words in movies
(Monica enters.)
Monica: Hey. Ross, did you know Mom and Dad are going to Puerto Rico for Thanksgiving?
Monica: Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.
Monica: I am not wrong.
Monica: No, I just talked to them.
Monica: Oh, wow, so you're gonna be one of those "healthy, healthy, healthy guys"?
Ross: (to Monica) Well, you were right. How can they do this to us, huh? It's Thanksgiving.
Monica: Ok, I'll tell you what. How about I cook dinner at my place? I'll make it just like Mom's.
Monica: You know, they're not actually supposed to have... (Ross looks at her sheepishly) I'll work on the lumps. Joey, you're going home, right?
Monica: And I assume, Chandler, you are still boycotting all the pilgrim holidays.
Monica: Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma?
Monica: So you're free Thursday, then.
Monica: Yeah. Rach, are you thinking you're gonna make it to Vail?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there but Rachel.]
Monica: Hey, Rach, did you make your money?
Monica: Rach, here's your mail.
Monica: (insistently) No, here's your mail.
Monica: (gives her an envelope) Would you just open it?
Monica: We all chipped in.
Joey: (to Monica) We did?
Monica: (to Joey) You owe me 20 bucks.
Monica: (hands Chandler a bag) Chandler, here you go, got your traditional Thanksgiving feast, you got your tomato soup, your grilled cheese fixin's, and your family size bag of Funyuns.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey enters, upset.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is cooking Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is standing in the doorway, not wanting to participate in the festivities.]
Monica: Mmm, looking good. Ok, cider's mulling, turkey's turking, yams are yamming. (notices Ross is depressed) What?
Monica: All right, that's it. You know what? Just get out of my way and stop moping.
Joey: Hey, Monica, I got a question. I don't see any tater tots.
Monica: That's not a question.
Monica: All right, fine. Tonight's potatoes will be both mashed with lumps, and in the form of tots.
(Ross grabs for some food, Monica slaps his hand away.)
Monica: Ah!
Monica: What, Phoebe, did you whip the potatoes? Ross needs lumps!
Monica: Why would we do that?
Monica: Ok, three kinds of potatoes coming up.
Monica: Got the keys? or Got the keys!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the group is coming back from the roof.]
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Monica: No I don't.
Monica: No I didn't. I asked, "got the ke-eys?"
Monica: (panicked) The oven is on.
Monica: Well then get it, get it!
Monica: (angry) Joey!
Monica: Can you go any faster with that?
Monica: Why do you guys have so many keys in there anyway?
Monica: I swear you said you had the keys.
Monica: Why would I have the keys?
Monica: But I didn't.
Monica: Why?
Monica: Why?
Monica: Why? Because everything is my responsibility? Isn't it enough that I'm making Thanksgiving dinner for everyone? You know, everyone wants a different kind of potatoes, so I'm making different kinds of potatoes. Does anybody care what kind of potatoes I want? Nooooo, no, no! (starting to cry) Just as long as Phoebe gets her peas and onions, and Mario gets his tots, and it's my first Thanksgiving, and it's all burned, and, and I... I...
Chandler: Ok, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so, look, the door's open. Here we go.
Monica: Well, the turkey's burnt. (checking pots) Potatoes are ruined, potatoes are ruined, potatoes are ruined.
Monica: No, it doesn't, does it? But you wanted lumps, Ross? (picks up the pan of badly burnt potatoes) Well, here you go, buddy, ya got one.
Monica: Oh, really? So why was I busting my ass to make this delicious Thanksgiving dinner?
Monica: Stop it, stop it, stop it!
Monica: Ooh, Ugly Naked Dancing!
Monica: (holding sandwich) Does anybody wanna split this with me?
Monica: Make a wish?
Monica: I need more swordfish. (to one of the assistant chefs) Can you get me some more swordfish?
Monica: All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys.
Chandler: Where's Monica?! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Is she here?
Monica: Oh, we're not doing that. Okay
Monica: And ice!
Monica: (Thinks) Cups.
Fat Monica: Ross! (Wanting to be introduced.)
(Joey and Monica look at each other and shrug. Ross enters with Marcel on his shoulder)
Joey: Well, it involved Monica.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is desperately trying to make his Valentines Day gift. He takes a paper cup, turns it upside down, sticks two pencils into the top, and hangs a coat hanger from the bottom.]
Monica: Were just two people who find each other very attractive. Right?
Monica: Hello Dan! I'm really looking forward to Saturday night! Really, really!
Monica: You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!
Chandler: Guys? (They ignore him.) Ive got something important to tell ya. (Still nothing so he walks over and stands in front of the TV.) Guys? (They lean over to try and watch the TV, Chandler mimics them.) Guys?! (Pause) Im gonna ask Monica to marry me.
Phoebe: Yeah. (Looks.) Oh, thats gone too. This is Monicas bathroom right?!
Monica: (To Rachel) How did work go?
Monica: You stink!
Monica: Phoebe knows and she's just trying to freak us out! That's the only explanation for it!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is greeting her Father for their brunch.]
Ross: I just grabbed a spoon. (Ross exits and Monica has no idea what that means.)
