words in movies
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Monica: Ok, I dont wanna be negative so Ill say that most of the signs you bought are good.
Monica: (looking at Chandler sleeping with a balloon in his mouth) So sexy. (Waking him up.) Honey.
Monica: Honey why dont you go lie down.
Monica: Phoebe did the signs!
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
Monica: Phoebe! But I could take one of those little feet and put it in a pita pocket.
Monica: Wow, hes really not letting this go, is he?
Monica: Breaks your heart doesnt it
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma continues crying while Rachel, Monica and Phoebe try different methods to stop her crying.]
Monica: Alright heres something, it says to try holding the baby close to your body and then swing her rapidly from side to side.
Monica: It worked!
Monica: Umm, she Rach, not it, she.
Monica: Oh my god, I am losing my mind.
Monica: Try feeding her again.
Monica: I know, thats why I said again!
Monica: Hey.
Chandler: Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
(Phoebe and Rachel go to the back room and Emma continues to cry in the background while Chandler and Monica talk.)
Monica: Okay whats up
Monica: Oh yeah (smiles).
Monica: What? Who says that?
Monica: Whats going on?
Monica: Excuse me?
Monica: (stands up angry) Tulsa, Oklahoma!
Monica: Chandler, I dont even wanna see the musical Oklahoma!
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Chandler: No, no, but they are going to lease us a Ford Focus. (Monicas not impressed.) Ill get out of it.
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: Oh she misunderstood, she thought she was moving to Tulsa.
Monica: About a week and a half.
Phoebe: Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so Im just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)
Monica: Rach, try holding her a different way.
Monica: Youre just new at this, itll get better, think about your first day at work. I mean, that couldnt have been easy but you figured that out.
Monica: Okay Ill take her, here. (Takes Emma)
Monica: (To Emma) Bouncy baby, Bouncy baby, Ooh baby baby, Ooh baby baby, Ooh baby baby. (Emma stops crying and falls asleep)
Monica: It worked! Ooh baby baby baby, ooh baby baby baby!
Monica: I cant believe it! Shes asleep! I got her to go to sleep! I have actual magical powers!
Phoebe: I can hear traffic and birds! I can hear the voices in my head again! (Monica looks at her strangely) Im kidding. (She smiles wickedly.)
Monica: Yes I did, Im Monica, Super Aunt
Monica: Yes I am!!
Monica: Say what?
Monica: (stands up to hand Emma back) Oh no no no no!
Monica: What?
Rachel: You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should be sleeping so (She gives Monica thumbs and goes to lay down)
Monica: Shhh! We just got her to go to sleep
Monica: No.
Monica: (loudly) What!?
Rachel: No its really okay Monica!
Monica: (comes running out the kitchen to the bedroom) Got it! Got it! Got it! Got it! Got it! Got it!
Monica: Oh no, you see were on our honeymoon. So umm, can you do your little thing and bump us up to first class?
Monica: Grab my ass!
Monica: Yknow, no point in dragging it out. Dragging out the long process of you moving out and us not living together anymore.
Monica: No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! All right, let's go Blinky! (She ushers Rachel out the door, but before the door fully closes she sticks her head back in.) Chandler!!!! (Chandler agrees to clean up the mess.)
Monica: Fine. (Starts to walk away then she runs over and grabs an orange before she exits.) Go! Go! Go!
Monica: Oh my God! Oranges!
Monica: Honey, Im going to put my hand in your pocket!
Rachel: Oh really?! Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! (Monica starts chasing Rachel around the table.)
Monica: Did you just hung up on me? (she hangs up too) All right, look, I need you at the rehearsal dinner tonight at 1800 hours.
Monica: (interrupting) Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?
Monica: All right, sweetie that's fine. You didn't do it on purpose.
Monica: Cause they took our apartment, I wanted to punish them. But Im-Im done now. Theyve suffered enough.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is about to debut Hotel Monica (formerly known as Rachels Room) to Phoebe and Rachel.]
Rachel: You mean the one that youre wearing? (Adjusts Monicas pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)
Monica: I mean think about all the money that youre gonna make!
Monica: What? (Monica sees the first couple and gasps.)
Chandler: (looks at Monica then at them) We need the stuff.
Monica: Yeah! Do that!
Rachel: Yeah! Yeah. Theyre theyre-theyre my friends, uh, Monica Stephanopolus and uh, and Chandler Acidofolus.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Monica: Well do something! Get in there!
Phoebe: Well at Monicas you can eat(Suddenly cracks up.)
