words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Monica: (inspecting his leg) Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a tough spot.
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
Monica: We are! Help us!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Monica: Joey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Monica: I know.
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Ross: (in a stupor) Hey Chandler. (Sees Monica.) Monica!
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Monica: Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Oh no!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Monica: Yes it's true.
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
Monica: I guess I wanted to keep it (Pause) as a souvenir.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Joey: No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has been trying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
A Female Student: Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
Monica: (to a customer) Pete, can I get you something else?
Monica: Yeah, but her plane got delayed in Athens. But actually, (Checks watch) she should be here by now.
Monica: Wait, what that place, that pub he took us too?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is showing off her new dollhouse. Its a huge dollhouse, that takes up the entire living room table.]
Monica: Oh no, it is okay, I mean as long as you know that Chandler and I are also very hot and fiery, just as hot as you! I mean our flame, whew, is on fire!
Monica: I'll do it!
Monica: Hey. It's him. (On the intercom) Who is it?
Monica: Oh my God. Youre even dumber than I am!
Mischa: (to Monica) Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time in three years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would let me enjoy that, no!! (to Sergei) You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English, Sergei?
Monica: (Awkwardly.) Why would I care where Chandler is? You know uhh...You know sometimes I dont even like Chandler.
Monica: What took you so long?
Monica: What happened?
Monica: Oh, good.
Monica: I still don't get why Greg and Jenny would give us a fake number.
Rachel: Okay, but Monica, what if- what if it doesn't come together?
MONICA: Ok, you see, the tag shouldn't be at the top left corner, it should be at the bottom right corner.
Chandler: Monica and I almost got married last night.
Monica: Rachel! Let me in! Rachel!
Monica: I make the decisions, and I say no.
Monica: I really need to talk to you.
Monica: Rachel!! Come on! Let me in!
Monica: Rachel locked the door.
Monica: Why? Do you think hes still mad at us?
Monica: Please!
Monica: Joey, I'm in!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters.]
Monica: I mean I-I thought you were nuts at first, but you-you did it. And now you can just look back at this thing with no regrets.
[Flashback to Chandlers thirtieth birthday party. It is also being held in Monica and his apartment. He is about to blow out the candles on his birthday cake.]
Monica: Come on Rach, let's go.
Monica: (Gasps) What?!! You cannot tell him that!!
Monica: Oh my God! You're water broke!
Monica: Do you know anything about women?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is putting away the wedding dress, finally.]
Monica: That's all right.
Tim: Wow! Umm, okay. Umm (To Phoebe) I-I-I realize I came on a little strong but, its only because I think youre so amazing. (To Monica) And uh, I-I just wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here because Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway (Starts to leave and Phoebe and Monica trade looks.)
Monica: What?
Fat Monica: Hi, I'm Ross's little sister.
Monica: That's what it sounded like.
[Scene: The waiting room, Monica and Joey are sitting there.]
Monica: Well, if you want, you can stay with Rachel and me tonight.
Monica: (impatiently) Now?
Monica: Umm, why don't you give me something that would be a good reason and-and then I'll tell you if it's true.
Monica: Harder than it sounds. Isn't it?
Ross: Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
Monica: (looking through the peephole) It's Danny.
(Monica enters behind them.)
Monica: How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh? You think its funny now?
Monica: (singing) "I'm a little bit country"...
(Monica suddenly gets very happy.)
Monica: Yknow, in my defense, umm there was no glitter on the macaroni and very little glue.
Monica: Oh, would you let it go already?! Youre fine!
Monica: Me too.
Monica: My God! Chandler, we said be 'aloof' not 'a doof'.
Monica: (To Phoebe) How are you doing?
Monica: (entering with Chandler) Hey!
Monica: Chandler!
Monica: So, why wait 'til Saturday, are you free tomorrow?
Monica: Oh, great!
Monica: Oh no-no-no, stay, stay, stay, just keep talking. Im always the hostess.
Monica: (to Danny) We'll be right there! (To Rachel) Can't you just say it starts later?
Monica: We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)
Dan: Uh, bye Monica.
(Ross grabs for some food, Monica slaps his hand away.)
Monica: Chandler! You don't have to ask for my permission. (Quietly) You can go.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is mopping around and eating ice cream.]
Monica: (from the hallway) I do not like that woman!
Monica: Yeah, and in the long version, I dump him for telling people the short version.
Monica: Great!
Monica: I think you're better than you think you are.
Monica: (interrupting) Know when to stop.
Monica: I think you're my favorite.
Mrs. Geller: (holding two pies) Monica, why don't you finish off these pies? I don't have any more room left in the fridge.
Ross: (on phone) Uh, hello dad! Monica and I just saw the house in the paper! (Listens) Yes were surprised! (Listens) Who did you leave a message with?
Monica: Uh-huh, that one!
Monica: Oh, shes gonna love that!
Monica: What is it hon?
Monica: (Panicking) Okay, umm, okay, umm (Rachel opens the door.) It's just Joey and Ross.
Monica: Ive been doing a lot of thinking. A lot! And umm, well, I came up with a whole bunch of businesses you can do with your van. Okay umm, you could be flower delivery person.
Pete: Uh, absolutely, yeah, sEnd her in. (Monica enters) Hi.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Phoebe, Chandler, Ross, and Monica are eating breakfast.]
Monica: Oh that's great!
Monica: Absolutely! It would just be one friend (Points at Chandler) helping out another friend. (Points at herself.)
Fat Monica: No. No, thank you!
Monica: Oh, great! Just what you want for a new house with infants. Bird feces.
Monica: Ok, here we go. We need to sort out the tickets as quickly as possible to see if we've won. So does anybody have any ideas how to organize this? (doesn't let them answer) Ok, how about this: we divide them into 6 groups of 40, and the remaining 10 can be read by whoever finishes their pile first.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Chandler: Really?! That's what you heard? (To Monica) You said that?
Monica: What?!
Monica: Maybe I do! Im pretty feisty! (She blows the signal.)
Monica: That's great!
Monica: Hey!
Joey: I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. I'm just happy I'm keeping it down, y'know?
Monica: Okay. (Opens the fridge.) All right, turkey. Eh, that wont work. Cheese? (Picks it up) That wont work. Olive loaf? (Picks it up) I hope that wont work.
Monica: Yeah, yknow, but something like salmon which would be so much more elegant than the chicken. And, you wouldnt have to worry about the salmonella. (Ross pushes her.) So, I cant wait to see this place youre getting married!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.]
Monica: Sure!
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
Monica: Oh my God, the cat's made my eyes water! Don't-don't throw it to me! My vision's been compromised!! (Quickly grabs a tissue to wipe her eyes.) Oh God! Okay. Okay. It's okay. Man, that was close.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, back to the present day.]