words in movies
Ross: Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
Phoebe: Well, he may not be my soul mate, but a girls gotta eat.
Ross: Oh my God! What if, what if they get married? Then hed be the stepfather of my child.
Monica: Oh my God! Thats my restaurant, Im the chef there.
Chandler: I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife!
Joey: (pouring two glasses) Hey look Ross, you need to understand something okay? I uh I am never gonna act on this Rachel thing, okay? I-I would never do anything to jeopardize my friendship with you. (He hands Ross a glass.)
Ross: If she is where you are then uh then my feeling weird about it shouldnt stand in the way.
Joey: Oh my God I have to tell her! I havent even thought about what I will say. What should I say?
Rachel: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. (Joey is staring at the table.) Are you okay?
Joey: I would, but this is a nice place and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvin doing Hobbs.
Rachel: Oh my God! Really?! Can I see it?
Joey: Well uh, I went down there and told him that no one treats my friends like that and that hed better come up here and apologize. Ill see you later. (Starts to leave)
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Phoebe: Oh my God! (they hug)
Rachel: Joey relax! My mother picked her up two hours ago. You were there!
Monica: (excitedly) Oh my God, we're gonna be parents!
Joey: Thanks. Yeah, I figure if I wear these in my scenes at least I wont get spit in the eyes, yknow?
Monica: I think the things that you said about me are really unfair, and I would like for you to give my bouillabaisse another chance.
Joey: Hey Rach, listen I was thinkin uh, Im gonna have an extra room over at my place
Charlie: Oh my God! Did you talk to him?
Mike: Yeah look, about tomorrow, I... I've got a question for ya. I just found out that one of my groomsmen had had an emergency and can't make it.
Ross: Oh and you know what, it will be even better tomorrow, because I won't be constantly interrupted by Joey checking to see if they put chocolates on my pillow yet. (Someone knocks on the door, Ross goes to open and it's Joey, Rachel and Chandler).
Ross: What, oh my God. What did you do?
Rachel: You know, this happens all the time to my computer at work.
JOEY: That is so not my motto.
Ross: Okay, hold my crawler.
Ross: Oh my God, I love you.
Ross: That's Ben, my son from my first marriage.
Phoebe: Oh my God, Mike!
Monica: Oh my God, he's gonna do it now. Please, I cannot watch this, let's go.
RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute.
Monica: Okay. (in her microphone) It's zero hour. All teams execute on my count. (to all) Let's get this bad boy on the road.
Joey: My folks.
Rachel: He was a hamster! I am not going to vacuum up my baby!
Rachel: Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
Joey: (entering) Thats my line! (He walks up the aisle and to the rabbi) I can take it from here, thanks. (To all) Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a little late. You may be confused by this now, (Hes still in costume) but you wont be Memorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again. Huh? (Monica is shocked and looks around.) We are gathered here today, to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for a long time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now, as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
Chandler: I need you to come to this bachelor party for my weird cousin Albert, y'know he's the botanist.
Monica: Ha! My point!
Rachel: Excuse me, sir. Hi, you come in here all time. I was just wondering, do you think there's a possibility that you could give me an advance on my tips?
Joey: (Realizes that he has forgotten all about the double date) Oh my God!
Ross: Oh my God, wh-what happened?
Phoebe: Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talk to Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th, 2032.
Monica: Oh my God! You're good!
Monica: Oh my God, that's Charlie!
Charlie: Didn't you feel so stupid that you didn't see the signs? My fiancé was always going away on these long weekends with his tennis partner.
Joey: I hate my friends. (They shake on it as if they just made a pact) Alright, look. There's gotta be a way that we can stop this from happening.
Monica: Limited seating my ass. Lets see who made the cut. (To the couple sitting to her right.) Hi!
Joey: Oh my God, it's Ross. What are we gonna do?
Phoebe: Something just brushed up against my right leg!
Phoebe: No!! No way! No! And stop using my name! And shame on you! (Yells into the apartment) And shame on all of you! Youre disgusting! Especially you (points to someone) with that! (Storms away.)
Rachel: Sorry, I just uhm... I can't seem to get Ross out of my head...
Mr. Oberblau: (seeing her) Oh, you're back... (to Ross) this is my wife, Nancy.
Ross: No!! Y'know-y'know dont do me any favours. In fact, where, wheres the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? Id like that back too. Yes, I do.
Joey: More back talk. And yes, I may be borrowing a few lines from my recent unsuccessful audition for "Family Honor 2: Thissa Time Itsa Personal."
Mike: Oh, it's... my girlfriend.
JADE: Oh, Bob, he was nothing compared to you. I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming your name.
Ross: (entering) Hey! Has anyone seen my shirt? Its a button down, like a, like a faded salmon?
Precious: My name is Precious.
PHOEBE: Oh! I can't believe it. I can't believe this. We're just like, sitting at home, trying to guess Joey's fingers, and you guys are out like partying and having fun, and you know, all, "hey, Blowfish, suck on my neck".
Chandler: Well, I umm, I mean this is just off the top of my head now, umm but I have this friend. This actor friend and he would kill me if he thought I was doing this umm, but umm would it be possible for him to get an audition for your movie say on Thursday?
