words in movies
[Scene: Ralph Lauren. Mr Zelner's office. Ross knocks on the door and enters.]
Mr Zelner: Oh right, uhm, Don?
Mr Zelner: Uh... What can I do for you?
Mr Zelner: Ah, did she ask you to come here and do this?
Mr Zelner: Wow, that is tempting.
Mr Zelner: She is good!
Mr Zelner: But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah, it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Mr Zelner: Yeah, his name is Ross. (Ross looks very surprised) What?
Mr Zelner: Yeah, they're all he talks about, why?
Ross: How would he like to come with me to the Museum of Natural History after everyone else has left, just the two of us, and he can touch anything he wants. (Mr. Zellner looks shocked). I just heard it as you must have heard it and that’s not good. Let me start again. I’m a paleontologist, you’ll be there with us and the touching refers only to bones… fossils!
Mr Zelner: You can really arrange that?
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Mr Zelner: That’s great. I worry about little Ross. He’s always reading, he's collecting rocks and he’s obsessed with dinosaurs.
[Scene: Mr. Zellner's office. There is a knock on the door.]
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Mr Zelner: This may surprise you, but re-hiring fired employees, is not my main job.
Mr Zelner: (obviously amused) Not good, Ron.
Mr Zelner: (Takes a long look at the egg while he considers it) Wow, that's pretty cool (Takes the egg from Ross)
Mr Zelner: Okay, you got it.
Mr Zelner: This is gonna make me very popular.
Mr Zelner: (looks at Ross, for a long moment, confused) I meant with my son.
Mr. Douglas: Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Mr. Heckles: (as Phoebe and Rachel leave) You owe me a cat.
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
Mr. Geller: Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! (Starts to get up.)
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
Mr. Geller: Chandler, Im gonna have you arrested.
MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
Mr. Tribbiani: You're gonna keep an eye on us?
MR. GREENE: What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday?
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, but yknow, I think the reason were not getting that spin right is because my apartments too small.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
Mr. Geller: I think there are people in there having sex.
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
Chandler: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty."
Mr. Geller: Whaddya got there?
Chandler: Mr. and Mrs. Geller, you look wonderful, it is great to have you hear, let us take off your coats!
Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
Mrs. Bing: Mr. Geller.
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
Salon girl: Ok. Very good. Have a seat right over here Mr. Bing and Sonia will be right with you.
Mr. Geller: Beautiful! (Turns to watch with him)
Mr. Geller: Why would you serve food on such a sharp stick? (Looking a toothpick)
Mr. Thompson: Our next item is the romantic trip to Paris. (Pause.) It goes to Emil Alexander high a high bid of 2,300.
Mark: Okay, okay look, I know I'm being Mr. Inappropriate today, but it's just so tough, I mean see you walking around and I just wanna touch you and hold you, come on no one's around, just, just kiss me.
Mr. Thompson: So glad you brought someone.
Mr. Thompson: Your generous contribution brings us a big step closer to building the youth center.
Mr Zellner: (confused) That's great!
Mr. Tribbiani: Remember when you were a little kid, I used to take you to the navy yard and show you the big ships?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Mr. Tribbiani is on the phone.]
Mr. Tribbiani: Thank you. Uh...
Mr. Tribbiani: (To Phoebe) What happened to the, uh, puppet guy?
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Monica: All right relax Mr. Ive Had Sex Four Times!
Mr. Tribbiani: Huh?
Mr. Tribbiani: What kinda change?
Mr. Tribbiani: Yeah, but this is
Mr. Tribbiani: I can't do that!
Mr. Tribbiani: Hey, Joe.
Mr. Tribbiani: We'll go to a hotel.
Mr. Tribbiani: I don't want you taking that thing.
Mr. Tribbiani: Hey. Morning, dear.
Mr. Geller: Not just restaurants, from our house.
