words in movies
Written by: Jeffrey Astrof and Mike Sikowitz. .
Ross: Mike "Gandolf" Ganderson, only like the funest guy in the world.
Mike: I get the joke. Sophisticated as it was. Now the thing I wanna say is... maybe we should have talked about this before. Us living together, you're not expecting a proposal, right?
Mike: Yeah, you do that, and I go check my dad for signs of internal bleeding. (Mike walks away and Bitsy walks in the same direction.)
Mike: So...? What do you think? (looks at his parents, which look in disgust)
Helena: Im sorry? (Holds out the mike.)
(They start to leave Central Perk. The band starts to play "Here, There and Everywhere" by the Beatles. The crowd rises from their seats. Phoebe and Chandler walk down the aisle. Phoebe really glows with happiness. So does Mike who watches her walk down the isle. When Phoebe and Chandler arrive, they kiss and Phoebe walks to her bridesmaids.)
Mike: No, my parents are rich.
Mike: Wow! You look like... like my mom.
Mike: And that's how it's done! (Phoebe kisses him)
Mike: Mom, dad, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, these are my parents: Theodore and Bitsy.
Mike: My friend Manny. I asked him to keep me away from you.
[Cut to Central Perk, Phoebe at the mike.]
Mike: Hey... Wh... What are you doing?
Phoebe: Oh please, these guys, we haven't even moved in yet and they have us picking out china patterns. (Mike seems to gag a little...and laughs nervously. They begin to leave. Phoebe bolts back)
Mike: No, no, no, you're doing fine, really... Why don't you go talk to my dad?
Mike: Yeah, I'm sure they will, but you don't have to do this... I'm wanting them to get to know Phoebe, not (accent) Phoebe...
Mike: Well, come on...
Mike: Uhm... Did you just hit my dad?
(There's booing around them, and Mike sinks in his chair, holding his hand in above his eyes, hoping no-one would recognize him)
Mike: But, I mean, you have met... humans before, right? Look, why don't you go talk to my mom?
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Mike: Awesome!
Mike: Look Phoebe, It's not about you. I just never wanna get married again.
[Scene: Mike's parents house. Dining room again. Both Mike and Phoebe are not at the table, but the others still are.]
Mike: A little better.
Mike: I'm not interested.
Mike: So what? I mean if even I can get past that, it shouldn't bother you. And you don't have to like her. You just have to accept the fact that I do. I mean, if you even can't be civil to the woman I love...
Mike: Wanna get out of here?
Mike: You do?
Mike: Oh, I made a little something. If I had more time to work on it, it'd be better, but..
Phoebe: So Theodore... I uhm... I can see where Mike gets his good looks from...
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. There's no-one else in the world I would ask to marry me... three times. But I wanna take care of you, have babies with you, and grow old with you... Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Rachel: Shake it! (Phoebe, Mike, Chandler, Monica and Joey step in)
Mike: No, no Mike, just Crap Bag. First name Crap, last name Bag.
Mike: And there is Kevin.
Joey: Mike.
Mike: No, no! What I mean is, I hate going back to my apartment now... and partly because I live above a known crack den but... mostly because when I'm there, It's just, I really miss you. So.. do you want to move in together?
Mike: No! It's my fault. I keep trying to propose in these stupid ways and all I wanna do is tell you that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Mike: All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time, but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
Phoebe: Mike? Okay! What's his last name?
Joey: MIKE!!!
Mike: Yeah?
Mike: I am Mike.
Mike: It was nice meeting you!
Joey: Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to Mike.
Mike: Well, I'm a lawyer.
Mike: Actually, I just gave up my practice.
Mike: No, I didn't.
Mike: What?!
Mike: (Joey holds up six fingers) Six!
Mike: Really?
(Phoebe and Mike look at him, and he goes over to the counter.)
Mike: There isn't a piano here.
Mike: Do you think that maybe, sometime, I could...
Mike: That's great. What kind of music do you play?
Mike: Phoebe (comes in smiling then sees Phoebe crying) what's wrong?
Mike: but you did say it
Mike: Hey, so are you sure your ready to go.
[Scene: Ross goes to see Mike to explain about Phoebe.]
Mike: what's up is Phoebe ok?
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Mike: that's why she was weird.
(Monica opens the door and Mike is standing at the doorway)
Mike: I just think there's somebody better out there for you, (pause) I mean I'm not saying me but. maybe me.
Mike: what's wrong?
Mike: But Rachel I thought she just had a baby with Ross
Ross: So, so, is Mike coming to dinner?
Ross: (He knocks at the door, Mike opens it) Hey Mike sorry to just drop by like this, can I come in?
Mike: Oh.
[Scene: Phoebe is sitting with Mike, explaining about Vicrum.]
Mike: Definitely
Mike: uh huh
Mike: Vicrum?
Phoebe: (returns) Okay, that was Mike.
Mike: its Mike Hanagen
Mike: Okay. Do you think maybe sometime I could take you out?
Phoebe: Yeah, I kinda do. (Mike lets go of her hand) Well, how's this? (she takes Mike's hand and puts it on her breast, she tears open the sugar and puts it in her coffee. Mike thinks it over and nods appreciative. After that, they hold hands again. Joey now enters, and sees the two sitting on the couch, holding hands.)
Mike: This is nice.
Mike: Is this cool, huh?
Mike: Is it?
Mike: You need both hands for that?
Mike: It's to my apartment.
Mike: So... how many guys have your key?
Phoebe: (impatient) I know Mike, why don't you keep digging?
Phoebe: I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. David is still there. Mike closes the door.]
Mike: Did you uhm...
Mike: Don't point your finger at me.
Mike: ...kiss him?
Ross: well then I didn't need to bother you or the four other Mike Hanagens I bothered.
Mike: Well, I might.
Mike: It's never gonna happen again right?
Mike: Hey, what are you kidding me?
(Phoebe and Mike enter.)
Phoebe: I'm sooo sorry!! I just... I keep thinking about Mike! I'm crazy about David, and we're having so much fun together. Why-Why do I miss Mike? That's-that's gonna go away, right?
ROSS: Oh, it's fine.� Actually, I, I invited Mike over.
MIKE: Okay.� (pause)
MIKE: Yeah.
MIKE: Bye.
RACHEL: Phoebe's Mike?