words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Monica: Youre kidding!
Monica: Ross!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Monica are at the counter getting some more coffee.]
Monica: Joey, why dont you put them in the lost and found?
Monica: Oh my God, what a fun day! That sounds great!
Monica: Dont worry about it Phoebe, well absolutely do it.
Monica: Come on Chandler, come on! Itll give us great practice for when(realizes what shes about to say and changes)people with babies come to visit.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Rachel are having tea.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next day, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are baby-sitting the triplets. They each have one baby.]
Monica: Pheebs, hows it going?
Monica: Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, its going great. Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.
Monica: What do you mean?
[Time lapse, they have set up a little assembly line for diaper changes. Phoebe wipes, Chandler adds the powder, begrudgingly, and Monica puts the diaper on.]
Monica: This is so great! This is exactly how we set the plates at the restaurant.
Joey: The ones that got me the Porsche! Will you keep up! (Chandler wipes his forehead with a baby wipe, that might have been used. He drops it disgustedly.) But I figured, if-if people keep seeing me just standing there, theyre gonna start to think that I dont own it. So I figured Ill wash it. Right? Monica, you got a bucket and some soap I can borrow?
Monica: Oh yeah, I got soap and sponges and rags and Carnuba wax and polishing compound.
Monica: I know. But umm, one time there was this really dirty car in front of the building, so I washed it.
Monica: And six others.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the triplets are all in their crib as Monica and Phoebe watch them.]
Monica: Yeah, two hours, a lifetime thats the same.
Monica: Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someones eye out!
Chandler: Glass, sand, whatever. (Walks out as Monica and Phoebe turn to check on the babies again.)
Monica: Oh its so cute. I wonder what age it is when you stop being able to put both legs over your head.
Monica: How are you still single?!
Monica: Good. What made you change your mind?
Monica: Damnit! Yknow this whole time we were concentrating on watching the babies and, and no one was watching Chandler! (He does it again.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is still doing the hairball thing as Monica and Phoebe are watching the babies. I cant describe it, youll have to see it when it comes on in your area.]
Monica: And people will think you own a Porsche because youre wearing the clothes?
Monica: Joey, you know you dont actually have one.
Monica: All right, thats it, were going to the emergency room.
Monica: The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own for a while!
Monica: Hes got something plastic lodged in his throat, weve got to go to the hospital.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is being triple teamed.]
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
[Time Lapse, the babies are finally asleep. Good for Phoebe! The only problem is, Monicas apartment looks like a tornado, a hurricane, a swarm of locusts, fire, brimstone, hail, and giant man-eating, radioactive ants have torn the place apart. Needless to say, its messy enough to cause Monica to die of shock right away. Parents with small children know what Im talking about.]
(Monica enters and her jaw drops in horror.)
Monica: Oh my God.
Monica: Phoebe, what, what happened here?!
Monica: But my apartment!
Monica: But the mess!
Monica: Youre right, youre right I shouldnt freak out. Cause this is what will happen when you and I have babies! When will that be?!
Monica: Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love me you-youll let it go.
Chandler: Great! (to Monica) This baby'd better to be really good.
Monica: Yeah. I mean it was kinda fun for a while, but didnt you start feeling silly?
Monica: Ok.
Monica: What does the red X next to Bob Greenmore's name mean?
(Chandler hangs up and calls Monica who is reading a book on their sofa as the phone rings.)
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Somebody knocks the door]
Monica: Oh my God, the adoption lady is early!
Monica: I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding!
Monica: Okay, can we change the topic? Because its really doing nothing for me.
Monica: Yay!
Monica: Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not just goof around with him.
Monica: I guess with you doing the internship, we're just spending more than we're bringing in.
Monica: (shouts to Chandler) And make sure our room isn't next to theirs (points to Phoebe).
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, the bad desert Ross is quickly eating the mound on his plate.]
Janice: (entering and singing) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.
Monica: Would you like something to drink?
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Somebody knocks the door]
Monica: Really? What is it?
Monica: Okay! Okay! Okay! (She succeeds in getting the eye drops in and everyone climbs off of Rachel.) We'll see you in about 3 to 4 hours.
Monica: Well, if you're gonna be totally rational about this, I can't argue with you! All right? Fine, if you wanna tell him, tell him. I just don't want to be a part of it.
Monica: Noo!! Its driving me crazy. I mean every other way hes like the perfect guy, he has everything. Plus! He actually has everything.
