words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is looking at papers.]
Monica: I have no idea. But look how much they spent!
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: I know. It's just such reckless spending.
Monica: That's me.
Monica: Ross, you've got to do something about the humping.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, late at night Monica is still examining her bill as Rachel emerges from her room.]
Rachel: Oh, Monica. You are not still going over that thing.
Monica: This woman's living my life.
Monica: She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me! Look at this, look. She buys tickets for plays that I wanna see. She, she buys clothes from stores that I'm intimidated by the sales people. She spent three hundred dollars on art supplies.
Monica: Yeah, well I might be if I had the supplies! I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't.
Rachel: Oh, Monica, c'mon, you do cool things.
Monica: Oh really? Okay, let's compare, shall we.
Monica: Do I go horseback riding in the park? Do I take classes at the New School?
Monica: This is so unfair! She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Monica: Hi. (On the phone) Hi, uh, yes, this is Monica Geller. Um, I believe I'm taking some classes with you and I was wondering what they were.
Monica: (Hushes her) Alright, great. Thanks a lot. (Hangs up) I'm going to tap class.
Monica: This woman's got my life, I should get to see who she is.
Rachel: Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! ...Okay, Monica, y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing.
Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you, for the love of God, Monica, don't do it!! ...Thank you.
Monica: What d'you think?
Monica: Oh, no thanks, we're just here to observe.
Monica: Okay, d'y'see anybody you think could be me?
(Everyone starts to dance in unison. Monica flounders)
Monica: Okay, I'm not getting this!
Monica: Did you ever feel like sometimes you are just so unbelievably uncoordinated?
Monica: Great. It's gym class all over again.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
Woman: Hi. I'm Monica.
Monica: Oh. Monica! ...Hi. I'm Mo- ...nana.
Woman: (Fake Monica) Monana?
Monica: Yeah. It's Dutch.
Fake Monica: You're kidding! I-I spent three years in Amsterdam. (Asks her something in Dutch)
Monica: Um, Pennsylvania Dutch.
(Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel enters.)
Monica: Y'know what? After you're with this woman for like ten minutes, you forget all that. I mean, she is this astounding person, with this, with this amazing spirit.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel and Fake Monica are there.]
Fake Monica: Monana was very brave.
Monica: It was so wild. We told them we were the Gunnersens in room six fifteen. Only to find out the Boston Celtics had taken over the entire sixth floor!
Fake Monica: So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short and have breasts...
Monica: ...They threw us out! I was thrown out of a hotel! Me!
Fake Monica: Oh, by the way, tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show.
Monica: 'Scuse me?
Fake Monica: There's an open call for Cats. I'm thinking we go down there, sing Memories and make complete fools of ourselves. Whaddya say?
Monica: Nononononono. Think who you're dealing with here. I mean, I'm not like you. I-I can't even stand in front of a tap class.
Fake Monica: Well, that's just probably 'cause of your Amish background.
Monica: What?
Fake Monica: Well, you're Pennsylvania Dutch, right?
Monica: Right. Till I bought a blow dryer, then I was shunned.
Fake Monica: I-I used to be just like you. And then one day I saw a movie that changed my life. Did you ever see Dead Poets' Society?
Monica: Uh-huh.
Fake Monica: I thought that movie was so incredibly... boring. I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can't be in the play? What was that?! It's like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre. I walked out of there and I thought, 'Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back.' And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
Monica: Wow. Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, tiem lapse. Everyone but Joey and Monica are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is dusting. She comes to the table, lifts all the magazines and wipes under them, then just puts them down again. Monica bursts in, obviously drunk.]
Monica: Yo- hooo!
Monica: Monica and I just crashed an embassy party.
Monica: Noooo! (Comes closer and whispers) I'm lying. I am so drunk.
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
(Monica is drinking from the tap)
Rachel: Monica? Monica!
Monica: Water rules!
Monica: Nope. Going to the Big Apple Circus today.
Rachel: Okay Monica, what are you doing? You're gonna lose your job! This is not you!
