words in movies
Joey: Hey Ross, check this out! (he tries to spin a basketball on his fingertip but he throws it against a table) yeah, I can't do that!
Chandler: Maybe we finish this for him! (he sits down on the sofa and he start typing on Ross' computer) "Also I cloned a dinosaur in my lab. She's now my girlfriend. I don't care what society says. It's the best sex I've ever had"... aaand SEND!
Joey: Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount...
Ross: That only is not funny, it's physically impossible! Ok? Depending on the species I'd have to have a six foot long... (pause) It's not funny!!
Ross: I can't believe you put that on my alumni page!
Ross: You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
Ross: You've really crossed the line here, but that's okay, it's ok 'cause I'm on my way to buy some Photoshop software and a stack of gay porn. That's right! Your coming out is about to get real graphic.
Rachel: Joey, come on!
Phoebe: Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me, but I'm actually feeling a lot better. Yeah, I just kinda want to be alone right now.
(Someone knocks on the door)
Phoebe: There is a speakerphone on the base unit...
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment: Ross is doing something on his laptop when Chandler walks in]
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Chandler: No, come on, you know that's not true.
Chandler: Alright look, let's think about this, ok, do you really think that people are gonna stir up your family at this tragic time? That people are gonna post condolences on a website? This is not about people not caring that you're dead .This is about people not having a decent outlet for their grief.
Chandler: Right, I mean, come on, I'm sure that if you had a funeral or a memorial service, tons of people would come.
[Scene: Joey's room: Joey is sitting on his bed reading DooL transcript when Rachel walks in]
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment: Phoebe, Monica and Mike sitting on the couch]
Monica: Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
(someone knocks on the door)
Ross: Yes, you're right. Still somebody must have seen it... I mean, I went to that school for 4 years, I didn't have an impact on anyone?
Chandler: Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
(someone knocks on the door) Oh, great. More party boys for Chandler!
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
Ross: Did you hear that? Kori Weston had a crush on me!!
Ross: (on the phone) No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok? (pause) Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless. (pause) Monica?
Joey: Not a problem. And listen, hey! Since you're gonna be here for a while, why don'tI was thinking we uh, put your name on the answering machine.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Oh, hi Wendy! (Listens) Yeah, eight o'clock. (Listens) What did we say? Ten dollars an hour?... (Listens) OK, great. (Listens) All right, I'll see you then. Bye. (hangs up)
CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?
Rachel: Okay, I'm not just waitressing. I'm.. I, um... I write the specials on the specials board, and, uh... and I, uh... I take the uh dead flowers out of the vase... Oh, and, um, sometimes Artelle lets me put the little chocolate blobbies on the cookies.
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
[Scene: Barry's Office, the post-coital Barry and Rachel are recovering on the chair.]
[A monkey jumps on the desk and hands the guy a beer. He opens the beer and is suddenly on the beach, in a hammock, with beautiful women all around.]
(Theyre all staring at him, with big, huge smiles on their faces.)
Chandler: Varrrrrroom! Hey! Watch it lady! Varrrrrrrrrrom! (makes a screeching sound as he pretends to stomp on the brakes.) Hey-hey good lookin! (honks the beds little horn on the steering wheel.) Varrrrrrrrroom. (notices Rachel and stops) All right, Ill leave. My beds so boring.
Rachel: Come on! I am here to take care of you! What do you need? Anything.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]
Joey: (answering the door.) Hey, how did you do that?! Come on in. (He brings them inside.)
[cut back to Joey on the beach towel]
Rachel: Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
[Phoebe gets up and goes into Rachels old room, a smile on her face.]
Amy: This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer.
Mike: One more thing... There... might be a picture of Precious on my coffee table.
Ross: Monica, let's go. Come on now people, woman in labor.
Joey: All right, come on look, Ross can take care of himself! Its not like hes Chandler!
Pete: Oh, it's good news. No, it's definitely good news. Hold on a second, I have another call. (clicks his remote) (to his other call) Hey, how's it going?
Phoebe: I dunno, well he got over the "We were on a break" thing really quickly.
ROSS: Ahh, oh that's OK, I mean, he's probably got, you know, parties to go to and stuff. But, ya know, he's moved on. Hey, that, that's the way it goes right.
Rachel: Ohh, I'm gonna be on the news!
Phoebe: Come on, Mom, Ill take you home.
Monica: Oh, theres banana on it.
RACH: Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?
PHOEBE: (imitating Rachel) "Oh, I have to get my number back.� Oh my God.� He's gone."� (smiles) Dead on.
PHOE: [comes back to couch, with cake] Sooo, what's goin' on, huh?
Chandler: (disgusted) Oh come on! (To Phoebe) Are you listening to this?
(Chandler opens the door and Monica sneaks up on it. They go inside.)
Credits [Scene: Central Perk. Russ enters. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
CHANDLER: Well, I relied on a carefully regimented program of denial and, and wetting the bed.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Rob are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: Uh, it's a piece of paper and it says, "Ross" on it.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are there, Joey is on the phone.]
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
Chandler: Look, I thought about it too, and I'm sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
Monica: Well, I�ll tell you what we�re gonna do: We are already late for Phoebe�s birthday dinner, so you point out put out that cigarette, we�re gonna put this fight on hold and go have sex.
Receptionist: (holds up her handshe is on the phone) It says to call this number if you're not completely satisfied with this candy bar. Well, I'm not completely satisfied.
Ross: Laugh it up, but the jokes on you. Because we dont need to get divorced, okay? We were just gonna get an annulment.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Phoebe: Rachel? Oh, good. Hey, by the way, did you just get on the plane?
