words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planets most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. Shes the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.
Monica: Im fine.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Monica: Oh Uh
[Cut to Monica and Chandlers just after Monica has finished telling Chandler what happened.]
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Monica: Well, she actually has a boyfriend yknow herself, named Clark. Uh, she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
Monica: Huh?
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Monica: Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Monica: Really?
Monica: So-so you wouldve just lied?
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Monica: Good, so do it Saturday night because were going to dinner with her and Clark.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Monica: He might still show up.
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: Its actually going to be just family.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Monica: Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
Monica: Well just well just let her stay.
Monica: Kinda like your Barca lounger.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Chandler: I suppose that Monica will have the � manipulative shrew.
Monica: Hi. It is so, so nice to meet you.
Monica: I don't know about that.
Monica: (Gets up) Okay, okay. You two (to Phoebe and Rachel) go get the dessert. And I'll let you in.
Phoebe: (while Monica drags her in the restaurant) Get your garlic-peelers off me!
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are sharing a bowl of popcorn, while Monica carefully reads the instruction manual for her television set.]
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica is in the kitchen, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are sitting around the table writing one notepads while Chandler is looking over their shoulders.]
Monica: (naughty in doorway) Welcome home. I�ve missed you. join me in the bedroom?
Monica: Thank you. (To Chandler.) I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
Monica: Uh, good hands. (she holds Chandler hands) Healing hands.
Monica: We don’t?
Monica: (thinks about it) All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire he is out of there!
Chandler: We're not gonna have this conversation again... Look at this place. Why am I so intimidated by this guy? Pretentious art, this huge macho couch. When we know all he does is sit around all day crying about losing Monica to a real man! (laughs) You don't think he's here, do you? (Joey looks around)
Monica: C'mon Chandler, I think we have been given an opportunity. I mean, the mistake has already been made. They are writing up the paper right now.
Monica: Why not?
Chandler: Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
Monica: God works in mysterious ways.
Monica: But she liked us.
Chandler: She likes Doctor Chandler and Reverend Monica.
Monica: (Almost crying) Please.. please, we are so close.
Monica: It's too late for apologies.
Monica: (sniffing) Maybe she will. Uh! Why couldn't I have been a Reverend?
Monica: (She gives Joey a you-are-so-stupid-look) Ok, ten.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning. Chandler is sitting and staring at his phone. Monica enters and creeps up next to Chandler.]
Phoebe: Just pretend they're not even here! It's OK Monica, when that spotlight hits you it so bright you won't see anyoneanyway.
Janice: Well, let's go to a bad one and make out. (they start to kiss and lean back into Monica.)
[Scene: Bill and Colleen's apartment. Chandler and Monica enter.]
MONICA: Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.
Monica: I can't believe it! (pause) I lost!
Monica: (pointing to a picture on the table) I-Is... Is that a picture?
Monica: Look, doctor!
Monica: Yeah, but the important thing to know about us, is how much we would care for this little baby. (holds up the sonogram)
Chandler: Well, our names really are Monica and Chandler. We're from New York.
(Monica does a fake laugh. For the laughs, you'll have to see the episode. I can't describe them.)
Monica: But we were hoping that since we told you the truth that you still might consider...
Joey: No-no! No! I mean it's gonna be all smelling like Monica!
Monica: I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeans and I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comes back I will find it and show you that stain!
Monica: God bless you Chandler Bing!
Monica: I would get a room with this cake. I think I could show this cake a good time!
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry honey, you know, but when she said "sex" I wasn't thinking about "sex with you"!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around the kitchen table as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica sits on the couch and Phoebe is pacing up and down the room.]
[Scene: A Street, Chandler and Monica are walking down the sidewalk after his office holiday party.]
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Chandler enters the door.]
Monica: Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minute there I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!"
Monica: Nancy doesn’t smoke!
Monica: So? What do you think of the house?
Monica: So? Do you think we should get it?
Monica: Hey! You smell like perfume and cigarettes.
Monica: Don’t you love the huge yard?
Monica: Wait a minute, you stayed home all day and played Ms. Pac-Man while I went off to work like some kind of chump?!
Monica: I think we should.
Monica: Okay. Right. Oh my God that is gonna be so hard.
Monica: This is huge!
Monica: How bad you wanna smoke, right now.
Monica: No, he’s picking up dinner, why, what’s up?
Monica: What?
Monica (puzzled): All right...
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?
Monica: Phoebe, relax none of that stuff ever happens! They just put it on there for legal reasons!
(Joey walks in and sees Monica. He freaks out and runs back into the hallway, screaming.)
Monica: (turns to them) Ok, alright, you guys, you'd better sit down, this is pretty big.
Monica: We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there. (Points to Rachel and Phoebe) It is beautiful, isn't it?
Monica: And about an hour ago, we made an offer.
Joey: All right. Okay. You and Monica, friends for a long time, and sure there are rules, but then you went to London. Oh, no, but thats different. I mean, there are rules there, too! You know what I mean?
Monica: I know! Hey, you havent been practising the routine, have you?
Monica: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...
Rachel: Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
Chandler: Okay before we start the celebration, Monica has to go put on her party dress.
Monica: Every year.
Monica: Technicality!
Monica: Deal!
Monica: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Monica: Maurice.
Monica: That’s not even a word!
Phoebe: And how none of it matters when the people really love each other. (Chandler and Monica kiss.) And how people will believe anything you tell them as long as its a compliment.
Monica: (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Chandler: Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
Monica and Rachel: What?!
Monica: When I take a shower, she leaves me little notes on the mirror.
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: She really left.
Monica: And?
Monica: Well, there you go.
(Chandler and Monica hug)
Monica: We can't afford that.
Monica: What?
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Yeah, we'll be okay.
Ross: Love you guys. (he kisses Monica, he, Rachel and Phoebe leave.)
Phoebe: (to Monica) You're gonna be okay?
Monica: We sure are.
Monica: And a baby...
Monica: Hey, see that snippy guy over there? Hes the one who decides who gets up on the platform. We should go dance by him.
Monica: Oh my God! My God! We've got the house !?
Monica: Rachel, this is yours.
Monica: I know.
Monica: All right, everybody open them!
Monica: Enjoy!
Monica: Hey, let me tell them!