Monica: No, it is me! Y'know, I'm not just the person who needs to fluff the pillows and pay the bills as soon as they come in! Y'know, when I'm with her, I am so much more than that. I'm- I'm Monana!
Monica: Helloooo? Yeah. Oh my God. Thanks.
Monica: They've arrested Monica.
[Scene: New York City Department of Correction, Monica is visiting Fake Monica.]
Monica: Hi.
Fake Monica: Hey.
Monica: How are you?
Fake Monica: I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did you know I was here?
Monica: Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
Fake Monica: That I was not expecting.
Monica: I want you to know, it wasn't me who turned you in.
Fake Monica: Oh. Thanks.
Monica: No, thank you! You have given me so much! I mean, if it wasn't for you, I would never have gotten to sing Memories on the stage at the Wintergarden Theater!
Fake Monica: Well, actually, you only got to sing 'Memo-'.
Monica: I just can't believe you're in here. I mean, what am I gonna do without you? Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? Who's gonna take me to the Big Apple Circus?
Fake Monica: Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of twenty-five other women, and you're worried about who's gonna take you to the Big Apple Circus?
Monica: Well, not... worried, just... wondering.
Fake Monica: There's nothing to wonder about, Monica. You're gonna go back to being exactly who you were, because that's who you are.
Monica: Not necessarily...
Fake Monica: Yes necessarily! I mean, I dunno what it is, maybe it's the Amish thing.
Monica: Um, I'm not actually Amish.
Fake Monica: Really? Then why are you like that?
[Scene: Tap Class, Monica is standing by the door.]
Monica: In. (She joins in the dancing. She still flounders)
Monica: Yeah, but at least I'm doing it!
[Scene: The Airport, everyone but Monica is there to see off Marcel.]
Monica: It's worse. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that I'm gonna be seeing you soon. I think I may even try to get out of here early.
Monica: What we did was wrong. Oh god, I just had sex with somebody that wasn't alive during the Bicentennial.
Monica: -leg?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
Monica: Well, now she has no eyebrows, mission accomplished.
(Monica closes the door and slowly walks into Rachel’s old and now empty room.)
Monica: Hey guys check it out! My mom sent me the paper!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are still out on the balcony.]
Monica: Oh my God, I went to high school with her. (to Rachel) Rachel! Hi!
Monica: I cant do it! (Ross falls into Monicas room)
Monica: I will! But not tonight. For dinner music, I thought we could listen to that tape you made me.
Monica: Come on, okay, come on this is for all womankind. Lets kill um!
Monica: Amen.
Chandler: (glaring at her) Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Were going to dinner remember?!
[Time lapse. Chandler and Joey are making the fire, Monica and Phoebe are inside. Ross enters, carrying luggage.]
MONICA: How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank.
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Monica and Phoebe: Hugh! Hugh Grant!
Monica: Come on! (The girls all run out and Joey holds up Chandler by smiling.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the next day Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there as Monica enters.]
Monica: (laughing) Oh, dont you guys look cute. You guys make such a cute couple.
Parker: No, no, no wait! Dont tell me. Let me guess. (Points as he says their names) Joey, Monica, Ross, Rachel and, Im sorry Phoebe didnt mention you. (Chandler makes a face) Chandler, Im kidding all ready youre my favorite!
Monica: Umm, okay. If its a boy its Daniel.
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
MONICA: Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.]
[Scene: Central Perk. The entire gang is there, and Chandler and Monica are handing out presents.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as enter except Joey enter.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Chandler: (entering) Hey Monica, here's your broom back.
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Monica: (to all) Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how much you all like me.
Monica: Right, you only go for them 5 minutes before they get married.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
Monica: Ugh, yknow, umm we gotta get up early and catch that plane for New York.
Monica: It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
PHOEBE: Ok. Listen, just don't say anything about me, ok. [goes over and grabs the phone that's sitting by Monica]
Monica: You know what would be real weird? Is if you werent there. Just say youll think about it, okay?
