words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the entire gang is there, eating breakfast. Phoebe is on the couch, fidgeting.]
(She throws them into the kitchen and Rachel picks them up with the handle of a large spoon. Chandler and Monica have horrified looks on their faces.)
Monica: Yeah!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
Monica: (inspecting his leg) Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a tough spot.
Monica: We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't want everyone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going really well is because it's a secret.
Monica: We are! Help us!
Joey: All right! But, (To Monica) you do it with me once.
Monica: Joey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Monica: Hey, Phoebe!
Monica: Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I was going to eat it myself, but (motions that he can have it.)
Monica: Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
Monica: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is there as Phoebe and Rachel return from the class.]
Monica: Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
(He goes to open the door to his apartment, but finds it locked. As he's getting out his keys, Chandler and Monica quickly jump up from making out in the living room and run to Chandler's bedroom. The apartment has about 20 candles burning all over the place. Joey opens the door and ushers Cynthia in.)
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's; continued from earlier. Joey is closing the door after Rachel leaves and is about to confront Chandler and Monica.]
Monica: We're so sorry.
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Monica: I know.
(Ross walks in, eating cotton candy. Monica nudges Chandler who hides the picture in his magazine. Ross sits down on the chair, he seems kinda out of it.)
Ross: (in a stupor) Hey Chandler. (Sees Monica.) Monica!
Monica: Ross, are you okay?
Monica: Why?!
Monica: A pill?
Monica: Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
[Scene: The Class; Monica has taken Rachel's spot.]
Monica: (yelling and waving her hand in the air) I know! I know! I know!
The Teacher: Monica, you asked the question.
Rachel: (sees the picture) Oh my God! That's Monica!!
Chandler: (Sees the picture) Oh no! No! No! No! (Monica gasps as well.)
Rachel: Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
Monica: (grabbing the picture) Give me that!
Monica: It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
Monica: Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Monica: Oh no!
Rachel: Monica, is this true?
Monica: Yes it's true.
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
Monica: I guess I wanted to keep it (Pause) as a souvenir.
Ross: My God Monica!!
Joey: No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has been trying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
A Female Student: Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
Monica: (entering, happily) All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I just convinced Paul to give us a test next week!
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
(Monica and Chandler both remember a special moment between them.)
Monica: Okay. Does it have to do with Ross and Rachel?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just gotten back from brunch and is telling Chandler about it.]
Monica: Lets go big bunny!
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are at the couch.]
Rachel: Oh yeah! (She gasps.) Oh my God! That is our friend! (Monica covers her face.) It's Naked Ross! (Monica turns and buries her face in Chandler's shoulder.)
Rachel: Yeah but, maybe its not what we think. Maybe its tell Monica Im sorry I drank the last of the milk.
Rachel: Hi! I just wanna-(sees Monica)-Ahhh!!! Oh my God! (She runs out in horror.) Oh my God!
Monica: Wow! A star! (The class glares at her.) I know you all hate me and-and Im sorry, but I dont care.
(Ross spots Chandler and starts chasing him around the kitchen table. Chandler runs and hides behind Monica.)
[Time lapse, Monica has joined in and is calling to get out of work.]
Monica:: Honey look we can do something else, do you want me to get into the tub and thrash.
Monica: Phoebe I think he would notice if you didnt have a baby in nine months!
[Scene: A Little White Chapel, Chandler and Monica are entering.]
Monica: Try feeding her again.
Chandler: No, its not! When I looked at the other ring I could see Monicas face when I gave it to her, yknow? And I could see her saying yes. When I look at this ring, all I see is a ring! Unless I look at it really closely and then I can see my own eye. (Does so and laughs.) Look, this is the most important thing Im gonna do in my life. I wanna make sure its perfect.
[Scene: Back to the living room. Monica and Rachel enter and hug each other. The guys see this.]
Monica: Ok, I'm sensing that this is some kind of word play, because you are pink with barely controlled glee.
Monica: Demi Moore is not a he.
Joey: Monica just called from the cab. She said they should be here any minute. And apparently, there's some big surprise.
Monica: Why does my cinamon stick have an eraser?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone except Ross is there watching Days of Our Lives.]
[Scene: Chandler's office, Monica and him are at a party his office is throwing.]
Drunk Man: My god!! You must have been a teenage when you had him. (Monica stares straight forward after the comment. Chandler tries to console her by patting her on the shoulder.)
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
MONICA: Are you sure he didn't break it because it really hurts.
MONICA: Your boyfriend has been in there for over an hour. I can't believe it, it's like I'm living with him again. He's here when I go to sleep, he's here when I wake up, he's here when I want to use the shower, ughh. It's like I'm sixteen all over again .
(Chandler can't believe what he's hearing. He looks at Monica, then at the others, then back at Monica.)
