words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Chandler and Monica enter. Oh, and Joey is wearing a FDNY T-shirt to make this the first nod to the tragedy that Friends have made.]
Monica: Hey you guys?
Monica: I know its last minute, but we decided to have a Halloween party.
Monica: And everybody has to wear costumes. (And theres general disconcertment.) Come on! Itll be fun!
Monica: You have to!
Monica: So Ross, are you gonna bring Mona?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, The Halloween party has started. Monica is setting out some food as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Wait! Youre supposed to wear a costume!
Monica: Oh.
Monica: Im Catwoman, who wants to borrow the dress when youre too big for it.
Rachel: Yeah. Sure. (Throws some in her bag and she walks away as Phoebe, dressed as Supergirl walks up and eyes Monica who eyes her back.)
Monica: So we do Supergirl.
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume
Rachel: (To Monica) Oh, you did this to him?
Monica: What?! I thought hed love it! His favorite kid's book was the Velveteen Rabbit!
Monica: Well, it was either a pink bunny or no bunny at all.
Monica: You didnt dress up either?!
Rachel: Ohh Oh, honey here. Take it all. (Pours the entire large bowl into her bag and closes the door.) Monica! We need more candy?
Monica: What?! Theres only been like four kids.
Monica: What are you supposed to be?
Monica: No, space doody!
[Time lapse, Monica is going over to talk to Joey.]
Monica: Hey Joey?
Monica: You read comic books right?
Monica: Who do you think would win in a fight, Catwoman or Supergirl?
Monica: Yeah
Monica: What?! Really?!
Monica: No youre fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?
Monica: What?! Come on I am tough! Punch me right here! (Her stomach) As hard as you can!
Monica: Oh really? Okay? Well what would you say if I told you that, yknow, Ross or Chandler could beat you up?
Monica: Oh my God, Phoebe!
Monica: Youre getting a crush on your sisters fianc�e.
Joey: (To Monica) Here comes the temper.
[Cut to Joey and Monica.]
Monica: I cant answer that! Chandlers my husband.
Monica: Yeah.
Joey: (To Monica) Hey-hey-hey, I think we might find out the answer to our question.
Joey: Monica and I were talking about who could kick whose ass in a fight, you or Ross?
(Monica turns around slowly.)
Chandler: (To Monica) You picked Ross?!
Monica: Ross is really strong! Okay, hes the strongest out of all three of you! (Joey looks at her.) Except for Joey.
Monica: Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop! (Breaks it up.) Now listen, no ones gonna fight in this apartment.
Joey: Hey Monica! (Grabs her and pulls her into the living room.) People came to see a fight, lets give em what they came for!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the party continues with Rachel leaning on the counter as Gunther walks in carrying candy.]
Monica: (To Chandler) Look honey, you dont have to do this, okay? Its the strength you have inside that means the most to me. Youre loyal, youre honest, and you have integrity! Thats the kind of strength that I want in the man that I love!
[Scene: The Hallway, Phoebe is exiting Monica and Chandlers, and finds Ursula standing in the hallway smoking.]
[Time Lapse: the crowd has left and only Mona, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are still watching to see who will be able to move the others arm first. An event that has yet to happen.]
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh God!
Monica: Chandlers making his sex face.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.]
Monica: Look, I wanted to tell Im-Im sorry you lost.
Monica: (laughs) Is that a secret or a lie.
Monica: Chandler please!
Monica: Lets go big bunny!
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma continues crying while Rachel, Monica and Phoebe try different methods to stop her crying.]
Monica: (Tiny laugh) I am really an idiot. (Tiny laugh) you see, I was filling out my friend's form, and instead of putting her information, (tiny laugh) I put mine.
Monica: I dont need a tissue! Im fine-d!
Monica: Besides, it takes the focus off the hat.
Ross: What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica, because Im only down by three touchdowns.
Monica: Fine! Don't be my friends! I'll buy new friends! Yeah, and then I'll pay for their plastic surgery so they'd look just like you!
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
Monica: No, wait, please dont go! Ive got porn for you too!
Chandler: No! Youre the sweetest! (He tries to kiss her but Monica backs away with a look that could kill on her face.)
MONICA: It bit. It was a 50's theme restraunt. I have to cook in a costume and dance on the counter. I mean I was a chef at Cafe des Artistes. I mean how could I take a job where I have to make something called Laverne and Curly Fries?
(An 80's Rachel and fat Monica walk into the party room. Both with funny hair-do's and clothes)
Erica: No... he killed his father with a shovel. (Monica and Chandler's jaws drop) But other than that, he's a great guy.
