words in movies
Chandler: It is going to be perfect. I am taking her to her favorite restaurant. Im going to get her a bottle of the champagne that she really loves; therefore knows how expensive it is. Then when the glasses are full, instead of proposing a toast Im just gonna propose.
Chandler: Im not gonna mess it up.
Rachel: Oh my God, Im so sorry.
Joey: Hey, yknow what? Ill come too. Im making money now; its about time I give something back.
Ross: Im sorry, its just one of my last nights together before she leaves for campto be a counselor!
All: Yeah! Yeah, sort of. Im sorry.
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
{Transcribers Note: Elizabeth has two friends in the room with her who are named in the credits, but not in this scene. So Im just gonna guess since it doesnt matter one way or the other. (The last part is to discourage e-mails, who cares if I got it right or not?)}
Chandler: Yes! Yes! Im good! Are you good? Are you good? Is everythingare youare you perrr-perfect?!
Monica: Yeah. Im okay. Im actuallyIm a little cold, can I have your jacket?
Chandler: Yes! Im fine. In fact Ive been fine for a long time now and I think, the reason is you.
Chandler: What?! Im Chandler! (She nods towards the doorway, Chandler turns and looks) Oh, thats Richard!
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Richards Date: Hi, Im Lisa.
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Phoebe: Im just helping the kids!
Joey: So uh listen, I think Im gonna take off now. (Starts to get up.)
Ross: Okay umm, bad stuff. Well, Im-Im 12 years older than she is.
Chandler: Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, but now youve ruined it!
Richard: Actually, Im not here to complement the chef.
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Monica: Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, in fact, Im the one thats making him wait!
Rachel: No! Im so happy for them!
Rachel: Im so happy and not at all jealous.
Rachel: I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I mean whats 2%? Thats nothing.
Phoebe: Totally. Im like 90/10.
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
Monica: Im just having one of those days where you realize youre in a dead-end relationship!
Monica: Its not like I want to get married tomorrow! Its just that I-Id like to believe that Im in a relationship thats actually going somewhere, that Im not just wasting my time!
Monica: What does he think? Does he think Im just gonna wait around for nothing?
Rachel: Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
Chandler: Hes not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! Im supposed to do that!
Chandler: Well what Yknow what Im gonna do? Im gonna go over there; Im gonna kick his ass! (Pause) Will you help me?!
Chandler: Okay. (Starts running for the bedroom) Im gonna get the ring! Im gonna get the ring! (Does so) Im gonna go find her and (starts running for the door) Im just going to propose!
Monica: I dont know why Im here.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Im talking about massages.
(She turns her head away and when shes not looking, Phoebe shakes her head and mouths, "No, Im not." Both Joey and Ross smile, look at each other, and then stop smiling.)
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Chandler: Where is she? Im not scared of you! (Averts his eyes and walks in.)
Richard: Well Im sorry.
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Monica: Im gonna miss you so much.
Monica: The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own for a while!
Joey: Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now Im not good with the jokes like Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple. I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybody knows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys. (pointing at everyone.) But not as much as I love America. (Looking at Chandler.) Could we please..go home now?
Monica: Im not talking to her!
Rachel: Im unpacking!
Monica: Man, I feel like Im coming down with something.
Rachel: Well, Phoebe thats fine because Im not moving.
Monica: Im really gonna miss you.
Chandler: Im just trying to help you out! Okay? I wanna make sure that youre okay.
Mr. Treeger:: Ahh, thanks but no. You see I-I think Im ready to dance with girls.
Rachel: Im sorry, I just cant go to the hospital lookin like this.
Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Joey: Oh my God, Im sorry, Im being so rude. (Turns to Rachel.) Rachel, would like a soda or something? Because Chandler would run right out and get it.
Chandler: Im sorry man, theres never a good time to (pauses) stop catching on fire.
Rachel: (goes over and hits her head on the post) Look at that! (repeats) Look at that! (repeats) We all do it. (repeats) Okay, Im stopping now.
Chandler: Oh my God! If you say that one more time, Im gonna break up with you!
Ross: (entering) Hey, uh, Im really, really sorry about what happened in the cafeteria today.
Ross: Uh actually, sorry I cant even make it. Im seeing Mona again tonight.
Joey: Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani! (To Rachel) And this is what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read a lot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
Joey: Im a man.
Rachel: Yeah, Im just mad!
Chandler: Youd think that would embarrass me, but you see Im maxed out.
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Joey: Oh, dude Im so sorry!
Monica: No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I got married, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the two of you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know I probably dont say it enough, but I love you. (Pretends to cry hoping her parents will join her.) When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought of those who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to be here, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look how cute she is. (Holds up the picture and pretends to cry again). Was. (To an old man by the stage.) Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her and Nana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to her children in Terms of Endearment? (Chandler covers his ears) Didnt see that? No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutes these orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love. (Waits for people to cry, but doesnt get any tears.) You people are made of stone! Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
Joey: Hey no-no-no-no! Its cool! Its cool! I-Ill only be a second, Im still with my brides maid, I justWhere are those condoms you brought?
Joey: Felicity and I, were watching My Giant, and I was thinking, "Im never gonna be as good an actor as that giant." Do you think Im just wasting my life with this acting thing?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, 3:02 A.M., Chandler is up. There's a knock on the door and Chandler answers it.]
