words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
Chandler: (To Ross) Monica said wedding.
Monica: Uh, so anyway, we thought one of you could read something during the ceremony.
Monica: Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Monica: What is DOOL?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Who are they killing off?
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Monica: And the way she slaps all the time!
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch, when they start to hear a horrible screeching noise. It sounds like someone is skinning a cat.]
Monica: What is that?
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
Monica: What?
Monica: Nooo!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Monica: (interrupting) You can not play bagpipes at the wedding!!
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Monica: Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! (Points to her cheek.)
Monica: (breaks away) Oh wait, just one more thing! One more minute! (To Cecilia) Umm, youre a stupid bitch.
Cecilia: I really cant slap you. (Monica walks away angrily)
Monica: Nice to meet you! My God youre great!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
Monica and Chandler: No!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
Joey: Oh well, Chandler and Monica are over there and it's kinda hard to concentrate.
Monica: Whos David Lynn?
Monica: Theres a dude?
Monica: Did the girl ever let you ride it?
Monica: People have got to finish their stories!
Monica: Okay. (She gets up and walks over to Chandler.) Chandler? Can I see you for a second?
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Monica: I know, what about Rachel? I mean how are we even gonna ask her?
Mr. Geller: (To Monica) Why dont we take it for a spin?
Monica: Yeah. What is that?
Monica: What?!
Monica: Wow! That is a great picture!
Monica: That would be a good idea.
Monica: Okay! (They high-five and he walks out.)
Monica: You kissed another woman!
Monica and Phoebe: Oh my God!!
Monica: Yeah I am!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: Well, what were you gonna say?
Monica: Relax! Youll be fine. (Chandler exhales and turns off the table light.) Oh much better. Youre invisible now.
Rachel: (on tape) I screwed up so bad, I told Monica that I would stuff and send all these wedding invitations like weeks ago and I-I
Monica: Hey! Good luck!
MONICA: Hi, welcome home. [pulls Rachel inside] I need to borrow a hundred bucks.
Chandler: Im so pathetic! Monica knows what she wants to say! You shouldve seen her. Writing, writing, writing!
Monica: Oh no, you see were on our honeymoon. So umm, can you do your little thing and bump us up to first class?
Monica: Grab my ass!
Monica: Yknow, no point in dragging it out. Dragging out the long process of you moving out and us not living together anymore.
Monica: No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! All right, let's go Blinky! (She ushers Rachel out the door, but before the door fully closes she sticks her head back in.) Chandler!!!! (Chandler agrees to clean up the mess.)
Monica: Fine. (Starts to walk away then she runs over and grabs an orange before she exits.) Go! Go! Go!
Monica: Oh my God! Oranges!
Monica: Honey, Im going to put my hand in your pocket!
Rachel: Oh really?! Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! (Monica starts chasing Rachel around the table.)
Monica: Did you just hung up on me? (she hangs up too) All right, look, I need you at the rehearsal dinner tonight at 1800 hours.
Monica: (interrupting) Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?
Monica: All right, sweetie that's fine. You didn't do it on purpose.
Monica: Cause they took our apartment, I wanted to punish them. But Im-Im done now. Theyve suffered enough.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is about to debut Hotel Monica (formerly known as Rachels Room) to Phoebe and Rachel.]
Rachel: You mean the one that youre wearing? (Adjusts Monicas pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)
Monica: I mean think about all the money that youre gonna make!
Monica: What? (Monica sees the first couple and gasps.)
Chandler: (looks at Monica then at them) We need the stuff.
Monica: Yeah! Do that!
Rachel: Yeah! Yeah. Theyre theyre-theyre my friends, uh, Monica Stephanopolus and uh, and Chandler Acidofolus.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Monica: Well do something! Get in there!
Phoebe: Well at Monicas you can eat(Suddenly cracks up.)
Chandler: I stole Monicas and changed the name.
Monica: No, the one who looked at you once because you got in her way.
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: You were staring about eight inches south of there.
Monica: I-I-I wanna thank you all for coming. My family and my friends
Monica: I know.
Monica: Hi sweetie!
Monica: No, they were really cool. They were on their honeymoon too!
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Monica: That you can have.
Monica: Oh great! (Shows them the picture.)
Phoebe: Monica! Thats not right! Start with where.
Ross: Her date tipped me ten dollars. (Monica laughs)
Monica: Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!
Monica: Do you still wanna call em? I wanna call em.
Monica: (on phone) Uh sorry, wrong number. (Hangs up)
Monica: What?! People dont do that!
Monica: (hangs up) I dont think this numbers right!
Monica: They gave us a fake number? Why? Why would they do that?
Monica: (giggles) Of course I have! What do you think, Im some 30 year old virgin?
(Chandler and Monica both turn, take the rings from Ross and Rachel respectively, and place them on each others fingers.)
Monica: No, to get a table! Places like are always shakin you down. Everybody wants to be paid off.
Monica and Chandler: Three! (They lift up the covers and check each other out, then come back up with silly grins on their faces.)
MONICA: It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had, except for Richard.
Monica: Hey! How'd the audition go?!
Monica: Yeah, definitely.
(Chandler and Monica hug each other, and then Joey enters the apartment again.)
Monica: I know! Although, you did tell an awful lot of jokes.
Monica: What about my questions?
Monica: Okay, maybe people give out fake numbers, but they dont give out fake names.
Monica: Oh, Im sorry. Was that another joke?
Monica: Hell yeah!!!
Monica: I know.
Monica: (taking Rachels hand) Sweetie okay. Its okay. Everybody made it to the wedding. Im fine.
Monica: You used the Europe story!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
Monica: Hey how was dinner?!
Monica: Okay!
Monica: Okay!
Phoebe: Oh, so you're Monicas boss?
Phoebe: (To Monica) I didnt see this on the menu.
[Scene: Dr. Burke's office. Monica is there for her eye appointment.]
Monica: What is wrong with this freezer?! (She jabs her arm into the freezer and a piece of ice flies into her eye.) Ow! Ow!!
Joey: (to Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe) Did you hear that? I only get one extra ticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.
Monica: Well maybe Im ready now. I mean, its a little scary, but maybe its right.
Chandler: Im gonna ask Monica to marry me.
Phoebe: Ooh Monica!
Monica: Hi!
Rachel: Monica, yknow what? The only reason I did that was because your party was so boring!
Monica: I I have to fire him.
Monica: I paid to have this done.
Monica: (standing outside) Cute PJs! Youre really livin it up here in London huh?
[Scene: Doug's house, Chandler, Monica, and them are just finishing dinner.]