words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to pry more information about Chandler and Monica from Joey who's sitting on the couch and busy downing a pizza.]
Joey: Rach, I told you everything I knew last night! Look, it's not that big of a deal, so Monica and Chandler are doing it.
Joey: Sorry. Monica and Chandler are making love.
[Scene: Chandler's office, Monica and him are at a party his office is throwing.]
Monica: Look at us all dressed up for the big office party! By the way, what are we celebrating?
Monica: I think this is so cool because none of our friends are here and we can be a real couple. We don't have to hide.
Monica: Ooh, and I can do this. (She kisses him on the cheek.)
Doug: Hey Bing! (Slaps him on his ass.) (Sees Monica) Wo-ho-ho, who's the pretty lady and what the hell is she doing with you?
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Monica: Hi, nice to meet you!
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Doug: Come on honey, let's go drink our body weight. (They walk off leaving Chandler and Monica alone.)
Monica: What was that?
Monica: That noise you just made?
Monica: Really? Your work laugh?
Monica: All right, check me out.
(Monica does a fake laugh. For the laughs, you'll have to see the episode. I can't describe them.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is buying a muffin as Chandler runs in.]
Monica: Really?
Monica: Hey, I thought you already had one.
Rachel: (To Monica) Hey!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: What are you doing here? I thought you had to do inventory all day.
Rachel: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new with you?
Monica: Uhh, not much. Uh, work's good.
Monica: Okay. Umm
Monica: Okay, what's going on with you?
Monica: Well, I-Ithere was this guy at the bank that I thought was cute umm, but I don't anymore.
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
[Scene: A tennis court somewhere in the city of New York, it's the doubles match-up of a century Chandler and Monica versus Doug and Kara.]
(Hits the ball towards Chandler who returns it back to him. He then hits the ball at Monica who slams it and it bounces off Kara's leg.)
Monica: Game!
Monica: Am I on fire today or what?! Those birds are browned, basted, and ready to be carved!
Monica: I'm sorry, I don't understand what you just said.
Monica: Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she's popping pills.
Monica: They have racquets don't they?!
Chandler: Oh yes, sir! Put me out of my misery. Are you sure you never played pro? (Does his work laugh.) (To Monica) Please let them win!
Monica: I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
(Chandler glares at her and she shrugs her shoulders. Monica serves again; and Kara returns it.)
Monica: I got it!!
Chandler: Long! (Gives Monica the Work Laugh.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Chandler are returning from the game.]
Monica: I can't believe you let them win!
Monica: I was frustrated.
Monica: I was frustrated with you!
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Monica: I'm telling you, something's wrong! My brother does not stay out all night.
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is going through her purse as Rachel rushes in.]
Monica: My turn? What-what are you talking about?
Rachel: Ugh, Monica, I know about you and Chandler.
Monica: What?!
Monica: Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let me know how that one turns out.
Monica: Well, if you had kept listening, you-you would have heard me call him Mr. Big (Thinks) ot.
Monica: Mr. Bigot. He tells the most racist jokes.
Monica: Me and Chandler?! (Does her fake laugh.)
[Scene: Doug's house, Chandler, Monica, and them are just finishing dinner.]
Monica: Oh, none for me. Thanks.
Doug: Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughta sweeten it up, huh? (Once again, with the laugh.)
Monica: (To Chandler) How does that laugh not give you a headache?
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Monica: I'd rather hang out with a sniveling work weasel guy when I can be hanging out with my boyfriend who I actually respect.
Monica: (interrupting) Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Chandler: I think I do! (They all laugh.) Thank you, Monica.
Monica: I thought you could use the help.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is going through the mail as Joey enters.]
Joey: Oh well, Chandler and Monica are over there and it's kinda hard to concentrate.
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Rachel enters and sneaks up to Chandler's bedroom where she overhears Chandler and Monica talking.]
Monica: Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hate having to lie to Rachel!
Monica: I know! It's just that ever since high school Rachel was the one person I told everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.
Monica: (entering) Joey?! Oh my God, Rachel!
Monica: Wh-wh-what are you doing here? (She tries to pull her shirt down to cover the fact that she's wearing men's boxers.]
Monica: Okay great!
Monica: Great! Umm, well what-what I was doing in Chandler's room is that umm, I was cleaning it! In fact, he pays me to clean it!
Monica: Y'know when I said to you earlier that I was at work umm, I'm at my new work.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: I'll get back to my new job.
Rachel: 'Kay. (Pause.) Congratulations on your new job. (She goes and hugs Monica and is almost in tears.)
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Monica: Oh my God! Ohh! Look at this one! Its so beautiful!
Monica: Hey you guys?
Monica: You have to!
Monica: So Ross, are you gonna bring Mona?
Monica: Oh.
[Scene: Joey and Janines apartment, Joey and Monica are arranging flowers. Chandler walks in.]
Monica: All right, so now that Ross knows can you tell us yknow how it happened? I mean, when did it happen? How many times did it happen?
(Monica and Chandler look shocked as Ross goes to leave.)
Monica: So we do Supergirl.
Rachel: (To Monica) Oh, you did this to him?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, Monica, and now Chandler are still playing catch. The guys are exhausted and sitting around the room. Monica is still standing all pumped up and being hyper-competitive yet again. {Okay! We get it! She's competitive!! Must we see all the time?!}]
Monica: You didnt dress up either?!
