words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is showing Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe his engagement ring again.]
Monica: (entering) Hey!
(Monicas entrance makes Phoebe try to hide the ring by putting it in her mouth.)
Phoebe: (with her mouthful) Hi Monica.
(Monica goes into her room.)
(She takes it out of her mouth and hands it to him as Monica returns from her room and this time forcing Chandler to put the ring in his mouth.)
Chandler: (with his mouthful) Hi Monica.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica? Chandler?
Chandler: (glaring at her) Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Were going to dinner remember?!
Monica: Whats the big deal?
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Monica: Do you really see this as a long-term thing?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is practicing proposing.]
(Monica enters from the bedroom.)
Monica: Hi guys.
Chandler: (To Monica) You are beautiful.
Monica: Oh, thank you! (The gang exhibits signs of quiet apprehension and wears knowing glances.) (Monica giggles.) Whats going on?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are sitting at a table. Monica is checking her makeup as Chandler suddenly has a horrifying thought and starts patting down his pockets until he finds what hes looking for and sighs in relief.]
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Are you okay?
Monica: Yeah. Im okay. Im actuallyIm a little cold, can I have your jacket?
Monica: (laughs) Are you sure youre okay?
Monica: Ohh thats sweet!
(As hes talking Monica notices someone familiar has just entered the restaurant. Lets see; I seem to remember him driving a Ferrari in Hawaii solving crimes as a private investigator and as a certain eye doctor in more recent times.)
Monica: (interrupting him) Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God, Richard. (Yep, Richards back.)
Monica: Oh God, maybe he wont see us. Richard!
(Monica smiles then acts shocked. Chandler cant believe she just did that.)
Richard: (approaching them with a woman in tow) Monica! Chandler!
Monica: Hey, its good to see you!
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Monica: Chandler, wh-why dont we sit down?
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Matire'd: (motioning to the empty table next to Monica and Chandlers) Or if you prefer, this table is available.
[Scene: The Restaurant, Monica and Chandlers and Richard and Lisas tables have been pushed together and theyre all eating and talking.]
Monica: And so, were hiding in the bathroom.
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
Monica: So I hide in the shower and the next thing you know theyre going at it right on the bathroom floor.
Monica: Ohh.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Chandler are returning to find Ross is there waiting for them.]
Monica: I thought you were going out with Elizabeth.
Monica: Oh Ross, sometimes grown-ups have commitments they just cant get out of!
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
Monica: Shes leaving for three months.
Monica: Look Ross, the only question you need to ask is, "Do you see a future?" I mean like do you see yourself marrying her? (Ross pauses in consideration.) Oh my God! You did it already! You married her, didnt you?!
Monica: Okay well I think thats your answer.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is taking out the garbage as Phoebe and Joey enter. Phoebe gasps.]
Monica: Why do you want to see my hand?
Monica: (suspiciously) Okay. (Exits to carry out Phoebes wishes.)
Monica: (entering) I had to go all the way to the basement because some idiot keeps stuffing the trash chute with pizza boxes!
Rachel: (entering) Hey! (Sees Monica, gasps, and runs over to her.) Oh my God youre here, let me see your hand!!
Monica: (entering) Hi guys!
Monica: What are you up too?
Monica: Well thats a little crazy. Although I am yknow glad to hear that youre branching out on what you look at on the Internet.
Monica: Why?! To celebrate your relationship! To solidify your commitment! To declare your love for one another to the world!
Monica: Okay well thats good to know.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurants kitchen, shes cooking as a waitress sticks her head in.]
Waitress: Hey Monica, theres a customer who wants to complement the chef, should I let him in?
Monica: Sure, I love this part! (Starts to look busy.)
Monica: Richard!
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Monica: Oh, good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant, continued from earlier.]
Monica: What uhWhat did youWhat?!
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Monica: Oh God (Starts looking around.) Why dont they put chairs back here?!
Monica: What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three years ago?!
Monica: What were you doing in Africa?
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Monica: Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, in fact, Im the one thats making him wait!
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: Why? Because of the government.
Rachel: Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
[Scene: A Pizza Joint, Chandler and Monica are eating lunch.]
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Monica: Yeah, but thats pigs not people!
Monica: Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
Monica: Oh my God! Then-then-then what are we even doing?! What is this?!
Monica: Yknow what?! I gotta go! Ugh!
