words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, everyone is there and they are finishing watching the first episode of Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Joey is of course Mac.]
Mac: (on TV) Well, if we learned one thing today C.H.E.E.S.E. is that cheerleaders and high explosives dont mix. (Cut to Joey laughing while Rachel, Chandler, and Monica arent amused.)
(They all make happy faces as they are unable to express their feelings verbally. Finally, the phone rings and the race to answer it is won by Monica.)
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Hold on please. Joey, its your mom. (Hands him the phone.)
Monica: Wh-what are we gonna tell him?
Monica: And I have costumes.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Monica are reading on the couch.]
Monica: Phoebe, do you think that your favorite animal says much about you?
Monica and Phoebe: Oh, thats great!!
Rachel: Yeah! Guess who walks into my office is the end of my story. (To Monica and Phoebe) It was Ralph Lauren! (Monica and Phoebe gasp) Ralph Lauren walked into my office!
Monica: Still get a discount on wedding dresses?
Monica: Im so happy for you!
Monica: What?!
Monica: Oooh!
Monica and Phoebe: Ahhh!!
Chandler: No-no-no-no. (Waves him away as Monica and Phoebe enter whispering to each other.) Hey! (Monica shushes him.)
Phoebe: (To Monica) Anyway, I should go. Okay, bye.
Monica: (To Chandler) Hey sweetie.
Monica: I cant tell you. Its a secret.
Monica: Awww. (Kisses him.) But still no.
Monica: Really? Okay, so why dont you tell me what happened to Ross Junior year at Disneyland?
Monica: If you tell me, Ill tell you what Phoebe said.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Oh my God. He threw up?
Chandler: No, he visited a little town south of throw up. (Monica laughs hysterically.) So what was Phoebes secret?
Monica: Oh, Nancy Thompson from Phoebes old massage place is getting fired.
Monica: Thats right! You lose sucker!! (Pause) Please still marry me.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
Chandler: Let me see this guy. (Phoebe hands him the picture.) W-H-Wow! Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is setting the table for dinner as Chandler enters.]
Monica: Hey! Good, youre home!
Monica: Hey baby. (Kisses him.)
Monica: I made you a surprise.
Monica: Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such a craving for them.
Monica: Ross!
Monica: No! No. Theyre umm Theyre just uh ground beef smileys. (Holding up one of the shells.)
Monica: Excuse me Mr. Mexico.
Ross: Eh, either way Ill pass. (Quietly to Chandler) I still cant eat those. (Monica is getting something out of the fridge and starts laughing.) Whats so funny?!
Monica: (trying not to laugh) Im not laughing.
Chandler: Nancy Thompsons getting fired! (Monica slaps him on the shoulder.)
Ross: (To Monica) Look, okay-okay I had food poisoning! Its not like I choose to do it! Its not likeIts not like I said, "Umm, what would make this ride more fun?!"
Monica: Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt be laughing. I should be laying down papers for you! (Runs off laughing which gets Chandler laughing.)
Ross: Oh really? Well I-I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Monica: (running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!
Monica: (To Chandler) You kissed a guy?!! Oh my God.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are still giving away all of their secrets.]
Monica: Oh my God! (Laughing)
Monica: I-I already told him everything! (Threateningly) You shush!!
Ross: Once Monica was sent to her room without dinner, so she ate the macaroni off a jewelry box shed made.
Monica: Ross used to stay up every Saturday night to watch Golden Girls!
Ross: Monica couldnt tell time til she was 13!
Monica: Its hard for some people!
Chandler: (To Monica) Of course it is. (Mouths to Ross) Wowwhoa!
Monica: Chandler one time wore my underwear to work!
Monica: Ohh, Im sorry I couldnt think of anymore for Ross!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are sitting there and not talking to each other.]
Monica: Yknow, in my defense, umm there was no glitter on the macaroni and very little glue.
Chandler: (To Monica) You have no trouble telling time now right?
Monica: No!
Monica: I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?! (Ross laughs.) What are you laughing at Pampers? (He stops laughing and glares at her.)
Monica: Yeah?
Monica: Ohh, absolutely.
Monica: Yeah, definitely!
Monica: Then, Id steer clear of Phoebe.
Ross: Man! (Monica mouths, "Im sorry.")
Rachel: Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (Monica opens the door.) Emily?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the ring he bought and not liking it.]
MONICA: I know, how can you not be accross the hall anymore.
Monica: So, we did okay at the strip club, right?
Monica: Come on! Chandler!
Monica: Really?!
Monica: Thats-thats not Phase Three.
Joey: Hey, Monica bought a bed from the Mattress King?
Monica: (to Phoebe) You know it's funny, the last time Paulo was here, my hair was so much shorter and cuter.
Monica: Oh, Chantal!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: (looking at Chandler sleeping with a balloon in his mouth) So sexy. (Waking him up.) Honey.