[Scene: A restaurant. Joey is on his date with Phoebe’s friend, Sarah. They are sitting opposite each other on a table for two. Their waiter approaches with two plates.]
(She throws a water balloon at him and hits him on the head and hits him again at the waist with another one.)
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
(Ross stares at her. Thinks about it. Puts cards on table, face down.)
(We the guys knock on the door upstairs, and the guy answering it.)
PHOEBE: OK, I smell smoke. Maybe that's 'cause someone's pants are on fire.
Monica: (entering from bedroom) Okay, Ill be back in just a minute. Oh, Phoebe Im sorry that I left lipstick marks on the phone.
Phoebe: What? (the guys keep laughing.) What? You guys, what is going on? You not like Robert? (the guys keep laughing.) Why are you laughing?!
Phoebe: No, its not! We were just goofing around and I dared him to try them on.
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Mr. Tribbiani: You're gonna keep an eye on us?
ROSS: (entering from Rachel's bedroom) Come on out, honey! I'm telling you look good! (turns around, and under his breath, to the rest of the guys) Tell her she looks good, tell her she looks good.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is reading and there is knock on the door which she answers.]
Ross: (on machine) "Hi Rach, are you there? It's me, pick up. Rachel. Rach!"
Chandler: Hi, Nina. Come on in.
(A commercial for sunglasses comes on.)
Chandler: Joey got meat sauce on the banister again! (He goes into the bathroom to wash his hands.)
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, he talked to her, but she got on the plane anyway.
Ross: I do-I do not have a boyfriend. Theres a guy in one of my classes who-who has a crush on me.
Joey: Whoa! Is this porn? What did I do? I mustve hit something on the remote.
Joey: Come on you guys, come on please-please just give her another chance, huh? Shell come around I promise.
Monica: YES! (Chandler gets an "oh no!" look on his face)
[Cut to Rosss second wedding reception, Joey has just told him the band is ready with Rachel looking on.]
Chandler: I dont know. (He picks the chick up and turns it over, trying to determine the sex of the chick, and blows on it.) I cant tell, what ever it was went back in too quickly.
Ross: And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really were on a break. (baby talk) Yes we were! Yes we were! (picks Emma up) Come here gorgeous. (puts her on his knees and talks to her) Oh! Look at you! You are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a... a little bitty baby, you know that? But you've got... (in a softer voice) You've got big beautiful eyes... Yes you do... and a... and a big round belly. (emphasises the B's) Big baby butt! I like big butts. (raps) I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / and a round thing in your face you get...(Emma laughs) Oh my God, Emma... you're laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done that before... Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot... What? What? You... you wanna hear some more? Uhm...(raps) My anaconda don't want none / unless you got buns hon... (Emma laughs again and Ross looks worried) I'm a terrible father!
Man: Oh, let me guess some idiot on a cell phone wasnt paying attention?
LITTLE BULLY: Look, here's what we'll do. We'll put all keys and watches in the hat over there. Alright. [they all put their keys and watches in the hat and put it on a mail box] Alright, c'mon man, let's do this.
Rachel: No-no! Big bear! Big bear outside! I think I-Iwould youactually, would you go check on that?
Rachel: Oh (happy) oh no just stopped to throw up a little bit. (Emma starts crying again.) Oh come on, what am I gonna do, its been hours and it wont stop crying.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is on the phone, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the kitchen.]
(Monica closes the door, Chandler knocks, and Monica opens it to reveal Chandler on his knees.)
Chandler: Oh come on man! At least let me finish this last one.
Joey: Okay, what if the puppy said, "Help me Chandler. All the other puppies pick on me."
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are still out on the balcony.]
Chandler: (answering phone) Hello. Hi, Janice! Can you hold on for a second? Okay. (to Monica and Rachel) Okay, what do I do?
Monica: (thinks about it) All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire he is out of there!
Monica: Y'know what? Y'know when I said that I want you to deal with this relationship stuff all on your own? Well, you're not ready for that.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Joey: Come on who? Who do you like? Tell me. You're not getting away that easy. Who do you like, who?
Monica: Come on! (The girls all run out and Joey holds up Chandler by smiling.)
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Yep! (Gets up) Oh, y'know what? If I heard a shot right now, I'd throw my body on you.
Ross: I can't believe Rachel just moved on and didn't say anything to me
Chandler: (laughs, but then moves to Phoebe) And don't get me started on the way that people from Tulsa talk.
Joey: Come on! Admit it! That was the best nap you ever had!
Chandler: All right, we havent had sex yet. Okay, whats the big deal? Yknow? This is special, and I want our love to grow until we move on to the next level.
Phoebe: (singing, drunk) My sticky shoes, my sticky-sticky shoes, why do you stick on me, ba-a-by! Thanks for the lights honey.
Chandler: Oh come on you big faker!
Ross: Hey! Hey! Come on! You can! I know you can do this! Lets go!
Charlie: (to Rachel) So, you know what, I really like those jackets with the shoulder pads on them. Where do you think those would be?
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, is Sidney there? (Listens) Oh, this is? (To the gang) Sidney's a woman.
Ross: Yes, that's what I have. It's not on the board.
(He kisses her on the cheek and heads to Central Perk.)
Chandler: Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of you doing the speech.
Tag: A year. On and off. I kinda thought we'd end up together. I don't anymore.
Jill: (on phone) I'm fine. No, I'm not alone... I don't know, some guy.
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?