words in movies
Monica: (she enters) Hey guys!
Monica: That place in Vermont? You can take a hint!
Monica: Well, can't you just have the party when we get back?
Monica: Well, I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away. You know, to reconnect... emotionally.
Monica: All right, we'll stay. We can just drive up after the party.
Monica: Believe me, that is not why we won't be doing that!
(Monica and Chandler enter)
Monica: Hey!
Monica: All right... you're right. We're sorry. Now let's wake up Emma and get the fun time started!
Monica: Are you freaking kidding me, Green?
Monica: So glad you came!
Judy: (to Monica) I remember your first birthday! Ross was jealous of all the attention we were giving you. He pulled on his testicles so hard! We had to take him to the emergency room! Ross: (pointing the camcorder at himself) There's something you didn't know about your dad!
Monica: I can't believe Emma is still asleep!
Monica: I've got a plan. I've got a plan. I'm going to ram this platter really hard into your ribs. You're gonna scream out and that'll wake her up!
Chandler: I'm not going to Vermont with this Monica!
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Monica: Oh, did you do a picture of Emma?
(Ross, Chandler and Monica are in the kitchen area)
Monica: Oh. So nice of her to pull my hair, 'till I dropped the key!
Ross: Well, you know what? While we're waiting, you guys could tape your message to Emma for her 18th birthday, huh? (takes the camcorder and points it at Monica and Chandler) Ok!
Monica: We're Aunt Monica and uncle Chandler, by the way. You may not recognize us, because we haven't spoken to your parents in seventeen years!
Monica: Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in a half hour.
Ross: You guys, just please.. a little bit longer. I promise, Rachel will be back with the cake any minute. Monica, remember.. the frosting? huh?
Monica: Alright, 5 more minutes.
Monica: No! Wait! If anybody gets to go.. it's us (Points at herself and Chandler) We've been complaining the longest!
Monica: No, he didn't! He pretended to be a Quaker to get out of Korea.
Monica: Yeah, and we've paid for a room, that we're supposed to be in right now!
Monica: No! no! Let's figure out a fair way to decide who's staying.
Monica: (She gives Joey a you-are-so-stupid-look) Ok, ten.
Joey: Okay, Monica picks ten, I call nine! Anyone else?
Monica: Ok, how about this: We got wind up toys for Emma for her birthday. We can make them race, and whoever comes in last, stays!
Monica: Everybody get your toys! (They all run toward the table with toys)
Monica: Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go (Takes two cups and marks the start and finish lines with them) from here to here. Now the one who comes in last, stays!
(Monica, Phoebe and Joey release their wind-up toys.)
Monica: (to the dog) What are you barking at?
Monica: Wha... How the hell is that gonna help?
Monica: No! No, no... wait! We didn't lose. (turns to Chandler) The rules clearly stated that the last one to cross the finish line was the loser. Well, our dog never crossed the finish line, so technically...
(Monica turns to see the closed door.)
[ Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment. Chandler, Monica and Emma are sitting on the floor, and Emma's stuffed animals are lined up in front of them.]
Monica: Now another way to organise your stuffed animals, is by size.
Chandler: I'm sorry, is this a game for Emma or for Monica?
Monica: Game?
Monica: That's how old you are.
Monica: (embraces Emma tightly) Ooh, I want one...
Monica: ...and head to Canada!
Monica: I wasn't. Let's get going!
Monica: What about your massage client?
Monica: Thanks!
(There's a lot of yelling and screaming coming from the hallway, and they get up to look at what's the noise all about. In the hallway, Monica, Chandler, Joey and Phoebe are having another wind-up animal race, yelling and screaming fanatically.)
(Monica makes a strange face and sits down)
[Scene: The beach. Chandler and Monica are out getting some sun.]
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Monica: I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way. I'm sorry, but iit-t's true, I love him too.
Monica: (pulling Chandler away from the Maitre d') You need to give him money.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, Monica is vacuuming.]
MONICA: Hey, it's Funny's cousin, Not Funny.
Chandler: (to Nancy) Okay, thanks... (to Monica) They passed. They said they wouldn't go a penny under the asking price.
MONICA: But I need it. Otherwords I'm gonna have to take that horrible diner job. You know, with the dancing and the costumes. I don't wanna have to wear flame retardant boobs.
Monica: (Interrupting) Oh, what about that guy over there? (She points at another guy and Gunther is deflated.) Remember? That is the guy you flirted with at the counter that time.
Monica: I cant answer that! Chandlers my husband.
Monica: See there you go. Woo! We're out of the woods. Okay, I'll get dressed now.
(Monica quickly dives under the water as Joey enters. He looks a little shocked at what Chandler's doing.)
Monica: Any time you want. Y'know, when I was younger, all I wanted to do was to play with this dollhouse, but no!! It was to be looked at, but never played with.
Monica: (sitting down) Gary's gonna ask you to move in with him!!