Monica: Wait, now, what am I doing again?
Monica: They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! How can you not care?
Monica: Hey, guys, guys, did you see my new, china cabinet?!
(Monica, Ross, Chandler, and Joey exit.)
Monica: Janice?!
Monica: How have you been?
MONICA: Fine, go have sex.
RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stock market.
Monica: Wow! And you got a petticure. Your feet are all dressed up.
Monica: (she enters with a headset on and she's speaking into the microphone) Well, it matters to me!
Monica: So, did you play in college? (She points to his NYU Soccer (football for the rest of the world) sweatshirt he's wearing.)
Monica: Done?
Phoebe: Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married. I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked. (Raises her glass and drinks.)
Phoebe: This is so cool, til Monica gets back, its like Im head chef and I get to make all the decisions. (She looks at the remaining butter, and then decides to add it to the dish.)
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
Ross: (to Monica) Well, you were right. How can they do this to us, huh? It's Thanksgiving.
JOEY: Monica, relax, go get a beer.
Monica: Used to work with her. Used to! Im a relative and I didnt get invited! A blood relative! Blood!!
Monica: Because your all gonna make up fake specials and make me cook them like you did the other night?
Monica: Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting one of those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, this cant be there.
Monica: Saucy!
Monica: Umm. (nodding her head, "Good.")
Monica: Well, it was the first time. Yknow, theres not always a lot of agreement the first time.
Monica: He asked you out?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's hotel room. They enter.]
Monica: I-I-I think you look great.
Monica: The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own for a while!
Phoebe: (pushing Monica back onto the couch) Its so inspired! Look at him! Look at him go!
Monica: Hi!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica enters with some mail.]
Monica: No-no-no, no!
(In the rooms next door, Joey, Rachel, Ross and Charlie stop kissing and try to understand what the yelling was about. After a while they continue kissing. We're back in Chandler and Monica's room. Monica has some of her own hair stuffed in her mouth by Chandler.)
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
Monica: Hi. About last night... I know you are under a lot of stress and even though the things you said hurt me a little bit... My point is, uh, well, I'm willing to take my job back.
Monica: Is anyone thankful for anything else besides a thong?
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
Monica: Thats because their nerves are probably deadened from being so stupid. But hey, y'know if you dont believe me, please, by my guest.
[Time lapse, Monica accidentally spilled her drink on Bob's shirt and is wiping it off. Joey is making eyes at Angela.]
Monica: Okay. (She does so and starts to walk towards Joey to receive her pancakes.)
Monica: Yeah, I talked to you on the phone, Im the lady that got stuck with the racecar bed.
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
Phoebe: I sang. (To Monica) Hah!
Mike: (disbelieving) I think I will be all right! (to Monica) You wanna volley a bit for a serve?
Ross: I found a note on my door, "Come to Monicas quick, bring champagne and a Three Musketeers bar."
Monica: (laughing harder) You know the words! You are so into this!
Monica: Wow. That is not a happy hi.
Monica: Okay, but wouldnt it be easier if you had to tell me something that you could tell me.
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Ross: (interrupting Monica and Emily) So we should probably get going soon.
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
Monica: You changed?
Monica: There it is. Joey, what are you doing?
Monica: We thought since Phoebe was staying over tonight we'd have kinda like a slumber party thing. We got some trashy magazines, we got cookie dough, we got Twister... (The phone rings and Monica answers it.)
Monica: Or Spin the Bottle?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the scene is continued from earlier.]
[Scene: A kitchen where Phoebe and Monica are finishing up a catering job]
Monica: All right, be my guest.
Joey and Monica: Are you all right?
Monica: He had to go, theres a deer just outside eating fruit from the orchard.
(Joey and Monica rush over to her.)
Monica: I think youre done.
[Cut to Monica and Rachels apartment, all are there.]
Monica: Ohh, everybody at the restaurant still hates me.
Chandler: Love her! That's right, I LOVE HER!!! I love her!! (They walk together and hug.) I love you, Monica.
RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
Monica: All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be able to focus?
Chandler: (To Monica) Now all you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and dont talk to anyone.
Monica: Run, Marcel, run! Run, Marcel! (Marcel runs off and Luisa runs after him. Monica goes to check up on Phoebe) Are you okay?
[Scene: Allesandros, Monica is cooking.]
Monica: I think I need a drink.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Oh. Why didnt you take her?
Monica: Do you love her?
Monica: You love her!
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Rachel is talking to Monica about her job.]
Monica: Oh good, Im glad thats catching on.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Joey is entering]
Monica: Where ya going?
Monica: And well, what did she say?
Monica: Oh, youre totally welcome! Whatd she say?
Monica: You know!
Monica: It is not over! Youre over!