words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, he is giving Monica a massage.]
Monica: I can't believe we've never done this before! It's sooo good! So good for Monica!
Monica: That was a half an hour?
Monica: Y'know, I don't like to brag about it, but I give the best massages!
Monica: It's so good, isn't it?
Monica: Say good-bye to sore muscles!
Monica: (entering, in a hurry) Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in a car right outside.
Monica: Ohh my God, I'm so sorry.
Monica: (to the guys) Not the way they're doing it. What, what happened? How did she die?
Monica: What?! What honey?
Monica: Oh, did you catch him?!
Monica: All right, let's go say good-bye.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, after the funeral, everyone is there.]
Monica: Well, at least you scared someone.
Monica: Phoebe, you do seem a little tense. Here, let me help you.
Monica: What are you talking about?
Monica: (indignant) I give good massages! (Ross laughs.) I used to give them to Rachel all the time before she got allergic! And-and-and Chandler loves them! Watch! (She starts giving Chandler a massage.)
Monica: No he's not!
Monica: What?!
Monica: You've been lying to me? I can't believe you'd do that.
Monica: But the minute we start to lie to each other (Pauses after she realizes what she's saying.) And by 'we' I mean society.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is poking his head in.]
Monica: No.
Monica: Oh, please, stop! Look, we're supposed to be honest with each other. I-I just wish you could tell mejust say, "I don't like your massages."
Monica: (starting to cry) See? It's no big deal.
Monica: I'm not crying about that! I'm crying about something that happened at work.
Monica: (bursting into tears) My boyfriend said he didn't like my massages.
Monica: Oh my God! You don't know me at all!
Monica: I'm crying here!!
Monica: Huh. So you're saying like umm, if there was an award for the best bad massage, well who would get that?
Chandler: Oh, it would be you! You! Monica! And you'd get all the votes!
Monica: So maybe they could umm, call the award the Monica?
Monica: Okay. I suck!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey returns from his audition and finds everyone but Phoebe there.]
Monica: Y'know, Joey, I think it's time to give up the bag.
Monica: Ohh, Im such an idiot. I cant believe I actually thought she could change.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Courtney and Matthew are getting ready to do a scene where Monicas sick.]
Monica: (does Rachel's) Nooo!
Monica: Relax, Ross. She's not made of ice cream!
Monica: Wouldn't kick her out of bed. No more Vodka for me! (put her glass down)
Monica: Oh yeah right! (She grabs the money and shoves into her pocket.)
Monica: So you can like, bite, and pull peoples hair and stuff?
Monica: All right, I guess we should go.
Monica: There's nothing we can do. You erased the message!
Monica: Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we were shopping all day.
Monica: Are we playing football or what? Come on you hairy-backed Marries.
Phoebe: You guys! You guys! You don't have to fight over her anymore. (she goes out into the hallway and enters with an even more hideous painting/collage. One of those faceles mannequins heads wearing a blueish dress and orange gloves reaching out into the room. Around the head 3 small dolls are hovering.) Whoever doesn't get Gladys gets Glynnis. (Rachel and Monica are gasping for air at the sight of this monstrous piece of art.)
Chandler: Hey! (Joey doesn't look up, but gestures 'wait a minute' with his finger while he finishes reading the article. Chandler waits for Joey to finish.) I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
[Scene: A Hospital Reception, Monica and Pete are there.]
MR, GELLER: Wait, how do you zoom out? [zooms out and we see an extremely overweight Monica eating a big sandwich] There she is.
Monica: No, but someones really not going to get over that idea, are they?
Monica: Oh, Rachel, sweetie, look, here's a really cute picture of Joey and you at the reception.
Monica: Yeah, y'know I-I made a commitment to you. Yknow what, itd be, itd be fun.
Monica: Yeah, apparently, theyre pretty good seats.
Monica: (shocked) Wow! All right well, I mean, what can you do? If you lost it you lost it.
Monica: Come on, she'll be here any minute.
[Cut to Gary and Monica at the counter.]
Monica: (shocked) Oh my God!
(Monica leaves and Chandler moves to talk to Phoebe.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Monica, Rachel, and the guys are watching Days of Our Lives.]
Monica: Ohhhh!
Monica: Relax! It's Phoebe! Not you!
Monica: (looking at the flyer) This is all of your things.
