words in movies
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, he is giving Monica a massage.]
Monica: I can't believe we've never done this before! It's sooo good! So good for Monica!
Monica: That was a half an hour?
Monica: Y'know, I don't like to brag about it, but I give the best massages!
Monica: It's so good, isn't it?
Monica: Say good-bye to sore muscles!
Monica: (entering, in a hurry) Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in a car right outside.
Monica: Ohh my God, I'm so sorry.
Monica: (to the guys) Not the way they're doing it. What, what happened? How did she die?
Monica: What?! What honey?
Monica: Oh, did you catch him?!
Monica: All right, let's go say good-bye.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, after the funeral, everyone is there.]
Monica: Well, at least you scared someone.
Monica: Phoebe, you do seem a little tense. Here, let me help you.
Monica: What are you talking about?
Monica: (indignant) I give good massages! (Ross laughs.) I used to give them to Rachel all the time before she got allergic! And-and-and Chandler loves them! Watch! (She starts giving Chandler a massage.)
Monica: No he's not!
Monica: What?!
Monica: You've been lying to me? I can't believe you'd do that.
Monica: But the minute we start to lie to each other (Pauses after she realizes what she's saying.) And by 'we' I mean society.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is poking his head in.]
Monica: No.
Monica: Oh, please, stop! Look, we're supposed to be honest with each other. I-I just wish you could tell mejust say, "I don't like your massages."
Monica: (starting to cry) See? It's no big deal.
Monica: I'm not crying about that! I'm crying about something that happened at work.
Monica: (bursting into tears) My boyfriend said he didn't like my massages.
Monica: Oh my God! You don't know me at all!
Monica: I'm crying here!!
Monica: Huh. So you're saying like umm, if there was an award for the best bad massage, well who would get that?
Chandler: Oh, it would be you! You! Monica! And you'd get all the votes!
Monica: So maybe they could umm, call the award the Monica?
Monica: Okay. I suck!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey returns from his audition and finds everyone but Phoebe there.]
Monica: Y'know, Joey, I think it's time to give up the bag.
Monica: Sounds like you need to think about what you want, talk to Gavin, and you definitely should talk to Ross
Monica: Who is it?
Monica: ...If-you-say-so.
Monica: Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...
Monica: Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!
Monica: (walks towards Phoebe and the stripper) Uh, look, officer... uhm Sir...
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Phoebe are sitting ignoring each other. Rachel walks up with two pieces of cake.]
Monica: (laughs) You are so cute! No. No, it was a fight. You deal with it and move on! It's nothing to freak out about.
Monica: You don't know military time?
Monica: Youre supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania. I mean, whats-whats the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the way you get girls to go out with you?
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) (To All) Its the deli again!
Joey: (out of his Monica character) Very good! Drawing on your own experience, I like that!
Monica: Hey, you've got a boyfriend!
Monica: I clunked your heads together!
Monica: I KNOW!
Chandler: Hi Monica.
Monica: You're the most incredible woman I've ever met. How can I lose you? (Phoebe looks very flattered) Now, I don't actually have a ring...
Monica: It’s umm, it has something to do with transponding.
Chandler: (smiling at Monica) Right. (to Rachel) So how're you doing?
Monica: Ow! (Chandler slaps her on her back) Oh, that sounds nice! I am just there for jury duty. They really spruce that place up!
Monica: Is that some kind of boat talk?
[Flashback scene: We cut back to the 80's party. Rachel and Monica are "dancing".]
Monica: No, I think we should save our china for something really special. Like if the Queen of England comes over.
Monica: She and Phoebe took the stripper to the hospital.
Monica: That's what it says here. Flight 421, leaves at 8:40, Newark airport.
Monica: What? When was this?
Monica: Oh my God! That's wild!
Monica: No-no, its not okay! Its not! I mean you were just Youre so incredible! You went through all this time and effort to make this tape for me! Yknow Im just gonnaI, I am gonna make this up to you! I will! I-I am going to cook anything you want in here (points to the kitchen), and I am going to do anything you want in there! (Points to the bedroom.)
