words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is looking at papers.]
Monica: I have no idea. But look how much they spent!
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: I know. It's just such reckless spending.
Monica: That's me.
Monica: Ross, you've got to do something about the humping.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, late at night Monica is still examining her bill as Rachel emerges from her room.]
Rachel: Oh, Monica. You are not still going over that thing.
Monica: This woman's living my life.
Monica: She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me! Look at this, look. She buys tickets for plays that I wanna see. She, she buys clothes from stores that I'm intimidated by the sales people. She spent three hundred dollars on art supplies.
Monica: Yeah, well I might be if I had the supplies! I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't.
Rachel: Oh, Monica, c'mon, you do cool things.
Monica: Oh really? Okay, let's compare, shall we.
Monica: Do I go horseback riding in the park? Do I take classes at the New School?
Monica: This is so unfair! She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Monica: Hi. (On the phone) Hi, uh, yes, this is Monica Geller. Um, I believe I'm taking some classes with you and I was wondering what they were.
Monica: (Hushes her) Alright, great. Thanks a lot. (Hangs up) I'm going to tap class.
Monica: This woman's got my life, I should get to see who she is.
Rachel: Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! ...Okay, Monica, y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing.
Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you, for the love of God, Monica, don't do it!! ...Thank you.
Monica: What d'you think?
Monica: Oh, no thanks, we're just here to observe.
Monica: Okay, d'y'see anybody you think could be me?
(Everyone starts to dance in unison. Monica flounders)
Monica: Okay, I'm not getting this!
Monica: Did you ever feel like sometimes you are just so unbelievably uncoordinated?
Monica: Great. It's gym class all over again.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
Woman: Hi. I'm Monica.
Monica: Oh. Monica! ...Hi. I'm Mo- ...nana.
Woman: (Fake Monica) Monana?
Monica: Yeah. It's Dutch.
Fake Monica: You're kidding! I-I spent three years in Amsterdam. (Asks her something in Dutch)
Monica: Um, Pennsylvania Dutch.
(Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel enters.)
Monica: Y'know what? After you're with this woman for like ten minutes, you forget all that. I mean, she is this astounding person, with this, with this amazing spirit.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel and Fake Monica are there.]
Fake Monica: Monana was very brave.
Monica: It was so wild. We told them we were the Gunnersens in room six fifteen. Only to find out the Boston Celtics had taken over the entire sixth floor!
Fake Monica: So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short and have breasts...
Monica: ...They threw us out! I was thrown out of a hotel! Me!
Fake Monica: Oh, by the way, tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show.
Monica: 'Scuse me?
Fake Monica: There's an open call for Cats. I'm thinking we go down there, sing Memories and make complete fools of ourselves. Whaddya say?
Monica: Nononononono. Think who you're dealing with here. I mean, I'm not like you. I-I can't even stand in front of a tap class.
Fake Monica: Well, that's just probably 'cause of your Amish background.
Monica: What?
Fake Monica: Well, you're Pennsylvania Dutch, right?
Monica: Right. Till I bought a blow dryer, then I was shunned.
Fake Monica: I-I used to be just like you. And then one day I saw a movie that changed my life. Did you ever see Dead Poets' Society?
Monica: Uh-huh.
Fake Monica: I thought that movie was so incredibly... boring. I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can't be in the play? What was that?! It's like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre. I walked out of there and I thought, 'Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back.' And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
Monica: Wow. Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, tiem lapse. Everyone but Joey and Monica are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is dusting. She comes to the table, lifts all the magazines and wipes under them, then just puts them down again. Monica bursts in, obviously drunk.]
Monica: Yo- hooo!
Monica: Monica and I just crashed an embassy party.
Monica: Noooo! (Comes closer and whispers) I'm lying. I am so drunk.
Rachel: Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have been up here, I've been worried...
(Monica is drinking from the tap)
Rachel: Monica? Monica!
Monica: Water rules!
Monica: Nope. Going to the Big Apple Circus today.
Rachel: Okay Monica, what are you doing? You're gonna lose your job! This is not you!