Monica: Guys, please, Im just gonna have dinner with him. Okay?
Chandler: No I-I-Im fine.
Rachel: Yeah, yeah I think Im gonna find my own place.
Ross: I I do, I do not love Rachel. Im gonna tell her right now about the whole thing so we can get this marriage annulled as fast as possible. Okay? Would I do that if I loved her?
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Excuse me? Could you help me with something? The patient Im looking for has a broken leg and is in a wheelchair. And umm, hes like early to mid-thirties, very attractive.
Chandler: Look, I thought about it too, and Im sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
Rachel: Im talking about a bet, winner takes all.
Elizabeth: Yknow what daddy? If you dont like Ross, thats fine. It doesnt matter to me, Im gonna go out with him anyway.
Mike: Oh wow! Im free for her!
Monica: Aw, Im sorry sweetie that she doesnt feel the same way.
Ross: Im trying. (He strains to move his feet.)
Chandler: I can save you time ladies, Im right here.
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it .Oh My God, Im a women!!!
Chandler: To her face? Look its the end of the date, Im standing there, I know all shes waiting for is for me to say Ill call her and its just y'know, comes out. I cant help it, its a compulsion.
Ross: Theres nothing the matter with me. See, Im not completely devoid of sentiment, see I have feelings.
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Phoebe: Im going to let him.
Chandler: Okay, Im a rookie. I should not be in the end zone.
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Ross: Fine, Im mentally unstable.
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
Joey: Well uh, she didnt want to hang out with you guys two nights in a row. Im so sorry.
Rachel: What?! No! Im not gonna move out!
Joey: Listen uh, Im really sorry, it looks like Im gonna be stuck here for a while. I got the transmission fluid, but when I went to put it in the car, the transmission wasnt there!
Monica: I need two. Im bringing Pete. My boyfriend. I have a boyfriend now!
Rachel: Well its only different if he wants it to be. I mean, Im not gonna ask him for anything.
Rachel: No, Im just kidding I would never do that to you! Okay, everybody, its trifle time!
Monica: Now come on. (They hug like men.) Well, Im glad we worked things out.
Joey: It cant be me, Im standing right here.
Chandler: I wasnt sure which one Mary-Angela was. (all of Joeys sisters gasp) Look, Im sorry okay, I was really drunk, and you all look really similar.
Chandler: (happily) Im off the list. (Sits on the couch.)
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry. (Gets up and moves.)
Joey: Im not answering that.
Phoebe: (giggles) Im pretty.
Chandler: Im so sorry youre sick.
Joey: Yeah! Much! Listen uh, not that Im yknow insecure about my manhood or anything yknow, but I think I need to hook up with a woman like right now.
Jill: Oh, thats so great! Okay, Im really gonna do this! I dont know how to thank you guys.
Rachel: Im just visiting my good friend Carol.
Joey: (jumping up and removing the bandages) Im back baby! Ha-ha-ha!
Jill: (entering) Sorry Im late, whats up?
Phoebe: No. Im just, I wanna, I need to be alone.
Phoebe: Oh, Im flaky. Ill say anything.
(They start the routine. However hard I try, I really cannot describe it. You will have to watch it. Im sorry.)
Monica: (entering) Chandler, I think Im sick.
Pete: Now, nooo! Im just excited about the restaurant, thats all.
Rachel: All right, Im sorry. Im sorry I didnt tell you but you were so mad already!
Pete: I know Im no John Bon Jovi, (Monica laughs) or someone who find attractive, Im just, I think, y'know, that you might end up feeling differently.
Monica: Oh no its not, no its not. Its a first date. Im sure that nothing is gonna (as she is talking we see Ross close his drapes.)
Chandler: Im good.
Joey: An-an-anyway I-I just wanted to say that since Im getting your brain when you leave the show, I was wondering if there was any tips you can give me
Monica: I dont need a tissue! Im fine-d!
Rachel: Im not telling you what to do! I am telling you what not to do!
Ross: Look, you guys, you guys should go. (Joey tries to say something, but Ross cuts him off.) No, Im, you, you planned this all out, and I dont want to ruin it, so you guys should just go.
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Ursula: No Im not.
Phoebe: Look, Im talking right now! Youreyou mean her.
Housekeeper: Im afraid, Im not at liberty to divulge that information.
Joey: Ross, you should know that my pants are startin to come down and Im not wearing any underwear!
Ross: Im gonna call after you!
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry. Ross Tillman.
Ross: Good-good, Im-Im married. (Shows her his ring.)
Ross: Ah, well, it means that I can sell cookies, but Im not invited to sleep-overs.
Chandler: Look I never should have kissed your girlfriend, but Im (Joey hangs up the phone again.)
Rachel: Well, he didnt say, but it was a fire. Im guessing not very good. Come on, we gotta go!
Rachel: Im going for a walk.
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Guy: Oh, its you. I see you everywhere. Im Jim, Jim Nelson.
Dr. Roger: Im sorry sweetie, its the hospital. The food looks great, maybe save me some?
Chandler: Im full, and yet I know if I stop eating this, Ill regret it.
Joey: Oh, and plus Im 1/16th Portuguese.
Rachel: God Im just a horrible person.
Monica: Well, Id like to but, (extremely quietly) Im not sure we have time to go.