Monica: Shes over a week late! She gotta have it today, right?
Monica: (still talking to the woman) All right, Ill do it just this once! But you cant tell anybody!
Monica: I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)
Joey: Because, Monica, the guys so good, and I really, really want this part.
Monica: Joey, please dont do that. I think its best that we just forget about it.
Rachel: Well, I mean, sure, of course. But... you already gave that to Monica, so...
Monica: (stopping Joey from answering) Ohh! Fish, seaweed, a sunken ship.
Monica: He's in the bathroom. I don't think you wanna go in there!
Monica: Youre wrong! The centerpieces are fine! Do you ever get scared at all?
Monica: Ross! That is so sweet of you to get Phoebe that bike! When I heard the story, I almost cried.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is reading as Monica and Chandler enter.]
Monica: All right, youre telling me you can eat an entire turkey in just one sitting?
Monica: Okay, Phoebe, y'know what? That-thats it, thats it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? Theyre not the right size, theyre not Victorian, and they just dont go.
Monica: Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!
Monica: All right, well call you when we get back.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's bedroom, Chandler has his eyes closed, while Monica is fully awake.]
Monica: Hey dad, what's up? (Listens) Oh God. Ross, it's Nana.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey, still looking like Captain Stubing, is practicing his slipknots as Monica enters.]
Monica: Alright, we don't know that it's him. I mean, it could be the football guy.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Monica comes from the bathroom as Chandler enters.]
Chandler: I think I do! (They all laugh.) Thank you, Monica.
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
[Scene: the hotel lobby. Monica, Phoebe, Chandler and Mike walk in from the outside.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are watching a movie as Chandler comes in from his bedroom.]
(Chandler runs out the door and closes it behind him. After a short pause the door opens and Chandler comes rushing back through, grabs Monica, kisses her good-bye, and heads back out.)
Monica: Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn't mean anything to me.
Monica: (entering from her bedroom carrying a present) Ok, these were unbelievably expensive, and I know he's gonna grow out of them in like, 20 minutes, but I couldn't resist. (There a little pair of Nike shoes.)
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, and Monica gets to keep her? In her house? I am so jealous!
(He turns to get his coat and Monica gives Rachel and Phoebe two thumbs up as Chandler walks over to Ross.)
Monica: So Phoebe, why are there men's shoes by the door.
Monica: (checks to see if it works) Yes, you are so smart! (Kisses him.)
MONICA: Hey, you got me, put it in.
[Cut to Monicas restaurant kitchen, its the episode where Joey is working as a waiter at Monicas restaurant. Joey is patting her breast from when she set it on fire.]
Rachel: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new with you?
Monica: It's worse. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that I'm gonna be seeing you soon. I think I may even try to get out of here early.
Monica: What we did was wrong. Oh god, I just had sex with somebody that wasn't alive during the Bicentennial.
Monica: -leg?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
Monica: Well, now she has no eyebrows, mission accomplished.
(Monica closes the door and slowly walks into Rachel’s old and now empty room.)
Monica: Hey guys check it out! My mom sent me the paper!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are still out on the balcony.]
Monica: Oh my God, I went to high school with her. (to Rachel) Rachel! Hi!
Monica: I cant do it! (Ross falls into Monicas room)
Monica: I will! But not tonight. For dinner music, I thought we could listen to that tape you made me.
Monica: Come on, okay, come on this is for all womankind. Lets kill um!
Monica: Amen.
Chandler: (glaring at her) Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Were going to dinner remember?!
[Time lapse. Chandler and Joey are making the fire, Monica and Phoebe are inside. Ross enters, carrying luggage.]
MONICA: How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank.
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Monica and Phoebe: Hugh! Hugh Grant!
Monica: Come on! (The girls all run out and Joey holds up Chandler by smiling.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the next day Rachel, Phoebe, and Chandler are there as Monica enters.]
Monica: (laughing) Oh, dont you guys look cute. You guys make such a cute couple.
Parker: No, no, no wait! Dont tell me. Let me guess. (Points as he says their names) Joey, Monica, Ross, Rachel and, Im sorry Phoebe didnt mention you. (Chandler makes a face) Chandler, Im kidding all ready youre my favorite!
Monica: Umm, okay. If its a boy its Daniel.
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
MONICA: Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.]
[Scene: Central Perk. The entire gang is there, and Chandler and Monica are handing out presents.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as enter except Joey enter.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is holding a book as she, Rachel, and Monica drink some tea as Chandler looks on.]
Chandler: (entering) Hey Monica, here's your broom back.
Chandler: Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
Monica: (to all) Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how much you all like me.
Monica: Right, you only go for them 5 minutes before they get married.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and Monica are returning from Central Perk.]
Monica: Ugh, yknow, umm we gotta get up early and catch that plane for New York.
Monica: It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night? I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.