words in movies
Rachel: Well, Joshuas coming in tomorrow and since I dont have the guts to ask him out, Im going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.
Chandler: Oh yeah? (He grabs the pad and starts reading it.) Joshua, give me a call sometime, guys like you (Pause) never go out of stylewhat did you throw away?
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is preparing to slip Joshua the note.]
Joshua: (coming in from a changing room) Okay!
Joshua: Oh great! (He tries on the coat.) Wow! Yeah, its comfortable.
Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. (He goes to put his hands in his pockets.)
Joshua: Why not?!
Joshua: Yknow, they ruin it for everybody.
Joshua: Yknow, I wore that cashmere sweater on a date last night.
Joshua: Yeah, it was my first date since the uh, since the divorce.
Joshua: No, no, no, shes nice but, yknow, it just it made me realize that Im just not, Im just not ready to be dating, yknow?
Joshua: (noticing her) Hey-whoa-hey-hey, what was that?
Joshua: Then uh, whats-whats this? (Shows her the real anti-theft device.)
Rachel: We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But its actually for Joshua. (Starts handing out party hats.) Look, he said hes not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! (Hands Ross a party hat.)
Chandler: Why are you in here if Joshua is all the way over there? (Points to the living room.)
Rachel: Okay, yknow what, yknow what? This playing hard to get thing is not working. Umm, hand-hand me those cherries. (Chandler does so.) Okay. Okay. (She does a little sexy walk over to where Joshua is standing.) Hi!
Joshua: Hi!
Joshua: Oh, no thanks.
Joshua: You okay? (Rachel swallowed it whole and is not hacking like a heavy smoker in the morning.) You all right? (Rachel walks away, coughing.)
Joshua: Uhh, yeah, I think Im going to take-off too.
(Rachel spins the bottle and it lands on .wait for it .Joshua. (You thought I was going to say Ross, didnt you?) Rachel squeals in delight and starts a slow sexy crawl over to Joshua, making sure he and everyone else watching gets a good look at her cleavage.)
(They all stand up and go over to Phoebe to feel the baby, preventing Rachel from kissing Joshua.)
(She crawls over to Joshua and kisses the back of his knee. He feels it and looks down, Rachel pretends shes knocking a bug off his leg.)
Joshua: Hey!
Joshua: Nice uh, costume.
Joshua: Umm, that was really great, but I-I gotta take-off actually.
Joshua: Okay.
Joshua: So, this was uh, really fun.
Joshua: Need uh, need a little hand there.
Joshua: You really dont seem like you do. Thats
Joshua: Well, what was supposed to happen?
Joshua: Huh. Oh, boy! (Sits down next to her.) Uhh, I-I dont wear suits to work, and I bought six of them from you.
Joshua: No, no-no, no-no, my point is that I kept coming back because, I wanted to see you.
Joshua: Because I-I like you.
Joshua: Yeah! I mean youre-youre beautiful and smart and sophisticateda lot of this isnt based on tonight.
Joshua: But
Joshua: Okay uh, however
Joshua: My marriage like just ended, and Im really not ready to get into anything yet.
Joshua: Im sorry, I, I just need a little time.
Rachel: Ohh, here you are. I was looking for you before. Joshuas gone so you and Emily are free to go.
Joshua: Hi. (He has just returned.)
Rachel: Oh my gosh, Joshua!
Joshua: All those things I said about not being ready
Joshua: No, theyre-theyre all true.
Joshua: But
Joshua: Yeah.
Rachel: Okay. (Joshua goes inside and to Chandler.) Every time.
Joshua: I do. I do. I love it. In fact, I think Im gonna wear it home.
Rachel: Hi, Im Rachel Green. What can I do for you Joshua?
Joshua: They-they-they can smell fear.
Rachel: Oh, wait, Joshua! Joshua! (Pause) (Comes back inside) Yeah, well, that oughta do it.
Rachel: No-no, that wasnt me! (To Joshua) Well, we should get started. Let me show you my underwear. (Joshua turns at that) The selection of underwear we carry.
Rachel: Yes! I will! Absolutely! (She takes out his license and her license and holds them face to face with each other. She then proceeds to act like Dark Helmut in Spaceballs, and mimic a conversation between the two of them.) Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left my wallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad. Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
Rachel: No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to steal my umbrella, so I clocked her. Ohhh! I cant believe this, all I wanted was a few hours outside of work to see Joshua, so he can go ahead and start falling in love with me.
Rachel: You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, and Im gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out. (Practising) How you doin? (Calls him) Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. (Listens) Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? Well, we found a wallet, and we(Listens) the license? Well, that is a good idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Ill see you tomorrow. Bye. (Hangs up) (to Phoebe) Youve done that a thousand times?
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Rachel: Okay, you guys, just relax. (She goes over to open the door, and as she does, she says.) I doooo. (Sees that its Joshua, not Chandler that knocked on the door.)
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is still dressing Joshua. He is trying on a pair of pants.]
Rachel: Would you like to go to a basketball game with me? (Tries again.) You know, its funny, basketball, because I happen to have tickets too (Tries again.) Umm, who likes the Knicks(Joshua comes in from the dressing room.)
Mrs. Burgin: Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
Joshua: Anyway, she burned all of my clothes. I got away with two things. This suit and what turned out to be a skirt.
Joshua: Wow! That would be great.
Originally written by Transcribed by Joshua Hodge
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, continued from earlier.]
