words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Janines, Joey and Ross are playing Sony Playstation. Chandler enters.]
[Joey and Ross get annoyed with Chandler's outburst.]
Joey: Maybe I could give thanks for you shuttin up, eh?
Joey: Well maybe I love ya.
[Joey and Ross drop their video game controllers.]
Ross: (trying to act manly in front of Janine) No I dont want to play video games, Joey!
Joey: Yeah! Yeah, why? Whats up?
Joey: Ye-ye, we go to yours!
[Ross looks at Joey coyly.]
Joey: How you got three women to marry you, Ill never know.
[Joey and Ross enter.]
Joey and Ross: Hey!
Joey: Oh, ooh the food smells great, Mon!
Joey: Yeah, hey hey, Happy Thanksgiving everybody!
Joey: Well, this has been great!
[Joey and Ross go to the door, ready to leave.]
Ross: Oh, oh, we did say wed stop by this little thing Joeys roommate is having.
Joey: Uh, some of her friends, yeah.
Joey: (frustrated) Yes, all right? All of her hot dancer friends are gonna be there and theyre gonna be, be drinkin and dancin, and we really wanna go!
Ross: (to Joey) Dude, we were good!
Joey: Yeah, yeah, and the Indians taught the Pilgrims what it meant to be hot in the new world!
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
[Time lapse. Ross and Joey are cleaning the table while Judy and Phoebe talk by the window. Jack and Chandler are sitting on the couch while Monica sits on the coffee table.]
[Rachel is in the kitchen fiddling with her English truffle. Joey and Ross, anxious to leave and go to Janines party, are egging her on to hurry up.]
Joey: Rach, youre killin us here, will ya serve the dessert already? Those drunken dancers are waiting!
Rachel: Its a truffle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch, [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
[Joey and Ross make confused faces.]
Rachel: The beef? Yeah, that was weird to me, too. But then, yknow, I thought well, theres mincemeat pie, I mean thats an English dessert, these people just put very strange things in their food, yknow. [To Joey] Oh! by the way, can I borrow some Rum from your place?
Joey: Y-sure!
Joey and Ross: (faking dissapointment) Okay.
Joey: I know, and only one layer of jam?! What is up with that?
[Ross looks up as if saying that Joey was weird. He begins flipping through the pages, only to find that they are sticky. So one page is overlapping another, making two recipes look like one.]
Joey: (turning to Chandler in a scolding tone) Chandler!
Joey: (sad) Oh man! Now shes gonna start all over! Were never gonna get to introduce the hot girls to the new world!
Joey: Just let her serve the beef-custard thing?
Joey: (shrugging his shoulders to go along with it) Vomiting stories are funny...
Rachel: Joey, God, your apartment is like a hundred degrees!
Joey: Did-did it make you wanna walk around in your underwear?
Joey: (frustrated) Still not hot enough!
[Joey leaves]
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Joey: (to Rachel) Will you hurry up? Did you not hear me before when I told you that all of Janines friends are dancers?! And that theyre going to be drinking alot!?
Joey: Well youre whippin so slow! Cant you do it any faster?
Rachel: Joey! Come on! I dont wanna make any mistakes, alright? This is the only dessert and if I screw it up everybody's gonna be like Oh, remember that Thanksgiving when Rachel screwed up the trifle?
[Joey gives her an understanding look.]
Joey: Oh I am!
[Joey rushes over.]
Joey: Ross! Can I talk to you for a second?
Ross: Oh, uh, can it wait a second Joey? I have to tell my parents something. No it cant? Okay.
[Monica and Chandler make What was that? gestures. Joey and Ross go into Rachels old room.]
[Scene: Rachels old room, Ross and Joey enter.]
Joey: Okay, look, I think we have to tell Rachel she messed up her dessert.
Joey: Look, when everyone eats that...that...Banana-Meat thing, theyre all gonna make fun of her, do you want that?
Joey: (scolding) Dude, theyre not objects.
Joey: Just kiddin, Ill talk to them, you distract Rach.
[Joey and Ross go back out into the main area.]
[Inside Monica and Chandlers. Joey is almost done explaining the situation to everyone.]
