words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Monica: Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So what country is this guy from?
Monica: Wheres that?
Monica: I dont have an atlas.
Monica: Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
Monica: Hold on.
Monica: Kay, here you go. (Hands her this tiny little globe.)
Monica: Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
Monica: Oh, no thanks.
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Monica: Wow! Its small.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: No.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
Monica: All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. (holds up a notepad) Call Rachel.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Monica: Yeah, well kinda cute, like really kinda cute, or kinda cute like your friend Spackel Back Larry?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Monica: Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Mischa laughs) Why? What did I say?
Monica: Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
Mischa: (to Monica) So I was wondering....
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Monica: Im also thinking about opening up my own restaurant.
Phoebe: Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?
Monica: Well, I was having a conversation.
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Mischa: (to Monica) Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time in three years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would let me enjoy that, no!! (to Sergei) You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English, Sergei?
Monica: Hey, the mans dog just died.
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.]
Rachel: Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Yeah, I'm sure your ex-wife will be more than happy to move to another country so you can patch things up with your new wife.
Monica: Ok.
Monica: (long pause) Ok.
Monica: When you were little you slept through the Grand(Pointing again)Oh fffff .
Monica: Yes... What is the end of that sentence?
Monica: There are no tickets on the nightstand!
Rachel: Uh, yeah. Uh, Monica, y'know, honey, I've been thinking about it and I've decided thisthis whole Ross thing, it's just not a good idea.
Phoebe: Yes, and Im sorry. I-I know things worked out for Chandler and Monica, but thats very rare.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, time lapse, Chandler is fully dressed and slowly walking out of the bedroom with a distressed look on his face.]
Monica: I got it.
Monica: Yeah, I guess.
Monica: Hi honey!
Monica: Oh, of course, it's so nice to see you again, Zack!
Monica: (turns around and she's quite shocked) Excuse me?
Monica: Chandler!
Monica: Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
Monica: Uh!
Monica: Tell me about yourself, Zack!
Monica: Im fine-d. Im fine-d! Yknow, its a really hard word to say.
(Monica hears that and is suddenly very interested in Zack)
Monica: Hey, it was very moving! You're just heartless!
Monica: Hey guys! Dinner's ready!
Joey: (entering) Hey! Hey Chandler look, I know youre mad, but I just want to say Im sorry. I-I was a total jerk. Completely o-over the line. Uh, I just I hate pulp! Yknow? I mean, yknow how Monica feels about low fat mayonnaise?
Janine: (entering from her room) Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorry about tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of going to this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
Monica & Chandler: Sure! Alright...
Monica: Hi, glad you could come.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's]
Monica: (pause) No.
Monica: Does seem pretty perfect.
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Monica: Yeah, I'm sure.
Monica: I think I feel ok about it. Actually I think I feel really good about it.
Monica: That is so sweet. I love you. (they kiss)
Monica: Adoption.
Monica: So this is it, we're really gonna adopt?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Monica: Who did we fight in World War I?
Monica: (excitedly) Oh my God, we're gonna be parents!
Monica: Yes! Maybe its a false positive. Are you sure you peed on the stick right?
Monica: Hi! Umm, Im Monica Geller, Im the chef at Alessandros.
Chandler: (smiling, surprised) Oh yeah? (looks towards the kitchen, worried) Listen, don't tell Monica, she'll rip your heart right out.
Monica: (to Chandler) See?
Monica: At least you took me down with you!
Monica: I guess, in time.
Monica: What?! I thought hed love it! His favorite kid's book was the Velveteen Rabbit!
Monica: Ohmygod! Rat baby! Rat baby! Rat baby! (screams from another room)
Monica: Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop! (Breaks it up.) Now listen, no ones gonna fight in this apartment.
Chandler: Okay. (Pause) You wont believe what Monicas older brother just said to me!
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
[Scene: Back in New York, Monica and Chandler in Central Perk on the couch]
Monica: What? (looks very shocked) Why?
Chandler: Shhhhhhhhh!!! (Monica enters) Im sorry, I thought maybe Id make some warm milk and it would help me sleep.
(Rachel turns around and sees Chandler and Monica arriving)
(Monica and Chandler reach the group)
Monica: Yeah, right!
Monica: (to Chandler) Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
Monica: Ok!
Chandler: (slaps him on the shoulder) Nice! (goes to Monica)
Monica: (looking very serious) I need to talk to you.
Monica: Do you really think marrying someone else is the right answer?
Monica: What are you serious? You wanna marry him? Wha... What about Mike?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is pouring wine for her boyfriend, Dr. Roger.]
Monica: Alright heres something, it says to try holding the baby close to your body and then swing her rapidly from side to side.
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Monica: (sarcastically) Well, I hope you're happy!
Monica: (to chandler) Twenty bucks says they're married within the month.
Monica: Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
Monica: Who do you wanna fool around with?
Monica: Un, no you didn't! You must be mistaken!
Monica: Oh my God, he's gonna do it now. Please, I cannot watch this, let's go.
Monica: IT'S THE HUMIDITY!
Monica: The sun is out!
Monica: I know (she snuggles to him)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's room. Monica and Chandler are in bed.]
Monica: Damn it!
Monica: Yeah!
Rachel: All right! Well, uh... (to Monica) we're gonna hit the beach?
CHANDLER: Can I uh see something? (Takes Ben. When he puts him close to Monica, Ben cries. When he moves Ben away, he stops crying.)
Monica: Oh. (Holds on to it.) (To herself) Youre not gettin it.
Monica: (disappointed) Why not?
Monica: So, what are we gonna do today?
Monica: ... Phoebe...?
Monica: I'm not always that bad!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
Monica: But then how do we know who wins?
Monica: Sure! Got to!
Monica: (smiling) OK!
Monica: (nearly shouting) One thousand...
Monica: Aww!
(Monica and Mike start to play ping pong. Mike scores)
(Monica rolls her eyes)
Monica: How much were you thinking?
Monica: Hell, yeah!
Monica: Ha! My point!
Phoebe: (picks up a coin from her bra) Monica, you call it.
RACHEL: [to Monica at the counter] Ooh, Julie's so smart, Julie's so special.
Monica: (from her bedroom) Okay! Ill be right out. Im slipping into something a little less comfortable, and a little more slutty.