words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is showing Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe his engagement ring again.]
Monica: (entering) Hey!
(Monicas entrance makes Phoebe try to hide the ring by putting it in her mouth.)
Phoebe: (with her mouthful) Hi Monica.
(Monica goes into her room.)
(She takes it out of her mouth and hands it to him as Monica returns from her room and this time forcing Chandler to put the ring in his mouth.)
Chandler: (with his mouthful) Hi Monica.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica? Chandler?
Chandler: (glaring at her) Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Were going to dinner remember?!
Monica: Whats the big deal?
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Monica: Do you really see this as a long-term thing?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is practicing proposing.]
(Monica enters from the bedroom.)
Monica: Hi guys.
Chandler: (To Monica) You are beautiful.
Monica: Oh, thank you! (The gang exhibits signs of quiet apprehension and wears knowing glances.) (Monica giggles.) Whats going on?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are sitting at a table. Monica is checking her makeup as Chandler suddenly has a horrifying thought and starts patting down his pockets until he finds what hes looking for and sighs in relief.]
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Are you okay?
Monica: Yeah. Im okay. Im actuallyIm a little cold, can I have your jacket?
Monica: (laughs) Are you sure youre okay?
Monica: Ohh thats sweet!
(As hes talking Monica notices someone familiar has just entered the restaurant. Lets see; I seem to remember him driving a Ferrari in Hawaii solving crimes as a private investigator and as a certain eye doctor in more recent times.)
Monica: (interrupting him) Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God, Richard. (Yep, Richards back.)
Monica: Oh God, maybe he wont see us. Richard!
(Monica smiles then acts shocked. Chandler cant believe she just did that.)
Richard: (approaching them with a woman in tow) Monica! Chandler!
Monica: Hey, its good to see you!
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Richard: Oh, Im sorry. (Introduces them.) Lisa, (nodding at each) Monica, Chandler. We used to date.
Monica: Chandler, wh-why dont we sit down?
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Matire'd: (motioning to the empty table next to Monica and Chandlers) Or if you prefer, this table is available.
[Scene: The Restaurant, Monica and Chandlers and Richard and Lisas tables have been pushed together and theyre all eating and talking.]
Monica: And so, were hiding in the bathroom.
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
Monica: So I hide in the shower and the next thing you know theyre going at it right on the bathroom floor.
Monica: Ohh.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Chandler are returning to find Ross is there waiting for them.]
Monica: I thought you were going out with Elizabeth.
Monica: Oh Ross, sometimes grown-ups have commitments they just cant get out of!
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
Monica: Shes leaving for three months.
Monica: Look Ross, the only question you need to ask is, "Do you see a future?" I mean like do you see yourself marrying her? (Ross pauses in consideration.) Oh my God! You did it already! You married her, didnt you?!
Monica: Okay well I think thats your answer.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is taking out the garbage as Phoebe and Joey enter. Phoebe gasps.]
Monica: Why do you want to see my hand?
Monica: (suspiciously) Okay. (Exits to carry out Phoebes wishes.)
Monica: (entering) I had to go all the way to the basement because some idiot keeps stuffing the trash chute with pizza boxes!
Rachel: (entering) Hey! (Sees Monica, gasps, and runs over to her.) Oh my God youre here, let me see your hand!!
Monica: (entering) Hi guys!
Monica: What are you up too?
Monica: Well thats a little crazy. Although I am yknow glad to hear that youre branching out on what you look at on the Internet.
Monica: Why?! To celebrate your relationship! To solidify your commitment! To declare your love for one another to the world!
Monica: Okay well thats good to know.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurants kitchen, shes cooking as a waitress sticks her head in.]
Waitress: Hey Monica, theres a customer who wants to complement the chef, should I let him in?
Monica: Sure, I love this part! (Starts to look busy.)
Monica: Richard!
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Monica: Oh, good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant, continued from earlier.]
Monica: What uhWhat did youWhat?!
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Monica: Oh God (Starts looking around.) Why dont they put chairs back here?!
Monica: What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three years ago?!
Monica: What were you doing in Africa?
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Monica: Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, in fact, Im the one thats making him wait!
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: Why? Because of the government.
Rachel: Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
[Scene: A Pizza Joint, Chandler and Monica are eating lunch.]
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Monica: Yeah, but thats pigs not people!
