words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Monica: (inspecting his leg) Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a tough spot.
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
Monica: We are! Help us!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Monica: Joey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Monica: I know.
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Ross: (in a stupor) Hey Chandler. (Sees Monica.) Monica!
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Monica: Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Oh no!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Monica: Yes it's true.
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
Monica: I guess I wanted to keep it (Pause) as a souvenir.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Joey: No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has been trying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
A Female Student: Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
Monica: So, do you want me to watch Ben for you?
Monica: See Chandler? Im getting a lot of use out of them already! Theyre very practical. See, you can wear them with dresses, with skirts, with pants
Monica: (on phone) Okay, great! Bye. (Hangs up as Chandler enters.) So guess whos coming to Thanksgiving dinner?
Monica: Okay.
Monica: No were not.
Monica: I got it!
Rachel: Hi! So Im out having lunch at Monicas and this guy starts talking to me, and it turns out he works for a buyer at Bloomingdales and there happens to be an opening in his department. So I gave him my phone number and hes gonna call me this weekend to see if he can get me an interview!
Monica: Youre not dressed yet?! Were supposed to start having fun in 15 minutes!
Monica: Give it. Give it.
Monica and Rachel: Oh!!
Monica: A hat! Yes! We need a hat.
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
Monica: Phoebe, Sandras mad at you too. It-it doesnt bother you?
Monica: So, Ill get-get back to my friend.
Monica: (seeing her) Okay, lets go!! Lets hit the road!!
MONICA: You heard the woman. Peel, chop, devil! I can't believe I lost 2 minutes.
Phoebe: We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time! (Others start to agree but she continues) OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
Chandler: I cant figure out what to make Monica.
Ben: Monica.
Ben: Monica bang!
Ben: Monica bang!
Monica: You okay?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the party continues with Rachel leaning on the counter as Gunther walks in carrying candy.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
MONICA: Yes, I will start with the carpaccio, and then I'll have the grilled prawns.
Monica: I dont believe this! Wow, look at this refrigerator! Its gigantic! I mean I could live in this thing! Id be cold, but Im always cold. Oh my God, look at these spider burners! I love spider burners.
Ben: Monica.
Monica: Oh, then it mustve been you. Bye. (leaves)
Ben: Monica bang!
MONICA: You can't be a lawyer. You're eight.
Monica: All right, we should call somebody.
Phoebe: Im, Im freaking out! Monica kinda trusted me with something and she shouldnt have! All right, I havent lived here in a while, so I have to ask you something. Does Monica still turn on the lights in her bedroom?
Monica: How are we gonna do that? Theres no way.
Phoebe: All right. We're gonna take Clunkers to Rosss. We'll be back in a minute. (Gets up with Monica to do so.)
Monica: (sliding into Joeys place on the couch to try and talk to Phoebe) Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. (gets up and joins Joey)
Monica: Yeah.
Ross: Monica did it?
Ross: Monica?
Monica: Really?!
Monica: No. Why?
(Monica runs into the kitchen from the terrace.)
Monica: Oh my god, Joey, for all we know this guy could be horribly...
(Monica and Phoebe look at each other and leave the apartment again)
Monica: How can you tell? You can only see the back of his head!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Chandler and Monica enter. Oh, and Joey is wearing a FDNY T-shirt to make this the first nod to the tragedy that Friends have made.]
Monica: And yet, were still poking him.
Monica: (Jumping up to make Rachel sit down) Okay, okay. I hate this.
Monica: Guys, you got your hair cut.
Monica: Did you make brownies today?
Monica and Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Every year.
Monica and Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Monica: (shouting) Once!!
Monica: Phoebe.
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Huddle up.
Monica: Score!! 7 to nothing!
Monica: Break.
Monica: Okay, Phoebe you know what youre doing right?
MONICA: Chandler could you at least send some women to my party? [buzzer goes off] Alright that's Ross.
Monica: Losers walk!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are in Monica's bedroom.]
[cut to Ross and Monica.]
(Monica enters, wearing a walkman, so she doesn't hear what the others say)
Monica: Wow, what?
Monica: Pulling what? Its second down.
Monica: No its not, its second.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Ross is on the phone.]
CHANDLER: Yeah, Ross can't go so it's between my friend Eric Prower who has breath issues and Dan with the poking. [starts poking Monica in the shoulder] 'Did you see that play? Do you want some more beer? Is that Spike Lee?'
Monica: Run, Phoebe, run!
Monica: Does so count!
Monica: After the snap!
[cut to Monica and Rachels.]
Monica: Because the winner gets this!
Monica: No its not! You want it, youre gonna have to win it!
Monica: Break!
Monica: I don't know what else to say.
Monica: Were sorry honey.
MONICA: Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.
Phoebe: Monica, Monica, you know what gets out hummus.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are eating breakfast as Joey enters, very happily.]
Monica: Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!
Monica: All right then.
Ross: Fine, fine, Rachel your with Monica, Joey youre with me.
(We hear the guys start to attack him, but the guy manages to calm them down and gets them to agree to what he did. Monica throws up her hands in disgust.)
Rachel: I did!! I watched! I watched! I watched Monica bang his head against that thing!
[Scene: Their Building, Monica and Rachel are going to apologize to Danny. Rachel knocks on his door, which he opens and he has this really bushy beard and long hair. Picture Paul Bunyan.]
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
MONICA: No, no, not a party. Just a surprise gathering of some people Rachel knows. Um, this is Phoebe and Chandler and Joey.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is writing a letter by the bay window as Rachel enters.]
MONICA: Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.
Joey: No, I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid! (Notices Monica standing between them and smiling.) What?! (The camera clicks, taking another picture.)
Monica: Honey, theres a reason.
Monica: No! Im not okay!
Monica: Oh, well, I bought Chandler a five hundred dollar watch and he wrote me a rap song.
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence I'd never thought I'd say.
Monica: Break!