Monica: All right baby, come on! (Rolls the dice) Yes! Yes! I am on fire!
Monica: No!! You have been screwing us all day!
Monica: No, space doody!
Monica: What are you supposed to be?
Monica: What?! Theres only been like four kids.
Chandler: Monicas gotta have the phone in the right place and(Frantic babbling.)
Monica: Hey Joey?
Monica: Yeah
Monica: What?! Really?!
Monica: What?! Come on I am tough! Punch me right here! (Her stomach) As hard as you can!
[Time lapse, Monica is going over to talk to Joey.]
Monica: Oh my God, Phoebe!
Monica: You read comic books right?
[Cut to Joey and Monica.]
Monica: Yeah.
Joey: Monica and I were talking about who could kick whose ass in a fight, you or Ross?
Chandler: (To Monica) You picked Ross?!
(Monica turns around slowly.)
Joey: (To Monica) Hey-hey-hey, I think we might find out the answer to our question.
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Monica: What? I-I bought groceries, I was gonna make you dinner!
MONICA: What if my own baby hates me? Huh? What am I gonna do then?
Monica: (bursting in) I knew it!! Yknow, youre not so quiet yourself, missy!
Monica: Fine! If you want me to wear the boots, Ill wear the boots. In fact, Ill go into my room right now and yknow try the outfit on.
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh God!
Monica: Alright, Cincinnati, no blinds, everybody ante. (deals cards)
Monica: Ohh, sweetie! (Goes to comfort her.) Hey, I bet you anything that hes gonna call you again.
[Cut to later in that episode. Rachel and Phoebe are going to a movie from Monica and Chandlers, and as Phoebe walks by Chandler she pinches him on the butt and exits.]
Monica: Look, I wanted to tell Im-Im sorry you lost.
Monica: (laughs) Is that a secret or a lie.
Monica: Chandler please!
Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh my God! You cleaned! (Gasps) Look at these floors! You did the windows! Oh, I have been begging you for months and you did! You cleaned! And nagging works!
(Monica notices something.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The girls are talking with the firemen.]
Monica: Well then who?
Monica: Did she really say that?
Monica: Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?
Monica: Ugh, I can not believe this! I mean, who is she to judge us? We could not have been nicer to her!
Monica: Well, usually when Im this anxious, I clean!
Monica: (To Chandler) Did you hear that?! They bumped them up to first class because they are on their honeymoon! Come on! Lets act like were on our honeymoon.
Chandler: (To Monica) Oh, well thank you in advance. (Kisses her.)
Monica: (To Chandler) I love her.
Chandler: (To Monica) Yknow, we havent found anybody else.
Monica: Dont you see? Its the perfect crime!
Monica: Yeah! (Laughs.)
Monica: I guess.
Joey: (To Chandler) You?! (To Monica) And-and you?!
Monica: Nice jeans!
Monica: Oh, I fell asleep.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Hello.
[Cut to later in that episode. Chandler is in his bathroom with Monica, and hes panicking on how far Phoebe is pushing him.]
Monica: I was the pile of coats!
Monica: Theyre my pants!
Monica: All right. (Looking through a box.) Op, here it is! Right underneath the can of-of bug bomb. I wonder if the best place to put something that cooks food is underneath the can of poison?
Monica: I would do it but she thinks Im attracted to her!
Monica: (Looking nauseous from her parents kissing.) And Im going to go get drunk. (Gets up to get a drink.)
Monica: No! I was just getting into position and then everything went dark.
Monica: Because I put my head between her legs.
Monica: Oh, I love this street. The trees, the big front yards, the actual picket fences.
Monica: (To Chandler) This is what happens when you dont register for gifts!
Monica: I know youre planning my surprise bridal shower.
Monica: Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!
Monica: No I didnt!
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica is sitting on the step as Rachel returns.]
Monica: Sounds about right.
[Ross and Judy enter the living room. Judy and Ross sit down on the couch beside Jack. Monica and Chandler are sitting on the coffee table.]
Phoebe: Thanks. Hi, um, 'kay. I'd like to start with a song that's about a man that I recently met, who's, um, come to be very important to me. (Monica gives her a look) 'Kay. (Sung:)
Monica: Oh. (turns and looks at Joey, who gives a way-to-go thumbs up and smile.)
Monica: Oh my God! Joey, what did you do after you threw her leg on the fire?
Monica: Im sorry, they surprised me. There was nothing I could do!
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
(Monica gets down on one knee.)
[This starts a series of flashbacks beginning with Monica and Chandler in the waiting room in The One With the Birth.]
Monica: I think so. Se, he-he's not inviting you to his party because he likes you.
Monica: Oh, about five minutes. Right now theyre interviewing his opponent. Apparently he trains by going to Iran and pulling the arms off thieves.
Monica: Please! I feel so bad! Just watch the hot woman get naked!
Monica: Thank you. All right, now who else do you want to invite?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are now sitting in the living room.]
Monica: Thats right. Get it out of your system while were alone.
Rachel: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
Monica: Wow! Wow! And its definitely all gone? Theres nothing there to work with? (Joey glares at her.) What were you thinking?
Monica: A little tight? I could see double-oh and seven in those pants.
Ross: Oh really? Well I-I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
[Scene 13: Central Perk, the gang is gathered around Monica comforting her brother, who in a slight state of shock is cuddling a cushion for security.]
Monica: Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girls number.
(Monica runs out.)