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey, still looking like Captain Stubing, is practicing his slipknots as Monica enters.]
Joey: Hey Monica!
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Monica: Yeah, its great.
Monica: Im just having one of those days where you realize youre in a dead-end relationship!
Monica: Its not like I want to get married tomorrow! Its just that I-Id like to believe that Im in a relationship thats actually going somewhere, that Im not just wasting my time!
Monica: No I dont know Chandler! Not anymore! Its like its like somethings changed.
Monica: I didnt change!
Monica: What?!
Monica: Is that some kind of boat talk?
Monica: What does he think? Does he think Im just gonna wait around for nothing?
Joey: Monica face it, Chandler is against marriage. And-and always will be!
Monica: (starts for the door) Well theres some people who do want to marry me.
Monica: Yeah! Richard!
Joey: R-R-Richard said he wants to marry you?! (Monica nods yes.) And-and Chandlers tellin ya how much he hates marriage?!
Monica: Thats right.
Monica: You just told me that he hates marriage! That-that hes a-a complex fellow whos unlikely to take a wife! That-that hes against marriage and always will be!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is entering to find Joey, still looking like Captain Stubing, on the phone.]
Joey: Richard told Monica he wants to marry her!
Joey: Look, Chandler I dont think us getting our asses kicked is a solution. Okay? Just go and find Monica!
Monica: Hi.
Monica: I dont know why Im here.
Monica: I dont know.
Monica: (entering) Chandler is such an idiot!
Monica: Yeah, Ill have a scotch
Monica: (moving over to the couch) Still smoking cigars?
Monica: No thats, thats okay.
Richard: So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up do you ever, think about me?
Monica: Uh yeah, I-I actually I thought about you a couple months ago.
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Monica: Edward Nevski?
Monica: No.
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
[Scene: Richards Apartment, Monica is looking around and notices an African mask hanging on the wall.]
Monica: (to the mask) I missed you-you ugly, flat faced old freak!
Monica: Oh! (Laughs and points at the mask.) Him.
Monica: I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment! Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Monica: Nothing. (She backs away a little bit but is still in his arms and looks up at his eyes.) I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
Monica: Yknow, I-I I have to figure some stYknow, some stuff before I can
Richard: Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want. (Pause) Ten, even twenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. (Monica leaves.)
Chandler: (examining the coffee table) Scotch on the rocks, with a twist, on a coaster? Ha-ha, Monica! Monica!
Chandler: I cant talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
(He walks dejectedly into his apartment to find it lit with about a thousand candles and Monica standing in the living room.)
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
(Monica gets down on one knee.)
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
Monica: Yes.
Monica: I knew you were likely to take a wife!
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Monica: Oh
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Monica: You had a bathroom break at 2030. Pee on your own time, Mike! (to Phoebe and Mike). Now, in regard to the toast, okay, you wanna keep them short, nothing kills a rehearsal dinner like long speeches. Okay. You just get in, do your thing and get out!
Monica: Umm, I think I spoke too quickly. There-theres a learning curve with this job and maybe we can try it again.
Monica: (on phone) Hey listen umm, how would you like to get together? Say next Saturday? (Listens) Okay, how about Sunday? (Listens) Okay umm, the week after that? (Listens) The week after that? (Listens) Yknow what Greg? Yknow what? We are good, interesting, funny people with good questions and if you and your precious Jenny cant see that then (Listens) January 15th? (Chandler dances.) Well see you then! (Listens) Okay!
Monica: This place is really my Grandmothers. (Joey starts to take off all of his clothes, while Monica gets the glasses and pours the lemonade.) I got it from her when she moved to Florida, otherwise I could never afford a place like this. So if the landlord ever asks, Im 87 year old woman, whos afraid of her VCR. So are you thirsty?
(chez Monica and Rachel)
(They both get up and Monica expects Joey to take the lead, but he doesnt, and they fumble around for a little bit.)
Monica: Because, honey, I mean this in the sweetest way possible, nobody is gonna wanna watch that.
Monica: It's my New Year's resolution!
Monica: Damn it! Rookie mistake!
[cut to a new scene, also in Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting, Phoebe is nearby.]
(Monica and Chandler do not look amused by Joeys head in the door)
Monica: Good! Now, take those salads to table 4, (to the kitchen worker from earlier) And you! Get the swordfish! (to another assistant chef) And you! Get a haircut!
