross: Ah Joey, I don't think you get to pick the cities.
Joey: Oh yeah. If you ah, move your hamper, you see what color the tile used to be. (Monica gasps) Yeah.
Ginger: Joey? Joey Tribbiani?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are discussing what to do about the now naked hooker in the guestroom.]
Joey: And I gotta go sell some Christmas trees.
Joey: What the?! (Joey pounds the table and starts yelling at Rachel, and which is drowned out by applause. Rachel is desperately trying to tell Joey that hes on TV right now. He finally notices and he does his gracious loser face.)
Joey: Oooh.
Joey: Jos there, but I dont think theres anything she could do.
Joey: Aww, man. Thats the girl I was hiding from. When she finds out hes my roommate, shes gonna tell him what I did.
Joey: (entering) Hey.
Joey: Is ah, is Chandler around?
Joey: How does it feel knowing youre never gonna be with another woman again huh? Knowing youre gonna have to wake up to the same face everyday until you finally have the sweet release of death.
Joey: Pheebs, you can't do that. The casting director doesn't talk to friends, she only talks to agents.
Joey: I ran!!
Joey: I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under the bridge?
Joey: Well we have to make room for the fresh ones.
Joey: Come on, please, it'll be just this one more, well actually it's two.
Joey: (to Phoebe) Wow, that was kinda brutal.
Joey: Hey!! Hey-hey-hey!
Joey: Oh, now I have to go!!
Chandler: Joey told you about the leg, huh?
(As shes saying that Joey is to pull out a chair and sit down, only Matthew comes running in from off camera and dives for the same chair.)
Joey: (on TV, finishing installing the Milk Master 2000) Wow, it is easy. (starts to poor the milk) Now, I can have milk everyday.
Joey: (entering, limping, and holding his arm) I dont like this anymore. (He sits down with them in pain.)
Joey: Hey. I just saw a woman breast feeding both of her twins at the same time; it is like a freak show up here. (Notices shes wiping her eyes.) Whats the matter?
[Both Chandler and Joey put their feet up against the glass, Monica doesnt and gets thrown up against the glass.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Rachel is there as Joey gets up and starts putting on his coat.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, everyone is there, helping to lift the entertainment center into place]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Monica, and Joey are watching TV.]
Joey: Yeah. You okay?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Where have you been?
(The ball rolls into one of the goals, and Chandler and Joey listen in horror as the ball makes its way inside the table. Finally, they can hear the birds again.)
Ross: (looks like in heaven) Lighter than air... (changes back to serious) But that's not the point. (Joey now also enters)
Phoebe: Congratulations! I didnt want to say anything in front of Joey cause I didnt know if he knew yet.
Joey: Well, Im pretty tired from lugging the trees around all day. Hey, Phoebe listen, you got this all wrong. Those trees were born to be Christmas trees, their fulfilling their life purpose, by, by making people happy.
Joey: Done.
[cut to Chandler, Joey, and Margha.]
Joey: So Pheebs whats this guy like?
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream right up until you say action?
Joey: Uh, y'know what, were having second thoughts about our copying needs. And well need a little more time to think about it.
JOEY: He-he-he, how's it goin'?
Chandler: (to Joey) Okay, that hurt us.
Joey: Well be there.
Joey and Ross: Go Joe!!!
Joey: Hey. (He exits)
Chandler: Well, thanks. I grow it myself. (Kathy is running her fingers through his hair, and Chandler catches himself enjoying it too much.) Yknow who also has great hair is Joey!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Phoebe are there as Rachel and Ross return from the doctors appointment.]
Joey: 4:30.
Joey: Uh, 10:30.
Joey: Well, you might wanna make a little extra, y'know youll probably be hungry after the sex.
Joey: She was kidding about that right?
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Dude, I dont know.
Joey: (to Rachel) Will you hurry up? Did you not hear me before when I told you that all of Janines friends are dancers?! And that theyre going to be drinking alot!?
Monica: So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesnt mean hes great in bed.
JOEY: Hey Phoebs, if you want, I'll do it.
Joey: Whats going on?
Joey: Oh yeah? Then how come I keep(He notices that the marker board they use has been left on the entertainment center and holds up his discovery.)
Joey: Yeah uh, Phoebe! Look umm, I want to apologize about before, okay? We were being jerks. Parkers a nice guy and Id like to get to know him.
Joey: Look, I know I feel asleep before I could shower and now I dont have time! Theyre just ten blocks away, if I run, I can make it.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey goes up to the bar to order.]
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldnt. I got the stage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned to Chandler.
Joey: Nothing, hes just really believes in that.
Joey: So what are you gonna do?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
JOEY: Chandler gave me word of the day toilet paper. I'm gonna get some coffee.
Joey: Im sorry! Okay? I went down to the gift shop and its either this or a bathrobe! Look, whats more important, the way Im dressed or me being with you on your special day?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is watching Joey read Little Women, Ross is also there.]
Joey: (Voice Over) Previously on Friends.
JOEY: This company was not built on rough numbers. Am I right Mr. Douglas.
Joey: Well, Ive just never seen a guy stare so hard at a piece of paper that didnt have naked chicks on it.
JOEY: Aw, man I'm sorry (starts rubbing Chandler's shoulder). This must be very tough for ya, huh (and starts comfroting him looking for a kiss).
Chandler: (To Joey) We didnt get to the audition. Im gonna take her to coffee and then well do it then.
Joey: Yeah, we'll call that Plan B. All right?
JOEY: Morning. I just uh, came by to pick up my mail. [looks for the mail on the table by the door, it's not there] Where's the mail?
Joey: Come on! Who has the biggest boobs?
Joey: All right, Im sorry. Rach IRach Im sorry. Okay? Im sorry! Maybe I can make up for it by, taking you roughly in the barn. (Giggles.)
Ross: Oh no! An asteroid! (throws the soccer ball off the back of Joeys head.)
JOEY: Olive loaf and ham spread, no mayo.
Joey: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... I think it's better if you tell him, you know. It's easier for a woman. That way, you know, if he gets mad, all you have to do is go... I didn't mean it. I'm so so--ooory. (he pushes his breasts together from the side)
Chandler: Joey! Joey! Joey! J-J-Joey-Joey-J-Joey! (Monica hides under the covers as Joey enters. Remember?)
Joey: Listen, the next time you talk to him, can you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is?
(She opens the door and whips back the curtain. It's Joey. They both scream)
Ross: Things you find in the ocean, (to Joey) You're gonna be on "Pyramid"!!
Phoebe: (to Joey) What, what are they talking about?
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Joey: Dont answer that.
PHOEBE: But Joey, you're gonna be fine. You don't need that show, it was just a dumb soap opera.