words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is taking a jar of olives out of the fridge.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
Monica: Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
Monica: Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So what country is this guy from?
Monica: Wheres that?
Monica: I dont have an atlas.
Monica: Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
Monica: Hold on.
Monica: Kay, here you go. (Hands her this tiny little globe.)
Monica: Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
Monica: Oh, no thanks.
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is showing Monica where Sergeis country is.]
Monica: Wow! Its small.
Monica: So you had fun, huh?
Monica: No.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
Monica: All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. (holds up a notepad) Call Rachel.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Monica: Yeah, well kinda cute, like really kinda cute, or kinda cute like your friend Spackel Back Larry?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Phoebe are on their dates with Sergei and Mischa.]
Monica: Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Mischa laughs) Why? What did I say?
Monica: Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
Mischa: (to Monica) So I was wondering....
Mischa: (to Phoebe, very quickly) Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinks you look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun. (to Monica) So you're a chef?
Monica: Im also thinking about opening up my own restaurant.
Phoebe: Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?
Monica: Well, I was having a conversation.
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.]
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Mischa: (to Monica) Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time in three years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would let me enjoy that, no!! (to Sergei) You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English, Sergei?
Monica: Hey, the mans dog just died.
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Monica: It will be my pleasure. (to Phoebe) My guy has diplomatic coupons. Your guy cant even say coupons. (they leave)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.]
Monica: Rachel?!
Monica: Would you ever be a surrogate for anyone?
Monica: Hey, we would still be living here if hadnt gotten the question wrong!
Monica: In that cute, little, sweet way she just did?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are arguing.]
Monica: Hes in a different room! Hes really that loud?
Monica: Yknow dad, Chandler is one of Rosss very best friends!
Monica: Okay, count to three. 1. 2. 3!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Okay! Okay, let's race! First one there wins! Ha-ha! (Runs out the door and everyone watches her leave.)
Monica: Rach, youre gonna come though arent you?
Monica: Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about. I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom.
Monica: Were hanging out.
Monica: I never knew that either.
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Rachel, Monica, Phoebe, and Ross are holding the giant poking device.]
Monica: Ill pick it up for you!
Monica: Wait a minute. What about that summer during college that you lived with grandma, and you tried to make it as a dancer?
Monica: Oh, dad, turn it off.
Monica: But it didnt. Say hello to Mrs. Chatracus.
Monica: Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe is there with her puppy and is trying to sing it to sleep as Chandler enters.]
Monica: You know what Id love to do? I would like to go to France and eat nothing but bread and cheeseNot even bread, just cheese. No, I want the bread. Yeah. Ah, and pastries (Breathlessly) And pate. Oh, Im really not high, its just I used to be fat.
Mrs. Geller: Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.
Monica: (to Ross) I can't believe you did that.
Monica: No. No, just, just, just a couple more boxes. It-it-its no big deal, all right, Im-Im cool. You gotta help me out with a couple more boxes!
Monica: Yeah Joey shes Rachels got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Yknow what, if were gonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)
[Flashback to Joey interrupting a bath Monica and Chandler are sharing in The One With All The Kissing. Monica dives underwater as Joey opens the door.]
Rachel, Monica, Roy, and Chip: Bye.
Monica: (seeing the decision) Nooooo. Youre really not going?
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, both Monica and Phoebe gasp.]
Monica: You know what, everything's gonna be okay.
Monica: Just the matter of ...payment?
Monica: How's it going with her?
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, my neighbor... (Listens) Yeah, the brunette... (to Monica) She says you looked very pretty the other day in the green dress.
Monica: Oh stop it. Joey already told me.
Monica: What?
Monica: I thought that was a good thing.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Why do you need it?
Monica: Men are such idiots.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Rachel is singing some kind of song.]
Monica: Nooo!
Monica: Sooo?
Monica: That's it. That's my worse Thanksgiving.
Monica: The baby shower for Phoebe!
Monica: I know! I know! I am a terrible person! I mean, Chandler is never going to trust me with anything ever again!
Monica: Whoa whoa whoa! Wherere you goin?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is returning from shopping and Rachel is there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is working on a new song.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang except Chandler is there.]
MONICA: You go girl. I can't pull that off can I?
Monica: Come on guys! Lets go! Come on, its second down.
Monica: Umm, I-I really don't want to tell this story.
Monica: Hi Phoebe.
Monica: Hormones.
Monica: Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesnt make any sense.
(Joey runs off down the hall. Ross tries Monica and Rachel's apartment, but it is locked so he has to stand in the hall and pretend he wasn't listening. Chandler and his mom come out)
Monica: Look umm, of all people, you do not want me to tell this story!
Monica: Two girls and a boy?
Monica: (lying down on a mattress) Oh! Ohhhhh! Oh! Phoebe, come here. Aw, this is my new bed. You gotta feel this bad boy.
Monica: Oh my God, sit down! Sit down! How long as it been since weve seen each other?
Monica: What?!
Rachel: What?! She made the tea! (Points to Monica.)
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Rachel, get the book! The book!
Monica: The Bible?!
Monica: Yeah, theres one right under the cabinet.
Monica: How could you mess this up? It's so easy? You go into the booth, you count to five and you turn around!!
Mrs. Geller: Monica! I think Rachel's here!
Rachel: Hey... hi, ladies... uh, can I get you anything? (to Monica, quietly): Did you bring the mail?
Monica: What, he doesnt like Josh?
Monica: What did you tell them?
Monica: How do you feel?
Monica: Some moms do that.
Monica: Yeah.
Monica and Rachel: What?!
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Oh, sweetie! (They all hug.)
PHOEBE: I can see that, 'cause they both have those big brown eyes and, ya know, the little pouty chin. MONICA: And the fact that they're both monkeys.
Fat Monica: Oh, why? Why? What happened?
(Joey and Ross go into Monica and Rachel's apartment)
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Yep! You got the tickets?
Monica: Yeah, okay, give that a try!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier, Monica is telling Phoebe where everything is.]
Monica: You're from Yonkers! Your last name is Buffo-Martisis!
Ross: (looking at the coffee table where his money was) Hey umm, was-was Monica here?
Fat Monica: Yeah, yeah, and you were going him y'know, your flower.
Monica: (runs over to her) I tried to reach you at work. Theres....been a fire.
Monica: Its nice.
Monica: (To Ross) Oh, by the way. Would it be okay if I gave the toast to mom and dad this year?
Monica: Okay, just get a lot better. (pause) Fast.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are finishing up some cookies.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is trying to move off of the couch as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: See? Yeah, you told me the story. He and Monica dated when they broke up they couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stay his friend and what happened? He got phased out!
Monica: Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen! There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there? (Chandler has a disgusted look on his face.) Apparently youre not very good at it! I
Monica: (taps Phoebe on her shoulder) Um... hi there.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler walks in and starts raiding the fridge. Then Rachel comes out of the shower with a towel wrapped round her waist, drying herself with another towel. Chandler and Rachel startle each other and she drops the towel for a second and snatches the rug off the couch.]