words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to pry more information about Chandler and Monica from Joey who's sitting on the couch and busy downing a pizza.]
Joey: Rach, I told you everything I knew last night! Look, it's not that big of a deal, so Monica and Chandler are doing it.
Joey: Sorry. Monica and Chandler are making love.
[Scene: Chandler's office, Monica and him are at a party his office is throwing.]
Monica: Look at us all dressed up for the big office party! By the way, what are we celebrating?
Monica: I think this is so cool because none of our friends are here and we can be a real couple. We don't have to hide.
Monica: Ooh, and I can do this. (She kisses him on the cheek.)
Doug: Hey Bing! (Slaps him on his ass.) (Sees Monica) Wo-ho-ho, who's the pretty lady and what the hell is she doing with you?
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Monica: Hi, nice to meet you!
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Doug: Come on honey, let's go drink our body weight. (They walk off leaving Chandler and Monica alone.)
Monica: What was that?
Monica: That noise you just made?
Monica: Really? Your work laugh?
Monica: All right, check me out.
(Monica does a fake laugh. For the laughs, you'll have to see the episode. I can't describe them.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is buying a muffin as Chandler runs in.]
Monica: Really?
Monica: Hey, I thought you already had one.
Rachel: (To Monica) Hey!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: What are you doing here? I thought you had to do inventory all day.
Rachel: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new with you?
Monica: Uhh, not much. Uh, work's good.
Monica: Okay. Umm
Monica: Okay, what's going on with you?
Monica: Well, I-Ithere was this guy at the bank that I thought was cute umm, but I don't anymore.
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
[Scene: A tennis court somewhere in the city of New York, it's the doubles match-up of a century Chandler and Monica versus Doug and Kara.]
(Hits the ball towards Chandler who returns it back to him. He then hits the ball at Monica who slams it and it bounces off Kara's leg.)
Monica: Game!
Monica: Am I on fire today or what?! Those birds are browned, basted, and ready to be carved!
Monica: I'm sorry, I don't understand what you just said.
Monica: Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she's popping pills.
Monica: They have racquets don't they?!
Chandler: Oh yes, sir! Put me out of my misery. Are you sure you never played pro? (Does his work laugh.) (To Monica) Please let them win!
Monica: I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
(Chandler glares at her and she shrugs her shoulders. Monica serves again; and Kara returns it.)
Monica: I got it!!
Chandler: Long! (Gives Monica the Work Laugh.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Chandler are returning from the game.]
Monica: I can't believe you let them win!
Monica: I was frustrated.
Monica: I was frustrated with you!
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Monica: I'm telling you, something's wrong! My brother does not stay out all night.
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is going through her purse as Rachel rushes in.]
Monica: My turn? What-what are you talking about?
Rachel: Ugh, Monica, I know about you and Chandler.
Monica: What?!
Monica: Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let me know how that one turns out.
Monica: Well, if you had kept listening, you-you would have heard me call him Mr. Big (Thinks) ot.
Monica: Mr. Bigot. He tells the most racist jokes.
Monica: Me and Chandler?! (Does her fake laugh.)
[Scene: Doug's house, Chandler, Monica, and them are just finishing dinner.]
Monica: Oh, none for me. Thanks.
Doug: Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughta sweeten it up, huh? (Once again, with the laugh.)
Monica: (To Chandler) How does that laugh not give you a headache?
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Monica: I'd rather hang out with a sniveling work weasel guy when I can be hanging out with my boyfriend who I actually respect.
Monica: (interrupting) Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Chandler: I think I do! (They all laugh.) Thank you, Monica.
Monica: I thought you could use the help.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is going through the mail as Joey enters.]
Joey: Oh well, Chandler and Monica are over there and it's kinda hard to concentrate.
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Rachel enters and sneaks up to Chandler's bedroom where she overhears Chandler and Monica talking.]
Monica: Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hate having to lie to Rachel!
Monica: I know! It's just that ever since high school Rachel was the one person I told everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.
Monica: (entering) Joey?! Oh my God, Rachel!
Monica: Wh-wh-what are you doing here? (She tries to pull her shirt down to cover the fact that she's wearing men's boxers.]
Monica: Okay great!
Monica: Great! Umm, well what-what I was doing in Chandler's room is that umm, I was cleaning it! In fact, he pays me to clean it!
Monica: Y'know when I said to you earlier that I was at work umm, I'm at my new work.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: I'll get back to my new job.
Rachel: 'Kay. (Pause.) Congratulations on your new job. (She goes and hugs Monica and is almost in tears.)
(Monica motions that it went right over Rachel's head.)
Monica: Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
Monica: Who is it?
Monica: What about the closeness?
Monica: Hey Rach, arent these candlesticks (holds up a pair) mine?
Monica: The players.
Monica: Ohh! Yeah, I forgot.
Monica: Let me try. (Gets up to join them.)
Monica: (joining him) Wow! She is pretty, huh?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, it's Rachel birthday party and Chandler is about to spill the beans.]
Monica: And its a magnet!
Monica: What happened?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is getting ready for a fishing trip and Phoebe is asking him about the fishing lures. Ross is playing with the rod, and Monica is pretty much just watching the on goings.]
Monica: Oh my God! You don't know me at all!
Monica: What?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, later that day, Gary is kissing Phoebe good-bye.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next day, Chandler and Joey are there as Rachel returns from her interview.]
Monica: Man, I would be great in a war! I mean, I really, I think I would make a fantastic military leader. I mean I know I would make General way before any of you guys.
Monica: Okay its time for the toast! Umm now-now, I know that Ross usually gives the toast, but this year Im going to do it.
Monica: Yes!
Monica: A kiss? What are you talking about?
