words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
Chandler: (To Ross) Monica said wedding.
Monica: Uh, so anyway, we thought one of you could read something during the ceremony.
Monica: Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Monica: What is DOOL?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Who are they killing off?
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Monica: And the way she slaps all the time!
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch, when they start to hear a horrible screeching noise. It sounds like someone is skinning a cat.]
Monica: What is that?
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
Monica: What?
Monica: Nooo!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Monica: (interrupting) You can not play bagpipes at the wedding!!
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Monica: Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! (Points to her cheek.)
Monica: (breaks away) Oh wait, just one more thing! One more minute! (To Cecilia) Umm, youre a stupid bitch.
Cecilia: I really cant slap you. (Monica walks away angrily)
Monica: Nice to meet you! My God youre great!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
Monica and Chandler: No!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica carries a box out of Rachels room.]
Monica: No! (They both laugh.) Oyster?
MONICA: Is your tongue swelling up?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Monica: Why are so mad at him?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone but Monica is there playing Monopoly.]
(He and Monica laugh)
Monica: Im gonna go to the bathroom, maybe Ill see you there in a bit?
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Whats the charity?
Janine: (to Monica and Rachel) Bye.
Chandler: Well, why dont you tell her to stop being silly! (Monica mocks him and he joins in.)
Monica: Oh, I like Elizabeth.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?
RICHARD: Yeah, if I have to. Monica, I don't wanna lose you, so if I have to do it all over again, then I will.
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: Well...Id better get going.
Monica: Our guys a great dancer!
Monica: Youre not supposed to look!
Monica: All right relax Mr. Ive Had Sex Four Times!
Monica: (To Chandler) Do you want our guy to be your guy?
Monica: Ooh! I'm sorry! I think, I THINK, that may have missed the table!
Monica: Oh my God! Are-are you crying?
Monica: Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn't breezy?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Monica: Does Ralph mumble when youre not paying attention?
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Monica: I blame London.
Monica: Hey! How did it go with Elizabeth?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: And slept with the professor.
Monica: Uh, would you stop it with that already?!
MONICA: Because they made me.
Monica: I cant promise anything. (She starts to dig in.)
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Monica: In 1981 you were 13!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Hey!
MONICA: DON'T...be too long with the phone.
Monica: Eldad, this is Rachel.
Chandler: There you go! There you are! (Rachel stares at Monica and Chandler)
Monica: Oop, your cake is ready!
Monica: No, Ross, we do not hate Emily. We-we just, we just think that you're having to sacrifice a whole lot to make her happy.
Monica: No! You cant do that!
Monica: Oh my God, oh my God. (on intercom) Call me on the phone!
Monica: Thats right Patrick, bye-bye!
Monica: Hes great! I mean we have such a good time together! Hes so funny, and sooo sweet, and Im not attracted to him at all!!
Rachel: (as she's being dragged) What are you? Monica!! Stop it!! Oh my God! Stop it! (Monica drags her totally onto the floor and on her back.)
Monica: Oh God! Hes gonna come by and borrow some candles for his big date!
Ross: You go get em. (to Monica) What did I do to you? Did I hurt you in some way?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, (And thats the last time for that line, no more Chandler and Joeys or Monica and Rachels, ever!) Joey and Ross are carrying the last table of Rachels. Rachel follows slowly, but is stopped by Monica.]
Phoebe: (looks at Monica) Hey, yknow what might cheer you up?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are eating Monicas dinner.]
Monica: Weeeell, it's rum, and-
Monica: Well at least, Im going to mute it.
Monica: Chandler.
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
Chandler: Gap commercial. (To Monica) So did you book them? Did you call?
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
Monica: What?
Monica: I will.
Monica: Yes.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are both getting undressed.]
Monica: No, Ill do it. You just stick to your job.
Monica: That's your call.
[Scene: Dr. Burkes office, Rachel and Monica are waiting as the doctor arrives.]
Monica: No really, they're OK.
Monica: Oh-oh, no no don't worry, I'm gonna wash it.
Monica: Well, what happened?
Monica: Was it...
Monica: Joey, take your time with that. That's my last batch.
Monica: Were supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes.
Monica: (startled) Ahh! Arent you dressed yet?
[Scene: Rachels Old Bedroom, Continued from earlier. Monica enters the room.]
Monica: What are peanut butter fingers?!
Monica: Ok, for my next song I think I�ll sing something a little more upbeat. All right? Oh, how about the PointerSisters �I am so excited�. And make it bouncy!
Phoebe: Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
Monica: Did anybody else feel they just wanted to peel the skin off their body, to have something else to do?
Phoebe: Monica, leave him alone!
Monica: (picking up the book) Chicken Soup for the Soul?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to comfort Chandler. Joey is absent.]
Monica: Oh, we used to drive each other crazy playing the shadow game.
Monica: You just put an empty carton back in the fridge!
Monica: Uhm, we just wanna give you a heads-up. Bill and Colleen hate us.
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Monica: You sold me out.
Monica: You had no right to go out with him.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Revealing her anger to point at her best friend) We both do that!
Monica: Fine!
(Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear.) Monica and Rachel: Ow! Ow! Ow!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
Monica: This is so typical. Y'know, we give, and we give, and we give. And then- we just get nothing back! And then one day, y'know, it's just, you wake up, and "See you around!" Let's go, Phoebe.
Monica: A small puff of air, now come on!
Monica: Wh?! What about my allergies?!
Monica: (laughs sarcastically) Rachel is not going to pick your stupid guy.
Chandler: (smiling cheekily) I do! Want a hint? huh? "I do" (Monica looks confused, so Chandler repeats) "I do".