Monica: He probably wants you back because you're right for the job.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is buying a muffin as Chandler runs in.]
Monica: All right, let me see. (She grabs the 8 ball.) Will Chandler have sex tonight? (Reads the answer.) Don't count on it. Seems like it works to me.
Monica: Theyre kissing lets just go around them.
Chandler: Monica, that was also true an hour ago! I mean, please, look at you! Your hand is blistered, you can barely stand, your hair is inexplicable! Ok, you've already proven you are just as good as he is, now we've missed our dinner reservations, so now let's just go upstairs, order room service, take a shower and shave your head!
Monica: You sat back and let him have her, you didnt fight at all. Am I right? Do you want the same thing to happen with Emily?
Monica: That's the surprise!
Monica: (overlapping) Let her finish, doctor.
Monica: Y'know go! Go! Right there! (Points)
Rachel: That's fine. So Monica, you are now in control of my love life.
[Cut to the living room where Monica is helping pack a box.]
Phoebe: Yeah well, that's 'cause Monica put me in charge of cups and ice, and Monica is gonna rue the day that she put me in charge of cups and ice.
Monica: (jumping in front of him) No-no! Don't do it! Don't!
MONICA: Ok, we're not having birthday cake, we're having birthday flan.
Monica: All right fine, your guy may have a great body, but our guy is really funny.
[Scene: The park, its dark outside and Monica and Ross are still fighting over the ball.]
Monica: Well, next time your massaging him, you should try and distract yourself.
MONICA: One hour? You are such a leaf blower.
Monica: Is that the one that speaks English or the one that doesn't?
Monica: 'Cause, Gary and Phoebe think they're a hotter couple than we are!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, late at night Monica is still examining her bill as Rachel emerges from her room.]
Monica: Chip, is Chip Matthews.
Monica: Great!
Monica: (runs over to Phoebe) You have got to go home!
Monica: No, I'm-I'm serious!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is trying to explain himself to Monica.]
Monica: This bottle opener. (She grabs it off of the freezer door.)
Monica: A Magic Eight ball?! You can't be serious, you can't make this decision with a toy!
Monica: Because! You could get to live out my fantasy!
Monica: What's goin' on?
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Monica: Please ... if I win the lottery, you guys are not gonna leave me. Someone gave me a basket of mini-muffins last week and I couldn't get rid of you for 3 days!
(Monica and Rachel begin to read from the script.)
Monica: Hey, Joey's ass! What are you doing?
Monica: What?
Monica: (coming back to the stage and sitting next to Chandler) Okay, Ive got some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
Monica: Oh, yes, umm, Im here to pick up a dress that you have on hold.
Monica: No you didn't.
Monica: Which we are, and-and we already paid for it. Its My Giant!
Monica: Yeah, it's good.
[Cut to Chandler and Monica on the couch.]
Chandler: Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
Monica: Well that's pathetic!
Monica: Oh wait, Joey, you cant go like that! You stink!
Monica: No way!
Monica: Go on, teach me something about men and women.
Phoebe: All right well, we're just gonna have to tell Monica, that's all.
Monica: Yeah, what is it?
Monica: Look at you! Come here! (They hug.) Feel better?
Monica: You are insane! You-you gotta give this up!
Monica: Dont worry Phoebe, youre gonna meet someone. If I can meet a great guy, so can you.
Monica: Yes!
Mischa: (to Monica) I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany me to the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
Richard: The bedroom. Well its pretty much your typical... (opens the door as Monica hides under the covers, and quickly closes the door before his date can see the room.) bedroom.
(Chandler tries to take it, but Monica wont let go. He tugs harder, and she still doesnt budge.)
Phoebe: Oh, in that case(hops up and down in joy)Yay! (Monica looks confused) That was me hopping on board.
[Cut to Chandler trying to hint to Monica that he wanted to move in with her in The One After Vegas.]
Joey: (to Monica) Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?
Monica: I don't know. I mean, you saw him do a love scene, so maybe you don't have a thing for Joey, maybe you have a thing for Drake.
MONICA: Aren't you afraid that Joey's going to figure all of this out?� (pause)� I heard it.
Chandler: (To Monica) Hey!
Monica: Hi!
Monica: What about these? These look the same?
Monica: Not as each other!
Monica: Yeah.
Monica: Hey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Joey, and Monica are sitting on the couch as Ross is up getting some coffee.]
Monica: You can also find him under umm, dog and dead.
Monica: They're all in there! Even these five that I hid in my bra (takes some tickets out of her bra and gives them to Phoebe)...
Monica: Yeah. I guess. (She puts more money in the bucket.)
Monica: Hes retiling my floor. (they both run to the bathroom)
Phoebe: God, what a mess. (She grabs the bowl and heads for Monicas.)
Joey: Are you thinking about Monica?
Monica: (on the answering machine) Rach! It's me! Pick up!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Ohh, Im such an idiot. I cant believe I actually thought she could change.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Courtney and Matthew are getting ready to do a scene where Monicas sick.]
Monica: (does Rachel's) Nooo!
Monica: Relax, Ross. She's not made of ice cream!
Monica: Wouldn't kick her out of bed. No more Vodka for me! (put her glass down)