words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Monica: Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So what country is this guy from?
Monica: Wheres that?
Monica: I dont have an atlas.
Monica: Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
Monica: Hold on.
Monica: Kay, here you go. (Hands her this tiny little globe.)
Monica: Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
Monica: Oh, no thanks.
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Monica: Wow! Its small.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: No.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
Monica: All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. (holds up a notepad) Call Rachel.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Monica: Yeah, well kinda cute, like really kinda cute, or kinda cute like your friend Spackel Back Larry?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Monica: Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Mischa laughs) Why? What did I say?
Monica: Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
Mischa: (to Monica) So I was wondering....
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Monica: Im also thinking about opening up my own restaurant.
Phoebe: Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?
Monica: Well, I was having a conversation.
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Mischa: (to Monica) Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time in three years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would let me enjoy that, no!! (to Sergei) You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English, Sergei?
Monica: Hey, the mans dog just died.
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.]
Monica: (takes the phone from Ross) Come on. (Answering phone) Hello? (Listens) Im sorry you have the wrong number. (Listens) (Whispering) Okay, Ill call you later dad. I love you. (Hangs up.)
Monica: Aren't you gonna...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is eating jam straight out of the jar, and Chandler is staring at him in amazement. Joey offers him some.]
Monica: Are you a virgin?
Monica: How did you know that?! (Runs to yell at Joeys apartment.) Joey! Chandler!! Its time!
Monica: Hello, Joey.
Monica: It was.
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
Monica: How many kids were we gonna have?
Monica: ...love you.
Monica: A monkey. Have you seen a monkey?
(Monica comes back to the table with plates of food.)
Joey: Oh! My head! Oh! (Hes sitting on the chair, lies back, and puts his feet up for Monica to rub.) Oh!
Rachel: Oh no? Pheebs? Monica? Do I know anything about babies?
Monica: Yes! And that would be a shut-down!
Monica: What's with the guitar?
Monica: What you guys don't understand is, for us, kissing is as important as any part of it.
Monica: Okay, umm-umm, I'll just--I'll be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah...
(Monica and Chandler's room. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler have their ears pressed against the wall, and Joey looks at them)
Monica: I want a baby.
Monica: Oh yeah? When?
Monica: Well?
Monica: No, I haven't seen him.
Monica: Aww... (They hug)
(Monica and Rachel's door opens and Rachel and Paolo emerge)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that same day. Joey and Chandler are eating pizza, and Phoebe is trying to knit something.]
MONICA: Did they just kill off Joey?
Monica: Nope. Going to the Big Apple Circus today.
Phoebe: Okay. Oh but dont tell them Monicas pregnant because, they frown on that.
Monica: I don't need an actual man, just a couple of his best swimmers. And there, there are places you can go to get that stuff.
Monica: Ah no, you see, someone was supposed to take them down around New Years... but obviously someone forgot.
[Scene: Monicas birthday, Monica is now dressed and is being helped out by Chandler and Rachel.]
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Monica: (chasing after him) Chandler! It happens to lots of guys! You-you-you were probably tired, you had a lot of champagne, dont worry about it!
Phoebe: Damn you Monica Geller hyphen Bing!
Joey: (entering) Hey uh Monica, I cant remember. Did we say we were gonna meet here or at the movies?
Monica: All right. Have you said, "I love you?" You could say, I love you.
MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
Monica: Listen, uh, you told me something that was really difficult for you. And I, I-I figured if you could be honest, then I can to.
Monica: Because I need the money, and I thought that itd be a great way to get rid of that last little schmidgen of self-respect.
Monica: Can we come in?
(Monica opens the door.)
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Ross, can I?
Monica: Oh, friends first, drunk in London, you know the story. I've got a better question for you: Do you or any of your blood relatives have diabetes?
(Monica holds Ben.)
Monica: He is so amazing.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Mr. and Mrs. Geller enter looking particularly refreshed. Monica follows looking rather pale.]
Monica: Awww, look at Aunt Monica's little boy!
Monica: (slams down cards) I hate this game!
Monica: Okay, I think I get how to do this.
Monica: OK, we got the cole slaw, we got the buns...
Monica: Hi! Hey, Pete youre back! Hey, check this out. (She starts to skate over to him)
JOEY: Oh, hey, Monica, we've got a question.
Monica and Phoebe: Ewww!
Monica: Hey.
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
Monica: No!! Why didnt you make a copy and-and keep it in a fireproof box and keep it at least a hundred yards from the original?!!
Monica: You're going to China?
Monica: Joey... we always know what you mean.
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: How was that possible?
Monica: And Mindy, your maid of...?
Monica: Okay, so you were trying to play bad this whole time.
MONICA: I'm just easing you in.
Monica: So, uh, have you ever thought about being there for her?
(Monica rolls her eyes.)
Monica: Think about it.
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Monica: Gosh, doesn't it seem like a million years ago?
Monica: Y'know, just be there for her.
Monica: I can't believe he did this.
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Monica: Are you freaking kidding me, Green?
Monica: Ethan, it's um... it's icky.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Hey-hey, how goes the dancing? Gay yet?
Monica: Rachel, what're you gonna say to him?
Monica: I just thought he was nice, y'know?
Monica: From here to the airport?
Monica: Okay then, I dont stink. Im a good chef. Okay. (Starts to leave.)
Ross: So, Phoebs owes $7.50, Monica, you owe $10, and Rachel, you owe fifteen big ones.
Monica: Its only been a couple of hours, so just give it some time.
Monica and Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?!?
Monica: Wait a minute! Unless, we give her all gifts she can use after shes done being pregnant. Like-like umm, regular coffee, Tequila.
Monica: Is there? Is there someone else?
Monica: Why isn't it working out?
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Monica: Oh, from who?
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
Monica: Aww, the only reason you want to go out with me because my blond wig, and the big boobs, and the fact that I serve you food.
Monica: Oh, why?
Monica: (gets up) No, no, no, no, no, no pressure, no pressure!
Monica: No, you can't! Friends hooking up is a bad idea.
Monica: Okay. (They both jump up to head for there room, but Monica stops.) But wait, we cant. My Cousin Cassie is in the guest room, were supposed to have lunch.
Monica: No, its not bad. Its not bad at all. Its-its really nice.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: Oh, hes catching up to her!
Monica: I'm sure they'll be here soon.