[He walks out of the bedroom and Monica starts to remake the bed.]
Monica: OK, here you go. Good luck.
Monica: Do you wanna go hunting?
[Scene: Iridium, Monica and Paula are working.]
Ross: Monica, Im cutting you off.
Monica: This was fun! But I've got an invasive vaginal exam to get to! (leaves)
[Monica looks around the hallway, pulls out a sponge and starts scrubbing the door frame.]
Monica: You guys are always hanging out in my apartment! Come on, I'll only use my left hand, huh? Come on, wussies! (Joey and Chandler pick her up) All right, ok, I gotta go. I'm going, (they throw her out) and I'm gone.
(Everyone stands up. Cut to Ross and Monica in Nana's room.)
MONICA: 'Cause I was going by it the other day and I saw that there was a stock with my initials, MEG, on it and, well, sometimes I have to watch for two or three hours before it comes up again but when it does, it's pretty exciting.
Monica: Yeah, well, I'll take a little crying any day over Howard-the-"I-win"-guy. (imitating) "I win! I win!" I went out with the guy for two monthsI didn't get to win once.
(just as he gets in front of Margha, Monica comes up and tackles him)
Monica: Okay, stop it Phoebe, youre getting me all tingly.
(They all make happy faces as they are unable to express their feelings verbally. Finally, the phone rings and the race to answer it is won by Monica.)
Joey: Tell me about it, huh? (Realizes that she can see Monica.) Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica! (He pantomimes that out.) Ewwuck! (He pushes Monica away and makes a disgusted face.)
[Scene: Moondance Diner. Ross, Phoebe, Joey, and Chandler are sitting at the counter, Monica is working. Monica is wearing her costume, including big fake breasts.]
[Scene: A tennis court somewhere in the city of New York, it's the doubles match-up of a century Chandler and Monica versus Doug and Kara.]
Monica: No, last time you said it like Dracula, and it scared her! Can I get you anything? You want some more ice chips?
(She closes his door again, and turns around. Then she starts screaming, terrified. There is Glynnis... And Monica holding her up, laughing.)
[Scene: Caesar's Palace Casino, Chandler is looking for Monica while Tom Jones's signature song is playing in the background (Getting the theme yet? Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, casinos They're in Vegas people! Catch up!) It's Not Unusual, y'know, "It's not unusual to be loved by anyone! It's not unusual to have fun with anyone! But when I see you hanging about with anyone, it's not unusual to see me cry! I wanna die." Well, while that's playing he spots Monica playing craps and in victory hug the guy next to her. Chandler turns and walks out.]
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, Monica is picking through her ruined childhood heirlooms with Ross.]
PHOEBE: What, what's about to happen? [starts watching] I've never seen this part before. Hey, Travis, watcha doin' with that gun? Oh no, no no Travis, put down the gun. No no no no, he he's your buddy, he's your Yeller, no, no no, the end, THE END. [hear the gunshot from the TV] [Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Richard is on the balcony smoking and Monica is on the phone.]
Rachel: Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
Monica: Oh, I so can't believe this! My uterus is an inhospitable environment? I was trying so hard to be a good hostess!
Ross: Oh, but he will. He still tells the story how Monica tried to escape from fat camp.
Janine: Thanks. (To Monica and Ross) Great so we can all go together! I gotta run. Catch you later!
Monica: Nice try; Im keeping the boots.
Monica: Eh, we werent that close anyway!
Monica: No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I got married, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the two of you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know I probably dont say it enough, but I love you. (Pretends to cry hoping her parents will join her.) When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought of those who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to be here, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look how cute she is. (Holds up the picture and pretends to cry again). Was. (To an old man by the stage.) Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her and Nana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to her children in Terms of Endearment? (Chandler covers his ears) Didnt see that? No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutes these orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love. (Waits for people to cry, but doesnt get any tears.) You people are made of stone! Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
Monica: (kneels with him) Chandler, umm, I want you to take just a minute and I want you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
Monica: Yeah could-could-could you get me something to drink?
Joey: (leaving Central Perk and seeing Monica laying on top of Rachel who is moaning in pain.) Oh my.
Joey: No-no, stay right there. (Monica stops and Joey flips her a pancake, which flies over her head and lands in the living room.) Gettin closer.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
MONICA: Alright, you see these little flower blossoms? They should be facing up, not down, because, well, the head of the bed is where the sun would be. You don't love me any more do you.
(Monica sets the soup down and Phoebe picks it up and licks the rim.)
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Monica: I know! And four ninety-nine for a pillow top queen set, who cares about the divorce, those babies will sell themselves. (they all stare at her) And Im appalled for you by the way.
Monica: They'r alright.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Look, look, I have elbows! (They scream.)
Monica: And I have costumes.
Monica: Hello? No rejection? I got shot down at fat camp! Boy, kids are mean when theyre hungry.