Chandler: I stole Monicas and changed the name.
Monica: No, the one who looked at you once because you got in her way.
Monica: I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
Monica: You were staring about eight inches south of there.
Monica: I-I-I wanna thank you all for coming. My family and my friends
Monica: I know.
Monica: Hi sweetie!
Monica: No, they were really cool. They were on their honeymoon too!
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Monica: That you can have.
Monica: Oh great! (Shows them the picture.)
Phoebe: Monica! Thats not right! Start with where.
Ross: Her date tipped me ten dollars. (Monica laughs)
Monica: Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!
Monica: Do you still wanna call em? I wanna call em.
Monica: (on phone) Uh sorry, wrong number. (Hangs up)
Monica: What?! People dont do that!
Monica: (hangs up) I dont think this numbers right!
Monica: They gave us a fake number? Why? Why would they do that?
Monica: (giggles) Of course I have! What do you think, Im some 30 year old virgin?
(Chandler and Monica both turn, take the rings from Ross and Rachel respectively, and place them on each others fingers.)
Monica: No, to get a table! Places like are always shakin you down. Everybody wants to be paid off.
Monica and Chandler: Three! (They lift up the covers and check each other out, then come back up with silly grins on their faces.)
MONICA: It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had, except for Richard.
Monica: Hey! How'd the audition go?!
Monica: Yeah, definitely.
(Chandler and Monica hug each other, and then Joey enters the apartment again.)
Monica: I know! Although, you did tell an awful lot of jokes.
Monica: What about my questions?
Monica: Okay, maybe people give out fake numbers, but they dont give out fake names.
Monica: Oh, Im sorry. Was that another joke?
Monica: Hell yeah!!!
Monica: I know.
Monica: (taking Rachels hand) Sweetie okay. Its okay. Everybody made it to the wedding. Im fine.
Monica: You used the Europe story!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
Monica: Hey how was dinner?!
Monica: Okay!
Monica: Okay!
Phoebe: Oh, so you're Monicas boss?
Phoebe: (To Monica) I didnt see this on the menu.
[Scene: Dr. Burke's office. Monica is there for her eye appointment.]
Monica: What is wrong with this freezer?! (She jabs her arm into the freezer and a piece of ice flies into her eye.) Ow! Ow!!
Joey: (to Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe) Did you hear that? I only get one extra ticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.
Monica: Well maybe Im ready now. I mean, its a little scary, but maybe its right.
Chandler: Im gonna ask Monica to marry me.
Phoebe: Ooh Monica!
Monica: Hi!
Rachel: Monica, yknow what? The only reason I did that was because your party was so boring!
Monica: I I have to fire him.
Monica: I paid to have this done.
Monica: (standing outside) Cute PJs! Youre really livin it up here in London huh?
[Scene: Doug's house, Chandler, Monica, and them are just finishing dinner.]
(Chandler lets her into the apartment and reveals that Monica is getting a massage from another woman.)
Monica: How can that be?! Oh wait! Wait! Are you, are you serious?!
Monica: Why not?!
Monica: Okay well then, Ill fire him today and you go out with him for another week.
Monica: No! No! I shouldnt have even opened these! I mean IJoey I am out of control!! Joey, you have to do me a favor. No matter what I say, no matter what I do, please do not let me open another present! Okay?
Chandler: I dont know, Monica picked out the flowers.
Monica: What?! You said he was sweet!
Monica: Just dont pick up your phone.
Monica: What do you mean?
Monica: What? So now Im not allowed to fire him?
Monica: I wanted to do this days ago so I think I should go first.
Monica: You didnt tell anybody I was did you?!
Phoebe: (screaming) Ahhh!! Chandler and Monica!! Chandler and Monica!!
Monica: All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it, hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow ChandlerChandler is good!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there and Rachel is arranging a bouquet of flowers, pricks her finger on a thorn, throws the bouquet over her head, and those you who are quicker than some already know that Monica is the one who catches it.]
Monica: (defeated) Oh.
Rachel: (pause) And Monica, what are you going to make?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mr. Treeger has finished inspecting Monica and Chandlers apartment.]
Rachel: (to Monica) Sorry!! (to Ross) I just feel bad about all that sleep youre gonna miss wishing you were with me!
Joey: Maybe Monicas playing a joke on ya. Yknow? Getting her own husband a hooker, thats pretty funny.
Monica: Hey.
Monica: Uh well that depends, how are things with Phoebe?
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is waiting for Tim who enters.]
Phoebe: Monica!
Monica: Youre fired.