words in movies
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Monica: (to the lobster) Lucky bastard! (Throws the lobster in and turns around to face the planets most annoying woman, next to Dr. Laura and Kathy Lee Gifford of course. Shes the most annoying female TV character however.) Janice.
Monica: Im fine.
Janice: (notices Monicas engagement ring) Ohh! What is that on your finger?! Im blind!
Monica: Oh Uh
[Cut to Monica and Chandlers just after Monica has finished telling Chandler what happened.]
Monica: Well, she saw the ring.
Monica: Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were most people.
Monica: Well, she actually has a boyfriend yknow herself, named Clark. Uh, she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
Monica: Huh?
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
Monica: Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either is she?!
Monica: Really?
Monica: So-so you wouldve just lied?
Monica: Would it really have been that easy?
Monica: Good, so do it Saturday night because were going to dinner with her and Clark.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Chandler are on their date with Janice and Clark, however Clark is a no show and Janice is crying the Mississippi River about it.]
Monica: He might still show up.
Monica: Is that all?
Monica: Its actually going to be just family.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Monica: What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (To Monica) Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
Monica: Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Monica: Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
Monica: Well just well just let her stay.
Monica: Kinda like your Barca lounger.
Monica: I never stop thinking about it.
Chandler: Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. Now Monica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
Monica: Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
Monica: Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cant stay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
Monica: I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but you can.
Janice: Oh my Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go. (Starts for the door.) Good-bye Monica (hugs her), I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him. Chandler, (hugs him) you call me when this goes in the pooper. (Hurries out.)
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
Monica: Yeah, you have to go fight for her!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about trying to give Joey some money.]
Chandler: Come on Monica, its our Valentines Day. Please? Please-please, please?
Monica: Thank you.
Monica:: sweetie it's ok, I still love you, let me be a part of this.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Yes.
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on the couch still doing the crossword. Chandler is in the kitchen.]
Monica: (to Phoebe) Oh my God! Did you hear that? She hired me because she thinks Im good.
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi, remember us?
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Monica: (as Rachel) I am. I'm that stupid. (Little laugh.)
Monica: What's goin' on?
Monica: (as Rachel) Monica.
Rachel and Monica: Oh, thank you.
Rachel: (as Monica) Oh.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi.
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi.
Monica: Michael.
Monica: We didnt give you any money! (Chandler is motioning, "No!")
(Rachel slams shut her window and storms into the living room, where Joey and Monica are eating breakfast.)
Fake Monica: I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did you know I was here?
Chandler: (To Monica) Happy New Year!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there. Monica is just finishing cleaning the windows.]
Monica: Is it better than the other salmon mousse?
Monica: But, you see, it's just... this night has to go just perfect, you know? And, well, Wendy's more of a... professional waitress.
Monica: We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms.
Monica: Oh, look, he's waking up!
Monica: Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; they dont like us do they? (They gave them a pok-a-dotted punch bowl.)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Joey is talking to Monica and Chandler.]
Monica: Hey, guys.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Joey is holding a deck of cards out to Chandler.]
MONICA: Ok, everybody, there's food and drinks on the table. Go across the hall.
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Monica: What?
Dr. Rosen: So, Monica, how's the ankle?
Monica: I cant believe mom and dad are selling the house!
MONICA: I've gotta get back in the game.
Monica: Hell no, we'll pay!
Monica: Well, you're... you're different funny... I mean, you're... you're more sarcastic a-a-and... well, he does... bits... and impressions... and... and limericks...
Phoebe: OK, Monica? I had another answer all ready.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are eating breakfast as Joey enters.]
Monica: Ugly Naked Guy's laying kitchen tile. Eww!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe are there.]
Monica: Lots of responses.
Monica: What?
Monica: Oh, Rachel!
Monica: (Runs out to the hallway) Chandler, wait. It goes: Old job, (Raises her hand) new job, (Raises her hand really high) you. This is just something I have to do.
Monica: You're kidding! Where? Where?
Monica: What?
Monica: Please! I am not as bad as Ross.
Monica: Yeah, I know. He can get really competitive.
Monica: Really?
Monica: Well, what's the job?
Monica: I don't think so.
Monica: Yeah.
Richard: Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want. (Pause) Ten, even twenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. (Monica leaves.)
Monica: Well, are you asleep right now, Joe? Cause I dont think you have to wear it unless you are!
Monica: Do you want to go to the bathroom, or do you wanna play poker?
Monica: Excuse me, where are you going?
Monica: Uhh, not much. Uh, work's good.
Monica: Me too.
RACHEL: Hey Chandler. Monica just broke my seashell lamp.
Phoebe: Monica, in or out?
Monica: Hey that reminds me, I thought we could use some extra luck so I brought a wishbone home from work.
Rachel: Hey, honey! Whats the matter? (Monica shows her, her hat.) Fine, I was just trying to be nice! Whoa!
Monica: Great! Its so amazing! I mean, last time Dr. Roger came over, I was so nervous, but then after being with you Im all like, "Can the doctor see me now?"
Monica: Sorry, Rach.
Monica: Okay, Rachel, you wanna put the marshmallows in concentric circles.
Monica: Alright, check.
(Monica gets up, looks in Rachel's purse.)
Monica: Rachel, there's nothing in it.
FRIEND: She's probably not even very pretty, just young enough so that everything is still pointing up. [Monica folds her arms over her breasts]
(Monica gets Rachel her purse.)
Rachel: (to Monica): Thank you. (to Ross): I saw your twenty-five, and I raise you... seven.
Monica: That, you get? That, you get?
(Monica sits, Rachel gets up.)
(Monica glares at Phoebe.)
Monica: Barry who you almost...?
Monica: What is it?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Wonderful!
Monica: Oh, hang on, hang on. Does Aunt Monica get a say in this?
Monica: There was nudity!
[Scene: outside Phoebe's apartment, Monica is knocking on the door.]
[Scene: The Janitors Closet, Chandler and Monica are trying to figure out what to do now.]
Monica: G'bye, Nana. (She kisses her on the forehead.)
(Decided that they are less than human as well, Chandler picks up a golf club and Monica a frying pan, to join in on the fun of beating their good friend to within an inch of his life!)
Monica: (gasps) We had a characturist!
Monica: Y'know, so I don't read as many important books as you do, and I don't write trick poems that seem to be about one thing but are actually about something else. And y'know what, I get excited about stupid stuff, like when I my People magazine comes on Saturday, and the new Hold Everything catalog. Y'know but that does not mean that I'm empty, I care about things. I care about my friends and family. You have no right to make that kind of judgment about me.
Monica: Which ones?
Estelle: Ooh, what a shame! Because with her face (points to Monica) and her chest (points to Rachel) I could really put something together.
(Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.)
Monica: No!
Monica: Well, can't you just have the party when we get back?