Chandler: Well, you know what they say, elephants never forget. (Monica is not amused by that statement.) Seriously, good luck marrying me.
MONICA: Who is also in charge of purchasing.
Monica: (entering) Hey guys! Do you wanna look at the song list for the wedding? (They ignore her.) Guys?
Monica: 'S'going pretty good, y'know? It's nice, and, we're having fun.
Monica: Yeah. Run ten blocks, thatll help the smell.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey and Chandler are still deciding what to do about the hooker.]
[Scene: The Hallway between the Apartments, Ross is hiding behind that bump out on Monicas side waiting for Phoebe and Rachel. As they come up the stairs, he jumps out and yells ]
Monica: Alright, lets say that it is him, would we not want the baby? No! Would we treat him any differently?
Rachel: Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are relaxing in sexual bliss.]
(Nana passes for the second time and the nurse pulls the blanket over her. Ross and Monica go to tell the family)
Will: Sure! Monica, I cant get over how great you look! You look stunning!
[Scene: Las Vegas, we have the typical glamour shots of Vegas, the Strip, slot machines, a couple other gaming tables all set to the tune of you guessed it, Money. Anyhoo, we finally get through that and watch Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe enter Caesar's Palace carrying their luggage.]
Monica: Wow! Youre a lot sturdier that Chandler. He crumpled like a piece of paper. So how was youre trip?
Monica: Well, we... (makes quotation signs in the air) "bore false witness"... See I could be a reverend.
[Scene: The Bings�. Monica in bathrobe, merely covered. Someone�s knocking at the door.]
Monica: (entering with Rachel) All right boys, last chance for the tickets!
Phoebe: Oh, well, it doesnt have a nameoh, okay, Phoebeball! No, it doesnt have a name. Umm, okay, Monica, what is your favourite thing about trees?
Monica: They've only been going out for a few weeks and Phoebe is completely hung up on Mike! She'll say "No", David's heart will be broken, it will be too hard for them to recover from and then Phoebe will end up alone again.
MONICA: Rachel, it's a world where Joey is a neuro-surgeon.
Monica: I might've said that. (Chandler laughs.) Why is that funny?
Monica: I gotta make up the guest bedroom. (To Ross) Hey, Cousin Cassie is coming to stay with us a few days.
Monica: (into phone) Pants and a sweater? Why, mom? Who am I gonna meet in a blackout? Power company guys? Eligible looters? Could we talk about this later? OK. (hangs up)
Monica: Oh, when you get over this breakup we need to go shopping.
Chandler: Oh, yes. Well its very beautiful. Its cream-colored and tight [Realizes what he just said and looks worried. Monica and Ross also looked shocked. Judy and Jack give Chandler a very dirty look.] I dont mean tight, I mean its not too tight, not that I was looking at-[giving up all hope, he puts his head into his hands.]
Monica: Well, I guess we should go back in. When you gave me another chance, I guess we should do the same for Amanda.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, the next day. Phoebe is busy making a sandwich.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are sitting in their recliners watching TV. Monica, Ross, and Phoebe are there.]
Monica: Look, I'm not happy about this either, but y'know if-if Ross says he's happy then we're just gonna have to keep our feelings about Emily to ourselves. Are you cool with that?
Monica: Why? (She hops into the living room and imitates Chandler's happy dance.)
MONICA: There's no man in here.� How dare you accuse me of that.� (She slaps Chandler.)
Monica: (entering, to Joey and Rachel) Hey, did you guys know, that your oven doesn't work?
(Monica (Courtney Cox) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) are laughing. That then causes Lisa and Jennifer come out of character and start laughing hysterically. And that finally causes David Schwimmer to come out of character and start laughing as well. Matthew decides to sing along now as well.)
Monica: Hey! Umm, I think Brenda needs a raise.
Monica: It's my new perfume. Why don't you come closer where you can really appreciate it?
Monica: Honey, thanks for trying to figure out a way, but if you're going to Tulsa, I wanna go with you.
Monica: Yeah, I mean yeah, I look great. Yeah, I feel great and yeah, my heart is not in trouble anymore! Blah, blah, blah! Y'know I still don't feel like I got him back, y'know? I just want to humiliate him. I wanna, I want him to be like naked and then I'm going to point at him and laugh!
Monica: How many fingers am I holding up? (She's not holding any up.)
Chandler: Because its flattering! (Shivers harder) Come on Monica! Come on Monica! (He goes inside.)
Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. Thats what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tiered wedding cake (Starting to cry), with the little people on top. (Ross gets thrown a box of Kleenex from the bathroom and he gives her one.) Thanks. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
(She gives Monica a big binder that's perfectly in order.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Ross are both pouting and sitting on the couch.]