Monica: And that's great for you guys, but we want a lawn and a swingset...
Monica: Oh, crap!
Monica: You were my first kiss ever?
Monica: What? Wait! Why? (He turns and heads for the door and she chases after him.) Chandler! Chandler! Wait! Im sorry, I was just playing for one second! I was trying to find you to tell you that, look if you don't want me to see Richard again, I won't! He means nothing to me!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is cooking as Rachel paces nervously.]
Monica: (screaming) Six o'clock!
Rachel: Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and its blue. (Starts to cry again.) Yeah
Monica: Ooh... she backed out.
Monica: (coming) Are you still crying about your damn baby? Pheebs, you gotta keep the line moving, remember, 20 seconds per person. Your see these clowns all the time! (she takes off)
Monica: Now Joey, you go down there and you suck up to him. I mean you suck like youve never sucked before!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, everyone is there and they are finishing watching the first episode of Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Joey is of course Mac.]
Monica: Oh thanks. (Reading the bill) Champagne, strawberries Oh my God! I cant believe Chandler ordered porn on our wedding night!
Ross: I'll do it! (Monica approaches)
Monica (rolling her eyes): oh God.
Monica: What?
(Monica enters the room)
Monica: YES! (Chandler gets an "oh no!" look on his face)
Monica: Rachel, you can go down there, you don't have to smoke. Just say you wanna get some fresh air.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: She's in her room, why?
RACHEL: Oh, please, Monica. You've always hated my lamp, and then, all of a sudden, it's just magically broken?
Monica: I know.
Monica: Okay, the reason why I asked you guys out to brunch today is because I have been doing some thinking about who should be my maid of honor.
Monica: (to the couple on her left) So, how about you huh? How do you know the happy couple?
Monica: Bye.
Monica: (Sounds moved) Really?
Monica: What?
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Phoebe: (to Monica) Help me.
Monica: You really want me to come back?
Monica: Yeah with Chandler not getting paid, we could really use 300 million dollars.
Monica: (thinking) AFFIRMATIVE!
Phoebe: Me too! (turning to Monica) Monica, do you think we could do it?
Monica: Really?
(Monica leaves and Phoebe closes the door behind her and tries to lock it.)
Monica: If only there were a smaller one to clean this one!
Monica: So, you're ready to do this?
Chandler: Oh yeah! (Monica walks outside)
Joey: Hey! (Monica turns and looks at him) Now Im a man of the cloth, but I still have feelings!
Rachel and Monica: I love you.
(Cut to inside Central Perk where Rachel is helping Phoebe. Chandler and Monica enter.)
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are showing everyone the van they bought for the catering business. Its an old Dodge van, that has a cartoon woman riding on a dragon painted on the side of it.]
(we cut to Monica)
Monica: Just subtract twelve.
Monica: Hey.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment.]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: No, we haven't seen her since this morning.
Monica: These are for Erica!
Monica: Honey.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler and Monica are looking through some papers.]
Monica: I want you to meet someone really special. Phoebe, this is Erica. And this is the baby!
Monica: Joey. Erica, baby!
Monica: (entering with Erica and Chandler) Hey you guys.
Monica: Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt be laughing. I should be laying down papers for you! (Runs off laughing which gets Chandler laughing.)
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Chandler: Monica. Calm, self.
Monica: Everyone. Erica, baby!
Monica: (sees what he is doing) Chandler, stop! It is not going to pop open!
Monica: (angry) Ow, what are the chances!
Monica: (enjoying what she's seeing) How's it going?
Monica: (Chandler's laughing) Did someone drop the baton again?
Monica: What is with you?
Monica: How's that now?
Monica: Are you awake?
Erica: Well, if there is anything else you wanna know... (Monica and Chandler look at each other)
Monica: How?
(Time lapse. Chandler and Monica are in bed now)
Monica: Yeah, but maybe we're just over-reacting.
[Scene: The Craps Table, Monica is still on her roll, only this time Chandler's with her and she has a huge crowd of people around.]
(Cut to Monica holding up her shirt, revealing her bra. An actor stands beside her, holding a pen in his hand.)