words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
Chandler: (To Ross) Monica said wedding.
Monica: Uh, so anyway, we thought one of you could read something during the ceremony.
Monica: Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
Monica: Do you mind telling us what it is?
Monica: What is DOOL?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Who are they killing off?
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
Monica: Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
Monica: And the way she slaps all the time!
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are eating lunch, when they start to hear a horrible screeching noise. It sounds like someone is skinning a cat.]
Monica: What is that?
Monica: It sounds like its coming from across the street.
Monica: What?
Monica: Nooo!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
Monica: No, there is no way! It can not be Ross! (She looks through the window and sees Ross practicing and fumbling around with the pipes.) Unbelievable! Why is your family Scottish?!
Monica: He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean come on, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the armchair.]
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Monica: (interrupting) You can not play bagpipes at the wedding!!
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Monica: Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! (Points to her cheek.)
Monica: (breaks away) Oh wait, just one more thing! One more minute! (To Cecilia) Umm, youre a stupid bitch.
Cecilia: I really cant slap you. (Monica walks away angrily)
Monica: Nice to meet you! My God youre great!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
Monica and Chandler: No!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
(We hear the guys start to attack him, but the guy manages to calm them down and gets them to agree to what he did. Monica throws up her hands in disgust.)
Rachel: I did!! I watched! I watched! I watched Monica bang his head against that thing!
[Scene: Their Building, Monica and Rachel are going to apologize to Danny. Rachel knocks on his door, which he opens and he has this really bushy beard and long hair. Picture Paul Bunyan.]
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
MONICA: No, no, not a party. Just a surprise gathering of some people Rachel knows. Um, this is Phoebe and Chandler and Joey.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is writing a letter by the bay window as Rachel enters.]
MONICA: Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.
Joey: No, I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid! (Notices Monica standing between them and smiling.) What?! (The camera clicks, taking another picture.)
Monica: Honey, theres a reason.
Monica: No! Im not okay!
Monica: Oh, well, I bought Chandler a five hundred dollar watch and he wrote me a rap song.
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence I'd never thought I'd say.
Monica: Break!
Monica: All right, Phoebe get open. Rachel, go long.
Monica: Ow!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are eating Thanksgiving dinner.]
Monica: Let go!
Monica: No!
Monica: Let go!
Monica: And Rachel. (Chandler clears his voice loudly) And thats Chandler.
Monica: Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you (rolls her eyes) NOT. (she and Rachel giggle a little and Chandler looks unimpressed)
Monica: Let me think. Oh, when I was younger I used to dream that I got married to Mayor McCheese, and on our wedding night I ate his head.
Monica: I'm so sorry, I can't believe I did this, but I couldn't stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story.
Monica: (entering) Did I miss it? (Phoebe nods no.) Rachel, I-I want you to know that, if its positive, were gonna
Monica: (entering) Ross (who has his foot on the coffee table), foot on the floor or come over no more!
MONICA: What if they get mixed up?
[Scene: The 50's theme cafe. Monica is working the grill, the rest are at a table.]
Monica: Well, no, not at all, you're not terminal, you just, you just need some damage control.
Ross: Hey-hey, its valid okay? And Im not the only one who thinks so, Monica agrees with me.
Monica: Very bad.
Monica: Chandler!!
Monica: No.
Monica: Dont, dont, dont, dont, dont do this.
Monica: Did he just say Monica bang?
Monica: (laughs) Yknow what? I-I dont want a big, fancy wedding.
MONICA: And then he told me he would run away with me, and he didn't. [throws water in his face]
Monica: Wha... How the hell is that gonna help?
Monica: What?
Monica: Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youre yknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
Monica: Oh, is that so? Ok. If that's really what you want, then here... I give you the headset. Well, I don't really want to give you the headset. Well I guess if you're taking over, you should probably return these messages. (hands her a stack of papers with messages and calls to return)
Monica: I heard that!
Chandler: Our balcony? Seriously? That's so funny because I told Monica we should put lights on our balcony. And she said"No, no. It's too cold, nobody will go out there." And I said "Maybe if we put some light out there they will"
Monica: If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would notice that there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther! (Gunther turns to listen in.) I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
Monica: Well yknow, Im just-Im just worried that bosses will see them and think they pay you too much money. Or! Or your assistant will see them and-and want a raise!
Monica: Werent you nine?!
Monica: Christmas cookie?
Monica: (very emotional) Because... We may not be who she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby more than us.
Monica: Is this the one that I threw out last year?
(Phoebe gets up from the table, and while her back is turned, Rachel and Monica indicate via sign language that they each would have picked the other.)
[Sequence 2: Monica runs upfield and stops, waiting for a pass. Ross runs over and pulls her pants down, steps in front of her and intercepts the pass.]
Monica: Whew. Although yknow, this is part of a salt and pepper set. I mean I guess yknow it may just count as a half a present. What do you think?
Monica: (she reaches out for it and stops) Oh God! I gotta go! (runs out)
Rachel: (surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh, she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? (looks around for a spot)
Monica: It's because I'm scrappy.
Monica: Do you see this? (Mimics him drooling over a womans breasts.)
Monica: Um-mm.
Monica: Honey, whats the matter?
MONICA: You know what. Tomorrow I'm gonna do your clocks.
Monica: Ah-ah-ah, now you started this, you will finish it.
Monica: Its Joeys birthday.
Monica: Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited about getting this process started.
Monica: I know honey, Im sorry.
Monica: Okay, we'll start with the building. You guys take the first and second floor, Phoebe and I'll take third and fourth.
Monica: So, you think you'll do it on his couch?
Gunther: (to Monica and Phoebe) Hey guys.
Monica: Oh my!!
Chandler: (to Monica) Take off your shirt!
Monica: (to Chandler) Stick out your tongue.
(Cut to Ross and Monica)
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Isnt that great?
Monica: Hang on a second I just got in.
Ross: It's a big deal to me. This is great, Monica. I really appreciate this.
Monica: What is the worse part?
Monica: Thats okay.
MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
Monica: That was me.
Monica: Y'know which one was she again?
[Scene: Rachel and Monica's, Monica is watching the Civil War videos]
Monica: Oh my God!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
(Monica is sarcastically amazed.)
Monica: Yay!
Monica: Oh, that is amazing!
Monica: What?
Monica: Are you crazy?!
Monica: Then get over yourself! Grow up!
Monica: Yeah, Ive had them picked out since I was fourteen.
Monica: Is it something youd be interested in?
Chandler: Because uh we-we we split up. Monica and I split up. Hold me.
Monica: Yeah, I do know.
MONICA: OK, wait, wait, wait, wait. You know what? Ross, let's - let's switch places. You get in the middle. No un-, ya know, unless this looks like we're trying to cover something up.
Monica: So ah, Phoebe, how was your date?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her first day.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking and Rachel is getting ready for a date with Joshua.]
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Monica: Just out. Had some lunch, just me, little quality time with me. Thanks for your jacket.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica is outside the bathroom yelling at Ross who's in the bathroom.]
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Rachel enters and sneaks up to Chandler's bedroom where she overhears Chandler and Monica talking.]
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are living here and Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle when Rachel opens the door causing the door knob to hit his hand.]