words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planets most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. Shes the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.
Monica: Im fine.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Monica: Oh Uh
[Cut to Monica and Chandlers just after Monica has finished telling Chandler what happened.]
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Monica: Well, she actually has a boyfriend yknow herself, named Clark. Uh, she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
Monica: Huh?
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Monica: Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Monica: Really?
Monica: So-so you wouldve just lied?
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Monica: Good, so do it Saturday night because were going to dinner with her and Clark.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Monica: He might still show up.
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: Its actually going to be just family.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Monica: Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
Monica: Well just well just let her stay.
Monica: Kinda like your Barca lounger.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Phoebe: Hey, does Monica know about her broken plates yet?
Monica: Honey, if you know it through a wall, you know it too well!
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: Okay, heres your milk. What do you want to talk about? (She sees that Chandler has fallen asleep and slams the door loudly to wake him up.)
Monica: You what? You said you liked them.
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, Rachel is entering carrying two glasses of wine. She gives one to Phoebe, keeps one, and completely ignores Monica.]
[Outside the window, Monica and Chandler jog up. Monica playfully pushes him. They start puching and slapping harder and harder until Monica pushes him down. Chandler stands up, with a serious expression, and chases her away.]
Monica: Ok, how about this: We got wind up toys for Emma for her birthday. We can make them race, and whoever comes in last, stays!
Monica: And the eye!
Monica: Fine, so you don't like them. Everybody else does.
Monica: No, those first two windows, (Points) that's the lobby. And y'know the other one over there, that's the stairway. You've been counting wrong.
(He turns his back to Monica and does the international sign for big boobies again.)
Monica: Not really.
Monica: I have a problem.
Monica: Well, I was dancing around, and singing "No Woman, No Cry" and I got stuck.
Monica: Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she's popping pills.
Monica: Really? I don't really feel like it.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Monica are all there as Chandler enters wearing glasses.]
Monica: Sure, what do you have in mind?
Chandler: You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...? (Monica starts laughing, but very exaggerated. Joey realises they also should laugh and punches Ross. Now all three of them laugh, but very fake. Chandler seems happy again.)
Monica: Hey.
Monica: I don't know!
Monica: That's sweet. Drink your hair.
(Monica glares at him.)
Monica: That's not really how it works.
Monica: Which one is which again?
Monica: Hi Frank.
Monica: Okay, but there is a wire back there! I mean that switch is connected to something!
Phoebe: Okay. (Monica closes the door, gets the guitar, and then hands it out.)
Monica: Oh my god!
Monica: Thank you so much for seeing us. Phoebe has told us such great things about you guys.
Monica: (closing the door) Its unbelievable! I-I cant believe that sign didnt work!
(Monica looks at him.)
Monica: Well, we appreciate anything you can tell us.
Monica: It's.. It's just so pretty and white.
Monica: Can I adopt you?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is relating his recent conversation with Emily to the gang.]
Monica: They're in the kitchen getting something to eat. Can you believe how nice they are?
Monica: Why? What did you do in the bathroom?
Monica: (Holding a shirt in front of Ross.) Okay, maybe this will make your teeth look less white. (Ross has a big smile.) Nope. Okay, colors that dont work are blue, yellow, green, red, black, white, orange, and purple.
Monica: I know! Now look, theres only one problem though. Theres only room for one, so I guess one of you will have to stay at Joeys.
Monica: Hey, Phoebs
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is sitting at the kitchen table staring at the phone as Monica enters.]
Monica: What?
[Chandler and Monica head out with some stuff. Phoebe comes out of her room with a bag.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter to find Phoebe there with the triplets.]
Chandler: Owen didn't know he was adopted, and Monica told him.
(Monica, Phoebe, Chandler and Mike walk away, sipping their drinks)
Monica: (to Chandler) Hey sweetie! (they kiss)
Chandler: (To Monica) Why...why?
Monica: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Chandler gets pedicures!
Monica: Hey Phoebe!
Monica: There. Here's their card.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. He's prying open the drawer with a crowbar to no avail. Monica, Rachel and Chandler enter.]
MONICA: No, honey, in a wonderful way. You know what you want now. Most guys don't even have a clue. You are ready to take risks, you are ready to be vulnerable, and intimate with someone.
Monica: What?
Monica: Oh, what are we gonna do! I don't wanna see her!!
Monica: Okay Ill take her, here. (Takes Emma)
Monica: And listen to this... (shakes her body so the shells tingle)
Monica: Yeah, you can hear everything through these stupid walls.
Monica: I think I hear curtains closing...
Monica: How about fifty bucks?
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Monica and Phoebe are reading magazines when the phone rings and Phoebe reaches to pick it up]
Monica: It could be Amanda!
Monica: And you would?
Monica: We weren’t picking up, it’s Amanda!
Amanda: Yes, I was looking for Monica.
Monica: No that was Jarred! Wow! I havent thought about him in a long time (Stares off into the distance lost in thought.) (Pause) Anyway, umm Wills, Wills here on business and he didnt have a place to go so I invited him here.
Monica: One Two Three...
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment]
Monica: Why don't you just call her?
Monica: Hey Phoebe!
Monica: Is Amanda here yet?
Monica: Hi!
Chandler: No, no resentment, believe me, it's worth it. 'Kay? Y'know in a relationship you have these key moments that you know you'll remember for the rest of your life? Well, every- single- second is like that with Aurora.. and I've just wasted about thirty-five of them talking to you people, so, uh.. Monica, can you help me with the door? (He has armloads of stuff.)
Monica: Hi Honey! We're all here; we just want to wish you a Merry Christmas.
Monica: (pause) (to Phoebe) Chandler gets pedicures!
Chandler: (without taking his eyes off the bra) You don't know! (Monica just smiles)
Monica: When were we not friends?
(Monica looks shocked)
Monica: Oh My God!
Monica: (To Phoebe) You were going to cut me out?
Monica: Ehm, we were friends in 1992.
Monica: Wait a minute! He stopped talking the minute Phoebe came in!
Monica: Nope! (She turns and leaves)
Monica: You wanna fool around with Joey?
Monica: I have nothing to say to you.
Monica: We are not friends with Phoebe anymore.
[Monica and Chandlers apartment.]
Phoebe: Please, Monica? In the hall?
Monica: I'm still all those things!
Monica: Why don't you just be straight with her? Tell her the truth.
Monica: I can't believe you tried to cut me out. Why Phoebe, why?
Monica: (running back into the room) Kiss him, you fool!!
Monica: I won't know what I would do without you.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Monica are curled up on one of the chairs.]
Monica: You're a really good kisser.
(Rachel, Joey and Chandler pat him on his shoulders and walk off, together with Monica)