words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is serving Joey, Ross, and Monica their drinks.]
Rachel: And a nice hot cider for Monica. (Hands it to her.)
Monica: Aww, thank you. (Notices something.) Uh Rach?
Monica: Why does my cinamon stick have an eraser?
(She takes the pencil out of Monica's coffee and Monica puts her cup down in disgust.)
Monica: Yeah, Chandler... you've been there for five years.
Monica: (taps Phoebe on her shoulder) Um... hi there.
Phoebe: Hi! (turns back to Chandler, then to Monica) Oh, yeah, no, I know. You're a chef. I know, and I thought of you first, but um, Chandler's the one who needs a job right now, so....
Monica: Well, what kind of food is he looking for?
Monica: (excited) Oh my God!
Phoebe: OK. (pause) Oh Monica! Guess what!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler walks in, wearing a suit.]
(Monica enters, excited.)
Monica: Oh, I love my life, I love my life!
Monica: So great! He showed me where the restaurant's going to be. It's this, it's this cute little place on 10th Street. Not too big, not too small. Just right.
Monica: So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. You know, kind of like an audition. And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me because then you can 'ooh' and 'ahh' and make yummy noises.
Rachel: (pause) And Monica, what are you going to make?
Monica: I don't know. I don't know. It's just going to be so great!
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there but Ross and Chandler. Monica is making food, and having everyone try it.]
Monica: (to Joey) OK, try this salmon mousse.
Monica: Is it better than the other salmon mousse?
Monica: Yeah, well, is that better?
Joey: I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. I'm just happy I'm keeping it down, y'know?
Monica: (brings a plate of tiny appetizers over) Here you go, maybe this'll cheer you up.
Monica: It's supposed to be that small. It's a pre-appetizer. The French call it an amouz-bouche.
(Phone rings. Monica answers it.)
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Wendy! (Listens) Yeah, eight o'clock. (Listens) What did we say? Ten dollars an hour?... (Listens) OK, great. (Listens) All right, I'll see you then. Bye. (hangs up)
Monica: Oh, I asked one of the waitresses at work if she'd help me out.
Monica: Well... of course I thought of you! But... but...
Monica: But, you see, it's just... this night has to go just perfect, you know? And, well, Wendy's more of a... professional waitress.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone. Rachel walks in and overhears the conversation.]
Monica: (shouting on phone) Wendy, we had a deal! (Listens) Yeah, you promised! Wendy! Wendy! Wendy! (hangs up)
Monica: Wendy bailed. I have no waitress.
Monica: Ten dollars an hour.
Monica: Twelve dollars an hour.
Monica: You know, Rachel, when you ran out of your wedding, I was there for you. I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you... (Rachel isn't buying it, desperate) twenty dollars an hour.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, later. Rachel is waitressing, Monica is cooking. Phoebe walks in with Steve (Crystal Duck winner Jon Lovitz).]
Monica: Hi Steve!
Steve: Hello, Monica. (to Rachel) Hello, greeter girl.
Monica: (to Steve) This is Rachel.
Phoebe: (overemphasizing) Mmmmmm! Everything smells so delicious! You know, I can't remember a time I smelt such a delicious combination of (Monica signals her to stop) of, OK, smells.
Monica: Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour?
Monica: Yeah, I think we're ready for our first course. (Steve sits, Monica brings over a tray) OK, um, these are rot-shrimp ravioli, and celantro pondou sauce... (Steve starts to eat them one by one, quickly)... with just a touch of mints... and... (he finishes)... ginger.
Monica: I'm so glad you liked them!
Monica: Oh, well... um, that's all there are of these. But in about eight and a half minutes, we'll be serving some delicious onion tartlets.
(Rachel tries to get Monica's attention to tell her Steve is stoned. She pretends to drag on a joint, and Monica thinks she's giving her the 'OK' signal. Then Rachel does it again, inhaling deeply this time. Monica waves it off as though she doesn't believe it.)
Monica: (joining him and taking the taco shells) You know that? You don't want to spoil your appetite.
Monica: You know, if you just wait another... six and a half minutes...
Monica: No, we don't. (reaches for box)
Monica: Why don't you just have a seat here? (he sits at the table, then tries to secretly eat the Gummi-bears. Monica spots him.) OK... give me the Gummi-bears.
Monica: Give them to me.
Monica: No, give me the...
Monica: (furious) That's it! Dinner is over!
Monica: What?
Monica: Why? It's just that I've waited seven years for an opportunity like this, and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet?
Monica: I know... it's just... I thought this was, you know... it.
Monica: Yeah, you're my husband. I'm not gonna live in a different state than you for 208 days out of the year.
(Chandler grins, while Monica is less enthusiastic.)
Monica: Okay, umm, youre a loon.
Chandler: No, no, but they are going to lease us a Ford Focus. (Monicas not impressed.) Ill get out of it.
Monica: Ok fine. I'll handle this. (goes to Phoebe who's talking to Rachel) Phoebe?