Ross: No-no-no, no, umm, actually American surprise parties are-are-are very short. Its usually, "Surprise!" And then, "Oh my God, Im so surprisedgood-bye!"
Parker: My God what a fantastically well lit hallway!
Monica: I'll put a pillowcase over my head.
Chandler: There's a hair in my coffee.
Chandler: No, its not! When I looked at the other ring I could see Monicas face when I gave it to her, yknow? And I could see her saying yes. When I look at this ring, all I see is a ring! Unless I look at it really closely and then I can see my own eye. (Does so and laughs.) Look, this is the most important thing Im gonna do in my life. I wanna make sure its perfect.
Chandler: All right ladies, heres what were gonna do. (Points to a stripper.) You are gonna take off my clothes. (To another two strippers) You two, go get the oils. (To another stripper) And you just constantly scream at the top of your voice, "Chandlers the king! Chandlers the king!"
Katie: Listen, to be honest, home deliveries are really a part of my job description.
Monica: Oh my god!
Mr. Geller: Ive been thinking about getting rid of it. I was driving it the other day and saw my reflection in a store window. Your mothers right, I do look like an ass.
MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
Ross: My fajitas!!
Charlie: Oh, you know what? This is nothing. My father is a raging alcoholic.
Kim: My late husband gave me that lighter. (Rachel laughs.) I'm not kidding.
Rachel: (entering, with a guy) Hi guys! This is Josh. Josh, these are my friends, and that's Ross.
Rachel: Oh my god, are we supposed to answer?
Ross: So you took off my pants and shoes?
Roy: You were talking about me before! Look, I don't need this! I'm outta here! Where's my hat? (goes to get it) Look, I've been in this business for a long time!
Ross: The kid...? (To the kid) Excuse me, uh, that's, that's my puck.
Joey: Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? And Im the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
Charlie: Oh my God! (pauses) I'm your groupie!
Ross: You sprayed my front twice!
Mindy: I hope you can find some way to be happy for me. And I hope you'll still be my maid of honor...?
Amanda: Let’s see.. to assure you get this directly, ring me back on my mobile.
Phoebe: Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! (He exits and she goes to shut it off.) Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! (She takes off the plastic cover and looks for the button.) Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button? (Finds it.) Oh here it is! (Picks it up off of the floor.) Oh! (She presses it hard, but of course it would help if the button was still attached to the detector. In frustration she presses it so hard it causes pain in her thumb.) Ohh, God!
Chandler: Oh, I hate that. I once had a thing of half and half, stole my car.
ROSS: I'm here. How's my little boy? Want Daddy to change your diaper? So, did you have fun with Uncle Joey and Uncle Chandler today?
Chandler: It just keeps getting worse and worse! Y'know? I mean its bad enough that Im in love with my roommates girlfriendwhich by the way, I think she knows. Because every time were in the room together theres this weird like energy between us. And call me crazy, but I think she likes me too. And now I have seen her naked. I mean at least when Ive seen her with clothes on, I could imagine her body was like covered in boles or something. But there are no boles, shes smooth! Smooth! (leaves)
Phoebe: Right, yeah, ok, I'll ask the butler to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.
Rachel: Like a little girl. I know. I know. I know. This is all my fault; I wanted him to open up. But God, I didnt know that I was gonna unleash this-this weepy, clingy, moist monster!
Rachel: Phoebe, you were right. I should've never gone to London, and from now on you make all of my decisions for me.
Monica: Oh My God!
Phoebe: (Also gets up and starts taking her purse) Oh my God. Was Mike with him?
Rachel: What? Oh my God! I'm so sorry. Joey? Are you ok?
Monica: Oh my god, I am losing my mind.
Phoebe: You know what Amanda said to me when she got me on the phone? (apes Amanda in a british accent) "Oh, so sorry to catch you on your Mo-Bile!" If-if you don't wanna get me on my mo-Bile, don't call me on my mo-Bile!"
Joey: my god woman! How many people do you have to had been with not to remember any of this?
Dr. Green: You think you can knock up my daughter and then not marry her?! Im gonna kill you!!
Monica: On three, 1 2 3! (Rachel turns her head on three to avoid the drops.) Now my pillow's all wet! (She was trying to fool Rachel and squeezed the eyedropper.)
DR. BURKE: Yeah, that's my job. Alright, look up. . . look down, now open your eyes, now look down. That's right, look into the light. Now look at me. . . OK. Your eyes look good. Those are good eyes.
Joey: Um, my present!
Judy: After all, my parents died very young.
Rachel: Ross, what are you talking about? (she sees the cake) oh! Oh my God! They put my baby’s face on a penis!
Joey: I called the sperm bank today, they haven't sold a single unit of Tribianni. Nobody wants my product. I mean, I-I-I don't get it (tries to drink the rest of the jam out of the jar and gets it all over his face, on his chin, nose, etc.) Maybe if they met me in person.
Monica: Hey, where are all my ovulation-sticks? There's only one here.
Chandler: Ooh! That's my girl!
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
Rachel: What? Oh my God! To who?
Ross: (to Joey) Oh my God!
Joey: Everything is gonna be fine. Just follow my lead, okay? All you have to do is pretend to be Mike.
Phoebe: Uhm, no. I'm gonna have my friends call me Valerie.
Monica: Oh my God, Mike was gonna propose?