words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Monica: (inspecting his leg) Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a tough spot.
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
Monica: We are! Help us!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Monica: Joey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Monica: I know.
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Ross: (in a stupor) Hey Chandler. (Sees Monica.) Monica!
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Monica: Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Oh no!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Monica: Yes it's true.
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
Monica: I guess I wanted to keep it (Pause) as a souvenir.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Joey: No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has been trying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
A Female Student: Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
MONICA: You know, the guys are probably having a great time.
Monica: Are you kidding me?! Is this; is this turning you on?
Monica: What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?
Monica: And everybody has to wear costumes. (And theres general disconcertment.) Come on! Itll be fun!
Monica: What? We took a walk, nothing happened. I can back with nothing all over me.
Monica: Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, what was I supposed to do?!
Monica: (crying) This is my favorite part.
Monica: Yeah youre right. I dont know what I was thinking.
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
Monica: Poor thing!
Monica: Where were your parents?
[Scene: at Barry and Mindy's reception, Monica and Richard are sitting at a table, and Monica is trying to throw a piece of candy into his mouth.]
Monica: Okay. Lets bring it in.
Richard: (approaching them with a woman in tow) Monica! Chandler!
Monica: Youre jealous of Princess Caroline?
Monica: Guys, whats going on?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, its 0-Dark:30, in other words its really, really early. Everyones asleep, and all through the apartments not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. That is except for the chick, who turns out to be a rooster and is crowing in the sun. Needless to say, this awakens Monica and Rachel who rush into their living room, searching for the cause of the sound.]
Monica: Okay, you stay here, and just wait by the phone. Spray Lysol in my shoe, and wait for Ross to kill you.
Monica: Thats Phoebe! Where did you get that?
(They walk into a completely redecorated and repainted room. And of course, the room is immaculate. Only an obsessive-compulsive like Monica could find fault with the room.)
Monica: Wh-what, why?
Monica: Yeah youre right, we cantwe shouldnt watch this.
Monica: Hold on a second! What is that on her ankle?
Monica: Well, shes not going to find them lying in the grass like that.
[Ross glares at Monica.]
Monica: Hey sweetie!
Monica: Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasnt even asked?!
Monica: Stop it!
RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the fattest man in the whole damn town?
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Monica: What is wrong with you?!!!
Monica: Cause if you do that means youd be cancelling it for me, and were just friends.
Monica: No you robot!!
Monica: Oh hi! Hi! Yknow, we were just talking about bacon.
Monica: I am good. I finished my book.
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: (hits him lightly) Oh!
Monica: Thats also like the tenth time you told us.
Ross: No, I just think Monica was that fat.
Monica: I dont remember. Do you wanna take a walk?
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are there. Phoebe enters carrying video tapes.]
Rachel: Ohh, of course Monicas brother!
Monica: Thanks.
Monica: Yes, but you are dead inside.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, she is frantically working and is handing two finished dishes to a waitress.]
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Bye.
Monica: Oh no! Whats the matter?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Chandler are entering carrying groceries and find Phoebe already there standing in front of a huge object that has been gift wrapped.]
Monica: Joey just hired Chandler to be his assistant!
Monica: Hey Phoebe! Guess what?
Monica: Hey!
[Time lapse. Monica is wearing the dress and starring at herself in the mirror.]
[Scene: later, Richard and Monica are dancing]
Monica: (getting up) Joey!
Chandler: No not okay, you cant look for Monicas presents!
Monica: Rach, hes a friend of ours.
Monica: No.
Monica: And I assume, Chandler, you are still boycotting all the pilgrim holidays.
Joey: (turning and whispering to Monica) Shes not crazy is she?
Monica: Ohhh! (Takes the plate.) No! This is my friend Rachel, we went to High School together.
Monica: (panicked) Oh wait! You didnt just sit on my Kit-Kats did you?!!
Phoebe: (yelling from Monicas room) No-no!! No!!
Monica: What?!
Monica: (laughs) You realize what you are dont you?
Monica: Youre his bitch.
Monica: Yes!!
Monica: Oh my God!
Ross: Wow, Monicas letting other people help decorate her tree! Did someone get her drunk again or?
Monica: Because you're on my team! And my team always wins!
Monica: Okay, I will. Remember that thing that we just discussed that you wanted to do?
Phoebe: Well, what am I going to tell Monica? She wants to wear them tonight!
Monica: Yeah! Shes right in there! (Points to Phoebes room.)
Monica: Sorry. So hows it going with Joey?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are eating.]
Monica: Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!
Monica: Hey! Continuing the countdown of your favorite meals. Tonight, No. 3, macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs.
Joey: All right! All right! Enough! Enough! Enough!! Enough! (To Chandler and Monica) You two go home! I-I-I gotta talk to Janine! (They start to leave.)
Monica: Ill get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) Im sorry, uh apparently Ive opened the door to the past.
Monica: Okay!!
MONICA: That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean this is, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet.
Monica: Phoebe! But I could take one of those little feet and put it in a pita pocket.
Monica: Its not mayonnaise!!
Monica: No, that is what the game is.
Monica: Yeah, a lot. A lot, a lot!
Monica: Well, youre not.
Rachel: Monica. Youve, youve done it right?
Monica: Yknow what? You are right?!
Monica: I don't know. Rachel I'm-I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.
Monica: Phoebe, why is smoke coming out of the bathroom?!
Monica: Put it out!!
Monica: Phoebe! Put that cigarette out!
Monica: I can do it, okay? Come on, lets go. (She and Ross get up)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are eating Chinese.]
Ross: (To Monica) Yeah, shes fired.
Monica: Excuse me, sir, would it help if I werent wearing underpants?
Monica: Well, you used to like playing the guitar.
Monica: (handing her a cup) Here you go sweetie.
Monica: Okay, fine. Let's talk about snow. -- Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa, where my husband is having sex on a copying machine?
Monica: (to Joey) Okay, Ill go!