Monica: Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
Monica: Oh my God! Then-then-then what are we even doing?! What is this?!
Monica: Yknow what?! I gotta go! Ugh!
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey, still looking like Captain Stubing, is practicing his slipknots as Monica enters.]
Joey: Hey Monica!
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Monica: Yeah, its great.
Monica: Im just having one of those days where you realize youre in a dead-end relationship!
Monica: Its not like I want to get married tomorrow! Its just that I-Id like to believe that Im in a relationship thats actually going somewhere, that Im not just wasting my time!
Monica: No I dont know Chandler! Not anymore! Its like its like somethings changed.
Monica: I didnt change!
Monica: What?!
Monica: Is that some kind of boat talk?
Monica: What does he think? Does he think Im just gonna wait around for nothing?
Joey: Monica face it, Chandler is against marriage. And-and always will be!
Monica: (starts for the door) Well theres some people who do want to marry me.
Monica: Yeah! Richard!
Joey: R-R-Richard said he wants to marry you?! (Monica nods yes.) And-and Chandlers tellin ya how much he hates marriage?!
Monica: Thats right.
Monica: You just told me that he hates marriage! That-that hes a-a complex fellow whos unlikely to take a wife! That-that hes against marriage and always will be!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is entering to find Joey, still looking like Captain Stubing, on the phone.]
Joey: Richard told Monica he wants to marry her!
Joey: Look, Chandler I dont think us getting our asses kicked is a solution. Okay? Just go and find Monica!
Monica: Hi.
Monica: I dont know why Im here.
Monica: I dont know.
Monica: (entering) Chandler is such an idiot!
Monica: Yeah, Ill have a scotch
Monica: (moving over to the couch) Still smoking cigars?
Monica: No thats, thats okay.
Richard: So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up do you ever, think about me?
Monica: Uh yeah, I-I actually I thought about you a couple months ago.
Monica: Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my new eye doctor.
Monica: Edward Nevski?
Monica: No.
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
[Scene: Richards Apartment, Monica is looking around and notices an African mask hanging on the wall.]
Monica: (to the mask) I missed you-you ugly, flat faced old freak!
Monica: Oh! (Laughs and points at the mask.) Him.
Monica: I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment! Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Monica: Nothing. (She backs away a little bit but is still in his arms and looks up at his eyes.) I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
Monica: Yknow, I-I I have to figure some stYknow, some stuff before I can
Richard: Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want. (Pause) Ten, even twenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. (Monica leaves.)
Chandler: (examining the coffee table) Scotch on the rocks, with a twist, on a coaster? Ha-ha, Monica! Monica!
Chandler: I cant talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
(He walks dejectedly into his apartment to find it lit with about a thousand candles and Monica standing in the living room.)
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
(Monica gets down on one knee.)
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
Monica: Yes.
Monica: I knew you were likely to take a wife!
Monica: Come in! Come in! (Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe burst through the door.) Were engaged!!!
Monica: Oh
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Monica: Alright, lets say that it is him, would we not want the baby? No! Would we treat him any differently?
Rachel: Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are relaxing in sexual bliss.]
(Nana passes for the second time and the nurse pulls the blanket over her. Ross and Monica go to tell the family)
Will: Sure! Monica, I cant get over how great you look! You look stunning!
[Scene: Las Vegas, we have the typical glamour shots of Vegas, the Strip, slot machines, a couple other gaming tables all set to the tune of you guessed it, Money. Anyhoo, we finally get through that and watch Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe enter Caesar's Palace carrying their luggage.]
Monica: Wow! Youre a lot sturdier that Chandler. He crumpled like a piece of paper. So how was youre trip?
Monica: Well, we... (makes quotation signs in the air) "bore false witness"... See I could be a reverend.
[Scene: The Bings�. Monica in bathrobe, merely covered. Someone�s knocking at the door.]
Monica: (entering with Rachel) All right boys, last chance for the tickets!
Phoebe: Oh, well, it doesnt have a nameoh, okay, Phoebeball! No, it doesnt have a name. Umm, okay, Monica, what is your favourite thing about trees?
Monica: They've only been going out for a few weeks and Phoebe is completely hung up on Mike! She'll say "No", David's heart will be broken, it will be too hard for them to recover from and then Phoebe will end up alone again.