MONICA: Really? Weird. Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. I planned and I planned and I planned. It just turns out, I don't think I planned enough time to actually do it.
Monica: Maybe we could call the phone company. Maybe they could change the message. Maybe they can change his number.
Monica: I'm gonna miss this hand! Okay I know it's a lot to ask, but oh my God Chandler, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
[Scene: the hotel game room. There is a ping pong table in the middle of the room. Monica, Phoebe, Chandler and Mike walk in]
Monica: (To Chandler) What room should we see next?
Monica: (angrily) That is exactly why I do not lend you stuff!! (Rachel looks over at Phoebe in resignation.) Okay?! I mean, first it's my jewelry! And if it's not my jewelry, it's-it's my blue sweater! And if it's not my sweater, it's my sunglasses!
(Monica Enters. Chandler is in the kitchen with his laptop)
Laura: (embarrassed towards Chandler and Monica) Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
Monica: Yeah, that we totally understand. Dating is hard.
(Chandler and Monica hug and after a while the telephone rings again... Monica's eyes get bigger. Chandler answers.)
Monica: So, we're just four losers... SUPER!
Monica: Hey guys!
Monica: So, do you guys wanna come and eat dinner at the restaurant sometime in the next few weeks?
Monica: (To Chandler) How does that laugh not give you a headache?
Monica: We need to talk to you about something.
Monica: (recognizing him and panicking) No you dont!
Monica: No, it's not!
Monica: Yeah, but he wants to talk to you before anything really happens with her. And as his friend, I mean, don't you think he deserves the same from you?
Monica: Thank you, Pheebs!
Monica: What? You are way off, lady!
Monica: Sounds like shes got the ah, whole package.
Monica: That's my favourite kind! Okay, we are doing this!
Monica: Hey, stay out of this, Chandler! This is between me... and ME!
(Monica leaves)
Monica: Well, we thought we would all go to a picnic (Phoebe gasps), in Central Park!
Monica: Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
Monica: You don't know that.
(Monica enters, with her hair braided and little shells at the end)
Monica: Name one of his books.
Monica: Oh, Chandler, that's sweet. But you don't have to do everything Doctor Phil tells you to do.
Monica: Ok, let's see... uhm, okay, the turkey is in the oven, the stuffing is ready...
Monica: Im fine now, but it was really scary there for a while. I mean, someone slipped a-a threatening note under the door.
Monica: (gasps) Oooh! They are in for a world of pain!
Monica: Oh! They're late and they're sloppy!
Monica: Its okay. I suppose it could happen to anyone, not anyone I know, but... By the way I can still see it.
Monica: What? Are you serious?! (To Chandler) Joey smells gas!
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
[Scene: Cousin Frannies Wedding Reception, Monica and Ross are sitting at the table, alone as a woman approaches.]
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: That's all the turkey you're gonna get.
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Monica: Hey, you touch that and you will be sorry.
(Monica looks insulted)
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
[cut to Monica and Chandler]
Monica: Its almost 8 oclock, its almost past his bedtime. Where-where is he?
(Monica is now smiling)
Chandler: They were just giving those away at the store (off Monicas look) in exchange for money.
Monica: Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
Monica: Yeah, they do seem to feel pretty bad.
(Monica takes it and reads the label)
Monica: Grand Supreme Little Darling?
Monica: The three of us?
Monica: Joey, that is not gonna work.
Monica: Okay, try it.
Monica: Bring it.
Monica: Here you go!
(And with that, an era ends as Chandler moves in with Monica as Rachel moves in with Phoebe. It tis a sad and happy time for Friends.)
Monica: Oh!
Monica: Chandler, where are your tools?
Monica: I do, but Rachel borrowed them.
Rachel: To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
Monica: There's a pregnant woman in Ohio, and she picked us!
Monica: WE'RE GETTING A BABY!
Monica: That was the adoption agency...
(Monica enters from the spare bedroom.)
Monica: (very emotional) I don't care.
Monica: Hey!
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Monica: ...and head to Canada!
Monica: And a lot could still get in our way.
Monica: Oh my God. She's gonna pick us!
Monica: Well... obviously!
Monica: Uh, we're gonna be great.
Chandler: I suppose that Monica will have the � manipulative shrew.
Monica: Hi. It is so, so nice to meet you.
Monica: I don't know about that.
Monica: (Gets up) Okay, okay. You two (to Phoebe and Rachel) go get the dessert. And I'll let you in.