Monica: Oh that's cute! We really all enjoyed it. But y'know, it doesn't count.
(She gets to Monica who has the dress balled up in one hand and is sitting on Megan who is sprawled out on the floor.)
MONICA: And I would have to say pah-huh.
Monica: Look at it! Ohhh! Wallpapers a little faded, thats okay. Carpets a little loose. Hardwood floors!!
(Monica closes the door, Chandler knocks, and Monica opens it to reveal Chandler on his knees.)
Chandler: I don't see it that way. Okay? Because, I see two Monicas, the one that was my friend, who lived across the hall, and wanted to have a lot of babies and then the new Monica, who I just started to date. Now, who's to say what she wants?! Im right. I'm right. Am I right?
Phoebe: And Tim I just wanna say, good luck here. (Shakes his hand and leaves, which disgusts Monica.)
Chandler: What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont (shows them a brochure)!
Monica: Rach! We werent gonna miss our friends getting married!
Chandler: Oh, its not just that, I would be Englands most powerful weapon. Jet setting heartbreaker on her majestys secret service. A man who fears no one; with a license to kill. (Worried.) Would Monica let me wear this?
Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens, (Rachel and Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens... La la la la...something and noodles with string. These are a few...
Monica: Joey's bare ass!
Monica: Okay, I think thats it. The seating chart is done. This is our wedding. They all look like theyre having fun dont they?
Fat Monica: I know, but y'know, this time you're gonna definitely know whether or not you did it!
(They run to the living room where Monica has moved the chair back (Towards the step), the coffee table forward (Towards the TV), and taped a square outline on the floor.)
Monica: No, no! We should divide them up (picks up the bowl) and I should get extra because we used my card to buy them!
Monica: Yeah and-and Im sorry too. But, well I justI like things done a certain way and the chemistrys just not right.
Monica: (To Chandler) We're not really gonna buy these people steak dinners are we?
Monica: Oh really, you want to talk about quality? Have you heard of a key? It's what some people sing in.
(And he starts licking the grease which trickles down his face. Monica also squirts some on the other side of his face, and his tongue follows her movements.)
(She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there.)
(He goes out into the hall and finds a very drunk Monica lying up against Joey and Rachels door.)
Monica: Oh, you know, my flock is good, I mean, yeah, my flock pretty much takes care of themselves at this point. Good flock. Flock, flock, flock.
Monica: The basket is totally empty! My God, the neighbors ate all the candy!
Monica: (points at the baby she's holding) This is a boy, (points at the baby Chandler is holding) and that's a girl.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is paying Phoebe.]
[Scene: The delivery room at the hospital. Monica, Chandler and Erica are there. Erica is in labor, and she is breathing heavily.]
[Scene: Bill and Colleen's apartment. Chandler comes running into the living room. Monica is the only one there.]
Ross: Hey, yknow what nickname never caught on? The Ross-A-Tron! (Monica shakes her head in disgust.)
Monica: She doesn't have a stomach ache, she's in labor.
Monica: Okay, if you need the vacuum, its in my closet on the left-hand side. Ah, the garbage bags are next to the refrigerator
Monica: Are you kidding?! I practically spent my entire childhood at the arcade! This is likeOh my, this is like my second favorite game!
Fake Monica: Well, that's just probably 'cause of your Amish background.
Monica: I just ran into Dave and he told me that you blew him off! I mean, you listen to me! Now, I'm calling the shots! I say you leave Ross alone and go get Dave! What the hell were you trying to do?
Monica: I mean, why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a guy home, and within five minutes they're all over him. I mean, they're like- coyotes, picking off the weak members of the herd.
Monica: Of course we will, come on we gotta make dinner.
Fake Monica: You're kidding! I-I spent three years in Amsterdam. (Asks her something in Dutch)
(Both Rachel and Monica walk into their bedrooms, stop, and come back into the living room with confused looks on their faces.)
Monica: (hands Chandler a bag) Chandler, here you go, got your traditional Thanksgiving feast, you got your tomato soup, your grilled cheese fixin's, and your family size bag of Funyuns.
Monica: She stole my jeans!
[Scene: house next to the one the Bings are moving into. Chandler and Monica knock, a lady opens the door.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Obsessive Monica has finished opening all the presents. Shes ashamed of this, at least, because as someone enters ]
[Scene: Another Hospital Room, Chandler and Monica enter and start making out.]