Monica: (running over to stop Rachel) Hey Rach, the tampons here are only a penny. Lets stock up. (takes her into the bathroom)
Monica: God! Look at all these tickets! It's so exciting! You know I haven't won anything since the sixth grade.
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all those flaws, why can't you accept me for this?
(Monica takes a big swig of her martini.)
Monica: So, maybe I am a little high maintenance. And maybe Rachel is a little bit of a pushover. But you know what we decided you are?
MONICA: So you can't lose, it's there in the title. Wonderfullness is baked right in.
Joey: Monica face it, Chandler is against marriage. And-and always will be!
Monica: It says “Do it!”. And behold she did adopt onto them a baby. And it was good.
Phoebe: (with a fancy dress, still playing and singing): It wasn't just that she was fat, the woman smelled like garbage! Everyone! It wasn't just that she was fat the woman smelled like garbaaaaaage! (to Monica, showing her dress) Classy, uh?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are cautiously serving Phoebe some tea.]
Monica: (sounds desperate, knowing what Rachel is trying to do) I haven't really settled on a spot yet!
Chandler: (entering, happily, with a bottle of champagne, thinking that Monica is the only one there) Ha-ha-ha-(sees everyone)-enh-enh. I'm so glad you guys are all here! My office finally got wrinkle free fax paper!
[This starts a series of flashbacks starting with Monica and Chandler forcing Joey to keep his new found knowledge of their secret relationship in Monicas bedroom in The One With All the Kips.]
Monica: Oh, how do you play the shadow game?
Monica: Uhm the... the ministry... of names... bureau...
Monica: (freaking out) What-what-whats that now?!
Monica: Oh my God, I wrecked your baby!! (runs into the bedroom)
Monica: (Offering Ross the skull) Licorice?
Cassie: Thanks for letting me stay here! I mean Monicas place was nice, but her fiancee sure stares a lot.
Monica: (with no hesitation) Sex!
Monica: (On phone) Hi, Nancy. Hi, it's Monica Geller. I'm good. Listen, I'm looking for a job in Tulsa. Well yeah, my husband has been relocated...Because I love him! No, I don't want a job in New York. Javo (sp?) is looking? Oh my God! He asked for me personally? Oh my God! Oh, wow, this is really flattering, but I'm moving to Tulsa. Yeah, so if you would tell Javo (sp?) 'I'll take it!'
Monica: Thats because he wasnt invited because of the way he behaved at our engagement party.
Monica: Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone. You just gotta do it.
Monica: All right then. (He leans in to kiss her goodnight, but she quickly kisses him on the cheek and pats his shoulder.) Bye.
Monica: Look what I got! Look what I got! Look what I got! (She shows Rachel what she bought. She bought a little leather jacket and a little cowboy outfit for the babies.) Can you believe they make these for little people?
Monica: So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesnt mean hes great in bed.
Monica: Anyway erm, are you going to get a handyman to install this stuff?
Monica: Okay! Okay! Make me sterile, but okay.
Joey: Rach, I told you everything I knew last night! Look, it's not that big of a deal, so Monica and Chandler are doing it.
Monica: You want a job? Turn off "Oprah," and send out a resume!
Monica: (To Chandler) Shhhh!!!
Monica: Okay. No need to panic. Deep breathes everyone. Okay umm uh, were just gonna have to spend some time and put the CDs in the right cases.
Phoebe: (spitting the cookie out onto a napkin) Oh, sweet Je(Beep)sus! Oh! Monica, these are the (laughing) cookies they serve in hell!
Monica: And then were gonna have a little Middle Eastern cous-cous. Something we can eat, with our hands.
Monica: Fine, you can have the bath, but I am taking your boat. Now youre just a girl in a tub!
Monica: Crematorium Chris? Sure!
Monica: Wow, this is so weird. I just realized this might be the last time we'll all be hanging out together.
[Scene: A hospital, Phoebe is recovering from her heart attack as Ross, Monica, and Chandler are there to comfort and support her.]
Monica: (to a whole group) Now, these are-are more realistic, but perishable.
Monica: Look! You knew this about me when you married me! You agreed to take me in sickness and in health. Well, this is my sickness!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Joey are standing at the counter. Monica is flipping a light switch on and off next to the door.]
Phoebe: I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! Thats it!! Thats everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay!! (They all cheer again.) And-and girls this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean. (Rachel and Monica look intrigued and as they all head into Central Perk, Rachel picks up the hippity-hop that Phoebe left behind.)
Monica: You know thats nice, y'know we could put it back there after the surgeons remove it from your colon!
Monica: No! Joey and Ross dont know anything and Chandler still thinks that Phoebes pregnant.
Monica: Okay, good, cause umm, well maybe we could have a little workout of our own...
