words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to pry more information about Chandler and Monica from Joey who's sitting on the couch and busy downing a pizza.]
Joey: Rach, I told you everything I knew last night! Look, it's not that big of a deal, so Monica and Chandler are doing it.
Joey: Sorry. Monica and Chandler are making love.
[Scene: Chandler's office, Monica and him are at a party his office is throwing.]
Monica: Look at us all dressed up for the big office party! By the way, what are we celebrating?
Monica: I think this is so cool because none of our friends are here and we can be a real couple. We don't have to hide.
Monica: Ooh, and I can do this. (She kisses him on the cheek.)
Doug: Hey Bing! (Slaps him on his ass.) (Sees Monica) Wo-ho-ho, who's the pretty lady and what the hell is she doing with you?
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Monica: Hi, nice to meet you!
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Doug: Come on honey, let's go drink our body weight. (They walk off leaving Chandler and Monica alone.)
Monica: What was that?
Monica: That noise you just made?
Monica: Really? Your work laugh?
Monica: All right, check me out.
(Monica does a fake laugh. For the laughs, you'll have to see the episode. I can't describe them.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is buying a muffin as Chandler runs in.]
Monica: Really?
Monica: Hey, I thought you already had one.
Rachel: (To Monica) Hey!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: What are you doing here? I thought you had to do inventory all day.
Rachel: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new with you?
Monica: Uhh, not much. Uh, work's good.
Monica: Okay. Umm
Monica: Okay, what's going on with you?
Monica: Well, I-Ithere was this guy at the bank that I thought was cute umm, but I don't anymore.
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
[Scene: A tennis court somewhere in the city of New York, it's the doubles match-up of a century Chandler and Monica versus Doug and Kara.]
(Hits the ball towards Chandler who returns it back to him. He then hits the ball at Monica who slams it and it bounces off Kara's leg.)
Monica: Game!
Monica: Am I on fire today or what?! Those birds are browned, basted, and ready to be carved!
Monica: I'm sorry, I don't understand what you just said.
Monica: Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she's popping pills.
Monica: They have racquets don't they?!
Chandler: Oh yes, sir! Put me out of my misery. Are you sure you never played pro? (Does his work laugh.) (To Monica) Please let them win!
Monica: I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
(Chandler glares at her and she shrugs her shoulders. Monica serves again; and Kara returns it.)
Monica: I got it!!
Chandler: Long! (Gives Monica the Work Laugh.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Chandler are returning from the game.]
Monica: I can't believe you let them win!
Monica: I was frustrated.
Monica: I was frustrated with you!
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Monica: I'm telling you, something's wrong! My brother does not stay out all night.
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is going through her purse as Rachel rushes in.]
Monica: My turn? What-what are you talking about?
Rachel: Ugh, Monica, I know about you and Chandler.
Monica: What?!
Monica: Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let me know how that one turns out.
Monica: Well, if you had kept listening, you-you would have heard me call him Mr. Big (Thinks) ot.
Monica: Mr. Bigot. He tells the most racist jokes.
Monica: Me and Chandler?! (Does her fake laugh.)
[Scene: Doug's house, Chandler, Monica, and them are just finishing dinner.]
Monica: Oh, none for me. Thanks.
Doug: Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughta sweeten it up, huh? (Once again, with the laugh.)
Monica: (To Chandler) How does that laugh not give you a headache?
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Monica: I'd rather hang out with a sniveling work weasel guy when I can be hanging out with my boyfriend who I actually respect.
Monica: (interrupting) Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Chandler: I think I do! (They all laugh.) Thank you, Monica.
Monica: I thought you could use the help.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is going through the mail as Joey enters.]
Joey: Oh well, Chandler and Monica are over there and it's kinda hard to concentrate.
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Rachel enters and sneaks up to Chandler's bedroom where she overhears Chandler and Monica talking.]
Monica: Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hate having to lie to Rachel!
Monica: I know! It's just that ever since high school Rachel was the one person I told everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.
Monica: (entering) Joey?! Oh my God, Rachel!
Monica: Wh-wh-what are you doing here? (She tries to pull her shirt down to cover the fact that she's wearing men's boxers.]
Monica: Okay great!
Monica: Great! Umm, well what-what I was doing in Chandler's room is that umm, I was cleaning it! In fact, he pays me to clean it!
Monica: Y'know when I said to you earlier that I was at work umm, I'm at my new work.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: I'll get back to my new job.
Rachel: 'Kay. (Pause.) Congratulations on your new job. (She goes and hugs Monica and is almost in tears.)
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Chandler: I suppose that Monica will have the � manipulative shrew.
Monica: Hi. It is so, so nice to meet you.
Monica: I don't know about that.
Monica: (Gets up) Okay, okay. You two (to Phoebe and Rachel) go get the dessert. And I'll let you in.
Phoebe: (while Monica drags her in the restaurant) Get your garlic-peelers off me!
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are sharing a bowl of popcorn, while Monica carefully reads the instruction manual for her television set.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the kitchen, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are sitting around the table writing one notepads while Chandler is looking over their shoulders.]