Joey: Oh and (Ross begins to open the door and Joey says some gibberish word to indicate to Ross that hes not done yet. Ross closes the door again.) Okay, and uh if anyone needs help pretending to like it, I learned something in acting class, try uh, rubbing your stomach (Rubs his stomach) or uh, or saying mmm and uh, oh oh! And smiling (Smiles while pretending to stir a bowl), okay?
Joey: Rachel, there you are! Come on, lets serve that dessert already!
Rachel: Joey, youre gonna have to stop rushing me, you know what? You dont get any dessert.
Joey: (happily) Really?
Monica: (faking joy. Rubbing her stomach and smiling at the same time, like Joey said) Mmmm! Its good!
Joey: I like it.
Joey: Whats not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Gooooood.
[Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the table, looking at the Geller siblings like theyre weirdos.]
Joey: (pounding the table) I wanna gooooooo!
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Joey: No it isnt, I ate that.
Joey: Nope, got it and I got yours (Pointing to Jack) too.
Joey: Im out.
JOEY: Wow, look at that. The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
Joey: Hey, listen, I gotta tell ya, I feel kinda bad taking credit for this, because man, am I gonna get a lot of credit for this!
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.) Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
Joey: Oh! ah! eh... Britney Spears!?
Joey: Ah, y'know just in general people being gay, thing. Im totally cool with that.
Joey: (getting out) Awww, man! He promised he wouldnt take the chairs!!
Joey: Hey Ross, check this out! (he tries to spin a basketball on his fingertip but he throws it against a table) yeah, I can't do that!
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is now reading the V book, with the salesman watching.]
Joey: You wanna see what I got? (He gets up to empty out his pockets) Okay? Ive got a baby Tootsie Roll, a movie stub, keys, a Kleenex, a rock, and an army man. Hey!
[Outside in the hallway, Chandler, Joey, and Monica exit]
Joey: Oooh, the next parts the best, when that dead lady in the bathtub...
(Joey grabs her and kisses her.)
CHANDLER: [Joey grabs a frying pan] Yes, hitting her with a frying pan's a good idea. We might wanna have a backup plan, though, just in case she isn't a cartoon.
Joey: Sometimes I get in here just to get away from it! Hey, a nickel!!
Joey: Come on, Ross, that didnt mean anything! She just had the baby, she was all freaked out about doing it alone, she would have said yes to anybody.
Joey, Rachel, and Ross: Hey!
Joey: No-no! No! No! You dont tell a Broadway guy that! Now he just thinks Im a soap actor.
Joey: Wh-whats going on?
Joey: No he doesnt!
Joey: They do that a lot. Hey, you want a beer?
JOEY: Goo, goo, goo, waaah!
Joey: Whoa-whoa, Treeger made you cry?
Joey: No, I gotta wear this thing for a couple weeks. (points to the sling he is wearing)
Joey: Spocks birth control.
Joey: God, I just, I hate her! I hate her!! With her, Oh, Im so talented. and Oh, Im so pretty, and Ooh, I smell so good.
Joey: I have actually not heard of that.
Joey: Oh okay, how about this one. I was gonna wait until the end of the night to kiss you, but youre so beautiful I dont think I can.
(Joey slides a plate away from Monica towards Chandler, who hides it under the table.)
Joey: Well he made Rachel cry!
Joey: Pantyhose! Yknow? They way they start at your toe and go all the way up to here (He mimed that and stops when he realized he went to far.) I should go take these off shouldnt I?
Joey: Well obviously this is a mistake! You cant be pregnant! Because you have to have sex to get pregnant!
(Chandler and Joey are loaded down with baby stuff, and Ben)
Joey: What, what is it?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, absolutely.
[Scene: Mr. Treegers apartment, Joey is there to suck up.]
Joey: No-no, thank you.
Chandler: Thank you, Joey.
Joey: Come on man, youre not a potato.
Joey: What?
Joey: No I didnt.
Joey: All right.
Chandler: Oh, umm, Joey was born, and then 28 years later, I was robbed!!
Joey: Yeah, yeah sure, goodnight.