Chandler: Oh thats not true! Thats not true! I got her that backpack and she loved it! I remember how much she was crying the day when that big dog ran off with it (notices the look on Monica and Phoebes faces.) Oh, there was no big dog. All right this sucks! I already got her this briefcase, and I had R.G. put on it (Phoebe looks confused.) Her initials
Erica: (To Chandler) We had a good time. By the way, I wanted to ask you something. It would really mean a lot to me, if the baby was a boy, that you name him after my father, Jiminy Billy Bob (Monica smiles at Chandler and his he looks shocked and scared, getting no support from his wife)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are there as Phoebe enters carrying a large box.]
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, Rachel and Monica are arriving to talk to Ross after the lecture, but are there early.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe, still defying reality, are now throwing a bouquet at each other, pretending to catch the actual bouquet at an actual wedding.]
[Scene: The Wedding reception, Ross and Emily are in the bathroom and Emily is yelling at him. Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are standing outside the doorway.]
Chandler: Thank you Gunther, put it there. (He gets up, and shakes Gunther's hand. A bunch of coins fall out his hand. He sits down next to Monica.) Definitely not easier with coins. (Joey gets up and picks up the coins. Chandler thinks, Joey is just helping him to pick them up.) Thank you.
Monica: So what if he wants to sleep with her? I mean, she's single and he's cute.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Chandler enters as Monica comes from the bathroom.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica is in the kitchen, Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! ...Okay, Monica, y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing.
[Cut to later, Phoebe is still in the chair and Rachel is laying down as Monica enters.]
Monica: Okay, Rachel, do you have any idea how painful it is to tell someone that you love them and not have them say it back?
Monica: Ok, I dont wanna be negative so Ill say that most of the signs you bought are good.
Monica: Keep on roaming Bert! We don't want any crazy today!
MRS GREEN: Monica! You look gorgeous! Last time I saw you, it was eat or be eaten.
MONICA: I don't want him to think that I'm having an affair.
Monica: All right, that Ill retract. But I stand by my review, I know food and that wasnt it. Youre marinara sauce tasted like tomato juice! You should serve it with vodka and a piece of celery.
Monica: What's the matter, officer? Has someone been bad? (looks over to Phoebe and she opens the door, and to their dismay, the stripper is an old, short, fat guy who looks exhausted)
[Cut to Monicas work kitchen, shes on fire again and Joey is putting her out.]
(Chandler enters the bathroom, and Monica is standing there in a towel, with her hair stuck in the shower curtain.)
[Scene: Monica's Bedroom, Monica and Phoebe are waxing their legs.]
Rachel: See look Amy, we're a lot closer to Monica and Chandler. We see them every day. And truthfully honey, you don't seem very connected to the baby.
Chandler: No, he visited a little town south of throw up. (Monica laughs hysterically.) So what was Phoebes secret?
Monica: Fine. (Brenda comes in to use the bathroom and adjusts her pink bra strap on the way.) Shes wearing my bra!
Monica: From the tequila factory?
MONICA: Well, my financially challenged friends, I split my money and I bought some shares of CHP and ZXY.
Monica: (Hushes her) Alright, great. Thanks a lot. (Hangs up) I'm going to tap class.
Monica: Okay. (They approach the craps table.)
[Scene: Hospital. Phoebe is there stroking Coma Guy's hair, when Monica enters with a bunch of balloons.]
Monica: Well that is great. And seriously, she seems very nice.
Chandler: You bet I did, Ben, put it there! (He shakes Ben's hand, but the money falls out of his hands) (to Monica) Well, it would have worked this time, if his hands weren't so damn small! (Realizes, that Ben is standing right there) Ho, ho, ho!
Phoebe: I know! Monicas gonna have a baby! Hey, can this count as her something new?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is mixing some Thanksgiving treat (Im assuming mashed potatoes) in a bowl.]
MONICA: Well for your information he happens to be one of the brightest, most sophisticated, sexiest men I've ever been with.
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Monica: I told you you were a bath person! Hey, when you get out, maybe I can give you a facial!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler and Monica are holding the twins. Joey and Phoebe are sitting by the window, while Ross and Rachel are standing together. The apartment is completely empty. Two men are carrying a large dresser.]
Monica: All right... you're right. We're sorry. Now let's wake up Emma and get the fun time started!
Monica: Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!
Monica: All right, all right. Maybe I can fit them in if I just do some rearranging. But uh, Rachel may actually have to sit at the bar!
Monica: Okay, were gonna need a distraction.
Monica: Oh. Thank you. Ohhh, thank you very much. Oh, thank you for coming. (Theres a knock on the door.) Uh, just a second!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Santa (Chandler), Superman (Joey), Ben, and Monica are listening to the Holiday Armadillo (Ross) finish telling the story of Hanukkah.]
Monica: Wait-wait, guys! If-if we follow the rules, it's still fun and it means something!
Monica: Im sorry, they just, they just look so good! And the saleswoman was looking at me like, "Oh, these are way too expensive for you."
[Monica goes to the stove.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are there, discussing the night before.]
Monica: You dated her!
Monica: I have like five times, but the guy is so charming, that I go up there to yell and then I end up apologizing to him.