The Director: (entering carrying a newspaper) Here we go people! (starts reading the review) Boxing Day! The Lucille Lortel Theatre, blah-la-la-la Ah-ha! Joey Tribianni, gives an uneven performance, but Mr. Tribianni is not the worst thing in this production.
Phoebe: Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
Mr.Heckles: See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
Mr. Heckles: (to Eric) Who are you?
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
Mr. Douglas: Nina.
Mr. Geller: 'Cause there's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. You always wanted to go to that Colonial Williamsburg. How 'bout we do that?
[Scene: The Hotel, Monicas room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]
Mr. Geller: I was just thinking. When my time comes-
Mr. Geller: All-right fine, but I just want to say, Im not paying for your wine cellar. You thieving, would be speaking German if it werent for us, cheap little man. (Emilys stepmum looks shocked. Jack and Judy get up and leave.)
Nina: Mr.Douglas... (flirting defensively) ..cool tie.
Mr Campbell: Dating profile? I-I-I'm talking about the work resumé.
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, its Joeys second lesson with Rachel as the resident sailing expert.]
Mr. Heckles: That's my monkey.
Phoebe: Okay, thank you, Mr. Heckles. (They move off)
Mr. Heckles: I wasn't ready for it.
(Mr. Heckles opens the door)
Mr. Heckles: Whaddyou want?
Phoebe: (with a deep voice) Mr. Bing's office. (Listens) No I'm sorry, he's in a meeting right now.
Mr. Geller: (also lying) Ill help you dial.
Mr. Heckles: C'mere, Patti. (Marcel turns round)
Mr. Heckles: C'mere, Patti. (Turns to Mr. Heckles)
Mr. Douglas: Youre kidding? She seems so...
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
Mr. Heckles: You owe me a waffle.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Mr. and Mrs. Geller enter looking particularly refreshed. Monica follows looking rather pale.]
Mr. Thompson: (approaching) Mr. Tribbiani.
All: Hey! Hey, Mr. Trib!
MNCA: So, Mr. Rastatter, what exactly does this job entail? The ad wasn't too clear.
Ross: (turning towards him) Yes Mr. Lewis, how can I help you?
Mr. Geller: Well, the garage flooded sweetie and it ruined everything in your boxes. Im sorry.
Mr.Heckles: I could have cats.
MR. TREEGER: You never know.
MONICA: Mr. Heckles.
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is sitting at her desk as Mr. Waltham comes in.]
MR. BOYLE: He didn't have any.
Chandler: Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I cant believe that you would have a thirty-year-old daughter! (To Mr. Geller) And you! I cant believe that you would have a tux thats thirty years old! (Puts his hand on Mr. Gellers shoulder.)
RACHEL: [answering the door] Mr. Treeger.
Mr. Geller: Well Im peeking. (He peeks.) Oh my God!
PHOEBE: Ok, it's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building. Go into the light, Mr. Heckles!
Mr. Tribbiani: Oh! ...Hello, dear. (She whips the curtain shut in horror)
MR. GELLER: There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She's gonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. [pulls a quarter from behind her ear]
Joey: 46. Wow! Who's well educated now, Mr. I-forgot-ten-states?
MR. TREEGER: Oh, yeah, they were so personal, really showed you cared.
MR. TREEGER: Uhh, you said there was a party.
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Mr. Heckles: That's not my monkey. Just the dress is mine, you can send that back whenever.
MONICA: Hello, Mr. Heckles.
MR A: Phoebe?
MR A: You're saying, my wife is in you?
Ross: Oh God, thank you! (Runs and gives all of them a group hug.) Umm, uh, Mr. Stevens Id like you to meet my friends uh, this is Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler.
Mr. Zelner: Yeah, its not like I dont have a sense of humor, huh? Hell, I even enjoy a naughty limerick now and then. But theres a time and a place, huh?! Unless you uh, have a limerick right now? (They both nod no.) No? Okay, well uh, youve (Grabs the chocolates.) got my fax number. (Exits.)