words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Monica: Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So what country is this guy from?
Monica: Wheres that?
Monica: I dont have an atlas.
Monica: Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
Monica: Hold on.
Monica: Kay, here you go. (Hands her this tiny little globe.)
Monica: Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
Monica: Oh, no thanks.
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Monica: Wow! Its small.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: No.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
Monica: All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. (holds up a notepad) Call Rachel.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Monica: Yeah, well kinda cute, like really kinda cute, or kinda cute like your friend Spackel Back Larry?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Monica: Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Mischa laughs) Why? What did I say?
Monica: Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
Mischa: (to Monica) So I was wondering....
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Monica: Im also thinking about opening up my own restaurant.
Phoebe: Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?
Monica: Well, I was having a conversation.
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Mischa: (to Monica) Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time in three years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would let me enjoy that, no!! (to Sergei) You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English, Sergei?
Monica: Hey, the mans dog just died.
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.]
Monica: Okay, I just don't get why you like it so much.
Monica: Chandler, please, come on. Look at him. (Pointing to a picture of Ralph on a magazine,.)
Monica: Honey, we dont really have to go to this thing tonight do we?
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Phoebe: Oh, okay! (reading) "Would I go back to Allesandros? Sure, but Id have to order two meals, one for me and one for the guy pointing the gun to my head." (to Monica) Wow! You really laid into this place.
Monica: Nothing, um, it's just, um... It's Roger.
Monica: All right, I'll see you guys later. (raises)
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: Ill get it.
Ross: LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go find him and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
Monica: Heres the plan! Okay? Im going to leave you get a look at Brendas bra!
Monica: Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let me know how that one turns out.
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica answers the door and lets her parents in. They are carrying boxes.]
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.]
(Both Monica and Rachel laugh.)
Joey: So Monica, still going out with Dr. Boring huh?
Monica: Come on Rach, come on. Lets see whats it like to be on a winning team for a change.
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, they are taking Phoebe to the hospital but Chandler and Monica hold back.]
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
Rachel: "Im Monica, I dont get phone messages from interesting people. Ever!"
Monica: Come here. (He does, and they kiss.) Okay, be right back.
(She takes the pencil out of Monica's coffee and Monica puts her cup down in disgust.)
Chandler: Monica, I was wondering if you can make me some of that righteous mac and cheese like last year.
Monica: What are you guys doing here?
Monica: Because theyll know weve been listening.
Monica: So whenever youre ready to apologize to me, I will forgive you. Good day! (Monica and Phoebe reenter the apartment and Monica closes the door on a stunned Mrs. Green.) I cant feel my legs!
Monica: Oh, I can't pass for 22?
Monica: Are you alright?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at a table and Phoebe is on the couch. Chandler and Monica can be seen outside, shes lecturing him, and pushes him inside. He then nods to Rachel, and is obviously counting off the seconds in his head and then Monica makes a grand enterance.]
(Monica points the remote at her TV, and punches out a key combination from the book, but the dreaded SAP logo remains and Spanish still comes forth.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
(Phoebe joins Chandler on the couch as there is a knock on the door which Monica answers.)
Monica: How's it going?
Monica: Sure! If you're just gonna hang out as friends, then maybe I'll join ya. You know, I'm your friend (to Phoebe) and Mike's friend (Mike is sceptical).
Monica: He's a dropper!
Monica: I am 26.
Monica: Burning's good.
Monica: Wow! That Mike thing was interesting! I don't know what's gonna happen with Phoebe and David.
Monica: Oh-my-god Rachel! (Rushing out to look over the edge) Rachel!
Monica: Really?
Monica: We all chipped in.
Rachel: And a nice hot cider for Monica. (Hands it to her.)
Mrs. Geller: (to Monica) Your grandmother would have hated this.
Monica: Well there's not much we can do.
Monica: (to Rachel) Hey! Joey said no autographs! But if she's gettting one, then I want one too: To Monica. And none of this "best wishes" crap. I want "love".
Monica: Im tellingIf you put that in her apartment youll never hear the end of it.
(Brenda bends down to use the dustpan and Monica leans over to look for the stain, but leans so far over she falls out of the chair.)
Monica: Hah, no no no no no no no no no no.
[Scene: The New School, Monica, carrying her dish, and Joey are confronting the food critic.]
Monica: Im so glad you liked it.
Monica: Do this for me! Come on, I catch you looking at womans breasts all the time!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time has passed. The five are sitting around the coffee table talking.]
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, Phoebe is trying to hide the bed from Monica.]
Monica (as Rachel): Hi.
Rachel (as Monica): Hi, this is my friend Rachel.
Monica (as Rachel): Thank you.
Monica: I think it's totally insane, I mean, they work for the hospital. It's like returning to the scene of the crime. You know, I say we blow off the dates.
Monica: Yes? (jumping as Rachel punches her arm) ..yes, she is.
Monica: Uh, you left out the stupid part.
Rachel (as Monica): Right.
Monica: Oh...
Monica: Oh, I didnt know you liked football.
Monica: Oh, I asked one of the waitresses at work if she'd help me out.
(Rachel goes into her room and Monica enters the living room as Ross is leaving.)
Monica: Hi, Geoffrey.
Monica: Hi, come on in.
Monica: I know, but you have to open it today! (Hands it too him.)
Monica: It's uh...
(Monica and Rachel both cover their eyes)
Rachel: Oh, Monica! Would you stop being such a wuss?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are telling Joey, Rachel, and Monica of their bank woes.]
Monica: What?
Monica: What!?
Monica: It's not ok to do it in a doctor's office but it is ok to do it in a parked car behind a Taco Bell?
Monica: (getting angry) What!!?
Monica: Sure, every time, you're such a princess...
Monica: Because they dont know were dating. (Again, trying to quickly change subjects.) Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? (Goes to the sink and the stove to cook.)
Rachel: Ohh Oh, honey here. Take it all. (Pours the entire large bowl into her bag and closes the door.) Monica! We need more candy?
Monica: (as Rachel) I used to wet my bed.
Rachel: (as Monica) I use my breasts to get other people's attention.
Fat Monica: Oh gosh, listen if you and Chip do it tonight, promise me you'll tell me everything.
(Monica glares triumphantly across the room, scaring Rachel who also stands up.)
Monica: It will not be fine. We'll get in trouble.
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
Monica: Yeah, you have to go fight for her!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about trying to give Joey some money.]
Chandler: Come on Monica, its our Valentines Day. Please? Please-please, please?
Monica: Thank you.
Monica:: sweetie it's ok, I still love you, let me be a part of this.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Yes.
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on the couch still doing the crossword. Chandler is in the kitchen.]
Monica: (to Phoebe) Oh my God! Did you hear that? She hired me because she thinks Im good.
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi, remember us?
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...