words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planets most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. Shes the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.
Monica: Im fine.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Monica: Oh Uh
[Cut to Monica and Chandlers just after Monica has finished telling Chandler what happened.]
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Monica: Well, she actually has a boyfriend yknow herself, named Clark. Uh, she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
Monica: Huh?
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Monica: Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Monica: Really?
Monica: So-so you wouldve just lied?
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Monica: Good, so do it Saturday night because were going to dinner with her and Clark.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Monica: He might still show up.
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: Its actually going to be just family.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Monica: Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
Monica: Well just well just let her stay.
Monica: Kinda like your Barca lounger.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Monica: Joey's gonna be *so* upset.
Monica: Seriously, you don't think we should tell him?
Monica: Well, because every time we do, you make jokes about swinging and scare them away.
Monica: What if he reads it in the paper?
Rachel: Oh, big glamour night. Me and Monica at Laundorama.
Monica: Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?
Monica: Thanks.
Erica: No, he's in prison. (More shocked looks from Monica and Chandler)
Monica: Love it!
Monica: Well Im not sure yet, but umm of the top of my head Im thinking double sided tape and some sort of luncheon meat.
Chandler (to Monica): Sure.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang is there including Janice, theyre watching Happy Days.]
(Chandler and Monica are speechless).
Phoebe: I dont know! (frantically points at Monica)
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Everyone is helping clean the table.]
Monica: This dinner is gonna be so great! In your face, last year "me"!
Chandler: (To Monica and with bulging eyes) Why!?
Monica: No, actually, we're buying the house next door. (Janice gasps)
Monica: (looks confused and scared) I don't know why.
Monica: Oh, who cares, they still love me! "I am so excited..."
Monica: But we love our house.
Monica: Olivia? I thought she was marrying Connor! (pause) Oh right, real life more important.
(Chandler turns to look at Monica, who has the biggest hair ever, is flushed and in a sweat, and is decidedly sniffing her armpits)
Monica: Okay, you come up with an idea.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One Where The Monkey Gets Away, Rachel is watching a soap opera with Marcel.]
Monica: Mira, Ross, Marcel se llevo el control remoto. (Look, Ross, Marcel's got the remote.)
Monica: This is different! Greg and Jenny are in a relationship.
Monica: Oh, yeah, right! And after I took a shower this morning I just threw my towel on the floor! Oh God, it hurts to even joke about it.
(Chandler and Monica enter the room)
Monica: Hey, Rach, you're leaving tomorrow, shouldn't you be packing?
Monica: Oh my God! I have nothing left to teach you! (they hug)
Monica: Here, let me help you. (they both start opening boxes)
Monica: (looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.
Monica: You don't mind me touching your belly, do you?
Monica (to Ross): Okay, well, stop staring at them.
Monica: (walking around with her headset still on) OK LET'S GET THESE CHAIRS OUT HERE! Gunther, hit the Christmas lights. (He does so and the lights above the chairs light up. Monica looks satisfied) Okay, who left the ice sculpture (picks up a piece of ice from the ground) ON THE STEAM GRATE? (nobody answers)
Monica: From?
Monica (enters the room): Are, are you kidding? This is packing?
Chandler: I didn't know Monica had these!
Monica: Hey! Where's Mike?
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: Come here, I'll make you a drink.
Monica: Ok, you're being wierd. Do you want sex or did you do something bad?
Rachel: Ok. Monica?
Monica: Yeah?
Monica: Sure.
Monica: No.
Monica: Rachel used to live in that room.
Monica: What?
Monica: That is so sweet. (they hug)
[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone's sitting on the couch.Monica and Chandler enter]
Rachel: Well, these aren't mine. Maybe Monica used to use them with...
Monica: This is not, what I�m wearing. I�m ovulating and Chandler�s gonna be home any minute, so I thought we would try before dinner.
Monica: This is so great! Now we can enter into doubles tournaments!
Monica: Okay, I've had it with the hair jokes. Tomorrow morning, before we leave, I'm going to the salon.
Monica: You cried yesterday at the six o'clock news.
Chandler: (to Monica) Is it okay that I want you to wear that head set in bed tonight?
Monica: (to Ross) So, I guess you're next. You're ready?
Monica: Yeah. Mine too.
MONICA: Why, it's dinner for six. 5 steaks, and an eggplant for Phoebe.
Monica: (in a sexy voice) Hello, Chandler. (Phoebe has a huge smile on her face.)
Monica: Wait a minute, why dont you just call Mark. (they both look up in shock) I mean, who says you have to sit here and wait for him, youve got to make stuff happen.
Monica: I hope Ross isn't too upset.
Monica: Uh, where do you think you're going?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. The others are still there.]
Monica: Oh no! You and Phoebe are gonna help me in here.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler enters. Rachel and monica are seated at the table.]
Monica: You did? How?
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Monica: Nana liked it rough!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Chandler is watching TV and Monica is cooking]
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Monica: Okay, okay... Okay, I feel a little better.
Monica: Oh... Yes, I'm sure. Oh honey, let's go. Okay bye everyone.
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hate having to lie to Rachel!
Monica: What?
Monica: What kind of social situation are you comfortable with?
Monica: To use the bathroom.
Monica: Breathe, breathe, breathe... Good.
Monica: Alright, I'll be right back.
Monica: You'll be fine. Nah, you won't, but I'll be back in two minutes.
[Scene: The beach house, its still raining. Chandler is building a sand castle, Rachel is doing Monicas nails, and theyre all drinking margaritas, obviously bored.]
Rachel: (to Monica and Phoebe) Have I been living with him for too long, or did that all just make sense?
Monica: All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
Monica: Okay, now this one is rare, this one is medium well! Now go-go-go! (Phoebe enters) Hey Phoebe!
(Monica gives Chandler a look.)
Monica: It's just a little bit more, honey.
Monica: Oh, you did it!
Monica: Chandler, you don't wanna miss this. This is the birth of your child! It's the miracle of life!
Monica: It's a... It's a boy!
Amanda: (To Monica) Hello!
Monica: So, howd the lasagne go over? (listens) Really?! Good. So you owe me three pretty things. (listens) Yeah, Ive been thinking a lot about you too. (listens) I know. Its hard this whole platonic thing. (listens) Its a word!
Monica: (To Erica) Oh my God, he's beautiful. Thank you so much.
(Monica looks at him.)
Monica: So the wedding caterer sent me this list of twelve appetizers and I have to narrow it down to six.
Monica: I... I'm sorry, who should be along in a what now?