Monica: I got it! (She hits a forehand smash that bounces right in between Doug and Kara and scores a point.)
Chandler: Now, that's a lot harder than it sounds. You always forget at least one, or in some cases... fourteen (looks over to Monica).
Rachel: No Monica! Im serious! Oh, maybe I should just forget about it. Become a lesbian or something.
Monica: Honey, that's okay. I actually know this woman, Nancy, who's a restaurant biz head-hunter. Maybe she'll know of something.
[Scene: Another street, somewhere along the River Themes, Ross, Emily, and Monica are walking to where theyre gonna get married. Emily is relating the troubles with the caterer.]
Monica: (entering from her room, excitedly) Im getting married today!!! (She trips and falls.) (Getting up) I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont care because todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! (Runs back into her room.)
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
[Cut to Living Room, Rachel is sleeping on the couch, Ross is gone, the rest of them can finally emerge from their cell. They all wave good bye, and start to walk quietly out, as Monica goes and puts a blanket on Rachel. Joey starts walking all hunched over and bobbing his shoulders as he goes.]
Monica: A jazz trio for cocktails. The Bay City Rollers for dancing. Wait, that was from my sixth grade wedding.
Phoebe: Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word. (Chandler and Monica look surprised) Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh, "Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm not hanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!" Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves! (She starts to walk out) In this world history teaches us nothing! (Exits)
Monica: Hey Maureen! (They hug.) Gosh! Hey uh, Chandler? This is my cousin Maureen.
[cut to later, Tim has left. Monica is still shivering. Theres a knock on the door.]
Monica: Sure. Oh, um, Chandler? Y'know, the-the old Monica would-would remind you to scrub that Teflon pan with a plastic brush...But I'm not gonna do that.
Monica: I mean, was it Gina?
Monica: So Nancy told me about this job at this great restaurant, Javo (sp?). It's just a little outside of Tulsa.
Waitress: Hey Monica, theres a customer who wants to complement the chef, should I let him in?
[Monica pushes Ben down the aisle in a stroller. Susan is escorted by both her parents. Carol is escorted by Ross.]
Monica: You dont? (Laughs) Well, thats the difference between a professional and a layman.
MONICA: Yes. I hated you. I mean I, I, loved you in a 'you're my brother so I have to' kind of way, but basically, yeah, I hated your guts.
Monica: Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
(No one can and Monica looks at Joey expectantly.)
Monica: Yeah, a-a-and clean. Not just health department clean... Monica clean.
Monica: Umm, I'd love too! (She goes over and picks up the box and decides to follow Rachel's advice and holds the box up to her cheek.) Ooh, I love macaroni and cheese. I love-I love the way this box feels against my cheek.
Monica: That is so sweet! (She kisses him and turns to add some sugar to her tea.)
Ross: That bitch! (He gets up and they go over to ambush Frannie. Monica taps on Frannies shoulder.)
Monica: Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance!
Monica: You gave her food poisoning!?
[Scene: A street, Chip is walking Monica to his motorcycle.]
Monica: (Entering from her bedroom, talking on the phone) Yeah, once again, I am sorry. Thank you. Bye. (To the gang) I just had to turn down a job catering a funeral for sixty people.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are sitting at a table. Monica is checking her makeup as Chandler suddenly has a horrifying thought and starts patting down his pockets until he finds what hes looking for and sighs in relief.]
Ross: No, Monicas restaurant got a horrible review in the Post. (They all gasp.) I didnt want her to see it, so I ran around the neighborhood and bought all the copies I could find. (He hands the paper to Phoebe and they all read it.)
Monica: And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive. (To Rachel) (Starts to cry) You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! (They both break down in tears.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there with her boyfriend Roger, talking to Rachel and Monica.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is getting ready for a date with Monica as Ross enters.]
MONICA: I've been great, just great. How have you been? [tilting her head]
Monica: What happened? You still have the Monica wedding fund dont you?
Monica: Uh yeah, I-I actually I thought about you a couple months ago.
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Phoebe: All right, prude... Look, Monica and Chandler really love this house. You are not gonna talk them into staying here.
Monica: Believe me, Chandler and I have not seen each other in over a week. We�ll probably be the first ones there.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone. Rachel walks in and overhears the conversation.]
Chandler: Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.
MONICA: [Opens the door] I need to borrow a hundred bucks.
Monica: I know...God. I haven't seen my savings take a hit like this since I was a kid and they came up with double-stuffed Oreos. What happened to all our money?
Erica: Yeah. It's a sonogram they took of the baby last week. I thought you might want to see it. (gives it to Monica, who looks at it for a long time, and then shows it to Chandler)