Joey: Come on here, have a seat.
Chandler: Well, I am drinking lots of cups of coffee because Im exhausted! Because Joey started snoring!
(Joey hands her the book and she puts it in the freezer.)
Joey: Well, it looks like it wasnt heeled after all! Yeah! So, I guess this chair is mine now! (Sits down in it and groans.)
Joey: I went back to Riffs. I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee, she brought me a tuna meltt and four plates of curly fries.
Joey: What?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are telling Joey, Rachel, and Monica of their bank woes.]
Joey: (To Mr. Treeger) So you ah, ready for our last practice?
Joey: Hey, dont get mad at us! No one forced you to raise the stakes!
Joey: We did it!!
Joey: Look, you wanna use our place?
[They all turn around and look at Joey.]
Joey: Okay.
Joey: (intrigued) Really?
Joey: Oh well, okay, good luck.
Joey: How? I guess I could break down your door.
Joey: Go get em Treeger.
Joey: No, Im good.
Joey: How about zero down and zero a month for a long, long time?
Joey: (sticking his head out the window) Hey, the fights starting!
Joey: Hey!
Joey: I got a big date coming up, do you know a good restaurant?
Chandler: Hey! Hey, hey-hey, hey. (Joey kisses Kathy.)
Joey: (charmed, but then recoiling) NO, NO! It can't happen at all!
Joey: Oh my God! How many of these things did you have? These are pure vodka.
(Joey makes a sound like a creaking bed.)
Joey: The big deal is that it is the exact equal distance from the bathroom to the kitchen and its at the perfect angle so you dont get any glare coming of off Stevie.
Joey: (laughs, softly) Yeah, the stripper stole it.
Joey: (on tape) Okay, so say hi to my friend and tell him that you like the hat.
Ross: I know, I know! When I was here for Holidays on Ice (Joey looks around worried hoping no one heard that) I was sitting so far away Michelle Kwan couldn't read my banner!
JOEY: "Oh, Chandler, now, now, that's it. There, faster!"
Joey: You know what I want? I want a lot of things! I want to be with the woman I love on Valentines Day! And I want her to love me back! And I want just one moment of relief from the gut-wrenching pain of knowing that thats never going to happen!
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
Joey: Yeah, I didnt know you guys were going to be here.
Joey: I dont know. Just uh, just tell em it was a mix-up with the invitations, orNo-no-no! Blame it on the post office. They hate the post office. And the Irish! But I dont think you can blame it on them so (He dials the phone and hands it to Monica.)
The Director: All right, its time to act, my talking props. (Both Joey and Kate just look at each other.)
Joey: Hey.
(Joey and Kathy enter, laughing)
Joey: It's 4:30.
Joey: Yeah! You don't like Kathy.
Joey: All right! Ill try! But if I cant, you can stay with Chandler and I until you get settled.
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Charlton Heston: (tosses him a towel, motions for him to get out of the shower and sits down on the couch) Every actor at one time or anotheropp! (Joey tries to sit down next to him and Heston makes him sit somewhere else.) Every actor thinks he stinks, even Lawrence Oliver at sometimes thought he stank, Bob Redford wont even watch himself.
ROSS: I know, I know, it's, it's almost...[turns around, sees Chandler and Joey] What do you say we go take a walk, just us, not them?
Joey: Is she great or what?
Joey: Kathy was being really nice and you just walked away. I thought we had a deal.
Joey: (to Kathy) I'll be right back. (to Chandler) What was that?
Joey: Well then, do it better!
Chandler: (slides the juice across the counter which Joey catches) What do you care? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you.
Joey: Hey, no way, that roosters family!
Ross: Anyway, one thing lead to another, and... oh... before you know it, we were kissing. I mean, how angry do you think Joey is gonna be?
Joey: Or ha-ha, we could go over there and pee on them.
Joey: Please dont kick Monica and Rachel out, this wasnt there fault, it was mine.
Chandler: Okay, all right, I'll just uh, make sure that uh, Joey gets her something really great.
(Joey starts wiping lint off of her back, but goes at little too far and Rachel just glares at him. He stops, gives her the okay symbol and walks away.)