Rachel: Is Monica here?
(Monica starts taking pictures of Ross and Ben, with the flash.)
Chandler: Monica and I are celebrating our ten-month anniversary, we've got reservations at Ja George.
Monica: No, but she likes me. You abandoned her on a plane to Greece.
MONICA: Dad, it is not. What's with the red light?
Joey: (sheepishly) I finished my book. (Chandler and Monica slowly retreat back to bed.)
Monica: You're going to talk to him! Y'know what? We made a deal, I make your decisions and I say you're going to talk to him.
(Monica stops suddenly and turns around slowly.)
Monica: What?!
Monica: Really?!
Ross: Monica, whatever you do, do not drop that ball!
Monica: (interrupting) The days and nights are hard! I get it! Okay? Look umm, Rachel Im sorry! I have to start getting ready! Im getting married today!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are watching a basketball game on the couch.]
Monica: Why do you guys have so many keys in there anyway?
Monica: (shocked) What?!
Monica: Rach?
Monica: I don't want a cat!
Monica: So umm, when I was in the shower I was thinking about our first night in London
MONICA: MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down.
Monica: So, why don't you just take it back to where you got it?
Monica: Oh myOh good God!
(Joey is leaving and notices Monica, as Monica notices him)
Monica: Rach, why won't they take it back?
(Monica sneezes.)
Monica: Count in our heads as-as good Madlibs.
Monica: So you're moving in with him. What happened?
Monica: Y'know what, thats fine, maybe you havent grown up, but I have.
Monica: Hi.
Rachel: (to Monica) I still can't believe you invited Gavin. Allright, he is the last person I want to see.
Monica: (to Chandler) Hey, you think, you can keep it another night? (She has a really teasing look on her face and keeps twirling Chandler's beard.)
Monica: No Joey, I think he's just watchin' TV.
[Scene: Michelle's, Chandler and Monica are discussing how to bribe the Maitre d'.]
Monica: No! Ace is low! Ace, two, three, four!
Monica: It's easy! Just keep it casual! Give him a kind word, shake his hand and give him the money!
Monica: Why don't you come over tonight? And I'll make you favorite dinner.
Monica: Joey, I think you should consider something a little less risky. I mean, I think in this market, real estate is your best investment.The Fed. just lowered the rates and the interest on your mortgage is totally deductible. (looks at Chandler) That's right, I know some stuff!
Monica: (very excited) Oh, and you know who's selling a great apartment? Richard!
Monica: Wow! You made a profit!
Monica: All right! Come on Monica! Look alive! Come on, look alive!
Monica: Because we won our apartment back!
Monica: Yeah! Oh yes!
Monica: It's not Richard! Okay? It's this new guy and he's really good.
Monica: (To Rachel) Wow! It's really red! You should go see my eye doctor.
Monica: Bye!
Monica: Well, it just seems that
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is at the kitchen table and Chandler is in the living room.]
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
[At the reception, Monica and Ross watch Carol and Susan getting their picture taken.]
Monica: Totally!
Monica: Oh good.
Danny: (Looking at Monica) Absolutely! Is Friday okay?
Phoebe: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
Joey: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
Monica: I'm kidding! I'm kidding!
Phoebe: Oh, right! (Hands Monica back her sunglasses.)
Monica: Okay. (Monica backs off.)
Monica: Oh, thats great! I mean Im-Im sorry, but Im so happy for you. And now I can work for you!
Monica: Dr. Miller? (She covers her right eye and reads from the chart) P E C F D.
Monica: They're still in my coat.
Monica: I love you.
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
Dr. Miller: Very good Monica! You know where they are.
Ross: (entering) Hey! So, uhh, Amanda just-just dropped me off. Yeah, that's one of the things I love about her, she's...uh, she's old enough to drive. (to Monica) So uhh, I guess you're not going to mom and dad's tonight?
Monica: Changes?
(Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are carrying a couch through the door)
(Monica stares at him.)
MONICA: Rachel you have to read this book. It's called Be Your Own Windkeeper. It's about how women need to become more empowered.
Monica: Okay. (She picks a card.) Four.
Rachel: (flinches again) Monica! Come on!
Monica: I wanna say good-bye at the car!
Monica: Chandler! What are you doing here?
Phoebe: Monica! We lived together for years! Ive seen you naked!