words in movies
Phoebe: You guys, why didnt you tell me you were eloping?
Joey: Oh, ah, tour guide at the museum. Yeah, Ross got it for me.
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Phoebe: Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be the surrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just the oven, its totally their bun.
Kathy: Umm, (moves her hands down to his butt) I love this touchy. Can I take it to work with me?
Phoebe Sr: Oh, thats okay, it gave me time to finish glazing my nipples.
Phoebe Sr: Hey! Okay! Well thanks for coming out to see me. I just-I just thought it would be a very good idea to talk about this baby stuff in person. Yknow
Phoebe Sr: I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on you and everything now, but umm, (Sees that Phoebe isnt paying attention and is busy mimicking the puppy.) uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy, its very important.
Phoebe Sr: I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, it would be like a million times harder to give up a child. (Phoebe is playing with the puppy again, and not listening) I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
Tour Guide: Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coats and blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist in the classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, but now (Turns around) Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared my puddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack! (to Joey) See, he pretend he dont even here me!
Ross: But hey, its not just me, I mean the scientists and the tour guides never sit together.
Ross: Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Where you work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the other chefs, right?
Monica: I eat by myself in the alley because everybody hates me.
Chandler: It was fine, yknow? But she didnt agree with me as strongly as she agreed with Joey. She was more like, "I see you point, Im all right with it."
Chandler: Look, you have to help me! Okay? I mean, I know what to do with a woman, yknow, I know where everything goes, its always nice. But I need to know what makes it go from nice to, "My God! Somebodys killing her in there!"
Monica: All right, Im gonna show you something a lot of guys dont know. Rach, give me that pad, please? (She does so and Monica starts drawing on it) All right. Now
Rachel: Let me see that. (Monica shows her) Oh, yeah.
Ross: Thank you, Dr. Phillips, but Im having my lunch at this table, here in the middle. Im having lunch right here, with my good friend Joey, if hell sit with me.
Another Tour Guide: (standing up and removing his coat) Im Ted, and I just moved here a month ago, and New York really scares me.
Frank: Oh, hes so cute, he reminds me of my old dog, Tumour.
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
Ross: Got me.
Ross: (looking) Nono, that would be me again.
Rachel: No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean this up?
Rachel: Wow! I cant believe you lied to me.
Monica: Are you gonna break up with me if I get fat again?
Tag: Rach, Im sorry, but you didnt give me any contracts!
Chandler: Y'know what, it doesnt matter, cause she picked me. Me! From now on I get the dates and you have to stay home on Saturday nights watching Ready, Set, Cook!
Joey: Me too! Theres a game on Tuesday do you wanna go?
Kathy: Ahahaha... haha.. yes I can, of course. Excuse me.
Ross: Please don't take her away from me!
Rachel: Okay. Switch places with me! Switch places with me! Come on! Ill go under, you go over!
Chandler: Believe me, Ive been saying that for years. Oh my God!
Phoebe: Yeah, me too. Not in the shaky angry way you are though.
Chandler: Yeah. Thanks for making me do this.
Rachel: Remind me to introduce you to someone!
Phoebe: Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
Chandler: Thats weird. I dont think my boss likes me either.
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
Phoebe: Yeah! Ooh, you should come with me! Oh yeah, then I'd have someone to sit with!
Joey: You know youve been spitting on me?!
Joey: Shhh! (Pause) Man, you made me lose it! (He goes into the map again.)
Ross: Give me two.
Ross: Okay, wish me luck.
Phoebe: (sees Rachel's face) What? Did you go to a costume party? Let me guess umm Pancho Vila? (Points at Rachel) and you're Bob Saget. (An old lady has sat down at the slot machine Phoebe was just at.)
Phoebe: No-no wait-wait! I cant just let you hang up! Just please talk to me.
DR. BURKE: Yeah, since the divorce, when anybody asks me how I am, it's always with a sympathetic head tilt. [demonstrating] 'How ya doin'? You OK?'
Joey: No, God, no! No! No no, I'm an actor. You'd probably recognize me from a little show called "The Days of Our Lives".
Chandler: Okay, excuse me for a minute. (Starts to leave)
Monica: It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, if I have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's just stupid.
Monica: Oh thats sweet. Dont touch me.
Joey: Thats what you told me.
Emily: Well, you have to understand how humiliating it was for me up on that altar in front of my entire family, all my friends.
Phoebe: Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come crying to me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
Rachel: Handling it? What do you mean, handling it? Theres nothing to handle. Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasnt for me and Joshua. Yknow, theyre not gonna get married anyway!
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Chandler: Freedom! I want my freedom! Why wont you here me?! (Opens the door) Sophie, help me! Help me!! (Sophie stands up)
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Umm, maybe you can start with, "Chandler, even though we were friends; there was a part of me that always knew I wanted more."
Monica: (disgusted) Limited seating! Oh, that is such a lame excuse! Thats not the reason shes not inviting me!
Monica: Well, it was good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
JOEY: Ahh. What the hell are you doing to me man.