Monica: (naughty in doorway) Welcome home. I�ve missed you. join me in the bedroom?
Monica: Thank you. (To Chandler.) I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
Monica: Uh, good hands. (she holds Chandler hands) Healing hands.
Monica: We don’t?
Monica: (thinks about it) All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire he is out of there!
Chandler: We're not gonna have this conversation again... Look at this place. Why am I so intimidated by this guy? Pretentious art, this huge macho couch. When we know all he does is sit around all day crying about losing Monica to a real man! (laughs) You don't think he's here, do you? (Joey looks around)
Monica: C'mon Chandler, I think we have been given an opportunity. I mean, the mistake has already been made. They are writing up the paper right now.
Monica: Why not?
Chandler: Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
Monica: God works in mysterious ways.
Monica: But she liked us.
Chandler: She likes Doctor Chandler and Reverend Monica.
Monica: (Almost crying) Please.. please, we are so close.
Monica: It's too late for apologies.
Monica: (sniffing) Maybe she will. Uh! Why couldn't I have been a Reverend?
Monica: (She gives Joey a you-are-so-stupid-look) Ok, ten.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning. Chandler is sitting and staring at his phone. Monica enters and creeps up next to Chandler.]
Phoebe: Just pretend they're not even here! It's OK Monica, when that spotlight hits you it so bright you won't see anyoneanyway.
Janice: Well, let's go to a bad one and make out. (they start to kiss and lean back into Monica.)
[Scene: Bill and Colleen's apartment. Chandler and Monica enter.]
MONICA: Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.
Monica: I can't believe it! (pause) I lost!
Monica: (pointing to a picture on the table) I-Is... Is that a picture?
Monica: Look, doctor!
Monica: Yeah, but the important thing to know about us, is how much we would care for this little baby. (holds up the sonogram)
Chandler: Well, our names really are Monica and Chandler. We're from New York.
Monica: But we were hoping that since we told you the truth that you still might consider...
Joey: No-no! No! I mean it's gonna be all smelling like Monica!
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Monica: God bless you Chandler Bing!
Monica: I would get a room with this cake. I think I could show this cake a good time!
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry honey, you know, but when she said "sex" I wasn't thinking about "sex with you"!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around the kitchen table as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica sits on the couch and Phoebe is pacing up and down the room.]
[Scene: A Street, Chandler and Monica are walking down the sidewalk after his office holiday party.]
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Chandler enters the door.]
Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minute there I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!"
Monica: Nancy doesn’t smoke!
Monica: So? What do you think of the house?
Monica: So? Do you think we should get it?
Monica: Hey! You smell like perfume and cigarettes.
Monica: Don’t you love the huge yard?
Monica: Wait a minute, you stayed home all day and played Ms. Pac-Man while I went off to work like some kind of chump?!
Monica: I think we should.
Monica: Okay. Right. Oh my God that is gonna be so hard.
Monica: This is huge!
Monica: How bad you wanna smoke, right now.
Monica: No, he’s picking up dinner, why, what’s up?
Monica: What?
Monica (puzzled): All right...
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?
Monica: Phoebe, relax none of that stuff ever happens! They just put it on there for legal reasons!
(Joey walks in and sees Monica. He freaks out and runs back into the hallway, screaming.)
Monica: (turns to them) Ok, alright, you guys, you'd better sit down, this is pretty big.
Monica: We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there. (Points to Rachel and Phoebe) It is beautiful, isn't it?
Monica: And about an hour ago, we made an offer.
Joey: All right. Okay. You and Monica, friends for a long time, and sure there are rules, but then you went to London. Oh, no, but thats different. I mean, there are rules there, too! You know what I mean?
Monica: I know! Hey, you havent been practising the routine, have you?
Monica: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...
Rachel: Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
Chandler: Okay before we start the celebration, Monica has to go put on her party dress.
Monica: Every year.
Monica: Technicality!
Monica: Deal!
Monica: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Monica: Maurice.
Monica: That’s not even a word!
Phoebe: And how none of it matters when the people really love each other. (Chandler and Monica kiss.) And how people will believe anything you tell them as long as its a compliment.
Monica: (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Chandler: Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
Monica and Rachel: What?!
Monica: When I take a shower, she leaves me little notes on the mirror.
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: She really left.
Monica: And?
Monica: Well, there you go.
(Chandler and Monica hug)
Monica: We can't afford that.
Monica: What?
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Yeah, we'll be okay.
Ross: Love you guys. (he kisses Monica, he, Rachel and Phoebe leave.)
Phoebe: (to Monica) You're gonna be okay?
Monica: We sure are.
Monica: And a baby...
Monica: Hey, see that snippy guy over there? Hes the one who decides who gets up on the platform. We should go dance by him.
Monica: Oh my God! My God! We've got the house !?
Monica: Rachel, this is yours.
Monica: I know.
Monica: All right, everybody open them!
Monica: Enjoy!
Monica: Hey, let me tell them!
Monica: Oh, that was our favourite game show ever!