MONICA: Rachel, it's a world where Joey is a neuro-surgeon.
Monica: I might've said that. (Chandler laughs.) Why is that funny?
Monica: I gotta make up the guest bedroom. (To Ross) Hey, Cousin Cassie is coming to stay with us a few days.
Monica: (into phone) Pants and a sweater? Why, mom? Who am I gonna meet in a blackout? Power company guys? Eligible looters? Could we talk about this later? OK. (hangs up)
Monica: Oh, when you get over this breakup we need to go shopping.
Chandler: Oh, yes. Well its very beautiful. Its cream-colored and tight [Realizes what he just said and looks worried. Monica and Ross also looked shocked. Judy and Jack give Chandler a very dirty look.] I dont mean tight, I mean its not too tight, not that I was looking at-[giving up all hope, he puts his head into his hands.]
Monica: Well, I guess we should go back in. When you gave me another chance, I guess we should do the same for Amanda.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, the next day. Phoebe is busy making a sandwich.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting in their recliners watching TV. Monica, Ross, and Phoebe are there.]
Monica: Look, I'm not happy about this either, but y'know if-if Ross says he's happy then we're just gonna have to keep our feelings about Emily to ourselves. Are you cool with that?
Monica: Why? (She hops into the living room and imitates Chandler's happy dance.)
MONICA: There's no man in here.� How dare you accuse me of that.� (She slaps Chandler.)
Monica: (entering, to Joey and Rachel) Hey, did you guys know, that your oven doesn't work?
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
Monica: Hey! Umm, I think Brenda needs a raise.
Monica: It's my new perfume. Why don't you come closer where you can really appreciate it?
Monica: Honey, thanks for trying to figure out a way, but if you're going to Tulsa, I wanna go with you.
Monica: Yeah, I mean yeah, I look great. Yeah, I feel great and yeah, my heart is not in trouble anymore! Blah, blah, blah! Y'know I still don't feel like I got him back, y'know? I just want to humiliate him. I wanna, I want him to be like naked and then I'm going to point at him and laugh!
Monica: How many fingers am I holding up? (She's not holding any up.)
Chandler: Because its flattering! (Shivers harder) Come on Monica! Come on Monica! (He goes inside.)
Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. Thats what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tiered wedding cake (Starting to cry), with the little people on top. (Ross gets thrown a box of Kleenex from the bathroom and he gives her one.) Thanks. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
(She gives Monica a big binder that's perfectly in order.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Ross are both pouting and sitting on the couch.]
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
Chandler: Now, that's a lot harder than it sounds. You always forget at least one, or in some cases... fourteen (looks over to Monica).
Rachel: No Monica! Im serious! Oh, maybe I should just forget about it. Become a lesbian or something.
Monica: Honey, that's okay. I actually know this woman, Nancy, who's a restaurant biz head-hunter. Maybe she'll know of something.
[Scene: Another street, somewhere along the River Themes, Ross, Emily, and Monica are walking to where theyre gonna get married. Emily is relating the troubles with the caterer.]
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
[Cut to Living Room, Rachel is sleeping on the couch, Ross is gone, the rest of them can finally emerge from their cell. They all wave good bye, and start to walk quietly out, as Monica goes and puts a blanket on Rachel. Joey starts walking all hunched over and bobbing his shoulders as he goes.]
Monica: A jazz trio for cocktails. The Bay City Rollers for dancing. Wait, that was from my sixth grade wedding.
Phoebe: Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word. (Chandler and Monica look surprised) Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh, "Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm not hanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!" Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves! (She starts to walk out) In this world history teaches us nothing! (Exits)
Monica: Hey Maureen! (They hug.) Gosh! Hey uh, Chandler? This is my cousin Maureen.
[cut to later, Tim has left. Monica is still shivering. Theres a knock on the door.]
Monica: Sure. Oh, um, Chandler? Y'know, the-the old Monica would-would remind you to scrub that Teflon pan with a plastic brush...But I'm not gonna do that.
Monica: I mean, was it Gina?
Monica: So Nancy told me about this job at this great restaurant, Javo (sp?). It's just a little outside of Tulsa.
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
Monica: You dont? (Laughs) Well, thats the difference between a professional and a layman.
MONICA: Yes. I hated you. I mean I, I, loved you in a 'you're my brother so I have to' kind of way, but basically, yeah, I hated your guts.