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Joshua: and even though none of the other kids believed me, I swear to God, that duck pushed me!
Rachel: Okay. So, can I serve you a little ofWhat? What? What? (She sees that Joshua isnt relaxed.)
Originally written by Adam Chase. Transcribed by Joshua Hodge.
(She goes down the hall. Joshua goes to put the food away when his parents walk in.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) Well, I just called Joshua
Chandler: Hey, I hear that you and Joshua are going out to dinner with Ross and Emily, and I think thats, I think thats really cool.
Joshua: Hey, heres an idea. Why dont uh, I put the food in the fridge and we can eat it later?
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Joshua: Oh, that-that would be great. So you didnt even get to Italy?
Rachel: Um-hmm. (Joshua turns to look in the mirror and leaves Rachel staring at his ass.) There we go. There it is.
Joshua: Well, I guess this is uh, I guess this is it.
Originally written by Betsy Bornes Transcribed by Joshua Hodge. Minor additions and adjustments by Dan Silverstein.
Joshua: Well, I need a whole new wardrobe. My wife, well my ex-wife
Joshua: Hi, Im Joshua.
Rachel: Its Joshua.
Joshua: Hi!
Joshua: All right, thank you so much for all your help.
Joshua: Ah, thats okay, thanks.
Joshua: What do you think?
Joshua: So, these will match the jacket you picked out for me last week?
Monica: So? How did it go with Joshua last night?
Joshua: Okay.
Joshua: Also large?
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Joshua: Youre into hardcore S&M right?
Joshua: Gloves?
Rachel: Joshua.
Rachel: Its Joshua.
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job, she is waiting for Joshua and practising how to ask him out.]
Rachel: No-no-no, that not Joshua.
Joshua: So (Holds out his hands as to say, "Where are my gloves?")
Joshua: So, all right.
Rachel: So I was with Joshua for an hour today, and he has not asked me out. Its just so frustrating!
Rachel: Me, Fledermaus, great. I really(motions to Joshua.)
Joshua: This is so nice. Thank you for doing this.
Joshua: Oh my God!
Joshua: Behind you?
Joshua: Great! Oh, it all looks sooo good!
Joshua: Uhh, Rachel, my parents
Joshua: Yeah, theyre out of town.
Joshua: Okay, thats-thats not funny. Uhh.
Joshua: Oh, theyre working on this week, its a total mess. But uh, Im staying at my parents house, we could go there.
Joshua: Oh yeah, yeah uh, its down the hall and uh, second door to your left.
Joshua: Yeah, yeah, let me show you around. This is the uh, downstairs living room.
Joshua: Oh my God!
Joshua: There you go.
Joshua: Nothing I uh, its just that I know that theyre still out there.
Rachel: I know isnt it? Its like Im right there with Joshua.
The Cigarette Guy: Hi, Im Joshua, Im here to pick up Rachel.
Joshua: I-I gotta say, I-I-I-Im not too sure I agree with that.
Joshua: (sitting) You okay?
Joshua: Great!
Joshua: Do I?
Joshua: (entering) Hey, Rachel.
Joshua: I gotta go.
Joshua: What?! (Gunther is listening in.)
Rachel: Or Ill give them to my new boyfriend, Joshua.
Rachel: Well, I didnt see Joshua last night, but I did punch a girl in the face.
Joshua: (coming back in) Im sorry.
Ross: Joshua guy at that club, dancing and having a good time, the thought of it kinda yknow.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is waiting impatiently for Joshua.]
Rachel: Yknow who doesnt even like dirty movies? My new boyfriend Joshua.
Rachel: Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua the first time tonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing. (Shes holding two frilly, lace nighties.)
Joshua: Gloves. Brown, leather dress gloves.
Joshua: Yeah, well, it wouldve been, but uh, my parents just moved here.
Joshua: Wow! Uhh, Rachel uhh, youre a real special lady, but my divorce isnt final yet and, and, and weve been on four days, so Im thinking "No, but thanks."
Rachel: ...And so then I realized. All this stuff I had been doing. proposing to Joshua, lying to Ross about why I couldnt come to the wedding. Was all just a way of...
Joshua: Mom, Dad, what are you guys doing here?
Joshua: Whats up? Youre voice sounded all squeaky on the phone.
Joshua: Umm, this may be a little weird, but I-I-I got a date here.
Rachel: Handling it? What do you mean, handling it? Theres nothing to handle. Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasnt for me and Joshua. Yknow, theyre not gonna get married anyway!
(Mr. Waltham admires Joshuas butt as he leaves.)
Joshua: Thanks. (He starts to leave) Maybe Ill see in the spring, with the uh, yknow, for the uh, bathing suits.
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, Rachel and Joshua are entering.]
Mr. Waltham: Rachel, one of your customers seems to have left his billfold. A Joshua Bergen.
Joshua: Huh. (She starts brushing the lint off and checking him out in the mirror.) Yeah?
(Its a really good-looking man, Joshua, that Rachel has an instant crush on. Well actually its Tate Donovan, so its not like shes really testing her acting skills.)
Rachel: I mean maybe you didnt hear about a serious relationship called me and Joshua?
Joshua: Yeah, that would be fantastic! My-my nephew is crazy about the Knicks! This is fantastic, thank you so much Rachel. (He takes the tickets and leaves as Mr. Waltham returns.)