words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Monica: (inspecting his leg) Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a tough spot.
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
Monica: We are! Help us!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Monica: Joey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Monica: I know.
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Ross: (in a stupor) Hey Chandler. (Sees Monica.) Monica!
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Monica: Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Oh no!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Monica: Yes it's true.
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
Monica: I guess I wanted to keep it (Pause) as a souvenir.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Joey: No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has been trying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
A Female Student: Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica carries a box out of Rachels room.]
Monica: No! (They both laugh.) Oyster?
MONICA: Is your tongue swelling up?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Monica: Why are so mad at him?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone but Monica is there playing Monopoly.]
(He and Monica laugh)
Monica: Im gonna go to the bathroom, maybe Ill see you there in a bit?
(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]
Monica: Whats the charity?
Janine: (to Monica and Rachel) Bye.
Chandler: Well, why dont you tell her to stop being silly! (Monica mocks him and he joins in.)
Monica: Oh, I like Elizabeth.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?
RICHARD: Yeah, if I have to. Monica, I don't wanna lose you, so if I have to do it all over again, then I will.
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: Well...Id better get going.
Monica: Our guys a great dancer!
Monica: Youre not supposed to look!
Monica: All right relax Mr. Ive Had Sex Four Times!
Monica: (To Chandler) Do you want our guy to be your guy?
Monica: Ooh! I'm sorry! I think, I THINK, that may have missed the table!
Monica: Oh my God! Are-are you crying?
Monica: Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn't breezy?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Monica: Does Ralph mumble when youre not paying attention?
The Museum Official: (on phone) Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum. Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, it is available (Chandler runs to answer the phone.)
Monica: I blame London.
Monica: Hey! How did it go with Elizabeth?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Monica: And slept with the professor.
Monica: Uh, would you stop it with that already?!
MONICA: Because they made me.
Monica: I cant promise anything. (She starts to dig in.)
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Monica: In 1981 you were 13!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Hey!
MONICA: DON'T...be too long with the phone.
Monica: Eldad, this is Rachel.
Chandler: There you go! There you are! (Rachel stares at Monica and Chandler)
Monica: Oop, your cake is ready!
Monica: No, Ross, we do not hate Emily. We-we just, we just think that you're having to sacrifice a whole lot to make her happy.
Monica: No! You cant do that!
Monica: Oh my God, oh my God. (on intercom) Call me on the phone!
Monica: Thats right Patrick, bye-bye!
Monica: Hes great! I mean we have such a good time together! Hes so funny, and sooo sweet, and Im not attracted to him at all!!
Rachel: (as she's being dragged) What are you? Monica!! Stop it!! Oh my God! Stop it! (Monica drags her totally onto the floor and on her back.)
Monica: Oh God! Hes gonna come by and borrow some candles for his big date!
Ross: You go get em. (to Monica) What did I do to you? Did I hurt you in some way?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, (And thats the last time for that line, no more Chandler and Joeys or Monica and Rachels, ever!) Joey and Ross are carrying the last table of Rachels. Rachel follows slowly, but is stopped by Monica.]
Phoebe: (looks at Monica) Hey, yknow what might cheer you up?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are eating Monicas dinner.]
Monica: Weeeell, it's rum, and-
Monica: Well at least, Im going to mute it.
Monica: Chandler.
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
Chandler: Gap commercial. (To Monica) So did you book them? Did you call?
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
Monica: What?
Monica: I will.
Monica: Yes.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are both getting undressed.]
Monica: No, Ill do it. You just stick to your job.
Monica: That's your call.
[Scene: Dr. Burkes office, Rachel and Monica are waiting as the doctor arrives.]
Monica: No really, they're OK.
Monica: Oh-oh, no no don't worry, I'm gonna wash it.
Monica: Well, what happened?
Monica: Was it...
Monica: Joey, take your time with that. That's my last batch.
Monica: Were supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes.
Monica: (startled) Ahh! Arent you dressed yet?
[Scene: Rachels Old Bedroom, Continued from earlier. Monica enters the room.]
Monica: What are peanut butter fingers?!
Monica: Ok, for my next song I think I�ll sing something a little more upbeat. All right? Oh, how about the PointerSisters �I am so excited�. And make it bouncy!
Phoebe: Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
Monica: Did anybody else feel they just wanted to peel the skin off their body, to have something else to do?
Phoebe: Monica, leave him alone!
Monica: (picking up the book) Chicken Soup for the Soul?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to comfort Chandler. Joey is absent.]
Monica: Oh, we used to drive each other crazy playing the shadow game.
Monica: You just put an empty carton back in the fridge!
Monica: Uhm, we just wanna give you a heads-up. Bill and Colleen hate us.
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Monica: You sold me out.
Monica: You had no right to go out with him.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Revealing her anger to point at her best friend) We both do that!
Monica: Fine!
(Phoebe grabs each of them by an ear.) Monica and Rachel: Ow! Ow! Ow!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
Monica: This is so typical. Y'know, we give, and we give, and we give. And then- we just get nothing back! And then one day, y'know, it's just, you wake up, and "See you around!" Let's go, Phoebe.
Monica: A small puff of air, now come on!
Monica: Wh?! What about my allergies?!
Monica: (laughs sarcastically) Rachel is not going to pick your stupid guy.
Chandler: (smiling cheekily) I do! Want a hint? huh? "I do" (Monica looks confused, so Chandler repeats) "I do".