words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Monica: (inspecting his leg) Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a tough spot.
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
Monica: We are! Help us!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Monica: Joey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Monica: I know.
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Ross: (in a stupor) Hey Chandler. (Sees Monica.) Monica!
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Monica: Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Oh no!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Monica: Yes it's true.
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
Monica: I guess I wanted to keep it (Pause) as a souvenir.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Joey: No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has been trying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
A Female Student: Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
Rachel: Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (Monica opens the door.) Emily?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the ring he bought and not liking it.]
MONICA: I know, how can you not be accross the hall anymore.
Monica: So, we did okay at the strip club, right?
Monica: Come on! Chandler!
Monica: Really?!
Monica: Thats-thats not Phase Three.
Joey: Hey, Monica bought a bed from the Mattress King?
Monica: (to Phoebe) You know it's funny, the last time Paulo was here, my hair was so much shorter and cuter.
Monica: Oh, Chantal!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: (looking at Chandler sleeping with a balloon in his mouth) So sexy. (Waking him up.) Honey.
Monica: Wait, now, what am I doing again?
Monica: They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! How can you not care?
Monica: Hey, guys, guys, did you see my new, china cabinet?!
(Monica, Ross, Chandler, and Joey exit.)
Monica: Janice?!
Monica: How have you been?
MONICA: Fine, go have sex.
RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stock market.
Monica: Wow! And you got a petticure. Your feet are all dressed up.
Monica: (she enters with a headset on and she's speaking into the microphone) Well, it matters to me!
Monica: So, did you play in college? (She points to his NYU Soccer (football for the rest of the world) sweatshirt he's wearing.)
Monica: Done?
Phoebe: Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married. I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked. (Raises her glass and drinks.)
Phoebe: This is so cool, til Monica gets back, its like Im head chef and I get to make all the decisions. (She looks at the remaining butter, and then decides to add it to the dish.)
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
Ross: (to Monica) Well, you were right. How can they do this to us, huh? It's Thanksgiving.
JOEY: Monica, relax, go get a beer.
Monica: Used to work with her. Used to! Im a relative and I didnt get invited! A blood relative! Blood!!
Monica: Because your all gonna make up fake specials and make me cook them like you did the other night?
Monica: Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting one of those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, this cant be there.
Monica: Saucy!
Monica: Umm. (nodding her head, "Good.")
Monica: Well, it was the first time. Yknow, theres not always a lot of agreement the first time.
Monica: He asked you out?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's hotel room. They enter.]
Monica: I-I-I think you look great.
Monica: The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own for a while!
Phoebe: (pushing Monica back onto the couch) Its so inspired! Look at him! Look at him go!
Monica: Hi!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica enters with some mail.]
Monica: No-no-no, no!
(In the rooms next door, Joey, Rachel, Ross and Charlie stop kissing and try to understand what the yelling was about. After a while they continue kissing. We're back in Chandler and Monica's room. Monica has some of her own hair stuffed in her mouth by Chandler.)
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
Monica: Hi. About last night... I know you are under a lot of stress and even though the things you said hurt me a little bit... My point is, uh, well, I'm willing to take my job back.
Monica: Is anyone thankful for anything else besides a thong?
MONICA: Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
Monica: Thats because their nerves are probably deadened from being so stupid. But hey, y'know if you dont believe me, please, by my guest.
[Time lapse, Monica accidentally spilled her drink on Bob's shirt and is wiping it off. Joey is making eyes at Angela.]
Monica: Okay. (She does so and starts to walk towards Joey to receive her pancakes.)
Monica: Yeah, I talked to you on the phone, Im the lady that got stuck with the racecar bed.
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
Phoebe: I sang. (To Monica) Hah!
Mike: (disbelieving) I think I will be all right! (to Monica) You wanna volley a bit for a serve?
Ross: I found a note on my door, "Come to Monicas quick, bring champagne and a Three Musketeers bar."
Monica: (laughing harder) You know the words! You are so into this!
Monica: Wow. That is not a happy hi.
Monica: Okay, but wouldnt it be easier if you had to tell me something that you could tell me.
Monica: Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I am like totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. (hands them the poem)
Ross: (interrupting Monica and Emily) So we should probably get going soon.
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
Monica: You changed?
Monica: There it is. Joey, what are you doing?
Monica: We thought since Phoebe was staying over tonight we'd have kinda like a slumber party thing. We got some trashy magazines, we got cookie dough, we got Twister... (The phone rings and Monica answers it.)
Monica: Or Spin the Bottle?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the scene is continued from earlier.]
[Scene: A kitchen where Phoebe and Monica are finishing up a catering job]
Monica: All right, be my guest.
Joey and Monica: Are you all right?
Monica: He had to go, theres a deer just outside eating fruit from the orchard.
(Joey and Monica rush over to her.)
Monica: I think youre done.
[Cut to Monica and Rachels apartment, all are there.]
Monica: Ohh, everybody at the restaurant still hates me.
Chandler: Love her! That's right, I LOVE HER!!! I love her!! (They walk together and hug.) I love you, Monica.
RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
Monica: All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be able to focus?
Chandler: (To Monica) Now all you have to do is just get through a little bit more, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and dont talk to anyone.
Monica: Run, Marcel, run! Run, Marcel! (Marcel runs off and Luisa runs after him. Monica goes to check up on Phoebe) Are you okay?
[Scene: Allesandros, Monica is cooking.]
Monica: I think I need a drink.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Monica: Hi!
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Hi.
Monica: Oh. Why didnt you take her?
Monica: Do you love her?
Monica: You love her!
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Rachel is talking to Monica about her job.]
Monica: Oh good, Im glad thats catching on.
[Scene: Monica and Rachels, Joey is entering]
Monica: Where ya going?
Monica: And well, what did she say?
Monica: Oh, youre totally welcome! Whatd she say?
Monica: You know!
Monica: It is not over! Youre over!