words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
Chandler: (To Ross) Monica said wedding.
Monica: Uh, so anyway, we thought one of you could read something during the ceremony.
Monica: Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Monica: What is DOOL?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Who are they killing off?
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Monica: And the way she slaps all the time!
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch, when they start to hear a horrible screeching noise. It sounds like someone is skinning a cat.]
Monica: What is that?
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
Monica: What?
Monica: Nooo!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Monica: (interrupting) You can not play bagpipes at the wedding!!
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Monica: Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! (Points to her cheek.)
Monica: (breaks away) Oh wait, just one more thing! One more minute! (To Cecilia) Umm, youre a stupid bitch.
Cecilia: I really cant slap you. (Monica walks away angrily)
Monica: Nice to meet you! My God youre great!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
Monica and Chandler: No!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
Monica: Ohh, fun!
Monica: So-so there is no party.
Monica: And you're not gonna do that.
Monica: I know. Thanks. (Chandler leaves)
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
Monica: (quietly) Hi!
Monica: We're-we're really sorry we fogged you.
Monica: Oh, can I borrow this? (points to his milk) My milks gone bad.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is opening the door.]
Monica: You are?
Monica: Okay.
[Scene: The Restaurant, Monica and Chandlers and Richard and Lisas tables have been pushed together and theyre all eating and talking.]
Monica: Oh, thanks! We'll try to stop by.
Monica: Yeah! You already got the first class tickets; you got the lounge! I mean we should get free stuff too! I mean youre not the only ones on your honeymoon!
Monica: Joey, we had a deal. That-thats why youre here! Ive got to fire you!
(Rachel wanders into the kitchen where Monica is making Chandler's dinner.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Okay, great!
(There's a knock on the door and Monica answers it.)
Monica: The fake kind!
Monica: Well it didn't!
Monica: Chandler! (Motions for him to come outside.)
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
Chandler: Monica, I want a baby too, but this woman is giving away her child. She deserves to know who it's going to. Monica: (realizes Chandler is right. She's almost crying) okay, right. (They hug)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica and Chandler are making out on one of the chairs.]
Monica: Don't get too attached, she's having it cremated.
MONICA: I don't have her number, butt-munch.
Monica: How?
Monica: What?! I mean, I didn't work this hard and-and-and lose all this weight so that I can give my flower to someone like him!
Monica: Just go over and say hi.
(Monica obeys.)
(She goes one way; he goes the other. The camera pans back to Chandler and Monica, and needless to say, they're standing there dumbstruck.)
Monica: (upon seeing Rachel she points) Oh.
Monica: Oh, relinquish is just a fancy word for lose!
Monica: Hey, Danny!
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: What do you mean?
Monica: I thought there wasn't a ball?
Joey: (still with his door wedged in the door gap, now opens his eyes wide and stares at Monica and Chandler as he did with Ross earlier in the hall) Hey listen guys, we feel really terrible.
Monica: What?! What is it?
Monica: God, I feel so guilty about Ross.
Monica: I'm sorry! It wasn't your whole toe!
Monica: Chandler, I said I was sorry.
Monica: I didn't mean to cut it off. It was an accident.
Monica: Chandler! (Follows him out.)
Monica: What?
Chandler: Look, Monica
Monica: You love me!
Monica: Yes, you did!
Monica: Honey, I dont think thats something we need to worry about! First of all hes-hes never gonna tell her how he feels about her. And even if he did you have no idea how shed react.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me. (Getting up to move further away from Rachel) li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um... there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
Monica: Yeah!
Joey: (sees Monica) Fire trucks! (Chandlers eyes double in size and he turns to Monica who doesn't understand what's happening. Then he turns back to Joey, who says "you're welcome" without a sound)
Monica: I like them a lot.
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Monica: Joey!
Monica: We are! Help us!
Monica: The woman that got married a bunch of times and killed herself when you were 13?
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Phoebe: Ross, went to get a cab so we can all... No, wh-what are you doing! No, Monica, no!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
MONICA: I wanna buy 5 shares of SGJ and I wanna buy them now. C'mon time is money my friend. Thank you. Wooo.
Monica: As a thank you, Rachel and I will kiss for one minute.
Monica: Thats very funny!
Monica: Phoebe?
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: That really means a lot. Oh, and Mom, dont bite your nails.
Monica: Umm, listen I am sorry, but Ill put some out first thing in the morning.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Ohh, Please?! Im a single mom, with a thirty year old son!!
(They start to go into Monica and Rachels, their apartment is filled with all of the old Christmas trees from Joeys work.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is reacting to the story.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: You're not gonna be phased out!
Monica: You can't fire me. I make your decisions and I say, "I'm not fired!" Ha!
MONICA: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
Monica: Ross, you were right before, it was just a stupid fight about a room.
[Scene: Monicas, Chandler and Monica are still hugging each other.]
Monica: Bye Dan!
Monica: Chris says theyre closing down the bar.
Ross: (whispering in her ear) Oh, thats right! He called to ask out Monica! That-thats gotta be embarrassing!
Monica: I know.
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: This is so great! And Im gonna be your babys aunt!
Monica: Uh, Chandler did! What does he want you to give up? Phoebe: A bunch of stuff. And the worst one... he wants me to get rid of Gladys.
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Monica: Feeling a little better sweetie?
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Monica: How do I tell Chandler that its too soon. Its gonna break his heart, hes not gonna think that I dont love him anymore.
Monica: Yeah, no, me neither.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Oh no!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Yes it's true.
Rachel: Monica, is this true?