Monica: We know how tough those parent/teacher conferences can be.
Monica: (really excited) Mmh... this cake is amazing!
Monica and Phoebe: Ahhh!!
Monica: All right Rach, for what its worth, I think that youre doing great. I mean yknow lets face it, no one handles this well.
Monica: (to the waitress) When you get a sec, another round of daiquiris.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. They're in the kitchen as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Ooh, candy bars, crossword puzzles
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Monica has completely destroyed the foosball-table, and Chandler and Joey are holding the birds.]
Monica: (hands the tape back to Joey, but doesnt let him grab it) Yknow maybe a little bit!
Monica: No, but I will leave a sweater that smells like me right next to you!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
Monica: Oh my god, where's my purse? No, you know what? I can replace everything in there. Get that binder, and let's go!
Monica: Yes, I want to change. And why-why dont you go down and get us a table?
Monica: Okay. (They walk away to get some privacy.) We have got to beat them! {Here we go yet again.}
Monica: Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
Monica: Well, tonight, I actually went out with Chip Matthews in high school.
(Monica, Phoebe and Joey release their wind-up toys.)
MONICA: They'r alright.
MONICA: Nooo! Never! I mean, we're living in the moment. God, it is so nice for once to not have to get all hung up on 'Where is this going?'
Phoebe: Well, because we thought you knew!! Its so obvious! God, that would be like telling Monica, "Hey, you like things clean."
Monica: (to Joey) He is so cute. (to Angela and Bob) So, where did you guys grow up?
Monica: Watch the thorns!
(Chandler stares at the doctor, completely shocked. Monica just freezes and turns around slowly.)
Monica: The wedding is off, sloppy and immature!
MRS. GELLER: Well, I was thinking, why doesn't he give Monica a call?
Monica: Honey, Im not returning them. Okay? I mean I-I know they cost a lot, but Im going to wear them all the time. Youll see. Besides, I love the compliments. I mean, have you ever had something so beautiful everyone wanted it?
Monica: I gave you one job! (Starts to examin the lasagne through the bottom of the glass pan.)
Monica: I cant leave it! You gouged a hole in my dingy floor.
Monica: (To Chandler) How great are you, you little saver?! I mean, the-the amount you have is exactly the budget of my dream wedding!
Monica: Okay, how about the fact that he's engaged to another woman, who just happens to be your ex-best friend?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Monica is throwing a party. Joey is talking to Ross about the bad audition he just had while pouring booze onto a snow cone.]
Monica: Okay listen, yknow when you move in Rachels room is gonna be empty, you wanna talk about what we want to do with it?
Monica: Relax, she-she's gonna give in way before you do!
Monica: (elbows him) Fifteen minutes.
Monica: Oh (realizes her pants are undone and zips them up)!
Monica: Do you hear something? (Chandlers stands up and goes to the door to look out from the peephole)
Monica: Hey, Rach! I made a pile of your stuff over on this side of the room. If you could just (Rachel grunts and throws her purse at it) throw your purses at it.
Ross: Fine! Its your life! (Starts to storm out mad about his failed attempt at the manipulation of his best friend and sister, but stops and tries one last time.) I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if you move in together, (Monica and Chandler just stare at him.) but thats what you want, theres nothing I can do. (Opens the door and tries one more time.) DONT DO IT!!!!! (Finally leaves.)
Monica: Sure! It doesn't mean anything! Just like I know it doesn't mean anything with you!
Monica: (to the restuarant customers) Excuse me, excuse me, hi, I'm Monica Geller..I'm the head chef here.. (pauses as if waiting for something).. Ok, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever! Ok, quick question: by a show of hands, how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside? (a few people raise their hands)
Monica: Eh... Heart Disease, Alzheimers, gout?
Monica: (starts smiling) I am scrappy.
Monica: Hi. (On the phone) Hi, uh, yes, this is Monica Geller. Um, I believe I'm taking some classes with you and I was wondering what they were.
Monica: I know what you need, you need a bodyguard. Hey Ross, what is Ben doing after preschool?
[Sequence 1: Monica throws the ball over Chandlers head to Joey who catches it for a touchdown, and starts to dance in celebration. Chandler then tackles him, and he starts to dance in celebration.]