words in movies
Phoebe: You guys, why didnt you tell me you were eloping?
Joey: Oh, ah, tour guide at the museum. Yeah, Ross got it for me.
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Phoebe: Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be the surrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just the oven, its totally their bun.
Kathy: Umm, (moves her hands down to his butt) I love this touchy. Can I take it to work with me?
Phoebe Sr: Oh, thats okay, it gave me time to finish glazing my nipples.
Phoebe Sr: Hey! Okay! Well thanks for coming out to see me. I just-I just thought it would be a very good idea to talk about this baby stuff in person. Yknow
Phoebe Sr: I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on you and everything now, but umm, (Sees that Phoebe isnt paying attention and is busy mimicking the puppy.) uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy, its very important.
Phoebe Sr: I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, it would be like a million times harder to give up a child. (Phoebe is playing with the puppy again, and not listening) I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
Tour Guide: Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coats and blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist in the classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, but now (Turns around) Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared my puddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack! (to Joey) See, he pretend he dont even here me!
Ross: But hey, its not just me, I mean the scientists and the tour guides never sit together.
Ross: Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Where you work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the other chefs, right?
Monica: I eat by myself in the alley because everybody hates me.
Chandler: It was fine, yknow? But she didnt agree with me as strongly as she agreed with Joey. She was more like, "I see you point, Im all right with it."
Chandler: Look, you have to help me! Okay? I mean, I know what to do with a woman, yknow, I know where everything goes, its always nice. But I need to know what makes it go from nice to, "My God! Somebodys killing her in there!"
Monica: All right, Im gonna show you something a lot of guys dont know. Rach, give me that pad, please? (She does so and Monica starts drawing on it) All right. Now
Rachel: Let me see that. (Monica shows her) Oh, yeah.
Ross: Thank you, Dr. Phillips, but Im having my lunch at this table, here in the middle. Im having lunch right here, with my good friend Joey, if hell sit with me.
Another Tour Guide: (standing up and removing his coat) Im Ted, and I just moved here a month ago, and New York really scares me.
Frank: Oh, hes so cute, he reminds me of my old dog, Tumour.
Ross: Well, you can help me!
RACHEL: Now I'm mommy in this little play? Alright look, I refuse to get sucked into this like, weird little Geller dimension thing OK. So I'm gonna go and take a nice long hot bubble bath because you kids are driving me crazy. [goes in the bathroom]
Rachel: Let me finish.
JOEY: See after the scene, Mr. Beatty comes up to me and says 'good actor, bad kisser'. Can you believe that, me not a good kisser, that's like, like Mother Theresa, not a good mother.
Phoebe: Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have to respect her decision. Right?
Kathy: Ill tell you what, Chandler, why dont you call me when you grow up!
Chandler: Oh yeah, me too. Y'know if this shirt is dirty. (Smells it.) Yep.
Joey: Now? You want me to go over there now?
Mr. Geller: (Forcefully.) Hey, you keep pushing me on this, my foots going to meet the middle of your ass.
Rachel: Ohhh, yeah, me too.
Melissa: Im sorry Ray-ray. I mean if I thought it happened I would say it. Maybe I passed out and you did stuff to me while I was sleeping.
Monica: All right, check me out.
Ross: (in his head) Oh my God! That's Rachel naked! I can't look at that! I am looking at this. (Looks back at his book.) Okay, vivid colors, expressive brush strokesUnless she wants me to be looking at that. She knows I'm home. She knows I can see her. What kind of game is she playing? I think maybe someone's lonely tonight. Oh-ho, Dr. Geller! Stop it! You're being silly! Or, am I?
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Chandler: And err, he informed me that uh, she took the news rather badly, in fact, he uh, mentioned the word frenzy.
Monica: Me and Chandler?! (Does her fake laugh.)
Ross: So Rachel called. Wants to see me. Going over in a minute.
Joey: What are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
Rachel: (with a hurt expression on her face) Okay, but before you go, could you help me first?
Doug: Excuse me?
Joey: Yeah! Help me get this mini-fridge past the security guard.
RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
Ross: Still I could tell. She was into me. (Joey rolls his eyes.) Well, why dont you set us up?
Dr. Franzblau: No, it's hard enough to get women to go out with me.
Mrs. Geller: Well what is it? Come on sweetie, your like, freaking me out here.
Chandler: All right, then massage me up right nice!
Rachel: Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. (We see Will angrily staring at Rachel.) Oh my God, hes Look at the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something to me, but I cant make it out. (Will mouths, "I hate you.")
Ross: Yknow what? I think I can take care of myself, Ill talk to you later. Good-bye. (Hangs up the phone and turns to find Jill sitting really close to him.) Whoa! Uh, that was your sister actually. She-she thinks that youre just using me.
Joey: All right, then you'd better show me some of that too then.
Joey: Dude, you see right thru me!! (They hug) (Joey heads for the door and pushes Chandler's suitcase on the way out.)
Rachel: All right, then you owe me $350.
Ross: I thought I heard voices! Hi Charlie! (Kisses her.) Hi Joey. (Hugs him.) And.. Oh! You're gonna have to introduce me to your new girlfriend. (Laughs.) I'm just kidding, I know Rachel, I know. (He squeezes her hand.) Come, please come in. Come in.
Monica: Phoebe, you do seem a little tense. Here, let me help you.
David: You're kidding me. Because I'm not seeing anybody, I've just totally made that up.