Monica: Oh, sure it does! In high school, you werent jealous at all even though all your girlfriends were cheating on you!
Monica: All right, listen youre just being silly. Rachel, even with that rumor you were one of the most popular girls in school and everyone wanted to be like you. One girl wanted to be like you so much she stuffed her pants with a Tootsie Roll!
Man: (singing) Mister Pretensous, (Monica stands up in the background) you think there's no one finer, well but your poems are unpublished, and you work in a diner.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Hyper-competitive Monica, Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are still playing catch. Monica is finally tiring while the rest of them are totally exhausted and virtually asleep.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Joey is telling everyone about his impending termination at Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.]
Monica: Well, do you think he was waiting 'til after you left, so he could cry?
Monica: That tape was never meant to be seen by... (pauses) Joey I would feel more comfortable if I was having this conversation in private.
Monica: All right, fine. Tonight's potatoes will be both mashed with lumps, and in the form of tots.
Monica: Hey! Didnt you have that outfit on last night?
Monica: And Phoebe is his friend, so he thinks that would be breaking the rules!
Chandler: Oh, it would be you! You! Monica! And you'd get all the votes!
Monica: (pinching her) Let's get you out of here!! (they go outside)
Monica: Yknow, I-I I have to figure some stYknow, some stuff before I can
Monica: Oh my god. Today's the sixth?! I may be done ovulating! I may have also served some very questionable meat at the restaurant.
Monica: Mmm, looking good. Ok, cider's mulling, turkey's turking, yams are yamming. (notices Ross is depressed) What?
Monica: (re-entering) Im gonna start getting ready! (Goes back into her room.)
Monica: Okay! You get the vacuum cleaner and Ill get the furniture polish!
Monica: Umm. Well, theres Rachel, and umm, I think thats it. How bout you?
Monica: When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, I swam into the lake and fished it out.
Ross: What was Monica’s nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?
MONICA: No you're not. You're, you're allergic to lobster and peanuts and--oh my god.
Chandler: Come on, Monica, things could be worse. You could get caught between the moon and New York City. I know it's crazy, but it's true.
Monica: (to Julio) So! I'm just an empty vase, huh?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower has ended and everyone except for Mrs. Green have left who is talking to Rachel while Monica and Phoebe are cleaning up.]
Monica and Joey: One-Mississippi. Two-Mississippi. Three-Mississippi.
[cut to the living room of the same dwelling, where the funeral guests are mingling. Monica enters.]
Monica: And the way she slaps all the time!
Monica: I swear, I promise. I promise. Oh my God, I'm so excited! {And I just can't hide it! I'm about to lose control and I think I like it! Sorry, just couldn't resist it.} All right, listen let me tell you, do not get her flowers. Okay? Because y'know, she cries when they die, and there's the whole funeral
CHANDLER: Monica, I feel like you should have German subtitles.
Monica: Wow, the boyfriend's parents! That's a big step.
Monica: What are you talking about?! 007 has all those gadgets!
Chandler: (starts to recite a rehearsed speech) Monica is a self-sufficient, together lady. (Pause.) Being with her has been like being on a vacation. And what may be perceived as high maintenance is merely attention to detail and(He falters and Monica prompts him.)generosity of spirit.
Joey: (angrily and monotone) Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can. (Shakes his head in disgust.) The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. (There is applause, which Joey disgustedly waits to dye out.) From One Life to Live Mary Loren Bishop (They start to applaud again, but Joey interrupts in with the rest of the nominees), from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our Lives Jessica Ashley. And the winner is (Opens the envelope) Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives. (Applause) Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldnt be with us tonight so Ill be accepting this award on her behalf. (Realizes something) And Im sure that Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. Shed also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel whos sittin right there! (Points at Rachel.) (The music starts and his microphone is turned off, this angers Joey again and he disgustedly exits.)
MONICA: Alright, but I'm very excited about this OK, so you gotta promise you won't get all big-brothery and judgmental.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Rachel are consoling Chandler.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Only Chandler is there with the videotape in his hands, standing in front of the TV set.]
Monica: Oh Im working on my toast for the party, or as I like to call it. Sob fest 2002. Hey check this out. (Hands him a picture.)
Monica: Oh God bless my dad sound proofing the basement!
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Phoebe is watching a Spanish version of The Waltons. At a nearby table sit Monica knitting, Rachel winding a ball of wool, and Chandler supplying them both from a skein which is spread between his hands.]
Monica: (looking through it) Really? Wow! It looks like I had some trouble staying inside the lines.
Mr. Geller: Wait, how do you zoom out? (zooms out and we see an extremely overweight Monica eating a big sandwich) There she is.
MONICA: Fortunately, it is me. And, they made me head of purchasing, thank you very much. Anyway, I just ran into Ross and Chandler downstairs, and they think we should go out and celebrate. You know, someplace nice.
Monica: Yknow, I only know of two surefire ways to shut a man up. And one of them is sex.