Monica: No, it is me! Y'know, I'm not just the person who needs to fluff the pillows and pay the bills as soon as they come in! Y'know, when I'm with her, I am so much more than that. I'm- I'm Monana!
Monica: Helloooo? Yeah. Oh my God. Thanks.
Monica: They've arrested Monica.
[Scene: New York City Department of Correction, Monica is visiting Fake Monica.]
Monica: Hi.
Fake Monica: Hey.
Monica: How are you?
Fake Monica: I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did you know I was here?
Monica: Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
Fake Monica: That I was not expecting.
Monica: I want you to know, it wasn't me who turned you in.
Fake Monica: Oh. Thanks.
Monica: No, thank you! You have given me so much! I mean, if it wasn't for you, I would never have gotten to sing Memories on the stage at the Wintergarden Theater!
Fake Monica: Well, actually, you only got to sing 'Memo-'.
Monica: I just can't believe you're in here. I mean, what am I gonna do without you? Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? Who's gonna take me to the Big Apple Circus?
Fake Monica: Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of twenty-five other women, and you're worried about who's gonna take you to the Big Apple Circus?
Monica: Well, not... worried, just... wondering.
Fake Monica: There's nothing to wonder about, Monica. You're gonna go back to being exactly who you were, because that's who you are.
Monica: Not necessarily...
Fake Monica: Yes necessarily! I mean, I dunno what it is, maybe it's the Amish thing.
Monica: Um, I'm not actually Amish.
Fake Monica: Really? Then why are you like that?
[Scene: Tap Class, Monica is standing by the door.]
Monica: In. (She joins in the dancing. She still flounders)
Monica: Yeah, but at least I'm doing it!
[Scene: The Airport, everyone but Monica is there to see off Marcel.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, The girls are talking with the firemen.]
Monica: Well then who?
Monica: Did she really say that?
Monica: Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?
Monica: Ugh, I can not believe this! I mean, who is she to judge us? We could not have been nicer to her!
Monica: Well, usually when Im this anxious, I clean!
Monica: (To Chandler) Did you hear that?! They bumped them up to first class because they are on their honeymoon! Come on! Lets act like were on our honeymoon.
Chandler: (To Monica) Oh, well thank you in advance. (Kisses her.)
Monica: (To Chandler) I love her.
Chandler: (To Monica) Yknow, we havent found anybody else.
Monica: Dont you see? Its the perfect crime!
Monica: Yeah! (Laughs.)
Monica: I guess.
Joey: (To Chandler) You?! (To Monica) And-and you?!
Monica: Nice jeans!
Monica: Oh, I fell asleep.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are watching rugby on TV as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Hello.
[Cut to later in that episode. Chandler is in his bathroom with Monica, and hes panicking on how far Phoebe is pushing him.]
Monica: I was the pile of coats!
Monica: Theyre my pants!
Monica: All right. (Looking through a box.) Op, here it is! Right underneath the can of-of bug bomb. I wonder if the best place to put something that cooks food is underneath the can of poison?
Monica: I would do it but she thinks Im attracted to her!
Monica: (Looking nauseous from her parents kissing.) And Im going to go get drunk. (Gets up to get a drink.)
Monica: No! I was just getting into position and then everything went dark.
Monica: Because I put my head between her legs.
Monica: Oh, I love this street. The trees, the big front yards, the actual picket fences.
Monica: (To Chandler) This is what happens when you dont register for gifts!
Monica: I know youre planning my surprise bridal shower.
Monica: Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!
Monica: No I didnt!
[Scene: The Hallway, Monica is sitting on the step as Rachel returns.]
Monica: Sounds about right.
[Ross and Judy enter the living room. Judy and Ross sit down on the couch beside Jack. Monica and Chandler are sitting on the coffee table.]
Phoebe: Thanks. Hi, um, 'kay. I'd like to start with a song that's about a man that I recently met, who's, um, come to be very important to me. (Monica gives her a look) 'Kay. (Sung:)
Monica: Oh. (turns and looks at Joey, who gives a way-to-go thumbs up and smile.)
Monica: Oh my God! Joey, what did you do after you threw her leg on the fire?
Monica: Im sorry, they surprised me. There was nothing I could do!