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know, werent you the guy that told me to quit my job when I had absolutely nothing else to do. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!!
Monica: Oh my God! You don't know me at all!
Rachel: (angrily) GIVE ME THE BOOK! (she takes it and start reading) Pablo Diaz, Brady Smith, huh, "Guy-in-van"?
Phoebe: Umm, thank you for meeting with me.
Frank Sr.: Well, that's why you wanted me to come, right?
Joey: Yeah, I thought so too but, she said the casting people had some problems with me.
Minster: Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
Ross: Well, I mean if uh, if Emily gave me a choice
Kathy: Okay, so let me just get this straight. Youre accusing me of cheating on you, and insulting my performance?
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Rachel: Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
Joey: Actually, you know what? I am. That whole thing with Rachel made me realize that maybe I'm ready for a more serious relationship. You know? Like I'd like to meet a nice mature commitment-minded lady. And looks aren't as important as...Nah, she's gotta be hot.
Ross: Come on. You gotta help me figure out what to do. Okay?
Monica: Hey Chandler, wanna do it with me?
Joey: Hey! (stands up) As soon as it stops raining we have got to go snorkeling! Some kid told me about the sea turtle and, if you blow bubbles in its face, it chases ya! (smiles ecstatic)
Chandler: Your work makes me sad.
Chandler: (to another female nurse) Hey, how 'bout it? You, me, Saturday night?
Joey: Y'know what, hold on, let me go get Chandler. (gets up and leaves.)
Chandler: (pointing out a gift) OK, this one right here is from me.
Rachel: Oh, well, actually we were just talking about me not going to Rosss wedding.
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
Phoebe: Okay, Rachel, get me perfume!
Chandler: Me? No. You?
Bobby: Well its just me and my pal Rooster, the bands name is Numb Nuts.
Ross: Okay, y'know how you told me I should do whatever it takes to fix my marriage?
Chandler: Phoebe, it's me. You can tell me anything.
Chandler: Okay, give me a second! (Pause) Did you clean up in here?
Joey: Well so, how come you blew me off? Y'know? How come you were with him?
Mark: Here, let me. (answers phone) Rachel Green's line, how may I help you?
Jim: So, tell me a little bit about yourself.
Phoebe: Oh please, somebody tell me I dont have to go to work today!
Joey: (shyly) She keeps punching me.
Phoebe: Rach, look! (she holds two buns up to her ears to make her hair look like the Princess Leia 'do.) Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. (Ross stands up horrified) There he is.
Mona: Oh, I gotta get to work. So call me later?
Chandler: Why?! I mean if this guy was me and it was me who had learned that it was me who was the best you'd ever had, I'd be going like this. (He jumps up onto the table and starts doing his happy dance.)
[Scene: A beauty parlour, Rachel is getting a manicure while Chandler, yes Chandler, is getting a petticure (Does that scare you that I know those terms? Well, it scares me.).]
Chandler: By me?
Chandler: Just tell me what I need to do to make things right.
Ross: No, actually I thought about it when, when we were going out. Its how I imagined I uh, I would ask you to marry me.
Ross: Yeah, maybe. I do have my whole career in front of me. I mean, I can still win a Nobel prize. Although the last two papers I've written were widely discredited.
Phoebe: Thanks! Y'know, that when you say things like that it makes me wanna rip that sweater vest right off!
Monica: Alright. Just keep him away from me.
MONICA: MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down.
Ross: Yeah, but you're making me look bad!
Ross: So uh, what did you tell them about me?
Ross: Fine, just stop thinking about me.
Chandler: Will you marry me?
Monica: You still have feelings for me dont you?
Ross: You're right, I'm sorry. Will you marry me?
Rachel: Yeah, seriously coz this is really heavy. (She suddenly lets go) I mean not for me because i'm only pretending to hold this, but for these guys.
Monica: Please... honey, leave the details to me. Now I wanna make this day as special for you as I can. Now, ok, I was thinking that the harpist should wear white.
Monica: Oh, none for me. Thanks.
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
JOEY: So anyway, I'm trying to get my boss's ex-wife to sleep with me. . .
Phoebe: Excuse me, is this your car?
Doug: Good God Bing I well I cant say Im altogether surprised, I saw the way she looked at you, and there was no love there. And the way she looked at me, pure lust.
Ross: What? What? What?! You guys knew? (Joey and Rachel backup against the door.) You all knew and you didn't tell me?!!
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait. Youre telling me this actress person is the only woman you ever wanted who didnt want you back?!
Mark: Okay, okay look, I know I'm being Mr. Inappropriate today, but it's just so tough, I mean see you walking around and I just wanna touch you and hold you, come on no one's around, just, just kiss me.
Ross: Come here to me. No-no, you come here to me.
Ross: Oh, that's me.
Phoebe: All righty. Ill be back in-in a little bit. Unless you wanna come with me?
Ross: What, now youre not even taking to me? (moves over to the coffee table) Look Rachel, I-Im sorry, okay, Im sorry, I was out of my mind. I thought Id lost you, I didnt know what to do. Come on! Come on, how insane must I have been to do something like this? Huh? I-I dont cheat right, I, thats not me, Im not Joey!
Ross: Well, thats what Im here for. (Emma starts crying again) Want me to get that?
Chandler: The weirdest thing happened at the coffee house, I think, I think Phoebe was hitting on me.