Monica: I thought I was making headway, everyone was smiling at me all day, I get off work and I find out that they wrote this (puts on her chef hat) on my chefs hat. (The hat says Quit, bitch)
Joey: (on phone) Well, so anyway Beth, what Im saying is I shouldve considered your feelings before I went home with you that night. Ive ah, Ive recently learned whats it like to be on your side of it, and Im sorry. So, do you think you can forgive me? (listens) Great. Thanks. Okay, bye. (He sits down and crosses out something, and dials the phone again.) Hello, Jennifer? (listens) Oh hi, Mrs. Loreo, is Jennifer there? (listens) Oh, shes not home huh? (listens) Well ah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
Erica: You're kidding me? I mean, it's enough that you are a doctor. But on top of it, you're married to a reverend?
Joey: (cracking up) Nope, you lost me.
Conan: Well be right back with more Friends, less me.
Rachel: Okay, now what was that all about? Is it-does it not taste good? Let me try it.
Courtney: They made me dance, in the fat suit.
Ross: Excuse me, what?
Phoebe: Oh, try and stop me!
Phoebe: (pauses as he figures out how to answer that) Because Im normal! That was the one legacy my grandmother left me, and I know you wanted it as an engagement present.
Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minute there I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!"
Matthew: Let me start that again.
Phoebe: (no accent) I'm trying to get your parents to like me.
Chandler: (putting his hands up) Take whatever you want, just please dont hurt me.
Phoebe: What?! Well he never said that to me!
Phoebe: So instead you told me Monica was pregnant.
Janice: Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
Paul: Yeah Ross its okay, its me, Mr. Stevens.
Monica: And y'know what, I just realised, in the last year Ive only gone out with two guys, Richard and Julio. You gotta help me out here, you gotta set me up, you gotta get me back in the game.
Eric: Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and its not like me to do something so impulsive, but shes just so perfect, and we have so much in common.
Monica: Of course not nothing is. Between me and you
Eric: Eric. (They shake hands and hes squinting. And, no, its not me.)
Phoebe: Oh thatd be me. Sir. (Hands him the cell phone.) After you.
Monica: This switch thing has been driving me crazy. So I turned it off and checked every outlet. Now, four of them dont work. Which means, one of them has to be controlled by the switch. So, I plugged in things in all four of the outlets that-that make noise, so that way, when I turn it on I just follow the noise and find out which one it is.
Phoebe: Believe me Im trying.
Phoebe: And then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go because you don't wanna start the new year with me if you can't finish it. (They kiss) I'm gonna miss you. You scientist guy.
Phoebe: Oh yeah. Thats me.
Monica: Give me one more.
Joey: Why?! Why cant she marry me?!
Rachel: (Emma starts crying in the other room) Oh sorry, hold on. Let me just check on the baby!
Phoebe: No I'm not. No! If anything I'm making you look better! They'll see you talking to me and that's--I'm a hit!
Chandler: (to another couple) Uh, excuse me? Could you take a picture of us?
Monica: Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! (Points to her cheek.)
Ross: Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didnt say anything to Rachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.
Monica: See? Thats what I mean. I mean that, thats great! But I wouldnt trade in what I have for that. I mean Im gonna be with Chandler for the rest of my life, and thats what makes me happy. (Chandler approaches.) Hey sweetie, come here! Come sit down. Hey Phoebe and I were just talking about how our relationship is deep and meaningful. It really is dont you think?
Joey: Pheebs, give me the ring back!
Phoebe: What?! No, you cant, you cant leave me here with them! Were baby-sitting!
Rachel: No! Its just that, Kate bothered me.
Phoebe: Me too! (Joins the hug.)
Joey: (whispering to Chandler) Youll tell me later?
Joey: Yeah that didnt sound like me.
Joey: I still cant believe they took away my key. You trust me with yours.
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Monica: Did you just hung up on me? (she hangs up too) All right, look, I need you at the rehearsal dinner tonight at 1800 hours.
Chandler: Oh youve got to be kidding me.
Ross: Come on, you-you cant tell me you actually believe that-that theres a woman inside that cat!
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Rachel: Excuse me?
Ross: I'm sorry, Chandler but this, this is really important to me.
Phoebe: Yeah... Oh Bitsy, hi. Uhm... listen I just wanted to thank you again for having me here tonight.
Phoebe: You have got to be kidding me!
JOEY: No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this. He is so much cooler than our dads. [Chandler starts kicking him below the table] I mean, you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin me for? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
Rachel: That-that you came on to me?
Ross: (forcing the door open) Come on, Rachel, come on! Talk to me! Please!!
Rachel: You know you kissed me first.
Rachel: Im sorry, they were just all coming at me, and I didnt know what to do.
[Flashback to: A street, Ross is sitting in his newly purchased MGB. Which is one of the better British sports cars ever made. Of course, better is a relative term. Which reminds me of a joke. Why dont the British make computers? Because they couldnt figure out how to make them leak oil. Anyway, the gang is all staring at his new purchase.]
Ross: (entering) Rachel wont talk to me! She wont even open the door!