Ross: Hi. Im uh, Im Ross. I dont, I dont believe weve met. Im Monicas older brother.
Monica: Now you think I wouldn't enjoy that, because it is so fake, (Laughs) but I still do.
Monica: We're just making conversation. (Chandler makes an agreeing-sound)
MONICA: So uh, Joey and Chanlder, I, I think it's time that you take Dr. Greene over to your place.
Monica: Oh good God! If you want a baby so bad just go steal it!
(Janice turns around, Monica sees who it is.)
Monica: So umm, how was your date with Ginger?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse. Rachel is entering the living room from her bedroom as Monica enters.]
[Scene: The beach house, the next morning. Chandler and Monica are in the kitchen eating breakfast.]
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Hold on please. Joey, its your mom. (Hands him the phone.)
Monica: Yeah, apparently theyre turning it into some kinda coffee place.
Monica: Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in a half hour.
Monica: Umhmm, umhmm, about the time you told me about New Year's Eve. Where is everybody else?
Monica:: what means if he gets like a disease or kills someone. not if he gets his jollys to jaws!
Rachel: Yeah, Rachel. And this (points to Monica) is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. (looks around the room as if searching for something more interesting to do).
Rachel: Monica, what is so amazing? I gave up, like, everything. And for what?
Ross: (to Monica) So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shopping tomorrow?
Phoebe: I know, Im sorry! But yknow, this ring is better! Monica never even saw the other ring.
Monica: It's gonna be a problem, isn't it?
Monica: (Reads) Yeah, I'd say so. And there's no 'j' in 'engorged'.
CHANDLER: I'm sorry. �That's the one thing I can't do.� I promised I'd be with Monica.
[Scene: Central Perk, the same scene is continued from before the break. With Joey, Monica, Rachel, and Chandler sitting on the couch.]
Monica: Phoebe and Gary are so gonna hear about this at dinner.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment: Phoebe, Monica and Mike sitting on the couch]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is eating breakfast as Chandler enters.]
Monica: No! Rachel, you didn't find anyone so you can't tell him.
[Time lapse. Now everyone but Ross and Phoebe is back at Monica and Rachel's.]
Monica: You-you gotta take it now. Come on, do it as a present to me.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is all there.]
Monica: I cant be fair. Youre my boyfriend.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is finished telling everyone what happened.]
Monica: Well, an-anyway, I justthat night meant a lot to me, I guess Im just trying to say thanks.
Monica: (That annoying competitiveness thing kicks in again, what the heck is that with her and why must the writers show it every flippin' episode?!) Oh, we're not seeing a movie!
(they fight a little, the phone falls and Monica picks it up)
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there except for Chandler. Rachel is writing something and Monica walks up.]
Monica: It's gonna be weird to watch some actor pretending to be Ben's dad.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, morning. Someone knocks on the door and Monica gets it.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone is reading Joeys interview.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and the gang is watching Sumo wrestling on TV.]
Monica: Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing. I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing.
Rachel: Oh, ok, thank you. (Molly leaves) (to Monica) Do you see what all the guys see in her?
(Monica opens it anyways.)
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Monica are returning from their honeymoon.]
[Scene: the hotel game room. Monica and Mike are still playing ping pong]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe are telling everyone about their coma guy.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, theyre both unpacked. The big ceramic dog has found a new home in front of the window. Joey screams and runs into the living room.]
Monica: Well, the giraffes okay. And so is the pirate.
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Ross: (to Rachel) Look both, Joey and Monica feel the same way that I do. No-no-no-no.
Monica: Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. (Walks away and Chandler glares at Phoebe.)
Monica: Oh, please, that is such a lame excuse!
Monica: I wont care, because I know you will be feeling it all in here. (Points to her heart.)
Monica: No youre fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Ross! (To Rachel) See? Other people call me!
Monica: Hello, people who do not live here.
Monica: (looking at Rachels jeans) Where did you get those jeans?!
Monica: I warned you...
Monica: Sure, we have no money, go ahead.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is on the couch as Monica enters.]