Rachel: What the hell is that?!! (to Monica) What the hell is that? Is that you? (Monica nods her head no, and Rachel realizes what is making that sound.) Ohhhhhhh! (storms over to Chandler and Joeys with Monica in trail.)
(Monica gets down on one knee.)
[This starts a series of flashbacks beginning with Monica and Chandler in the waiting room in The One With the Birth.]
Monica: I think so. Se, he-he's not inviting you to his party because he likes you.
Monica: Oh, about five minutes. Right now theyre interviewing his opponent. Apparently he trains by going to Iran and pulling the arms off thieves.
Monica: Please! I feel so bad! Just watch the hot woman get naked!
Monica: Thank you. All right, now who else do you want to invite?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are now sitting in the living room.]
Monica: Thats right. Get it out of your system while were alone.
Rachel: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
Monica: Wow! Wow! And its definitely all gone? Theres nothing there to work with? (Joey glares at her.) What were you thinking?
Monica: A little tight? I could see double-oh and seven in those pants.
Ross: Oh really? Well I-I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
[Scene 13: Central Perk, the gang is gathered around Monica comforting her brother, who in a slight state of shock is cuddling a cushion for security.]
Monica: Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girls number.
(Monica runs out.)
Monica: Is that, is that what they call strippers sometimes?
Monica: My husband.
Monica: I can't believe he did this.
Monica: Why in the world would you take this tape and and why would you watch it?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross are there, Rachel is serving brownies.]
[Scene: Kleinmans, a horde of women including Rachel, Phoebe, and Monica are waiting for the store to open.]
Chandler: Monica! Wait!
Monica: What?
Monica: Yknow what? Im gonna make this up to you. I promised you a stripper (turns on the radio), and youre gonna get a stripper. (She starts to strip.)
Monica: Alright, well, this does not change anything. (to Chandler) Okay, we need to get something to grease the sides of his face.
Ross: Well, not right now. Okay look, Monica came here for some memories and damnit, were gonna give her some! Okay, grab grab some empty boxes. Okay? Well-well take stuff from mine and whatever we can pass off as hers well-well put em in their.
Monica: I think this is so great! I mean, you and Ross! D-did you have any idea?
Phoebe: (to Monica) Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, and um, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time for our alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
Phoebe: Cause youre still into Monica. So you told her there was somebody else so she would agree to work with you, so cause you figure oh if you spent a lot of time together, maybe something might happen, and...
Monica: Yeah! I didnt know there would be dancing. That was a fun surprise!
Monica: The pink one with the flowers?!
Monica: Is all this about you not being able to grow a moustache?
Monica: Well Phoebe doesnt eat turkey
Monica: Hey!
Monica: You too!
Monica: Hey, how are you feelin? Any morning sickness?
Monica: That's right, she came back all by herself.
Monica: You like Green Bay?
Monica: Is your team winning hon?
Monica: Hey!
Monica: A pie! (Will brought a pie.)
Monica: This is Phoebe.
Monica: (to Janine) Youd better hope I dont see you in the hallway!! (They exit.)
Monica: Isn't that sad? I mean, can you see how pathetic that is? You shouldn't be jealous. You should feel bad for him.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are playing foosball as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: What?
Monica: I also, did a little something in fur. But umm, thats really just for me. (Rubs it against her cheek.) Okay. So, why dont you go into your room and try these on and well seeget a better idea of whats gonna work.
Monica: Well you look incredible too! Youre justyoure so fit!
Monica: (to Will) Wanna give me a hand?
Monica: Oh umm, I meant to tell you, Ross is coming.
Monica: Good. And Rachel Green too. (Will stops suddenly.)
Monica: All right.
Monica: I cant do it. Im sorry, I wish I could, but umm, see you have these feelings for me....
Monica: Is there a problem?
Monica: (to Will) Joey.
Monica: Will! From high school.
Monica: Chandler, listen to me sweetie, I know you can do this. Okay? You have a beautiful smile.
Monica: Thats Will from high school!
Monica: Oh, so who won?
Rachel: (sees Will) Oh my God Monica, who is that?
Monica: Okay, dinners ready!