Monica: Oh, I know! Umm, is it because he's always correcting people's grammar? Whom! Whom! Sometimes it's who!
Monica: You become friends after?
Monica: Wow! Uh what, did he uh, say?
Monica: No! (Pause) But, theyre callin out to me! I mean this little guy (Holds up a small one) even crawled up into my lap. Oh come on, Chandler wouldnt mind if I opened just one present! What do you think it is?
Monica: What's a 'niffle'?
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Phoebe, do you want to go see a movie after dinner tonight?
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, ??????? is playing, as Chandler peaks his head out of the storage closet and sneaks back to his seat and pretends he's reading something. Then a short while later Monica pokes her head out of the closet and sneaks back to her seat and sits down, pretending as if nothing has happened.]
Monica: So! So we've got to go upstairs and have a lot of sex to prove them wrong!
Monica: Oh!! (hits Chandler and Joey in the head) You guys knew about this and you didnt tell us?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is tying a ribbon to a vase.]
Monica: Yes. Yes, I was. A guy. From work. (Thinks) I'm seeing a guy from work! Ha!
Monica: I dont believe you spent my wedding fund on the beach house!
Monica: No, you're the best.
Monica: I am the best.
Monica: Why?
Ross: Catch any big fish? (Phoebe, Ross, and Monica all go over to him.)
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Mr. Geller and Ross are finishing up recreating Monicas memories as Monica enters.]
Monica: They really were pretty, werent they? (Rachel and Phoebe both agree)
Big Nosed Rachel: Okay, Monica, can you just call it sex?! It really creeps me out when you call it that! Okay, and by the way, while we're at it, a guy's thing is not called his tenderness. Believe me! (Walks into the living room and greets Monica's parents.) Hi!
Rachel: Awful, absolutely awful. (Plus other negative comments from Phoebe and Monica.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, Phoebe is already there waiting for the delievery guy.]
Monica: You didn't!
Monica: Hi Chandler.
Monica: I'm crying here!!
Monica: The park huh? A public place.
Monica: Yes it is. You see I've always found the men's bathroom very sexual. Haven't you?
Monica: I feel really sad that we're not really there anymore.
Monica: Did not.
Monica: Really?
Monica: Yeah. (They hug.)
Janice: Oh, we go way back. Before Monica made an honest man out of him, Chandler used to be my little love muffin! (does her irritating laugh). So? Are you guys thinking of getting this house too? Ooh! Are we gonna have a bidding war? I'd better warn you, I'm a toughie (playfully punches Chandler, who tries to get away from her)
Monica: How do you think I am?! Youve wrecked all my childhood memories. You love Ross more than me. And I just rubbed a dead mouse on my face!
MONICA: Yes but my mom got me this job.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is eating breakfast, Ross is heading for the bathroom.]
Chandler: What a great apology! (To Monica) And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there. Monica is holding a piece of paper.]
Monica: I would love to do it together!
[Monica answers the door. Its Fun Bobby.]
Monica: You al-you already had it?
Monica: Who? Two divorces and Joey?!
Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is still working on the seating chart as Joey enters.]
Monica: That doesn't seem fair.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: I need more swordfish. (to one of the assistant chefs) Can you get me some more swordfish?
Monica: All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys.
Chandler: Where's Monica?! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Is she here?
Monica: Oh, we're not doing that. Okay
Monica: And ice!
Monica: (Thinks) Cups.
Fat Monica: Ross! (Wanting to be introduced.)
(Joey and Monica look at each other and shrug. Ross enters with Marcel on his shoulder)
Joey: Well, it involved Monica.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is desperately trying to make his Valentines Day gift. He takes a paper cup, turns it upside down, sticks two pencils into the top, and hangs a coat hanger from the bottom.]
Monica: Were just two people who find each other very attractive. Right?
Monica: Hello Dan! I'm really looking forward to Saturday night! Really, really!
Monica: You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!
Chandler: Guys? (They ignore him.) Ive got something important to tell ya. (Still nothing so he walks over and stands in front of the TV.) Guys? (They lean over to try and watch the TV, Chandler mimics them.) Guys?! (Pause) Im gonna ask Monica to marry me.
Phoebe: Yeah. (Looks.) Oh, thats gone too. This is Monicas bathroom right?!
Monica: (To Rachel) How did work go?
Monica: You stink!
Monica: Phoebe knows and she's just trying to freak us out! That's the only explanation for it!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is greeting her Father for their brunch.]
Ross: I just grabbed a spoon. (Ross exits and Monica has no idea what that means.)
Monica: He probably wants you back because you're right for the job.
Monica: All right, let me see. (She grabs the 8 ball.) Will Chandler have sex tonight? (Reads the answer.) Don't count on it. Seems like it works to me.
Monica: Theyre kissing lets just go around them.
Chandler: Monica, that was also true an hour ago! I mean, please, look at you! Your hand is blistered, you can barely stand, your hair is inexplicable! Ok, you've already proven you are just as good as he is, now we've missed our dinner reservations, so now let's just go upstairs, order room service, take a shower and shave your head!
Monica: You sat back and let him have her, you didnt fight at all. Am I right? Do you want the same thing to happen with Emily?
Monica: That's the surprise!
Monica: (overlapping) Let her finish, doctor.
Monica: Y'know go! Go! Right there! (Points)
Rachel: That's fine. So Monica, you are now in control of my love life.
[Cut to the living room where Monica is helping pack a box.]
Phoebe: Yeah well, that's 'cause Monica put me in charge of cups and ice, and Monica is gonna rue the day that she put me in charge of cups and ice.
Monica: (jumping in front of him) No-no! Don't do it! Don't!
MONICA: Ok, we're not having birthday cake, we're having birthday flan.
Monica: All right fine, your guy may have a great body, but our guy is really funny.