words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
Chandler: (To Ross) Monica said wedding.
Monica: Uh, so anyway, we thought one of you could read something during the ceremony.
Monica: Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Monica: What is DOOL?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Who are they killing off?
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Monica: And the way she slaps all the time!
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch, when they start to hear a horrible screeching noise. It sounds like someone is skinning a cat.]
Monica: What is that?
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
Monica: What?
Monica: Nooo!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Monica: (interrupting) You can not play bagpipes at the wedding!!
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Monica: Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! (Points to her cheek.)
Monica: (breaks away) Oh wait, just one more thing! One more minute! (To Cecilia) Umm, youre a stupid bitch.
Cecilia: I really cant slap you. (Monica walks away angrily)
Monica: Nice to meet you! My God youre great!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
Monica and Chandler: No!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Janine are pretty much making out at one of the tables as Monica and Rachel look on from the couch.]
MONICA: Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.
Joey: What? No, no, no! No, no... no... no, no... No, too much is changing, okay? First, Phoebe getting married (to Phoebe) Congratulations! (pointing to Monica and Chandler)... and then these two move into a stupid house in the stupid suburbs...
[Scene: A Video Store, Monica is running in to return a video.]
Monica: Were really sorry, but um, she did ask us first.
Monica: Right.
Monica: What?
(Monica waves at Julio.)
Monica: (to clerk) Hi.
Monica: What?! Why? Why is this crazy? So this isn't the ideal way to something....
Monica: Wow! Your lip went bald. (Richard pays the clerk) Hey, thanks.
Monica: Its good to see you too.
Chandler: (following Monica) We were two miles from the house. Scared and alone. We didnt think we could make it. (He goes to put his hands on Monicas shoulders but for some reason can quite complete the action and pulls back.)
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: Me too.
Monica: No, I just I think that its too soon.
MONICA: Cause I already invited her.
MONICA: Wait a minute, who told you? [turns to Chandler who's looking sheepish] You are dead meat.
Monica: Tomorrow night.
Monica: Were not gonna have sex! Okay, nothings changed here. He still doesnt want children and I still do, so thats why were just gonna be friends.
Rachel: Monica, what are you doing?
Monica: Yeah well, I ran into Richard.
Monica: Well, I was thinking, that you gave the guys such great haircuts, I thought, maybe you'd like to do mine?
Monica: Oops.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Umm, youve got some on your pants.
Monica: No, but he told me, he thinks your a fox.
Chandler: No-o-o! (To Monica) No? (She nods no.) No-o-o! Look Joey, heres the thing, Monica and I have decided to live together, here. So, Im gonna be moving out man.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is talking to Richard on the phone.]
[Cut back to Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are entering.]
Monica: Oh.
Monica: So we can be friends who sleep together.
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, shes in bed with Richard.]
Monica: No! (pushes him) No!
Monica: Gotta keep squishing.
Chandler: With Roger? (Monica shyly looks away.) Not just with Roger?! (Monica shrugs.) Oh my God!
Monica: Well, uh yknow, our guy works with Chandler and hes really nice and smart and hes a great dresser!
Monica: Yeah. (they kiss) What d'you wanna do tonight?
[Cut to the casino, Monica is walking through it past the craps table when she notices a chip on the floor. She picks it up and heads to the table.]
(Monica starts biting on the eyedropper, spraying the fluid all over. But Rachel keeps turning her head back and forth and Monica keeps missing.)
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Yeah, right.
Monica: I love this friend thing!
Monica: What are you smiling at?
Monica: Yes! Absolutely. Okay? Look, youll know its mine because on the right cup, the lacey part, theres a very noticeable rip.
(Monica and Ross indicate that they mean right now.)
Monica: (No longer touched) you don't have insurance?
Monica: Don't you have to pee?
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! (She frantically tries to clean up the bedroom as Richard starts the tour.)
Monica: Ow!
Monica: (still hiding under the blankets) So um, who was she?
Monica: (angrily) It wasnt funny at all! Why would you do that? Why didnt you pick me?
(Someone knocks on the door; Monica gets it)
(Monica kisses him.)
Chandler: (To Monica) Turns out he is kinda funny.
MONICA: Oh it's not big, not at all, you know, kinda the same lines as, say, oh I don't know, having a third nipple.
Joey: (to Chandler and Monica) Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?
Monica, Ross, and Joey: (joining in) Home is Home Star stew.
Monica: Yeah. Im okay. Im actuallyIm a little cold, can I have your jacket?
Monica: Yeah, sure.
Monica: (Thinks a little more) Okay, Okay, (clapping her hands) All right. What if we got both houses? Huh? We can turn this house into a guest house.
Monica: (To Joey) Oh, about that. Joey, you have to change before the party.
Monica: Oh, gosh, you got some on your shirt.
Monica: Well actually, I-I didnt eat mine. Its still in the bathroom.
Monica: Wow, she must have hurt you pretty bad, huh?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Monica: Yeah, Ginger something.
Monica: What are you doing with the lamp?
Monica: I think Ill help her out. (She gets up to go over and help Rachel, and reveals she has no pants.) (to Rachel) What is going on here?
Monica: Well, what did you do?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Monica are sitting at the table as Joey enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are babysitting Ben.]
(Monica and Phoebe get up and start celebrating in the kitchen, pouring wine and singing. Rachel, shocked, goes to join them.)
Chandler: Oh, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage! Hmm, I wonder what I could get Monica thats as good as garbage?
Monica: Okay, well I do know you.
Monica: Well so?
Rachel: Oh my you think Im a pushover. Well wait, watch this, you know what? Youre not invited to lunch. What do you think of that? I think thats pretty strong, thats what I think. Come on, Monica, lets go to lunch. (She leaves)
Monica: Well, dont cha wanna?
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Monica: Well you did a little bit.
MONICA: And some of us really have to pee.
Monica: Rachel, the cute doctors are here.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross has just finished putting Ben to sleep, and is entering from Rachels room.]
Monica: (entering) Hi!
Monica: Uh-huh.
Monica: You know, if you just wait another... six and a half minutes...
JOEY: [pulls out a VCR tape] Hey Monica, what's on this video tape?
Monica: What?
Monica: Yeah, uh, it's actually not that big a deal.
VAN DAMME: [to Rachel] I'm sorry it didn't work out between you and me, [to Monica] or you and me. Drew was very disappointed.
Monica: Monica and I just crashed an embassy party.
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Monica: Ow!
MONICA: I'm sorry that I borrowed your gloves [pulls Rachel's gloves out of her purse]
Rachel: Oh, oh, and hey-hey-hey, those little spelling tips will come in handy when youre at home on Saturday nights playing Scrabble with Monica!!
Chandler: Hello Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. (He's holding the phone so that Monica can hear it as well.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Monica, and Joey are watching TV.]
Monica: I-I already told him everything! (Threateningly) You shush!!
Monica: Wed love too.