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
(No one can and Monica looks at Joey expectantly.)
Monica: Yeah, a-a-and clean. Not just health department clean... Monica clean.
Monica: Umm, I'd love too! (She goes over and picks up the box and decides to follow Rachel's advice and holds the box up to her cheek.) Ooh, I love macaroni and cheese. I love-I love the way this box feels against my cheek.
Monica: That is so sweet! (She kisses him and turns to add some sugar to her tea.)
Ross: That bitch! (He gets up and they go over to ambush Frannie. Monica taps on Frannies shoulder.)
Monica: Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance!
Monica: You gave her food poisoning!?
[Scene: A street, Chip is walking Monica to his motorcycle.]
Monica: (Entering from her bedroom, talking on the phone) Yeah, once again, I am sorry. Thank you. Bye. (To the gang) I just had to turn down a job catering a funeral for sixty people.
Ross: No, Monicas restaurant got a horrible review in the Post. (They all gasp.) I didnt want her to see it, so I ran around the neighborhood and bought all the copies I could find. (He hands the paper to Phoebe and they all read it.)
Monica: And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive. (To Rachel) (Starts to cry) You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! (They both break down in tears.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there with her boyfriend Roger, talking to Rachel and Monica.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is getting ready for a date with Monica as Ross enters.]
MONICA: I've been great, just great. How have you been? [tilting her head]
Monica: What happened? You still have the Monica wedding fund dont you?
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Phoebe: All right, prude... Look, Monica and Chandler really love this house. You are not gonna talk them into staying here.
Monica: Believe me, Chandler and I have not seen each other in over a week. We�ll probably be the first ones there.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone. Rachel walks in and overhears the conversation.]
Chandler: Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.
MONICA: [Opens the door] I need to borrow a hundred bucks.
Monica: I know...God. I haven't seen my savings take a hit like this since I was a kid and they came up with double-stuffed Oreos. What happened to all our money?
Erica: Yeah. It's a sonogram they took of the baby last week. I thought you might want to see it. (gives it to Monica, who looks at it for a long time, and then shows it to Chandler)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is pouring Mark some coffee.]
Rachel: Thats right, still no baby! (To Monica, Joey, and Chandler on the couch) Come on people! Please make some room!
Monica: You know, that guy she met at the coffeehouse.
Monica: Well, if it annoys you so much, then why do you do it?
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... (stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica) Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Monica: Huh. Whats doofus spelled backwards?
Monica: Guys, rules are good! Rules help control the fun! (They all leave and close the door on Monica.) Ohhh! (Throws her notepad down in disgust.)
Monica: Actually there is. Chandler usually helps me with this, but hes really into the game so I dont want to bother him. Could you help me fold these napkins? (Hands her a stack of them.)
Monica: I can't believe my parents are actually pressuring me to find one of you people.
Monica: Pleased to meet you. So you're coming to Rachel's party tonight?
Monica: OK, we done with the chit-chat? Are we ready to play some serious poker?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is recovering from her false labour.]
(they sit down and Roy plays "You Make Me Feel" by Sylvester on his boom box, and starts... With his back towards the girls, he starts waving his hands, then backs towards the girls slapping his butt, then swings it around, and makes thrusting pelvic movements in front of Phoebe. He dances around the tables in between all the girls, and gets back into the kitchen part of the room. He then tears off one of his sleeves and throws it towards Monica and Rachel, who fight over who gets it. He then tears off his other sleeve and moves it back and forth between his legs, getting closer to Phoebe.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Monica and Chandler are sitting on one of the chairs doing a crossword puzzle.]
(Monica plays those words back in her mind and then smiles and runs to Chandler, who is twisting with joy. They hug.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler walks in, wearing a suit.]
(Monica gets behind him and in combination with his sliding the chair forward and her pushing with her leg manages to get up to the table.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are preparing to leave for the funeral.]
CHANDLER: I don't know, Richard's really nice and everything, uh, it's just that we don't know him really well, ya know, and plus he's, ya know, old [Monica gives him a glare] -er than some people, but, uh, younger than some buildings.
(Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.)
Monica: Like a pirate?!
[Scene: A random apartment building, Chandler and Monica are knocking on the door of the woman from the beginning.]